


Taming The Wolf

by BarettaVendetta



Category: Naruto
Genre: Bestiality, Blood, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Suicide, Trauma, War, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-06
Updated: 2014-07-06
Packaged: 2018-02-07 17:21:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 16
Words: 99,898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1907436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BarettaVendetta/pseuds/BarettaVendetta
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The bonds between Sunagakure and Konoha are strengthened when a top Suna jounin falls in love with a Konoha chuunin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Labrador

“Come on, Taki-chan. Get up.”

Temari Nara placed her hand on her daughter's shoulder and shook her gently. Takarazuka Nara – Taki for short - groaned and rolled over to face the wall. Temari shook her harder, and Taki opened one bleary eye. “Mum? What is it?”

“Don't you remember?” sighed Temari. “Do you have to be reminded again? We've been preparing for this for the past few months. Today is the day that you're moving to Sunagakure to join the Puppet Squad.”

“The...puppet...squad?” mumbled Takarazuka. Her eyes slowly moved across the room, eventually coming to rest upon a pile of bundles. The tallest one contained Kitsune, the battle puppet that had been presented to her on her tenth birthday, and her weapon of choice. It was currently swathed in bandages, its five wooden tails tucked neatly between its legs.

“Yes, the puppet squad,” snapped Temari. “Get up, now. Honestly. You're as bad as your father.”

Takarazuka reluctantly dragged herself out of bed and fumbled around for a hair tie. She scraped back her dark hair, pulling it upwards and tying it into a scruffy ponytail. Yawning, she pulled on a pair of khaki shorts and a white cotton t-shirt; it was ridiculously hot in her mother's native village. Slowly, she padded to the bathroom and began to wash her face.

Temari, meanwhile, went downstairs. Her son, Shikane, was already finishing breakfast. Unlike his lazy sister, Shikane was full of energy, always up at the crack of dawn and eager to go out and train with his team. The Chuunin exams were coming up, and Shikane's sensei believed the kid had potential to become a Chuunin way before the other kids, just like his father. Albeit without his father's lazy streak, of course, Konohamaru had added mischievously. Temari had laughed along with him. Shikamaru might be an examiner, a leading jounin and an advisor to the Hokage to boot, but he was still not averse to the odd spot of cloud watching.

There was a knock at the door, and Shikane leapt up to answer it. His team mates, Inosuke Yamanaka and Chouyomi Akimichi, were waiting for him.

“Morning!” said Shikane cheerfully. “Where's Konohamaru-sensei meeting us?”

“At the war memorial,” answered Inosuke, while Choyomi fished in her bag for another pack of crisps. “He said something about our formation attack. Hi, Mrs. Nara,” he added as Temari appeared in the doorway behind Shikane, and bowed. Chouyomi followed suit.

“Morning, Inosuke. Morning, Chouyomi,” said Temari. She turned to Shikane. “Got all your stuff?”

Shikane quickly checked his bag and pockets, and nodded. “Taki! Get your arse downstairs and say goodbye to your brother!” Temari bellowed up the stairs.

Takarazuka slouched down the stairs and mumbled, “See ya, Shikane.”

Shikane grinned. “Have fun in Suna! Don't forget to come back and visit some time!”

“Fun?” snorted Takarazuka. “I'm going to be training with the Puppet Squad, twenty-four hours a day, in a burning hot desert. I'll probably get sand in my shoes all the time and my clothes will stink of sweat and I won't get to have any catnaps. It's so troublesome.”

“Ah, shut it,” laughed Shikane. “You always say being a puppeteer is troublesome, but we all know you love it really. You're like the youngest chuunin on the Puppet Squad, Mum says. And you get to play with the dogs...”

“Hey! Shikane!” interrupted Chouyomi, poking her team mate in the ribs. “Are you coming to practice or what?”

Shikane took the hint. “Bye, Mum! Bye, sis!” he called, running after his departing team mates.

 _The third InoShikaChou formation,_ Temari thought. _Talk about keeping it in the family._

Takarazuka dropped a piece of bread into the toaster and made herself a cup of green tea. _She's so like her father,_ Temari thought. _She has his eyes, his ability to beat everyone at Go – except him, of course – even his ponytail. And his bloody laziness._ The only thing Takarazuka had not inherited was her father's jutsu. That had gone to Shikane, who, with his sandy hair, emerald-coloured eyes and aggressive, forthright way of speaking, was a younger and male version of his mother.

Although she had been born and raised in Sunagakure, Temari was amazed at how at home she felt in Konoha. The trees and cool breezes and hot springs were a welcome relief after twenty-seven years of living in that bloody desert, the quality of life was generally better, and the atmosphere of continuous tension in her home village was absent in Konoha. She missed her brothers, but the villagers were almost like another family to her. She understood now what all that Will Of Fire business was about. They were a tough bunch, the citizens of Konoha. So many losses in the last Great War, and yet they kept on battling till the end. So many jounin had fallen – her husband's sensei, Asuma, was only the first of many. Genma Shiranui, the Elders of Konoha, Yamato, Anko Mitarashi, Maito Gai, Kakashi Hatake, the Fifth Hokage herself – they had all fallen in battle. Kurenai Yuuhi, the aunt of Shikane's sensei, was one of the few who had survived, along with Baki, Temari's former sensei and an advisor to the Kazekage; Ibiki Morino, a tough veteran and torture specialist, who was still working as an examiner; Iruka Umino, one of the Academy's most-loved teachers and a great friend of the Hokage; Shizune, the Fifth Hokage's assistant and a top medical jounin; and several members of the Konoha clans, including – thank goodness – her father-in-law, Shikaku.

Kakashi's death, Temari recalled, had sent shockwaves through the village, as had the death of the Fifth Hokage. He had died protecting the Sixth Hokage, killed by the very same man who had previously murdered Jiraiya, and indeed, his death was said to be one of the catalysts in the Sixth Hokage's rise to power; the death of his sensei had filled him with so much rage and fearsome energy, it was as if the gods themselves were guiding him. He had single-handedly beaten the leader of those Akatsuki bastards in combat. Now, every year, just like her husband and his former team mates did with their late sensei Asuma, the Hokage and Sakura Haruno, his wife and former team mate, paid their respects to Kakashi's grave.

Temari looked over at her daughter, munching on a slice of toast. “Is that all you're going to eat, Taki?” she asked. “We've got three days' journey ahead of us. You're going to need energy. Have some fruit or some more toast or something.”

“I'm not hungry,” Takarazuka argued.

“Eat.”

Takarazuka saw the look in her mother's eyes, and decided not to argue. She put two more pieces of bread into the toaster, as Shikamaru entered the house. Temari kissed him. “So, how's Hokage-sama doing?” she asked. “Did you give Sakura the medicines?”

“Ah, he's fine,” Shikamaru replied, scratching his chin. “And yes, I did, and yes, before you ask, we've still got a week's leave, it's OK. He understands, it being Sand business and everything. Told me to say hi to Gaara-sama for him.” He raised an eyebrow. “Sometimes, when I talk to him, it's like we're ten years old again and in Iruka's class being shouted at. He's got Neji taking care of things while I'm away. So, when are we setting off?”

“Once the kid's finished her breakfast,” Temari said, aiming a pointed glance at Takarazuka. Takarazuka grunted and shoved green tea and toast into her mouth. Brushing the remaining crumbs off her face, she padded up the stairs to her bedroom. She flung open the door, breathing in the familiar scent of green tea and yellowing paper and sakura blossoms from outside her room, and began to gather her bundles together. One for clothes; one for sleeping gear; and lastly, Kitsune. Kankuro, her uncle and the jounin in charge of the Puppet Squad, had made it for her and presented her with it four years ago, when he'd decided that she really did have the potential to be a puppeteer. Plus, as he put it, “she's not going to bollocks up Karasu anymore”.

“So long, old childhood home,” she muttered to herself, and schlepped her bundles downstairs to where Shikamaru and Temari awaited her.

 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 

“ _Karakuri Engeki!_ ”

Takarazuka stood in the desert, her arms extended, palms facing forward, chakra strings emanating from each finger. The five tails of Kitsune hung in the warm air, ready to strike. Concentrating intensely on Kuroari, her uncle's puppet, she lowered her arms, crossing them in front of her.

“ _Kurohigi Kiki Ippatsu!_ ”

The five tails whizzed through the air, blades extended, towards the slots in Kuroari's body. _Thunkthunkthunkthunkthunk_. Four of them hit the slots, the last was a little off-centre, and slammed into the puppet's side.

“Idiot! Do that again!”

Sighing, Takarazuka pulled out the blades with her chakra strings, as Kankuro glared at her. They had been practising this jutsu together for what seemed like an eternity, although it had been only a few days. Each jounin in the Puppet Squad picked an individual chuunin to train with, and Kankuro had insisted on working with his niece; not because of blood ties, but because, in his opinion, she needed training more than anyone, she needed a kick up the arse, and who better to give her that kick than the man responsible for the Puppet Squad's resurrection?

The first time Takarazuka had complained about her uncle's harsh training, Kankuro had slapped her and told her that she had no fucking clue about anything. She learned very quickly that he did not tolerate laziness of any kind. However, the two of them had built up a working relationship, and she had come to grudgingly admire him. It was Kankuro who had chosen her name, after all, and it was also Kankuro who had noticed that she had potential as a puppeteer, back when the five-year-old Takarazuka had been spotted creating tiny chakra strings.

“She takes after her father,” Temari had said proudly. “The kid's definitely a genius in the making. She's already learned to play Shogi, she even beat Shika the other day...”

“Is that so?” Kankuro had replied. “A little strategist, eh? And she's got chakra manipulation abilities already, it seems. A good combination for a puppeteer. Any idea what kind of jutsu she'll specialise in?”

“Ninjutsu, I guess,” said Temari with a shrug. “I don't think she's the taijutsu kind, she's not aggressive or physical enough, and I can't see her being a genjutsu type either. Not if she takes after Shika.” A thought suddenly hit her. “She's good with her hands, Kankuro. She helped fix the toaster the other day. She's got this kind of...inbuilt ability to sense where things go.”

Kankuro stroked his chin thoughtfully. He was silent for a while. Then he spoke up.

“I'd like to train her in future, Temari-chan. If, as you can say, she can fix stuff, and she's apparently a genius, and she can make chakra strings like she's doing now, she could surpass me as a puppeteer one of these days. And another one in the family wouldn't hurt. It's not like there are many of us.”

Back in the present day, Takarazuka, sighing, raised her sweating arms, and the parts of Kitsune with them. The blades hung suspended in the air.

“ _Karakuri Engeki!_ ”

_Concentrate, girl, concentrate. The blades should be at the right angle to the slots...looks like it...now...arms down, palms in and crossed over your chest..._

“ _Kurohigi Kiki Ippatsu!_ ”

 _Thunkthunkthunkthunkthunk._ Four blades hit home. The fifth missed again. There was an evil expression on Kankuro's scarred and painted face. Takarazuka bit her lip.

Blades out, arms up, palms outwards, eyes on the position of the blades in relation to Kuroari's slots. _IcandothisIcandothisIcandothis._

“ _Karakuri Engeki!_ ”

 _Come on, Taki, old girl. Don't piss your uncle off._ A small stream of blood trickled down Takarazuka's lip. She winced.

“ _Kurohigi Kiki Ippatsu!_ ”

 _Thunkthunkthunkthunkthunk._ And another of the bloody blades missed.

Shit.

“Uncle Kankuro...” began Takarazuka. Kankuro held up his hand to stop her.

“Takarazuka,” he said, with menace in his voice. “How long have we been practising this jutsu now? A month, right? And yet, so far, you have failed to sink all five tails into Kuroari. An enemy inside him could survive that attack, the way you're going. So four blades have hit home, and he's bleeding, but what if just _one_ vital area is missed? What if he still has enough chakra, enough _blood_ , to smash his way out of Kuroari? Use your fucking head, girl. You can get four of the tails in there, why not all five? I thought I could pass on my jutsu to you, so you could have a couple of other jutsu in your arsenal besides your own. But now I'm beginning to wonder if you can hack it.”

 _You're pushing me too hard, Uncle Kankuro,_ Takarazuka wanted to say. But wisely, she kept her mouth shut.

“Again, please. And we are not going home until you get it right. Am I making myself clear?”

Takarazuka nodded.

Forty attempts later, she finally got it right, and as she swang her arms down and screamed, “ _Kurohigi Kiki Ippatsu!_ ” all five of the blades hit home. Kuroari stood with the five tails sticking out of its body; had a prisoner been inside it, blood would be streaming down its front.

Takarazuka was exhausted. But it was worth it, just to see her uncle give her the thumbs up.

Kankuro summoned the rest of the puppeteers, and called a halt to the training. “See you all tomorrow,” he said, as the squad packed their puppets into bundles. Takarazuka folded up Kitsune and wrapped it up.

Takarazuka and Kankuro said little to each other on their way home. She was too tired, and he was evidently lost in thought. He did that sometimes; it was to be expected, given the amount of pressure on him. Not only was he the head of the Puppet Squad, he was also a proctor at the Sunagakure Ninja Academy, and sat on the village council. Naturally, as the Kazekage's brother, he attracted a lot of attention anyway. The older generation knew about Kankuro's family and his troubled past.

As the pair approached the domed mud-brick house that the two Sabakuno brothers shared – the Kazekage had the top level and Kankuro, the bottom one - a black and white dog charged towards them in greeting. It was followed by Kiba Inuzuka, Takarazuka's third uncle, Kankuro's husband and an emigrant from Konoha.

“Evening, you two,” said Kiba, throwing himself on Kankuro like one of his beloved dogs. He gave Kankuro a kiss on the cheek and laid a restraining hand upon the dog's back. “How was training, Taki-chan? I see your uncle's not killed you yet.”

“Not quite, no,” said Takarazuka wryly.

“She finally did it, Kiba-kun,” interjected Kankuro with a grin. “She mastered the jutsu I've been teaching her. And about bloody time, too.” He turned to his niece. “I should be making you your own Kuroari. Now go and sit down. You've earned yourself a rest.”

Normally, Takarazuka helped her uncles prepare dinner. Kankuro had insisted that she contribute her share around the house, and another thing that she had had to learn quickly was that her uncle was not very tolerant of mess. Kiba's dogs, fortunately, were housetrained; Takarazuka was another matter.

As Kankuro began chopping vegetables while Kiba fed the dogs, Takarazuka collapsed onto the sofa and peeled off her sandals and the black bandana her uncle had insisted she wear, mainly to protect her neck from the heat of the sun, but also to act as camouflage. He himself wore a black hood, known as the 'cat hat' because, with its two points on top, it gave him the appearance of a human-cat hybrid. According to Kankuro, 'cat hats' was originally traditionally worn by puppeteers in the Bunraku school of theatre. He'd taken her to Bunraku plays in the past, for 'research purposes'.

Kiba called from the dining room that dinner was ready, and Takarazuka went to sit down with her uncles. They were having some kind of chicken katsu tonight, it seemed. She wolfed the food down; training had made her ravenous. Kiba was telling Kankuro about the latest news from Konoha; his former team mate, Shino Aburame, had become a father for the second time, and the baby was currently being turned into a human vessel for an army of insects, as was the Aburame clan's custom. “I think I'm the only one of the Rookie Nine who hasn't got a litter,” he said teasingly to Kankuro. Kankuro, who hated children – with the exception of his niece and nephew – grunted and chased a mushroom around his plate.

 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 

Late at night, as he spooned with Kankuro, his arms wrapped around his husband's thick waist, his now limp cock pressing slightly into the small of Kankuro's back, Kiba thought about Shino and his two children. The comment about Kiba being the only one of the Rookie Nine without children wasn't entirely true. The treacherous Sasuke Uchiha had never had children either; but then he had died years ago. None of Team Gai's team had had children either. Neither had Gaara, his brother-in-law.

And look at us all now, Kiba thought. Team 10 all married with kids. Shikamaru with my sister-in-law, Chouji with that girl who worked in the steak house, Ino with that weird Sai kid. His former team mates, also with children; Hinata had married someone from the branch family of the Hyuuga clan (although Hiashi had arranged it), and Shino had ended up with a woman he'd met in the ANBU. Tenten from Gai's team, now with Shizune. Oh, the scandal it had caused, but he'd still been relieved to know that someone else in Konoha understood how he felt. And Naruto Uzumaki, once the scapegoat of Konoha, was now Hokage, with Sakura Haruno at his side, and a son to boot.

But not everyone had ended up being paired off. Tenten's team mates, for one. Rock Lee had dedicated his life to taijutsu and becoming the strongest ninja in the village. The death of his beloved sensei had, it seemed, destroyed part of him forever. Lee's face when he'd received the news had stayed with Kiba since that day. Hinata's cousin Neji had never married either. He was, in Kiba's opinion, the most asexual creature he had ever come across, save his brother-in-law. Gaara had never married, never had children, never even had a partner. Kiba wasn't surprised. Kankuro had told him everything. Gaara was far too damaged.

And now Hinata was mentoring genin who needed extra help and specialising in espionage and surveillance, leaving her sister Hanabi to represent the main branch of the Hyuuga family in battle. Tenten and Lee were leaders in their fields of weapon summoning and taijutsu. Neji and Shikamaru were advisors to the Hokage; Ino, an interrogator and medic; Sai and Shino were in the ANBU; Temari had brought her wind jutsu to Konoha; Chouji was among one of the most feared and respected jounin for his incredible strength and courage, and he and Shikamaru and Tenten were all teachers at the Academy. Kurenai's son was one of the few practitioners of genjutsu in the village, and his cousin Konohamaru was another fine ninja from the Sarutobi clan, and his current head. They had survived. Some were scarred physically, others mentally. Shikamaru walked with a slight limp, while his father needed a cane; Neji had lost fingers; Chouji had an enormous scar on his stomach; Shizune was blind in one eye; Lee had Ninja Syndrome. But they were all still there in Konoha, repairing their lives, raising their families. Kiba missed them.

Kiba still had the occasional nightmare about the war. But he wasn't on his own any more; he had Kankuro by his side. When Kankuro was inside him, fucking him hard with Kiba's legs wrapped round his back, their bodies glistening with sweat, Kiba was at his happiest. He was no uke – he was perfectly happy to top, particularly when he was feeling horny and feral and had the urge to shove Kankuro up against the wall and ravage him until he came – but he loved the feeling of unity that he got when Kankuro's huge cock was in him and their bodies formed a whole. Almost like a sexual equivalent of Kiba's _Fang-over-Fang_ technique, but Kankuro in place of a dog. Just thinking about Kankuro filling him up, his hot breath on Kiba's neck while his beautiful hands grasped Kiba's own cock and pleasured him, would have made Kiba hard if he wasn't so damn spent.

 _My beautiful Kankuro,_ Kiba thought. _I don't know what I'd have done with my life if I hadn't met you._

 


	2. Bloodhound

   While Temari slept and Gaara sat on the roof of the Sand Siblings' house and stared into space, Kankuro lay on his bed and began to masturbate.

The heat of the day had made him horny. Even at times like this, when the harsh light of the moon painted the Sunagakure sands silver and the temperature of the desert dropped below zero, Kankuro's libido was not diminished.

He was thinking about that time when, a year and a half ago, he and his siblings had been summoned by the Fifth Hokage and sent to rescue a group of reasonably inexperienced Konoha genin who had gone off to find Sasuke Uchiha. The boy had run away from the village after an unwanted visit from his older brother Itachi, and Naruto Uzumaki, his former team mate, had been determined to track him down and bring him home. He'd been accompanied by genin from the Hyuuga, Inuzuka and Akimichi clans, and a young chuunin from the Nara clan. The Sand Siblings had turned up just in time to see the group from Konoha each facing a ninja from Otogakure. While Gaara and Temari had ended up helping that weird kid with the eyebrows and the Nara boy, Kankuro had found the Inuzuka kid and his dog, about to be stabbed to death. He had killed the enemy with the help of his two puppets; the enemy, a strange two-headed creature called Ukon, had been trapped inside Kuroari and impaled by Karasu's blades. _It served him right,_ Kankuro thought, _for underestimating me._ _Arrogant little shit. Plays with dollies, my arse._

The Inuzuka boy had remained on Kankuro's mind ever since. He could still recall the kid's face: scruffy, shaggy brown hair, a fang-shaped red clan tattoo on each cheek, little pointed fangs, feral glinting eyes like a wolf's. If he hadn't met the boy's mother afterwards, Kankuro would have returned to Sunagakure thinking the kid had been raised by wolves, possibly with only one human parent. And yet, the wild aspect was a characteristic that Kankuro found strangely attractive. It was as though the boy had tapped some kind of animal instinct deep within Kankuro's psyche.

What was his name? Ah, yes. Kiba. Kiba Inuzuka. And his dog, a little white puppy with a tuft of fur on his head, was called Akamaru, which was odd considering he wasn't actually red. He'd been tucked inside Kiba's jacket when the two had met.

Kankuro, his eyes closed, toyed with his cock and imagined what Kiba would look like naked. He imagined a slender, toned body, strong (but not overly muscled) arms, keen fingers, pert buttocks, firm thighs...a body that was just crying out to fuck and be fucked...

 _Stop it, Kankuro,_ he told himself. _The kid's probably the same age as Gaara._

But the image of Kiba remained in his head. Kankuro's hand movement grew quicker, as did his heartbeat, and lurid images of Kiba filled his mind. Kiba shoving him up against a tree and kissing him passionately while Ukon's blood trickled out of Kuroari in a steady red stream. Kiba lying invitingly on a bed in his boxer shorts, legs wide open. Kiba in a kimono, letting Kankuro slowly peel it off. Kiba and Kankuro rolling around in the sand, under a blazing hot sun...Kiba letting Kankuro rip his boxer shorts off...

Blood rushed to Kankuro's head. His hand frantically tugged at his cock. He began to masturbate with both hands. In his imagination, Kankuro was now mounting Kiba and thrusting into him, hard. Kiba was panting like a dog, as the puppeteer kissed his neck. Sweat poured from their bodies as they formed a writhing, squirming mass. Then the two of them came, letting out cries of ecstasy before dropping, exhausted, onto the sand.

At that moment, Kankuro could hold the orgasm in no longer, and he came messily all over his hand. He sank into the mattress as his eyes locked with the dead eyes of his puppets, hanging from the walls around his bed. _The play,_ Kankuro wanted to say to them, _has ended. You've been a lovely audience. Thank you and good night._ In fact, in the past, he'd treated his puppets as though they _were_ an audience, watching a one-man play about the male orgasm, starring Kankuro of the Desert as Himself.

In four days' time, he would be in Konoha. He hoped the Inuzuka boy would be there.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kiba Inuzuka stood in the corridor outside the Fifth Hokage's office, his faithful dog Akamaru at his side, and wondered why she had summoned him. He hoped it wasn't another bloody mission to the Land of Waves. He and his team mates, Hinata Hyuuga and Shino Aburame, had only just gotten back two days ago, and Kiba needed a break. He was still adjusting to having become a chuunin, along with Hinata and Chouji Akimichi from Team 10; Shino had been promoted to chuunin the year before, as had all three members of Maito Gai's team, Sakura Haruno from Team 7, and Chouji's team mate, Ino Yamanaka. At the same time that Kiba became a chuunin, Hinata's cousin Neji had recently been promoted to jounin, pleasantly surprising villagers who assumed that, as a branch family member, Neji would always be in Hinata's shadow. Neji, however, had proved them all wrong. Along with Shikamaru Nara – _Heaven knows,_ thought Kiba, _how that guy isn't a jounin yet_ – he had the reputation of being one of the geniuses of Konoha.

Kiba steeled himself, and knocked on the Hokage's door.

“Come in!” barked a voice from within.

Kiba and Akamaru obediently trotted into the Hokage's office. Tsunade was sitting at her desk, flanked by Sakura and Shizune, her assistant. Sakura smiled at the two, and went up to Akamaru, placing a hand on his head and stroking it. “Wow, Akamaru,” she said, “you're getting big.” Akamaru yipped in acknowledgement.

“Kiba,” said Tsunade, “I have a job for you.”

“What is it, ma'am?” asked Kiba.

Tsunade rifled through the papers on her desk, and eventually found what she was looking for: a message from Sunagakure.

“As you know,” she began, “a lot's been going on in the Sand Village. Gaara was recently made Kazekage; hopefully this will strengthen the alliance we have with them, as Gaara is a friend of Konoha. He has been forgiven for everything that happened with the Sound, since he saved Lee's life when you were all going after Sasuke, not to mention that he has promised to use his powers to protect Sunagakure from harm. He's aware of the debt he owes this village.”

Kiba nodded solemnly, but shifted from one foot to another. “Are you going to send me to Suna, ma'am?” he asked.

“I'm coming to that,” Tsunade replied. “Anyway, as you might recall, Gaara paid Konoha a visit last year during the Chuunin Exams, and he and his family are in the process of setting up a ninja academy in the Sand Village. They're planning to introduce an exam system similar to the one we have, and a similar curriculum as well. And to get an idea of what to teach and that sort of thing, they're sending a jounin over to observe the classes for a month. Your task is to look after the jounin, show them around the village and answer any questions they might have.”

Kiba was puzzled. “Why'd you pick _me?_ ”

Tsunade sighed impatiently. “Because, Kiba, you're a member of one of the village's established clans. You know this place like the back of your hand. You were recently promoted to chuunin, so I'm assuming you're not a complete idiot. The jounin in question is near your age. And I can't ask anyone else. Naruto is still training with Jiraiya and won't be back for a while yet. Team Gai are all unavailable at the moment. Shikamaru's got his hands full as it is. Chouji's training with his father. Sasuke...well, we all know about him. As for your team mates...I'm sorry, but frankly Hinata's too shy and I don't think she'd do a good job. And Shino...well...” She paused. Kiba sensed she was keeping something from him. Did this mysterious jounin have a history with the Aburame clan or something?

“And I can't go,” Sakura chimed in, “because I'm still doing my medical training. And I've got Ino to supervise while I'm at it. Sorry, Kiba.”

“So there you go,” Tsunade finished. “It's up to you, Kiba. Don't worry about putting the Sand nin up, his accommodation is all sorted. And by the way, you had better accept, as he's going to be here in...” She checked her watch. “...Half an hour.”

Akamaru looked at Kiba with expectation in his eyes, and thumped his tail on the ground.

Inwardly, Kiba sighed. Outwardly, he said, “OK, ma'am, I accept.”

“Good, good,” said Tsunade briskly. “You'd better get yourself off to the gates, so you can greet him when he gets here.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Half an hour later, Kiba was standing at the gates of Konoha, as Akamaru lay on the ground and ignored the flies buzzing around him. The dog's growth had rocketed, it seemed. Two years ago, Kiba had carried the little creature around in his jacket. Now, Akamaru was big enough to ride upon, and his bark was twice as loud. He was a useful asset to Team 8, with his sensitive nose and lightning reflexes.

Something caught Akamaru's eye; he leapt up and barked at Kiba. Kiba turned. “What is it, Akamaru?” He followed the dog's head as Akamaru looked towards the plain that lay between the village and the Forest of Death. A small black speck was approaching.

Kiba began to feel uneasy. The black speck grew bigger and began to take the shape of a human, albeit a human that seemed to have long pointy ears like an Alsatian's atop its head.

 _Fucking hell,_ Kiba thought with a start, _is it who I think it is?_

The figure was getting closer. Kiba saw that it had a couple of bundles strapped to its back, and his heart did a complicated gymnastic manouevre in his chest.

_It's him. It's the one who saved my life._

Akamaru began to bark again. Kiba found himself staring into the eyes of an older, heavy-set boy, who was dressed entirely in black and had purple Kabuki-style make-up painted on his face. It was slightly different from the pattern he'd had the last time they met; this time, he had a horizontal line running across his face from ear to ear, a diagonal line on each cheek, a triangle on his chin, and purple eyeshadow and lipstick. He was also wearing a black hood with cat-like ears, and one of his bundles was composed of three scrolls. Evidently he'd acquired another puppet since they last met.

“So, Kiba Inuzuka,” said Kankuro, bowing, “we meet again.”

“Kankuro!” gasped Kiba. He tried to regain his composure. “Welcome to Konoha. I've been asked by the Hokage to show you around and stuff.” He lowered his head and began to sniff Kankuro's body. He smelled of sawdust and sweat and damp grass. Kiba's nose followed the scent trail down the jounin's chest to his waist.

“What the fuck are you _doing?_ ” Kankuro yelled, backing off.

Kiba blushed. “Sorry,” he mumbled, “it's just I have this habit of sniffing people so that I can see for myself that they are who they say they are. We've got a great sense of smell, we Inuzuka, it comes from working with dogs, you tend to pick habits up from them...” He realised he was babbling, and shut up.

The Sunagakure ninja surveyed him coolly. “So what have you been up to? You've not been getting your arse kicked by two-headed nutters again?”

Akamaru barked at Kankuro's chutzpah. “No, actually,” said Kiba coldly, “I'm a chuunin now. We all are.” Kankuro raised an eyebrow at this, but said nothing. Kiba led him and Akamaru away from the gates and into the village.

“Congratulations on becoming a jounin, by the way,” Kiba blurted out. “Were you a chuunin last year?”

“Of course I was a bloody chuunin, you twit,” said Kankuro rudely. “Temari and me both. We got promoted last year, and we became jounin this year, and no, before you ask, it wasn't because of our little brother or anything.”

Kiba was stung. Kankuro was still as arseholish as ever, it seemed. The last time, he'd made a point of telling that Ukon bastard that the Konoha genin were a bunch of weaklings in comparison to those from Sunagakure. _Keep calm, Kiba,_ he thought. _Kankuro can't help the fact that he's an arrogant knobend._

Kankuro's eyes darted around, taking in the scenery before him. A cool breeze stroked his face. The abundance of trees, wild flowers and grass was certainly a change from being surrounded by sand, sand and more bloody sand – oh, and the occasional palm tree. The houses were built out of a different kind of brick; many were whitewashed or plastered. Kankuro's shoes were kicking up less dust than they did back home. The air smelled of ramen and smoke and the fresh scent of grass and flowers, perhaps because they had just passed the Yamanaka family's flower shop. Although it was relatively quiet in Konoha, the streets were still busy and alive, under the watchful eyes of the five Hokages' faces carved into the side of the mountain overlooking Konoha. _Not bad,_ Kankuro thought.

Kiba interrupted Kankuro's reverie by asking him where he was staying. “It's a small hotel near the onsen,” the jounin replied. “I think it's called the Little Green Leaf or something, you know it?”

Kiba scratched his head. “Umm...sort of. I know where the onsen is, it's about ten minutes' walk from my house,” he ventured.

“OK, that'll do,” Kankuro said. “Take me there and I'll drop my stuff off. I don't think I'll be needing to carry my puppets around for the time being, unless you lot get invaded again and you need my help.” He smiled sweetly at Kiba.

Gritting his teeth, the younger ninja escorted his guest to the onsen. He sniffed the air for signs of anything that might smell like a hotel. Eventually, as he inclined his sensitive nose south-eastwards, he caught the scent of many people mixed together, fresh linen, laundry, some kind of meat roasting. His animal instinct told him it was a hotel, and he led Kankuro in the direction of the smell. Sure enough, Kiba was right; the Little Green Leaf Hotel was the source of the scent. It was a small but adequate-looking hotel, made of wood, with seemingly only one floor, and a small courtyard.

“So,” said Kankuro, “where's the Academy in relation to this place? Is it far?”

“About half an hour, I'd say,” replied Kiba. “You go past the onsen, turn left, keep walking for about five minutes, then turn right, and you're on the main street. I think it's the third street on your left you need to take...you'll find it, you can't miss it.”

“No need to be giving me directions,” said Kankuro. “You're accompanying me, remember? Are you meeting me here, or do I have to come to your house?”

“I'll meet you here,” Kiba answered. “It makes sense, since I know the village and you don't.”

“What time?”

“Seven OK for you?”

“Yeah,” Kankuro replied. “I'll be up by then. I don't sleep too well away from home.”

Kiba nearly said something, but decided not to. He barely knew the guy. Akamaru, meanwhile, cocked his leg against a fence post. Kankuro watched him, and began to search for his pass from the Kazekage. After rummaging through the bag containing clothes, face paint and toiletries, he found it. “So,” he said briskly. “See you tomorrow, then.” And with that, he turned away from Kiba and his dog, and walked towards the hotel.

Once Kankuro was out of earshot, Kiba muttered to Akamaru, “He's still an arsehole. I can see the next month's going to be hell.”

“Arf arf arrr,” agreed Akamaru.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

However, as Kankuro's stay in Konoha progressed, Kiba found that his mind was beginning to change. By the third week, he and the Sunagakure jounin had began to bond. The more they interacted, the more Kiba discovered that he and Kankuro had a fair amount in common; for instance, they were both very protective of those close to them (Akamaru and Gaara, respectively) and loyal to their villages. They both had a playful, slightly rough streak, and a similar sense of humour. They both had older sisters who they loved but sometimes considered a pain in the arse. Kankuro thought Temari was too bossy; Kiba said the same thing about Hana. They both wanted the same amount of recognition for their unique styles of fighting; wished that Naruto would 'turn the volume down', that Shino would lighten up, and that the Uchiha traitor would be found and punished (Kankuro made it clear that if someone from Sunagakure had behaved in the way Sasuke did, they would be hunted down and killed). They agreed on most music and some books, disagreed on other forms of entertainment (Kankuro, unsurprisingly, liked Kabuki and Bunraku plays, while Kiba couldn't be bothered sitting through them; on the other hand, Kankuro wasn't particularly interested in television, unlike Kiba), and considered themselves on the political right wing of their respective villages.

Kiba had also accompanied Kankuro to the Academy a few times, to make sure he was getting on well, and was surprised to discover that behind his boorish exterior, Kankuro was a considerate and intelligent jounin. Despite his claim to hate 'brats', he was surprisingly gentle with some of the more timid genin, trying to put them at ease by joking around, and guiding them with their footwork and shuriken throwing. He had also demonstrated his puppet techniques to them, as a pointer to the sort of techniques used in Sunagakure. Kiba was impressed; he'd worried that the jounin was going to fall out with most of the instructors, and confirm inbuilt Konoha prejudices about Sunagakure citizens.

On Kankuro's last night in Konoha, Kiba went to visit him at his hotel and offered to take him to the local hot spring; he knew from previous conversations that Kankuro had wanted to visit it, but often forgot to due to his commitment at the Academy. Living in a desert, it was a given that Kankuro had no access to hot springs.

While Akamaru lay down outside the entrace to the onsen, Kiba changed first, lowered himself into the hot water, and waited for Kankuro to appear. He'd never seen him without his cat hat and facepaint, and wondered what he looked like under it. _Will I recognise him?_ he wondered.

He was up to his neck in the water when a tall, stocky boy appeared and lowered himself into the spring. He had spiky brown hair similar to Kiba's, albeit less wild-looking, small, slightly slanted dark eyes, and a prominent nose. _He could do with losing a bit of weight,_ Kiba thought. The boy had a bit of a gut developing. But his shoulders were broad and muscular, his arms looked strong, and he had surprisingly long and slender fingers. He eased himself gingerly into the water

“Alright?” said the older boy. Kiba stared at him. “Do I know you?” he asked. Then something clicked, and he smacked his head in annoyance. He realised who it was.

“It's me, you ingrate,” said Kankuro rudely, confirming Kiba's suspicions. “I guess you've never seen me without my war paint on, have you?”

Kiba blushed, and clamped his mouth shut, lest his jaw drop in shock. Kankuro, minus hat and make-up, was absolutely bloody gorgeous. He was no pretty boy, that much was clear – but there was something undeniably sexy about him. Kiba's stomach began to churn. He was feeling something he didn't want to feel...and yet, he didn't want to suppress the feeling either.

“Ahhhhh,” sighed Kankuro, as the warmth enveloped his body, “this is good.” He closed his eyes and sank into the water. Rude thoughts began to fill Kiba's head. He tried to banish them by thinking of Shino in a bikini, Orochimaru's scaly tongue, Naruto dancing. But the image of Kankuro's naked body glistening with sweat would not budge from his head.

Kiba inched closer to Kankuro, till he was standing next to him. The water came up to Kankuro's shoulders. Little beads of sweat were forming on his face. Kiba realised, with a shock, that he had a massive erection.

_Oh, fucking HELL. Shino in a bikini. Shino in a bikini._

“So...you had a good time in Konoha?” he offered, focusing directly on Kankuro's large nose.

“Yeah,” Kankuro replied, smiling. “I'm looking forward to reporting back to the others. That pineapple-headed kid's sensei is cool. I sat in on one of his classes earlier. You've got a good system going here...even if you are weak.”

A low growl rose in Kiba's throat. “Will you stop with the insulting Konoha?” he blurted out.

“You're one to talk,” retorted Kankuro. “Don't think I've not heard the jokes. 'You know you're from Suna when your parents met at a family reunion'. 'How does a Suna mum prove her love for her son? She swallows'.” He laughed harshly. “You might think we're all fucking our sisters but at least we Suna nin aren't weaklings.”

“And yet,” countered Kiba, “it was one of our lot that beat your bloody brother when he went mad.”

Kankuro's face darkened. “Don't you talk about Gaara like that. And who was it rescued you from the two-headed guy?”

“Oh, don't fucking rub it in,” sighed Kiba. He grinned, baring his fangs. “I don't want to have this conversation. I've half a mind to push your head under the spring.”

“Ooooh,” said Kankuro, his voice rising an octave. “I'm so _scared._ ”

Kiba lunged at Kankuro with a roar, knocking him over and submerging him. Kankuro shoved Kiba off, grabbed him by the shoulders and pushed him under the water. Kiba emerged, shook his head like a dog, and lunged at Kankuro, grabbing him round the waist and pinning his arms to his sides. While attempting to pull the jounin down into the depths, Kiba lost his balance and the two nin landed on the bottom of the hot spring, Kiba on top of Kankuro. Kiba let go, and the two of them broke the surface, gasping for air.

“You little shit,” breathed Kankuro, and shoved Kiba's head under the water again. Kiba forced himself upwards, and found himself standing almost nose-to-nose with Kankuro. The jounin's lips curved upwards, and Kiba also found himself smiling. The two moved closer. Their noses were touching...so were their mouths...and suddenly, Kiba found himself kissing Kankuro, his arms wrapped around the jounin's waist, Kankuro's arms round his shoulders, his erection pressing into Kankuro's thigh.

It seemed as though time had stopped. Kiba, his eyes closed, touched his tongue against Kankuro's tongue, tasting his breath, exploring his mouth. His arms began to wander unless they were almost touching Kankuro's arse. He felt Kankuro's hand stroking his hair, and felt his hard cock against his belly.

 _I can't believe this is happening,_ Kiba thought. _I should stop him. But I don't want to. I've never been kissed like this before._

Kankuro's arms loosened their hold around Kiba's shoulders, and he kissed Kiba gently on the lips. The two boys stared at each other.

“Kankuro,” the chuunin began, “I...”

Kankuro placed his finger on Kiba's lips and said, “Shhh.”

Kiba realised that both of them were still hard. And, moreover, that he was feeling incredibly horny.

Kankuro asked the question for him: “You want to come back to the hotel with me?”

Kiba nodded. Words literally failed him.

“Great,” said Kankuro briskly. “Let's get changed. I don't want us getting arrested.”

The two ninja dressed, and Kiba called Akamaru, who came padding round the corner of the entrance. Kankuro looked at the big dog, and warned Kiba that the hotel didn't allow animals. “That's OK,” Kiba replied, “he can sleep outside. That OK with you, Akamaru?”

Akamaru whined and looked pleadingly at Kiba. “Sorry, boy,” Kiba said apologetically, “you can't come in with us.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

In Kankuro's hotel room, which was compact, clean and had an ensuite shower, Kiba stretched himself out on the bed besides Kankuro. Lying on their sides, the pair kissed again. Kankuro's puppeteer's hands wandered up and down Kiba's slender body, through his hair, under his t-shirt, and into his trousers, where they began to stroke Kiba's cock. Kiba winced slightly.

The last person he'd had sex with was some girl whose name he couldn't remember. She wasn't from any of the established clans (imagine if she'd been an Aburame! What would Shino have said?); she was just an ordinary village girl. It had been after the Chuunin exams, and both he and Chouji had gone out on the pull to celebrate. Hinata hadn't joined them; her father would not let her. Both Kiba and Chouji had pulled that night. In fact, Chouji had pulled two girls. They were dark horses, those Akimichis. Kiba, meanwhile, had been drunk and invited the girl back to his house, as his mum and sister were out at the time, and they'd had rather frantic and strangely anticlimactic sex on his mum's bed. She was, if Kiba recalled correctly, the second girl he'd done it with. He'd never done it with a man before.

“Kiba,” Kankuro said quietly. “I want you.”

It was as though Kankuro had pulled a trigger. The two boys pulled their shoes off, and began to tear at each other's clothing. Kiba yanked the jounin's top off, while Kankuro undid Kiba's trousers and edged them down, over his hips and arse and down his legs. Kiba debagged Kankuro. They lay there in their boxer shorts, paused for a couple of seconds, and then Kankuro tore off his boxers, before grabbing the waistband of Kiba's own pair and yanking them off. Both of them lay, stark naked, on the bed.

Kankuro rummaged in one of his bundles, and produced a pack of condoms and a sachet of lube. “Good thing I brought these, eh?” he grinned. Tearing the wrapper open with his teeth, he put a condom on, and began to smear lube on his fingers. Kiba's jaw dropped.

“Have you ever taken it up the arse before?” Kankuro asked. Kiba shook his head and replied, “I've had anal sex before, but I've never been on the receiving end.” He hoped Kankuro wouldn't ask him who with. The answer was so shameful he didn't want to tell anyone.

“Would you like to try it?”

“OK,” Kiba said, but there was a touch of nervousness in his voice. “I'm a bit scared though. It's kind of...well, the only time anyone stuck anything up there was when I was being tested by a medic-nin a while back. And it hurt.”

“Hmmm,” Kankuro frowned. Then he laughed. “Call yourself a ninja? You should be used to pain, kid. I'm sure you've dealt with worse than some guy trying to fuck you. Don't worry, I'll try and be gentle with you. I know it'll probably feel a bit weird at first. Here, let me get you in the mood...” He knelt down and took the tip of Kiba's erect cock in his mouth, and began to suck.

Kiba felt strangely happy, and felt himself grow harder as Kankuro's lips moved further down his cock. For some reason, he found himself thanking the gods that Kankuro had taken his lipstick off first. The thought of his penis being smeared with purple did not appeal... ”Ahhh,” Kiba gasped as Kankuro's sucking intensified. Most of his cock was in the puppeteer's mouth now, being stimulated by his lips and tongue. Kiba felt something warm beginning to grow inside him. A lotus was slowly blooming inside his groin, and its hot petals were beginning to open...

Then Kankuro stopped.

“Why did you do that?” moaned Kiba in frustration.

“I don't want you to come just yet,” said Kankuro, with a wicked smile. “Now, roll over onto your stomach.”

Kiba swung his legs onto the bed, lay down, and rolled over onto his belly. He rested his head on his arms, and got a small shock when he felt Kankuro's wet, slimy index finger gently wriggle its way into his anus. His erection went down a little. It was a strange, mildly unpleasant feeling, as if he were being examined by a medic-nin, but he knew Kankuro wasn't trying to hurt him, and tried to relax as best he could.

Kankuro inserted another finger into Kiba's anus, moving them gently back and forth, taking care not to scratch Kiba or push too hard. Kiba moaned.

“Shit,” said Kankuro, worried. “Am I hurting you?”

Kiba shook his head with a muffled “no, no” and motioned for Kankuro to keep doing whatever he was doing down there. Kankuro continued the stroking motion with his fingers, softly teasing the inside of Kiba's anus, and then inserted a third finger. Kiba, meanwhile, made himself relax, and was beginning to enjoy the sensation of those long thin fingers inside him. Certainly, it was a weird place to finger someone, and not a particularly sexy place at that, but it made a change from a hand job. He began to feel less tense.

_Is this what it feels like when dogs mate? Is this how a bitch feels when her mate mounts her?_

“Get ready,” Kankuro breathed. He climbed onto the bed and, kneeling on it behind Kiba, gently parted the chuunin's buttocks, before slipping inside him. Kiba arched his back with a yelp.

“Relax,” hissed Kankuro, stroking Kiba's back.

Kiba tried to relax and ignore the pain. Kankuro continued to thrust into him, his body gently swaying back and forth. He felt excited and happy. He was going to teach this handsome Konoha kid a thing or two before he went back to Sunagakure. It had been a long time since he'd had sex, not counting those marathons with his puppets, and he realised how much he'd missed it, the feeling of his body moving in time with someone else's, his cock inside them, slowly growing harder and harder, bigger and bigger.

For Kankuro, it was always better with men. He'd tried it with women, including one of Temari's friends and one of Gaara's whores, but it just wasn't the same somehow. Sex with a man was rougher, hotter, more exciting. Almost like being in battle, but without the pain and the risk of death (Kankuro was always careful; one had to be, with the amount of STDs going around in Sunagakure.)

 _So this is what sex with another male feels like,_ thought Kiba. _My first same-sex shag, and with a Suna ninja, of higher rank than me, no less. It's like something out of one of Jiraiya's dirty books._

Kiba began to move in time to the rhythm set by Kankuro, arching his back and feeling Kankuro sliding back and forth inside him. He had a sudden urge to bark, to howl at the moon and join the chorus of copulating dogs everywhere. Kankuro's thrusts grew stronger, faster, until he was fairly slamming into Kiba; however, the dog-nin was too excited to care about the pain, and enjoyed it in some strange, masochistic way. It was a double-edged pain, a pain that Kiba wished would carry on.

_This is good...I've never been fucked like this before. Yes. Yes. Oh my gods...oh my gods...he's good...I think I'm going to come...no...not yet. Hold it in, Inuzuka._

“I...I'm gonna...shit! I...” gasped Kankuro. “I...I...ah...ah...” He felt like a bottle of Coke, being shaken so rapidly that when the top came off the contents would spill out in every direction, in a great flood of bubbles and fluid...

“Oooaaahhhhhhhh!” Kankuro moaned, and threw his head back, before collapsing on top of the chuunin. Kiba was pressed into the bed, the now spent puppeteer lying heavy on his back. Extracting himself from Kankuro, Kiba rolled onto his side and faced the jounin, who was smiling blissfully as cum trickled down his thigh.

Kiba felt the canine side of him begin to conquer his body. Roughly pulling Kankuro to him, he shoved his tongue down the older boy's throat and kissed him fiercely, almost violently, pawing at his back.

Kiba felt the growl that had been rising in his throat force its way out of his mouth.

“More.”

Kankuro looked dazedly at him.

“I want to be the dog now.”

Before Kankuro could say anything, Kiba was on top of him and inside him. He thrusted for all he was worth, a fierce snarl etched upon his face, fangs bared. Kankuro was his bitch, and it was mating season. He was going to fuck that Sand bastard's brains out, fuck him raw. Kankuro was going to have difficulty walking back to Suna by the time Kiba had finished with him.

Kankuro began to moan. Instinctively, Kiba clamped his hand over Kankuro's mouth, wishing he had some kind of gag. He felt the jounin's hot breath puffing onto his hand, covering it in vapour. Harder, harder, his hips slamming into Kankuro's back, Kiba fucked the jounin. The lotus bloomed again, its petals reaching out to touch the sun, and Kiba came in a wave of bliss. Exhausted, he flopped down onto Kankuro, his cheek brushing against the jounin's tangled hair.

“Mmmmm,” came a muffled noise behind Kiba's hand. Kiba stopped gagging Kankuro and rolled onto his side. A scratching sounded at the door.

“Akamaru?” Kiba whispered. A soft bark answered him.

“How did he get in here?” Kankuro asked, his eyes widening.

Kiba smiled. “Don't underestimate Akamaru,” he said. “He's got an amazing sense of smell. He probably smelled us and followed the scent.” He got up and let the dog in, putting his finger to his lips to warn Akamaru to be quiet.

Akamaru settled himself on the floor, his head between his paws, while Kiba and Kankuro lay on the bed, wrapped in each other's arms. Kankuro stroked Kiba's hair, while Kiba buried his head in the crook of Kankuro's neck.

 _I don't want this moment to end_ , Kankuro thought. _I don't want to go back to Sunagakure tomorrow._ He was surprised at himself for this sudden thought; he'd always been somewhat jaded towards love, believing that falling in love with someone else was too risky. Especially if they were a fellow ninja. For all he knew, he could be killed on the way home by bandits or missing-nin or people with a grudge against Gaara and his family.

Or Kiba could be dead next week.

 _Don't be so morbid_ , Kankuro scolded himself. _And stop worrying. You've had your sex now._

And yet...he felt something for this weird boy who was half-human and half-savage animal. Holding Kiba tightly in his arms like a well-worn teddy bear, he wanted to protect him. To sic Karasu and Kuroari on any would-be attackers while he and Kiba were safely hidden inside Sanshuou, Kankuro's new battle puppet-cum-three-man shelter.

He had saved Kiba's life before, and would do so again if he had to. And not just so he could feel that cock inside him again.

_What am I turning into?_

Baki-sensei had told him in the past that he was too hot-blooded and needed to calm down, to keep a cool head in battle instead of blowing a fuse at all and sundry. A good ninja should never let his emotions rule him. After all, Uncle Yasha did, willingly blowing himself up in order to kill the then seven-year-old Gaara, because he couldn't bear to look at the child's face and be reminded of his dead sister, the Sand Siblings' mother.

_For fuck's sake, Kankuro, you're getting soft in your old age._

Kiba interrupted the jounin's train of thought by twisting his head towards the bedside clock. “We'd better be getting off to sleep soon,” he said. “You've got three days' journey ahead of you tomorrow, remember?”

The two boys untangled themselves and heaved themselves up off the bed. Kankuro went off to have a shower, while Kiba switched on the small lamp above the bed, and went over to turn the main light off. The room became bathed in darkness, illuminated only by an eerie glow. He waited for Kankuro to finish washing himself. When Kankuro emerged and dried himself off, Kiba took his turn. Standing under the hot water, he felt sweat and cum begin to pour off his skin. He leaned against the tiled wall of the shower and gave a contented sigh.

When he stepped out of the shower, shaking his head like a dog and giving his body a quick rub with the towel, Kankuro was lying in bed with his head resting on his arms, staring up at the ceiling. He turned and smiled at Kiba.

“Shall we call it a night?” he asked.

Kiba yawned. “I guess so.” He climbed into bed and switched off the lamp.

“Night, mate.”

“Night.”

And Kiba fell asleep with his head leaning on Kankuro's chest.

 

“Thanks for looking after me, Kiba,” Kankuro smiled as he, Kiba and Akamaru stood at the village gate.

“Heh, it was nothing,” said Kiba with a dopey grin. “Glad you enjoyed it.”

“It makes a change from all that bloody sand,” Kankuro said with a laugh. “Anyway. Ta-ra.”

“Bye!”

Kankuro went on his way, turning his head briefly to smile at Kiba for one last time. Kiba stood and watched until the jounin became a small black speck again, and then disappeared into the woods.

He could have sworn Kankuro had winked at him.

“Akamaru,” said Kiba quietly. “I think I'm in love.”

The dog barked, and Kiba saw Hinata and Shino standing a few feet away, waving to him. He turned and walked towards them.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

A few months later, after Kankuro returned to his home village, Kiba was walking Akamaru through Konoha when his nose was assaulted by a strange scent. It smelt salty and strangely musky, and unlocked memories in Kiba's head. Specifically, he was thinking of Kankuro and recalling his distinct scent. When they'd had sex, it had smelled something like this...except the scent seemed to be half male and half female.

 _Someone,_ Kiba thought, _is having sex out here. I can smell it._

Kiba followed the scent and noticed it was getting stronger as he passed the park where the Nara clan kept deer. It seemed to be coming from one tree in particular. Although Kiba was forbidden to enter the park – only the Nara clan were allowed in there – he nevertheless walked steathily through the entrance, determined to track down the scent. His ears picked up the sound of heavy breathing. It seemed to be coming from his left.

Kiba crouched down behind a nearby bush, and two figures caught his eye. A tall, slender figure, with another one behind it. He inched forward, keeping his breath as soft as possible. Akamaru did the same.

One of the figures – the one standing with its back to Kiba, its arse seemingly moving back and forth - became clearer. It was wearing a flak jacket; evidently it was a chuunin or a jounin. The sex of the figure was uncertain, as its dark hair was pulled up into a spiky high ponytail, giving its head the appearance of a pineapple. Over its shoulder, Kiba could make out the other figure, who was being pinned against the tree. Its legs and arms were respectively wrapped around the dark-haired one's back and neck. Kiba could make out dark blonde hair, a forehead protector, black skirt hitched up around its – _her_ – knees.

Kiba realised with a shock who the dark-haired figure was; only one chuunin he knew wore his hair like that. And this was the Nara deer park after all.

_Shikamaru._

With another shock, he realised that the blonde female looked familiar. He'd met her after the Sand Siblings had come to the rescue of Shikamaru and his team, and Kiba, Naruto, Chouji and Neji had all been discharged. She and Shikamaru had exchanged words. She was a bossy girl, with her hair in four short tails and a big fan on her back...even then she'd seemed interested in Shikamaru...

Kiba twigged. It was Temari. Kankuro's sister.

 _I am in the Nara deer park,_ thought Kiba, _and I am watching_ _Shikamaru have sex with Kankuro's sister, up against a tree. Fuck. I shouldn't be here._

Realising that Temari would spot them if they weren't careful, Kiba and Akamaru fled quickly and quietly. Kiba squatted down, catching his breath.

He remembered that night with Kankuro, and wondered how he was doing.

_Does he know about this?_

“I miss him,” he whispered into Akamaru's ear. The dog barked softly in sympathy, and Kiba buried his head in Akamaru's fur.


	3. Rottweiler

   “ _Byakugan!_ ”

Hinata Hyuuga activated the pale, pupil-less eyes that were the bloodline limit of her clan. She saw through trees and rocks as if they were made of glass, searching for her team's targets. Her vision shot forward rapidly like lightning. Eventually she spotted them, fleeing through the trees a good few miles ahead.

“I-I-I can see them,” she cried out to her team mates. “Th-they're in the d-d-distance.”

Kiba's sensitive nose twitched, and the scent of the Amegakure ninja that he and his team mates were pursuing penetrated his nostrils. They were beginning to gain ground; the gap was closing. He was beginning to tire ever so slightly, but he would have rather chewed off his own leg than admitted weakness in front of Shino Aburame, who had appointed himself the de jure leader of Team 8.

They were running and jumping effortlessly through the trees of the Forest of Death, leaping from one branch to another, Shino's bugs circling around them. Small branches and leaves whipped at Kiba's face and brushed his hair as he sped towards the small group of enemies.

He hoped his mother and sister were alright back in Konoha, and wished that he and his team mates could have stayed behind to aid the other ninjas of Konoha and Sunagakure. Even with two villages and their respective Kages fighting together, the invading Amegakure and Mist ninja, plus their Akatsuki allies, were proving to be more than a match for the alliance. An hour or two earlier, a group of renegade ninja had fled into the Forest of Death, and, as the tracking team, Kiba, Shino, Akamaru and Hinata had been sent to hunt them down and kill them. Every chuunin and jounin in Konoha had been instructed not to hold back, not to underestimate their opponents, and not to get complacent.

“These Akatsuki bastards,” the Fifth Hokage had warned them at the pre-invasion briefing, “will stop at nothing until the village is razed to the ground, with no survivors. Many of you may remember Orochimaru's invasion. Recall the amount of damage caused to the village, the casualties on our side. I may not have been there, but I know what happened. And as some of you will know, these people are tougher than Orochimaru. They are S-ranked criminals with powerful ties. They killed Jiraiya.” Naruto Uzumaki, the only genin in the room, bowed his head. “They killed Asuma.” Here, Shikamaru Nara's eyes filled with tears. “They nearly killed the current Kazekage too. And don't forget that they have eight tailed beasts on their side...which brings me to my next point.” She focused on Naruto. “Naruto here must be protected at all costs. We cannot allow them to capture him. I am sure that you are all aware that this boy is the Jinchuriki for the Kyuubi, the most powerful tailed beast in existence. If he is captured and the Kyuubi extracted from him, it will spell disaster. That must not, on any accounts, be allowed to happen. Do I make myself clear?”

The assembled chunin and jounin nodded.

“Granny Tsunade!” interrupted Naruto.

“Naruto, please,” said his squad captain, Kakashi Hatake. “This is not the time.”

Ignoring Kakashi, Naruto continued: “So what's going to happen to me? Am I going to be under protection or something? Can't I fight too? I want to avenge Jiraiya's death, damn it! I want to make those bastards pay for what they did to him!”

“Calm down, Naruto,” said Kakashi sternly, laying a hand on the boy's shoulder.

“You'll be protected, of course,” was Tsunade's response. “The Toad Sage has promised to look after you. He's going to take you to the mountains and train with you there. We can't have you in the village, Naruto! It's too risky for all of us!”

“But...” Naruto appealed. Tsunade held up her hand. “That's it, Naruto. I am the Hokage, and what I say, goes.” She fixed her gaze on the rest of the people in the room. A deathly silence fell.

“This will be Konoha's darkest hour. A new Ninja War will begin. Everyone who can fight will be needed. Every clan, every chuunin, every jounin and medic and special jounin. Remember the Will of Fire, and the Hokages who sacrificed themselves for this village. Remember the Third, who died to save this village from Orochimaru. Remember the Fourth, who gave his own life to stop the Kyuubi. I too intend to lay down my life for Konoha if I have to. I told Orochimaru that, and I do not go back on my word. Now you are dismissed. Go and prepare for the invasion. Sakura, Ino, Shizune and Naruto, you all stay here.”

The chuunin and jounin – with the exception of the aforementioned medical ninja – left the room. The corridors of Konoha's central building echoed with the chatter of the men and women bound by duty to protect their village.

“I h-h-hope N-N-Naruto-kun will be alright,” murmured Hinata to Shino.

“Thank the gods we have Gaara-sama on our side,” said Rock Lee to Tenten, one of his team mates. “A formidable ally indeed.”

“If it's a fight they want,” declared Shikaku Nara, father of Shikamaru, “we'll be ready for them.”

“Damn right we will,” agreed Chouza Akimichi, as his son Chouji polished off the rest of his crisps. “We dealt with Orochimaru and his mob. We'll deal with these Akatsuki bastards too.”

Kiba laid a hand on Akamaru and ruffled his fur. “I'll protect you no matter what happens, Akamaru,” he whispered.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Confronted by two of the Amegakure ninja he and his team had been pursuing, Kiba remembered Tsunade's words. He bit his lip and made the hand seals needed for his signature move.

“ _Juujin Bunshin!_ ” he roared. Akamaru yelped, and two Kibas stood defiantly before the Amegakure ninja. Akamaru-Kiba leapt onto the real Kiba's back.

“ _Gatsuuga!_ ”

Boy and dog-boy whirled through the air, a dark grey spinning blur. The Amegakure ninja dodged out of the way as Kiba and Akamaru piledrived their way into the ground. Kiba mentally kicked himself, remembering that this technique had failed against that guy from Akatsuki -

Kiba threw himself to the side just in time for his leg to be grazed by a flying kunai. _This is no time for flashbacks,_ Kiba scolded himself.

_Think._

Blood pounded in his ears and at his temples, the beat of his heart like a deathly tremor within his body. He did a quick body flicker into the undergrowth. Akamaru followed suit.

“Where is he?”

_Where the fuck are Shino and Hinata?_

Akamaru's heavy breathing sounded like a roar to Kiba's tense, terrified ears.

One of the Amegakure ninja appeared and sliced at Kiba's face. He felt a warm trickle of blood down his cheek as the Amegakure ninja grabbed him by the throat, preparing to slit it. Kiba grabbed the ninja's arm, cursing himself.

_Shit._

_What would a dog do?_

Akamaru leapt out of the bush with a growl, and pissed in the Amegakure ninja's eyes. The first Amegakure ninja let out a cry of pain as the acidic urine temporarily blinded him, clawing at his face, while the second Amegakure ninja hesitated, unsure how to react at the seemingly ridiculous jutsu. “Good boy, Akamaru,” said Kiba under his breath.

He was rewarded by a searing pain shooting through his leg as Akamaru sunk his teeth in. The dog was angry with his owner for letting his guard down. Kiba nodded curtly, and shouted, “ _Jinjuu Konbi Henge Sotoro!_ ”

Boy and dog became one, a huge two-headed snarling beast, saliva dripping in a steady stream from its snarling jaws. Kiba and Akamaru sprung at the second Amegakure ninja, and Akamaru picked him up in his jaws, sinking his fangs into his chest. The ninja screamed with agony as Akamaru's teeth met within his body. Blood dripped down Akamaru's chin, and he shook his head rapidly, spraying blood everywhere. The ninja's left arm came off, the tendons and bones severed by Akamaru's teeth, and went flying into the undergrowth.

While Akamaru's head played with his new chew toy, Kiba lunged at the first Amegakure ninja, still blinded by Akamaru's piss, and seized him in his claws, ripping chunks of flesh away. He would show these bastards no mercy.They were going to discover what it felt like to be a piece of meat in the clutches of a hungry dog.

 _Kankuro would be proud of me,_ thought Kiba, and immediately he felt like an idiot for thinking of the Sand jounin during battle. He tore off the first Amegakure ninja's head, and changed back into his human form.

“Good work,” Kiba panted, stroking the head of his exhausted dog. He began to sniff the air for any hints of Shino or Hinata. He hadn't seen a single bug, a sign that Shino was seriously in trouble. Normally, Shino would have sent his bugs to find Kiba. Perhaps he had been captured along with Hinata.

Perhaps both of them were lying unconscious somewhere.

Or even dead.

Akamaru placed his nose to the ground, and began to yelp, sensing an imminent danger. He had smelled something disturbing. Kiba sensed it too. The air seemed somehow heavier, and strangely sweet despite the stench of blood emanating from his and Akamaru's victims.

“What the...” Kiba began, and was cut off when poison gas began to fill his nose and mouth. His eyes began to water, as the ground appeared to give way. The trees appeared to be reaching out to touch him and rip him limb from limb, tearing off an arm, a leg, his head...peeling off his skin...tearing tiny little holes into his body, turning him into a human colander. The grass was also conspiring against him, reaching up to crush his throat, snap his bones, fill his mouth and nose and choke him.

The sky turned black. The grass was wrapping itself around Kiba's feet, creeping up his legs and entwining itself around him, like thin green snakes. Now it was wrapping itself around his waist, now his arms, across his chest...and it was pulling itself tighter and tighter. His breath came in frantic little gasps.

A tree root wormed its way out of the ground and curled its way upwards until it was on a level with Kiba's face. It paused, tantilisingly offering itself to him, then shot out with no warning and wrapped itself around his neck.

Kiba's lungs were working overtime as his breathing slowly became a tortured, painful process. Blood flowed to his head, and it appeared to be leaking out of his eyes in a small waterfall and soaking the grass.

He began to shiver. The temperature was dropping rapidly.

Akamaru was nowhere to be found.

Kiba, bound and paralysed, gave one last gasp, and his body went limp, supported only by its grass bindings, as everything turned to blackness around him.

Meanwhile, several miles away, Kankuro lay unconscious in a pool of blood, his life rapidly seeping away.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

_Where am I?_

_Am I dead?_

_Shino? Hinata? Akamaru? Where are you?_

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Shizune surveyed the battered body of the young Sand ninja that had been brought in earlier. Although he was out of danger, now that the tiny shards of rock had been sucked out of him by the bubble technique that had successfully been used on him before, he was in a bad shape. When he had been brought in, his face was barely recognisable; it was swollen, covered in black bruises, and caked with blood and the purple paint that he habitually wore. He had been placed on the same ward as Kurenai Yuuhi's team. All three of them had been recovered by reinforcements from Sunagakure, and were now lying in bed in various states of disrepair. Although the Aburame boy was conscious, the Hyuuga girl and the Inuzuka boy were barely alive.

Shizune wondered where Tsunade-sama was. She had been out on the battlefield with her earlier, but had been forced to escape to the secret, other hospital that had been set up in the mountains for times such as these. Konoha's main hospital was currently not safe, as the Akatsuki members had penetrated the chakra field surrounding it.

She had barely escaped with her life. A bandage covered the dark hole where, moments earlier, her right eye had been. She had been part of a group sent after Konan, an Akatsuki member who was said to be made of paper, and who was complicit in Jiraiya's death. Sure enough, Konan had divided herself into thousands of pieces of paper, sharp enough to cut through arteries. She had channeled her chakra into each tiny piece, and one of them had gouged out Shizune's right eye. Shizune silently thanked the gods she had remembered to bring medicines with her. Had she not taken the painkillers, she would have collapsed from the pain. It was a miracle she'd made it this far. The Kazekage's sister intervening and blowing the shards of paper into confusion with her giant fan had helped too.

She could have sworn the Sand boy had moved.

_What was his name again?_

As if he were reading her thoughts, Shino spoke up. “His name is Kankuro,” he intoned. “How do I know this? I fought with him once, three years ago, in the Forest of Death, after he failed to fight me in the Chuunin Exams.”

“Kankuro,” Shizune said gently, taking his hand in hers. “Can you hear me? If you can, squeeze my hand.”

She felt the faintest of pressures on her hand, as if a leaf had landed on it.

“He's conscious,” she said to one of the other medic-nins present.

Kankuro's swollen lips moved. She wondered what he was trying to say, and peered at him through her remaining eye. Kankuro's lips moved again, and she realised he was trying to say a name.

“Gaa...ra...” Kankuro breathed. It seemed to Shizune that for Kankuro in his current state, even uttering a mere syllable was like trying to move a mountain with his little finger.

“No sign of Gaara-sama yet, I'm afraid,” she said gently.

A small trickle of blood emerged from Kankuro's mouth, and Shizune slowly, carefully, wiped it away.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

_Where am I?_

_Shino?_

_Hinata?_

_Those Amegakure nin...I killed them...or did they kill me? Who is the dead man here?_

_That fucking grass round my neck. It can't have been real._

_Can it?_

“Kiba?”

I can hear someone...calling me...

“Kiba?”

_Hana? Mum? Hinata?_

_I'm dreaming. I'm hearing things. Stupid._

“He's still yet to regain consciousness,” said the medic-nin, staring anxiously at the dog-nin before her.

In the opposite bed, Shino prayed silently that Hinata and Kiba would be fine.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

The sun was descending slowly. The battle still raged on outside, the streets filled with corpses, ANBU hurriedly gathering up the sick and the dying and ferrying them to the secret location.

Kiba's nose was penetrated by the scent of medicine, antiseptic, and blood, intermingled with the fresh scent of the mountains. He opened one eye, to find a blurry figure standing over him, then closed it immediately when his head began to swim.

“Where am I?”

“So you're awake at last, Kiba,” said Shizune. “You're in hospital, on the outskirts of Konoha. And I know what you're going to ask. Your team mates were brought back around the same time you were. Shino is recovering quickly, and your sister's looking after Akamaru, but Hinata is still very ill. She has been poisoned. You too, by the looks of it. You were caught in an illusion.” She wondered if she should tell Kiba the whole story: that Hinata had been raped minutes before she was found, and that the Amegakure ninja who raped her were in the act of bukkakeing on her unconscious body when the Konoha ninja confronted them.

“Was I?” murmured Kiba. “Gods, I'm stupid...thank you. How long was I out for?”

“Five days.”

Kiba's eyes grew wide. “And Hinata? She won't...”

Shizune was about to reply when the door burst open, and a young jounin, with a network of scar tissue covering half his face, rushed in. The hackles on Kiba's neck stood up, as his inbuilt canine senses told him that something was wrong. Shino also sensed it, and stiffened.

“Raidou?” gasped Shizune. “What's going on?”

Raidou bowed his head, and the ward fell deathly silent.

“Shizune...I...I...don't know how to tell you this,” he said, an audible tremor in his voice. “I'm sorry...I'm so sorry...the Hokage...Akatsuki...”

“What?” the medical jounin almost screamed. “The Fifth? What is happening, damn you?”

Kiba could have sworn that Raidou's eyes were filling with tears. Shizune's face looked even ghostlier before in the dim light.

Raidou massaged his forehead with his bandaged hand and announced in a voice that betrayed his sorrow and terror, “Tsunade-sama has fallen in battle.”

Kiba felt as though his body were slowly being eroded away by acid. He found himself beginning to shiver, as the colour drained from the faces of the medics, and Raidou caught Shizune just in time as she collapsed to the ground.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Gradually, as the days passed, the war still raged on, and the wards began to fill. Kiba's strength began to return to his body, like a cup being filled with water from a trickling tap.

He recognised names, faces, voices. Gingerly propping himself up on his side, he looked out the window and saw two giant figures stalking the streets. He noticed that one of them was carrying a staff, while the other, smaller one was wearing armour. “The Akimichis are OK, at least,” Kiba thought, smiling wryly to himself.

Reports flowed in from the battlefield. Anko Mitarashi, a former student of Orochimaru, had had her soul ripped out by one of Pein's bodies. Various members of the Hyuuga clan had lost their lives. The elders had been attacked from above by another of Pein's bodies, and killed before they even knew what hit them. After teleporting into her office and confronting her on the roof of the standard hospital, Madara Uchiha had been the one who had delivered the fatal blow to Tsunade, preventing her from regenerating with the use of his Eternal Mangekyo Sharingan. Rumours abounded that the traitor Sasuke had killed Danzo, the Hokage's old enemy, and seriously wounded Madara before mysteriously disappearing.

Meanwhile, Kankuro had finally regained consciousness, and was almost hysterically begging to see Gaara and Temari. Rock Lee was brought in, unconscious. Shortly after, Sai – a victim of one of Pein's summons - followed; next was Chouji, emaciated by the Akimichi clan's notorious red soldier pill and bleeding heavily from several large gashes in his torso that had been caused by a summon mauling him; and Hinata's cousin Neji, whose hands were wrapped in bloodstained bandages. Several wounded Sand nin were carted in. Gaara and Temari were not among them.

“Where's my brother and sister?” Kankuro yelled. “Where the fuck are they?”

“Kankuro-san, please be patient,” pleaded the medic-nin. “We have so many people coming in, it's difficult to tell right now...”

“But Gaara's the fucking Kazekage!” Kankuro wailed. “Where is he? Where is he?”

“I've told you, Kankuro-san. I don't know.”

“I see that childish puppet ninja is shooting his mouth off again,” Shino remarked to Kiba. Kiba said nothing. He stared up at the ceiling and wished the sickness in his head and stomach would end.

The entire room became bathed in a red glow, its eerie light dyeing the walls a shade of pale pink. The ground trembled as a mighty roar sounded through the air, threatening to split the sky open.

Iruka Umino, currently taking a break from helping to keep a watchful eye on the young children of the village, looked out of the window, and was overcame by nausea at what he saw, as memories of his parents' deaths hit him like falling rocks.

 _The Kyuubi,_ he thought. _The Kyuubi has returned._

For there, in the distance, stood a giant fox, its nine tails lashing in the wind.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Naruto Uzumaki, his body fused with the giant toad Gamabunta and the chakra of the Kyuubi, a toad on each shoulder, stared down at the red-haired man in the Akatsuki cloak. Nagato stared back defiantly, his chakra rod primed to react to the overwhelming chakra of the Jinchuuriki.

“You will never take me,” Naruto hissed. Nagato launched himself at the giant fox, but was swept aside by its paw, as though he were a mere leaf in the wind.

“You will never take me.”

“I want to bring peace to the world,” Nagato said in a monotone. “By capturing all tailed beasts, I would fulfill my intention of bringing the world under my control. Join me, and we can change the world together.”

“Join you?” Naruto howled. “ _Join you?_ ”

Nagato nodded.

“I would rather fucking _die_ than join you, you evil murdering bastard,” Naruto hissed through gritted fangs.

“Then I have no choice,” murmured Nagato, and attacked Naruto with a bolt of lightning. Naruto barely moved. He threw back his head and laughed a bitter laugh.

“I control the Kyuubi. I _am_ the Kyuubi now. And I will make you pay a thousand times over for everything you have done. You and your bastard organisation. You stole my best friend. You murdered Gaara. You killed Shikamaru's teacher. You killed the Hokage. You killed my mentor and my teacher. And now you're trying to destroy my home. I will not forgive you.”

From between the Kyuubi's eyes, the real Naruto emerged. The giant fox took a step forward.

“You killed Jiraiya.”

The Kyuubi took another step forward.

“You killed Kakashi.”

The Kyuubi took another step forward, Nagato now inches from its paws. Naruto pointed an accusing finger at him.

“You will not kill me. I don't know if there's an afterlife or not, but if there is, I hope that Dad, Jiraiya and Kakashi are watching me right now, 'cos I'm going to make them proud of me.”

The toads began to sing. Miles away, in the hospital, Iruka stared out of the window, and wondered what the hell was going on outside.

“Dad, Jiraiya, Kakashi-sensei!” Naruto screamed. “This is for you!”

The song of the toads reached a crescendo, and the world itself seemed to break in two.

In the makeshift hospital, Kankuro and Temari clung to each other, saying nothing, for nothing could be said.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

To Kiba, it was as though he were in the middle of a never-ending nightmare, accompanied by a soundtrack of sobs and groans and helpless, wretched cries. Around him, the sick, the injured and the dying lay comatose or sat on their beds, wrapped in blankets, while others leaned against the walls or curled up on the floor. Blank eyes stared into space. The stench of blood filled his nose, threatening to choke him.

He dragged himself out of bed and took a few faltering steps out into the corridor, and saw Team Gai congregating further away. Tenten had returned from the battlefield, her hair undone from its usual buns, and although Kiba's eyes were swollen, he could still make out the mixture of horror and grief etched onto her face.

“Tenten!” cried Lee. “Where's Gai-sensei? Is he OK?”

Tenten stared at her shoes as tears began to form in her dark eyes.

“You know something?” Lee pressed. “What's wrong? Has something happened? Where's Gai-sensei? Please tell me, Tenten! Please! I just want to know where he is! Why aren't you telling me? Damn you!” By this time, his voice had risen to a scream.

“Because you're not letting her get a word in edgways, Lee,” said Neji coldly. “Be quiet a minute.”

Tenten forced herself to speak. Choking back her own tears, she told Lee and Neji that Gai had been fighting Kisame, an Akatsuki member, a tall sharkman who Gai had encountered on a couple of previous occasions. Gai had won the fight and killed Kisame, but at a price. He had opened all eight chakra gates, and subsequently collapsed and died shortly after.

Neji appeared to be caught in an illusion. Kiba walked away, feeling guilty for watching a personal moment, but stopped dead in a tracks when he heard the sound of a boy screaming.

“GAI-SENSEIIIII! NOOOOO!”

Lee's legs gave way and he fell to the floor, crying out Gai's name over and over. Kiba returned to the ward, a haunted expression on his face.

Kankuro, meanwhile, attempted to make room on his bed for his sister. Her face was covered in cuts and bruises, her dress was soaked in blood, and her fan had been broken.

“Temari-chan,” he breathed, “what happened to you?”

Temari recounted the horrific story of what had happened to her. Along with Ino, Shikamaru, Chouji – who had used _Baika no Jutsu_ to increase his size - and Neji, she had been fighting Konan. Ino, using her _Shintenshin_ , had found her. Temari used her fan and summoned Kamatari, the one eyed weasel, who tore through Konan, dispersing her into shards of paper. The gigantic Chouji had helped by blowing at Konan, and this, coupled with Temari's technique, had prevented her from reforming her body. Neji, using the Hyuugas' _Hakke Hyaku Nijuhachi Sho_ technique, had continued to keep Konan at bay, frantically slapping at the paper with his chakra-filled hands. When Konan reassembled herself, Shikamaru, remembering how he had killed another Akatsuki member, bound her with his shadow and attached explosive tags to her body, setting her on fire.

The group had then dispersed, at which point Temari had run into Pein, and attempted to attack him alone.

Kankuro's face turned white with rage as Temari told him of how Pein had absorbed her wind attack and used it to slam her into a wall, breaking her fan and fracturing her skull. He had then summoned one of his bodies to hold Temari down and rape her, before beating her severely and leaving her for dead. She had been found by a female ANBU, who smuggled her to the hospital. Lifting up her dress, she showed her brother the bruises left on her inner thighs, her face expressionless.

“That bastard,” Kankuro breathed. “I wish I could go out there and kill him right now.” He attempted to move his legs, but the pain that shot through them was so great that he recoiled in shock.

“He's probably dead now,” Temari said, her head bowed. “No use getting angry, Kankuro-kun.”

Kankuro sank back into the mattress, defeated. He had never seen Temari like this. His big sister, the strong, confident girl who was top of her class at the Suna academy, who blew enemies away in the blinking of an eye, who had teased Kankuro whenever he was on the verge of tears and stood up to Baki-sensei back when Sunagakure and Konoha were about to go to war, was lying on her side, aimlessly staring into space. Both of them, once feared and respected by many of the other ninja in Sunagakure, now helpless and incapacitated in a hospital in a foreign land. And still there was no sign of their brother. Kankuro gritted his teeth and forced himself not to think of the possibility that Gaara might be...no. Gaara would be fine. He himself had bragged about his little brother being a genius, back when they'd all come to Konoha before the Chuunin Exams. OK, Gaara no longer had Shukaku inside of him

He tried to console himself with the fact that he'd fought off and killed a good few Amegakure ninja, while hidden inside Sanshuo. After that horrible incident with that fucking traitor Sasori Akasunano last year, Kankuro had fixed his puppets, adding even more traps to them. Karasu contained even more poison gas than before. He'd killed three Amegakure nin with it, trapped others in Kuroari and impaled them, and even managed to get a few shots in at that ginger-haired freak with the piercings while Gaara trapped and crushed the strange half-man, half-plant creature that was spying for Akatsuki. At least the puppets weren't smashed to bits this time. But it was no use; Kankuro felt as though he was literally weighed down by helplessness, a feeling that was not unlike drowning in quicksand.

He wondered how many of the Sunagakure troops had died.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

“Over here! I've found him!”

Ino Yamanaka knelt down besides the unconscious Naruto and felt for a pulse. Sakura Haruno rushed towards them, followed by Chouza Akimichi, Shikamaru and Shikaku Nara.

“He's not...he's not...” Sakura gasped. Ino shook her head, and Fukusaku, the ancient toad sent by Jiraiya to train Naruto, croaked, “'E's exhausted. Very little chakra left. Take him to an 'ospital, an' fast!”

“Still as bothersome as ever,” Shikamaru said with a wry smile. “Is it true, Dad? He fought the Akatsuki leader?”

“So I've heard,” replied Shikaku. He turned to his team mate. “Chouza, we'd better get this kid to the hospital. It's not as damaged as we thought, and they're starting to move people down there now.” He paused, then added, “Chouji's already in there.”

Shikamaru's jaw dropped, a terrifying coldness enveloping his body. Wordlessly, Chouza picked Naruto up and slung him over his shoulder. The little group rushed to the original Konoha hospital, Sakura and Ino in the lead.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kankuro awoke to find a pair of dark, wolf-like eyes staring into his.

“Well, well, well,” said Kiba. “Fancy seeing you here. Almost didn't recognise you without your make-up on.”

“Where's Temari?” asked Kankuro, realising his sister was no longer on the bed.

“Hello to you too,” said Kiba sarcastically. “She's down there.” Kankuro followed Kiba's finger, and saw Temari curled up on the floor next to his bed, wrapped in a blanket. Her face was still ashen, and she looked strangely vulnerable, almost childlike. Anger gripped Kankuro's throat like a hard fist as images of Temari screaming, her legs pulled apart, her dress pulled up over her knees, danced before his eyes.

“That bastard...” he spat out. “My sister...how could they...I'll get him. I'll make him fucking bleed, I'll kill him a thousand times over for what he did to her. I'll avenge her...Temari. I'll kill him. I'll...”

“I,” said a surprisingly deep voice, “have taken care of that.”

With difficulty, Kankuro shifted over onto his right side, and his eyes became saucer-like when he saw the speaker.

 _Gaara_.

He was safe. Kankuro breathed a sigh of relief and sank back into the mattress, the tension within his damaged body uncoiling.

“I saw what that...thing...did to her, Kankuro,” Gaara continued. “I followed him. I wrapped him in sand and crushed him before he knew what was even happening.”

Kankuro realised that his brother's tunic was spattered with blood. Kiba's hand came to his mouth as he remembered that time he and his team mates had seen Gaara killing three Amegakure ninja in seconds. He had almost killed them and Kankuro into the bargain...but Gaara seemed different this time, somehow. His pale, pupilless eyes were filled not with bloodlust and hatred, but with sorrow and anger for his brother and sister.

Gaara laid a hand on Kankuro's shoulder.

“The war is over.”


	4. Border Collie

Iruka Umino picked up the list of names, including the respective heads of Konoha's top ninja clans, and, looking around the room, read out the names one by one. He was surprised to see that Ibiki Morino, head of the Interrogation Squad, was there.

“Shibi Aburame, Aburame clan?”

“Present.”

“Chouza Akimichi, Akimichi clan?”

Chouji's father stifled a yawn. “Present.”

“Hiashi Hyuuga, Hyuuga clan, main house?”

“Present.”

“Neji Hyuuga, Hyuuga clan, branch house?”

Neji nodded curtly.

“Tsume Inuzuka, Inuzuka clan?”

Kuromaru, Kiba's mother's big wolf-dog, answered for her: “Yes, she's here.”

“Shikaku and Shikamaru Nara, Nara clan?”

Shikaku and his son both raised their hands.

“Fugaku...” Iruka began, and then stopped himself, remembering that the head of the Uchiha clan had been killed in the massacre a few years earlier. “Inoichi Yamanaka, Yamanaka clan?”

“Inoichi sends his apologies,” Ibiki answered. “He's interrogating a prisoner at the moment and asked me to come on his behalf.”

The young teacher cleared his throat. “Right then, we'd better begin.” He placed his palms on the desk in front of him. “This meeting, as you are all aware, has been called to discuss the future of this village. I'm sure you all know by now that the Fifth fell in battle, as did Kakashi Hatake, who had been originally listed as a potential successor.” He bit his lip, forcing back the tears that were beginning to build up. “Other potential candidates, such as Jiraiya, Maito Gai and Asuma Sarutobi” - here, Shikamaru bowed his head - “have also lost their lives. We need to find someone who can take on the position of the Sixth Hokage. Shikamaru and Neji, I know neither of you are out of your teens yet, but you've always been among my best pupils, and you've been entrusted with a lot of responsibilities lately. Therefore, it's only fair that you should have a say in this.”

Shikamaru massaged his eyelids with his thumbs, and wondered how Temari was. Although Gaara had returned to Sunagakure two days after the war had ended, along with the Sunagakure reinforcements who were able to walk, both she and Kankuro had stayed behind in Konoha. Gaara, knowing of his sister's ordeal, had ordered her to stay in Konoha until she felt “more stable”, and, at Shikamaru's insistence, his parents had offered to let her stay with them while she recovered. As for Kankuro, there was no question of him returning to Sunagakure at the present time, not while he was still unable to walk; he was currently staying at the Inuzuka compound. He could just about manage with crutches, but the _Doton_ attack had severely damaged muscles and nerves in his legs, and walking longer distances caused him great pain. It had been Kiba who had suggested that he ride to the hospital, where he was receiving daily treatment, on Akamaru's back.

He glanced over at Chouza Akimichi, and noticed the dark rings under his eyes. Chouji was still in hospital, and since the end of the war, a small vigil had been conducted by his parents and Shikamaru outside the operation theatre. From time to time, Shikaku had joined them, bringing food or news from the outside world. Inoichi Yamanaka, his other team mate – had been preoccupied with interrogating a prisoner, a young girl who, it turned out, was the sole surviving member of Akatsuki. Save the Uchiha traitor, of course, presuming he hadn't died in battle. He had still not been found. As many of the interrogation squad had died in battle, Inoichi had enlisted the help of his daughter Ino, believing it would be good training for her. Though fearing for Chouji's life, Ino had agreed to help her father.

Megumi Akimichi slept, curled up on one of the benches, while Chouza and Shikamaru sat next to her and stared into space.

“This operation's going to be a long one,” Shikaku had warned his team mate. “Remember last time this happened to Chouji? He was in theatre for days. He's not going to be out for a while. You ought to go home, get some rest. And besides, Tsunade isn't operating on Chouji this time. What if...” He couldn't say it.

“That's what I'm here for,” Chouza had replied. “I have faith. I'm prepared to wait as long as it takes.”

“She's still a kid, Chouza,” Shikaku had argued. “You really think she's capable of saving Chouji? And what the hell are you and Megumi going to do?”

Chouza sighed. “Take it in turns to keep watch, you idiot. Is it not obvious? For all we know, Miss Sakura could be out any minute.”

“Go home. Get some sleep.”

“No.”

Shikaku let out a sound of impatience. “Gods, you're still as bull-headed as ever. You think just sitting here is going to make Chouji better instantly?”

Megumi stirred in her sleep. Shikamaru murmured, “Dad, stop it.”

“I don't think that, Shikaku,” Chouza said. He pressed two fingers against his eyelid, massaging the eyeball.

“Then go home.”

Chouza's tiny eyes narrowed to slits. “You're doing my head in, Shikaku.”

The two older ninjas glared at each other. Shikamaru sighed, slumping against the wall. Then he remembered Temari, excused himself, and returned to the Nara compound to check on her. “I'll be back later, Chouza-san,” he said.

Chouza heaved his huge body off the bench and placed his hands on Shikaku's shoulders. “Are you starting on me?” Shikaku asked, suspiciously. “I know you're tired and you're worried about Chouji, but if you're going to start a fight, you could at least...”

“Shikaku,” Chouza said through gritted teeth, “do you think you could shut the fuck up for a minute?”

Shikaku had then fallen silent, and looked up at Chouza expectingly.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

“What is it, Akamaru?”

The dog whined, inclining his head towards Kankuro.

“I know it's not easy for you, Akamaru,” said Kiba gently, ruffling the fur on his dog's head. “But Kankuro needs somewhere to stay and Mum and me offered to put him up. Kuromaru and Hana and the others don't mind, and he's no trouble, are you, Kankuro?”

Kankuro, lying on Kiba's bed with his head resting on his arms, could not resist grinning at Kiba's chutzpah. Kiba's bedroom was so much cosier than his own sparse, windowless bedroom back in Sunagakure, and Kiba had even let Kankuro sleep in his bed, bedding down himself on the floor. The Inuzukas in general had been great. Although he was slightly scared of Tsume, she had been friendly enough, as had Hana, Kiba's sister. The dogs had treated Kankuro as if he were another family member, although he believed that had he been wearing his cat hat, they might have attempted to chase him up the nearest tree.

“Gods, no,” he laughed. “I'm a good boy. Just ask your master.”

“How's your physio going?” Kiba asked.

“Not bad,” came the reply. “They got me to walk about 100m with crutches, and fuck me, it hurt, but I did it.” He looked proud. “I carry on like this, I should be able to walk back here without Akamaru's help. Although it looks like I'll be stuck in Konoha for a couple of months. I'm not fit to walk back to Suna just yet.” He paused, then added, “On the plus side, my legs don't hurt as much as they did. These painkillers they've given me are a bloody miracle.”

“Have you seen Temari recently?” asked Kiba. A shadow passed over Kankuro's face.

“Yeah, briefly,” he said curtly, and something in his voice told Kiba not to enquire any further. He tried to offer some words of comfort, but all he could offer was, “I kind of know how you feel. It happened to Hinata too, you know.”

“She's not your sister,” Kankuro replied coldly.

“Your point being?”

“Kiba,” Kankuro said testily, “are you always this thick? Temari and I grew up together. We trained together. She helped raise me. We fought side by side since we were kids, we both grew up with Gaara on our backs, threatening to kill us if we so much as looked at him. I'd never have got through my childhood if it hadn't been for her. She's a fucking heroine, my sister is. An amazing woman. And to see her like this...you can't imagine, Kiba, so don't try, alright? You...you've not been through _half_ of what Temari and I have.” He clenched his fists. “You know I can't forgive myself for what happened to her? I feel it's my fault, that I couldn't protect her, somehow, not that she needs protection, Kiba, but she got fucking _raped_ and I was in fucking _hospital_ , and it's not the first time I've failed to protect my family.” His voice became higher, more frantic. “You know when Gaara got kidnapped by Akatsuki? I was there. They flew off with him while I was stood there like an _idiot_ , and when I went after him I nearly got killed, and I'll never forget it as long as I live. And now Temari's at Shikamaru's and even though they're going out, have been for a while, she won't sleep with him, he can't even touch her without her being reminded of the rape, yes, Kiba, she told me this last time I saw her, can you imagine what it did to me, hearing that? And you ask me what my fucking point was? Fuck you.”

Kiba sighed, and traced lines on his forehead with his index and middle fingers. “Kankuro...”

“Shut up, Kiba.”

Kiba heaved himself up off the bed, and beckoned to Akamaru. “Come on, boy, we're going for a walk.” He looked at Kankuro. “I'm going to give you some time alone. You need to cool off.”

Kankuro tilted his head back and stared up at the ceiling, saying nothing.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Shikaku had waited for a reply from his team mate.

“You know who that boy in there is, Shikaku?” Chouza had said at long last. “He's my son. My flesh and blood. He's my only child, Shikaku, and what's more, he's one of the only clan members left now. They still haven't found all the bodies yet. At least I know where Chouji is, and I know there's a 50% chance he'll survive. Remember the last time he took the red pill? He survived. The Fifth may be dead, but I trust Sakura with his life. I have faith in her. And whether it's good news or bad that she brings us, I want to be here when she comes out of the theatre.” He threw a brief glance at Megumi. “And so does my wife.”

He had dug his considerable fingers into Shikaku's shoulders. Shikaku winced at the memory of it. His team mate was one of the biggest men in Konoha, and, like most of his clan, used his sheer size as a weapon. Shikaku had wondered if Chouza was about to perform _Bubun Baika no Jutsu_ on him and rip his arms off with his gigantic hands.

“I'm not going anywhere until I know either way what happens to my son. And that, Shikaku, is all I have to say on the matter. Do not try and talk me out of it, because you will be wasting your time. Am I making myself clear?”

Shikaku had nodded sullenly. Chouza had then let go of him, and gone back to sitting outside the ward without another word.

Shikaku's thoughts returned to the official building, where Hiashi Hyuuga was presently speaking. “I certainly would not propose either of my daughters. Hanabi is too young and inexperienced, and Hinata is certainly not suitable for a leadership role. I have given up all hope of her ever progressing as a shinobi.” He looked pained. “However, there is still my nephew to consider. He was first among his age group to be promoted to the rank of Jounin.”

Neji, recalling the old animosity between the branch and main houses of the Hyuuga clan, went red. “Thank you, Uncle, but I'd rather not be Hokage. I honestly do not think I could handle it.”

“Don't do yourself down, Neji,” said Iruka kindly. Neji shook his head. “I am not fishing for compliments, Mr. Umino. I just don't think I am the right person for Hokage. A Hokage's assistant, perhaps, but that's it as far as I am concerned.”

“Neither am I,” chimed in Shikamaru. “Too much responsibility. I've got my future planned anyway. I'm going to continue teaching and working as an examiner at the Chuunin Exams.”

His father concurred, adding, “My son – I hope you don't mind me referring to you in the third person, Shikamaru – has matured considerably over the past year, particularly given that his team were one of the first to lose their sensei. I know Mr. Yamanaka – were he here – and Mr. Akimichi will back me up on this when I say that Shikamaru was a confident and capable leader of his team.” He smiled at Chouza, who did not return the smile. “He's certainly gotten out of the habit of referring to everything as 'troublesome' and trying to shift the work onto others. But leading a whole village? He's not got what it takes.”

“Nor has my son,” added Tsume Inuzuka. “If anything, he's got a lot of growing up to do.”

“Or mine,” spoke up Shibi Aburame. “He wants to join the ANBU anyway.” He turned to Chouza and said, “You've not said anything about Chouji yet, I notice.”

Chouza sighed and ran his fingers through his long red hair. “That's because my son isn't confident enough to be Hokage. I know what most of you think of him – no, not you, Shikaku. You all think he's an idiot, am I right?”

“Don't be ridiculous,” Iruka said sternly. “Chouji is a hero, and the village by and large acknowledges that...”

“But he's not Hokage material,” Ibiki finished for him. “Hokages need confidence. And he's not very bright.”

“He's a good kid,” Chouza said through gritted teeth. “And I never even said he was Hokage material. You are preaching to the choir.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kiba, returning from walking Akamaru, went into the kitchen, filled the kettle at the sink, and put it on to boil water for tea. He picked two cups off the draining board, searched in the kitchen cupboards until he found a box of teabags, and dropped a teabag into each cup. He poured boiling water into the cups, stood with his hand absent-mindedly placed on Akamaru's head, and waited for the tea to become darker. He removed the teabag from one of the cups and added milk and sugar. With Akamaru at his heels, he carefully carried the cups upstairs, and pushed the door to his bedroom open with his foot. Placing the cups of tea gently on the bedside table, he looked at the sleeping Kankuro.

Thin slivers of sunlight streamed in through the slats of the closed blinds, drawing pale stripes across Kankuro's body. The older ninja was lying on his side, his head rested awkwardly on one arm. Without thinking, Kiba laid his hand on Kankuro's head and began to stroke his hair.

His eyes still closed, Kankuro smiled and said softly, “Hello, Kiba.”

Kiba withdrew his hand with a start.

“You didn't have to stop,” Kankuro murmured. He rolled onto his back and shielded his eyes with his arm. “Sorry I blew up at you earlier. I shouldn't have taken it out on you. I'm just...all this stuff with Temari is getting to me, you know?”

“Don't apologise,” said Kiba with a shake of his head. “I was being an idiot. I shouldn't have said all that stuff about Hinata.” He picked up the cup of tea with sugar and milk in it and held it out to Kankuro. “I made some tea for you.”

The jounin sat up, took the cup from Kiba and drank the entire cup in one go. “Ahhhh. I needed that. Cheers, mate.”

Kiba excused himself, and walked towards his bedroom door, only to discover that, although his feet were moving, his body remained static. Suddenly, his body was jerked backwards, and it was then that he realised that Kankuro had attached chakra strings to his arm.

 _Kankuro can turn people into puppets? What the_ fuck?

“Come.”

Kankuro tugged on the chakra strings, and Kiba gave a yelp as he lost his balance. He pressed a hand against the nearest wall to steady himself. He tried to pull against the strings, but his efforts were futile; despite his injuries, Kankuro was surprisingly strong, and he evidently was not going to let go.

“What are you playing at, Kankuro?”

In reply, the older boy gave a sharp tug on the strings, and Kiba fell backwards onto the bed.

“I haven't forgotten, you know,” he said with a mischievous smile.

“Forgotten what?”

“That night at the hot spring, you idiot,” Kankuro laughed. “C'mon, Kiba, I'm not stupid. Why do you think I asked you to put me up? And I know you want me, Kiba. It's _so_ fucking obvious. Don't think I haven't noticed the way you look at me.”

Kiba opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out.

_Kankuro is onto me. Damn it. Some ninja I am._

“Well? Haven't you got anything to say to that?” Kankuro asked, and he gently turned Kiba's head to face him.

_I can't...I can't..._

He remembered the hot spring, the sight of Kankuro without his face paint on,

 _Fuck it,_ Kiba thought, and kissed Kankuro on the lips. Kankuro dissipated the chakra strings and pulled Kiba down onto him, and soon the two boys were wrapped in each other. Kiba rolled off Kankuro, threw back the duvet, and climbed back onto him, his knees on either side of Kankuro's hips.

“Fuck me, Kiba,” Kankuro whispered in the younger boy's ear. “ _Fuck me_.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

The Akimichi clan head and Ibiki were now arguing over a perceived slight against Chouji. Hoping to thwart the argument, Shikaku asked, “What about that Sakura Haruno one? She's an intelligent girl, hard-working, cares about this village. She nearly died fighting that Madara bastard, but she kept on going till he was dead. Balls of steel, that girl.”

“Inoichi definitely thinks so,” added Ibiki. “His daughter and Sakura go way back, and he's got a lot of time for her. Says she's amazing for someone with no ninja background. Lots of latent talent, and she's not even reached her full potential...”

“And she saved the Kazekage's brother,” Tsume said. “She's the second coming of the Fifth, isn't she? Except she doesn't have those dinosaurs to deal with.” She looked pointedly at Hiashi, who ignored her.

Iruka's brow furrowed. “She's got potential.”

“But she does not come from a ninja clan,” Hiashi argued.

“Neither did the Fourth,” Chouza countered, stifling a yawn. “And he was the best Hokage we ever had.”

Iruka's eyes lit up as the ghost of an idea wormed its way into his brain.

“I still say Neji should do the job,” Hiashi continued. Neji's face clouded over. _Damn it, Uncle,_ he thought. _Why won't you listen to me?_ As if he were reading Neji's thoughts, Shikamaru countered, “Neji has already said he doesn't want to do it, Sir Hiashi.”

“Why does it have to be one of the Konoha Eleven anyway?” Shibi asked no-one in particular. “Aren't there any...well...older candidates?”

“Are you referring to yourself, Aburame-san?” Tsume asked slyly. Shibi glowered at her. “I most certainly am not. Besides, since the Elders are dead now, I thought it was agreed earlier that, as heads of the remaining Noble Clans of Konoha, Chouza, Hiashi and myself would naturally replace them?”

Shikaku groaned inwardly. _Nice one, Shibi,_ he thought. _Let's make Hiashi-sama's head disappear even further up his own rectum._

“An Akimichi becoming a Konoha Elder?” Hiashi said scornfully. “Who would have thought?”

Shikamaru, remembering the rage and pain in Chouji's eyes as he stood on the battlefield with a pill box in his hand, clenched his fists under the table. “The Akimichi clan helped save the village, Hiashi-sama,” he snarled. “A certain team mate of mine killed one of that Pein creature's bodies, in case you've forgotten.”

Chouza got up, and Shikaku immediately tensed himself, worrying his team mate was going to attack Hiashi. However, the big ninja simply said to Iruka, “I'd better get back to the hospital. I need to check on my son.”

“I'll come with you,” Shikamaru offered. Chouza made no attempt to stop him, and the two left the meeting.

Once they were out of earshot of the meeting, Chouza exhaled loudly and said, “That fucking Hyuuga. What does _he_ know about our clan? I tell you, Shikamaru, I was this close to beating the shit out of him.”

“That, Akimichi-san,” replied Shikamaru, “is why I left myself.” He rummaged in his trouser pockets and added, “Plus Dad told me to give you this...if I can find it...” He frowned in concentration, until his fingers eventually came into contact with a syringe, and a package of powder. “Aha! Got you, you little bastard,” Shikamaru said with a triumphant smile, and handed over the package and the syringe.

“What is it?” Chouza asked.

“Just a little something to stop you sleeping, Dad said,” explained Shikamaru. “You don't need that much. If you inject it, it'll take effect more quickly. He thought you'd want to stay awake in case, you know...”

“Very perceptive of him,” Chouza said wryly. “Thanks, Shikamaru.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

His clothes in a pile on the floor, Kiba spread Kankuro's legs and slid into him. He hoped the meeting of the clan heads would be long, and that his mother would not catch him _in flagrante delicto_ with the Inuzukas' guest.

“Ever since that day,” Kankuro breathed. “I haven't forgotten about you, Kiba.”

Placing his hands on Kankuro's shoulders, Kiba stared into the jounin's eyes and replied, “Me neither.”

“I hoped we'd meet again,” Kankuro continued breathlessly. “It...it was one of the best nights of my life. Gods, Kiba, I've not fucked anyone like that in a long time.”

Kiba arched his back, and thrusted hard into Kankuro, trying to ignore the scars across his nose, the huge smile-like line across his stomach where he had been stabbed and poisoned by an Akatsuki member, the reminders of shrapnel etched all over his legs. The marks of war.

_My beautiful scarred Kankuro. My handsome mess of a man._

“Fuck me harder, Kiba.”

Kiba bent his arms until he was touching nose-to-nose with Kankuro, and began to kiss his neck, tracing a downward path down to Kankuro's shoulder. Sweat poured down his back, as Kankuro wrapped his legs around Kiba and dug his nails into the chuunin's back.

“Kan-ku-ro,” Kiba panted. “Am I hurting...”

“ _Noooooo!_ ” the jounin wailed, his head thrown back.

And even if Kiba was hurting him, Kankuro didn't care. Any pain he felt was nullified by the sheer bliss of having this gorgeous manbeast inside him. Normally he preferred being on top, but there was a wildness in Kiba's eyes, a primitive edge to him that appealed to Kankuro's gentler side. He was a wolf in the body of a boy, a wolf that needed to be tamed.

Kankuro squeezed his eyes shut, and let his imagination run wild.

He imagined that he and Kiba were flying high over Konoha, the people like ants below them. Over mountains, trees, the faces of the five Hokages, the two boys passed, the wind whistling in their ears and brushing their faces. They soared higher, higher, until the entire Fire Country was beneath them, and Kiba was pushing Kankuro above the clouds and the air was getting thinner, Kankuro's breathing growing more frantic, his head spinning, Kiba steering him like a ship through the skies, and he let the chuunin dig his claw-like nails into his back and howl like a wolf as they broke through the clouds and Kiba came and now he was grabbing Kankuro's cock and they were zigzagging towards wherever they were heading, and Kankuro was getting harder and harder and feeling like his head was about to explode, and the sun seemed only metres above them and its heat was burning Kankuro up and melting him and he forgot that he was an injured jounin in rehabilitation in Konoha, he was melting away...

...and then he came and Kiba jerked back, and he was in Konoha again, on the ground, and he was feeling as though his body had turned to running water.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

In Konoha hospital, Shikamaru curled up on a bench and slept alongside Megumi Akimichi, who had just woken up. Further down the corridor, in the toilets, Chouza pulled his belt tight around his arm until a vein came up. He took a deep breath and injected the drugs that Shikamaru had given him into his arm.

 _Here I am_ , he thought, _the head of one of the four noble clans of Konoha, not to mention an Elder, and I'm shooting up like a common junkie while my son is lying in a hospital bed. This is_ not _the behaviour of a ninja. Thank the gods Chouji can't see this._

Shikaku had guessed correctly that his team mate did not want to spend hours sleeping in case he missed important news of Chouji, regardless of the fact that his wife was also there, and that he wanted to stay awake and alert. What Shikaku had not guessed was the other reason for this; that whenever Chouza had fallen asleep, he had been tormented by visions of Chouji's dead and emaciated body, which had been so realistic that he had been close to invading the operating theatre, just to see if Chouji really was dead.

He looked at his reflection in the mirrors. His pupils were dilated.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

The entire room went still as Iruka outlined his proposal. The silence fell like a curtain of fog; one could have heard the dust settling.

Eventually, Tsume Inuzuka broke the silence.

“Are you _sure_ he's cut out for this, Iruka?”

“Absolutely,” the young teacher said firmly. “He has shown time and time again that he is dedicated to this village. He risked his life to save Sasuke Uchiha three years ago when he defected to Orochimaru. He managed to win Gaara over – and now look at him, he's the Kazekage! - during the invasion. He's fought members of Akatsuki, at the cost of his own life, not only for his sake, but for the sake of the village. His sense of honour and duty is far beyond that of a lot of kids in his age group.” He smiled wistfully. “And to think he was the worst kid in my class...”

“Which is one of my main concerns,” Hiashi Hyuuga interjected. “I honestly do not think he is mature enough for such a serious position.”

“On the contrary,” Neji spoke up, “from what I've been told, he showed incredible maturity throughout the battle, even when the Kyuubi overwhelmed him. He's actually learned to control the beast somehow.”

“And we certainly wouldn't be the first village with a Jinchuriki in charge,” mused Inoichi Yamanaka, who had finished his shift an hour earlier. “If it works for Suna...”

“Naruto's not going to let you use him as a puppet, Uncle, if that's what you're getting at,” Neji added. Hiashi coloured. “Do not think so little of me, Neji. I had no intention of using Naruto as a puppet. He is far too stubborn. And I am sure Shibi and Chouza have no intention of it either.” At the mention of his team mate's name, Shikaku wondered if Chouza had started using the drugs yet.

Iruka turned to Shibi Aburame. “You've not said much, Aburame-san. What do you think?”

Shibi was quiet for a few seconds. Then he said, “I think it could work. Age didn't stop Gaara. He will need some more level-headed people around him, mind. Hyuuga-san is right. He's still got a lot of growing up to do.”

“And this, Neji,” Iruka said, “is where you and Shikamaru come in. I'm aware neither of you want to be Hokage, even though you're both suited well enough to the job. How would you feel about being an advisor to Naruto? You're both intelligent, sensible, you have a good relationship with Naruto as far as I'm aware, you're members of established clans. Moreover, Neji, you were one of my top students, and – if I may so - you're a lot calmer than Naruto is. You'd help to keep his feet on the ground.” He smiled at the young jounin. “What do you think?”

“I would be more than happy to take on that position,” Neji answered. “And knowing Shikamaru, he probably would as well.”

The discussion continued for another hour. Eventually, Iruka, deciding it was time to call a halt to proceedings, announced that it was time for a vote.

“All those in favour of Naruto Uzumaki becoming the Sixth Hokage of Konoha?”

Tsume, Inoichi, Shikaku, Neji immediately raised their hands. Shibi followed. After some hesitation, Hiashi, too, raised his hand.

“Can I just say,” Shikaku interjected, “that if my son and Chouza were here, they'd both be voting in agreement as well. Shikamaru's a good friend of Naruto – well, you said it yourself, Iruka – and I know Chouza has a lot of time for the kid too.” Inoichi concurred. “He tends to see the same way as us on these things.”

“Then it's settled,” said Iruka briskly. “Naruto Uzumaki is our new Hokage, and Shikamaru Nara and Neji Hyuuga will act as advisors.” He stood up and reached across the table to shake Neji's head. “Congratulations, Neji. I know you'll all do a fine job.”

“I'll go and tell my son,” Shikaku added, his scarred face positively glowing with pride and happiness.

“Before anyone leaves,” Neji announced, “I would request that we hold a minute's silence for all those who fell in battle recently, and that we send our prayers and best wishes to the Akimichi clan, and to Naruto himself.” Hiashi, who had lost several relatives in the war, looked at the boy with empathy in his white eyes, and thought to himself how much he had changed since those days when Neji was filled with bitterness towards the main house.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Meanwhile, a few miles away, Kankuro and Kiba lay wrapped in each other's arms, with Kiba's head resting on Kankuro's shoulder.

“Kiba?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for that. I can't remember the last time I had such amazing sex.”

Kiba smiled sleepily.

“Kankuro?”

“Uh-huh?”

“You know something?”

“Mmmm?”

“I think I'm in love with you.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

At Konoha hospital, while Shikamaru and Megumi Akimichi kept watch and Chouza injected himself with Shikaku's drugs, Sakura Haruno laid her hands on Chouji's prone body and transferred chakra into it.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Five days later, Shikamaru lay on the hospital bench that he and the Akimichis had been occupying for the past week, trapped in a nightmare.

_He was running through Konoha, Ino and Chouji at his heels. They were following one of the Peins, the female one. She had tried to stop them by summoning a giant dog, but Chouji had crushed it beneath his feet while Shikamaru trapped it with his shadow._

“ _There she is!” Ino cried, and pointed at the figure in the black Akatsuki cloak._

“ _We need,” said Shikamaru, stopping himself and the others, “to formulate a strategy first. We could do the Ino-Shika-Chou formation, but that would be too risky, Ino, if you miss her you're dead, remember?” Ino nodded. “Now we need a distraction.”_

“ _I could act as a decoy,” Chouji suggested._

“ _Are you mad?” Ino almost screamed. “She'll kill you!”_

“ _Don't underestimate me,” said Chouji coldly. “I blew Konan away, didn't I?”_

“ _This one's not made of paper, though.”_

“ _Chouji,” said Shikamaru, “are you suggesting that you're going to somehow distract her? I think I'd better do that. It worked with Hidan, when I lobbed those fake tags at him and then caught his shadow with Asuma-sensei's blades. I could do the same here. And she's on her own.”_

“ _You've got something there, mate,” Chouji said thoughtfully. “Let's go!”..._

_...now Shikamaru was doubled over in pain. His shadow jutsu had run out of time._

“ _N_ ikudan Hari Sensha! _”_

_Chouji, wrapped in his hair, launched himself at the Pein, only to be knocked back by a tremendous wave of chakra. He cried out in pain as his body hit the ground and Shikamaru watched helplessly..._

_...Chouji was searching for his soldier pills. Shikamaru's dark eyes widened in fear as he realised what Chouji was about to do._

“ _Chouji, no!” he pleaded. “Don't take the red pill! It'll kill you!”_

“ _It didn't last time,” Chouji argued._

“ _But Tsunade-sama's dead now,” Ino countered. “She can't help you, you fool. You'll die, are you stupid, Chouji? You'll fucking_ die! _” She was beginning to cry now._

_Chouji merely shook his head and said, “Ino, I have no choice.”_

“ _Have you finished your little conference yet?” said a woman's voice, coldly._

_It was the female Pein. Chouji turned to the others. “I'll deal with her. You two, get away from here.”_

_He popped the red pill in his mouth and swallowed._

“ _Chouji!”_

_Chouji was getting visibly agitated. He was almost screaming now. “_ Go! _Get the fuck away! Ino! Shikamaru! Run! Fucking_ run _!”_

_Shikamaru ran as fast as his legs could carry him. Behind him, he heard the woman say, “Know pain...”_

“ _Shikamaru...Shikamaru...” Someone was calling his name. Was it Ino?_

_Chouji's ghost?_

“Shikamaru...Shikamaru...”

His eyes opened wide. Someone was shaking him.

“Shikamaru...”

It was Ino.

She was bent over Shikamaru, and she was sobbing and shaking. Chouza was standing behind her, tears streaming down his face.

_He can't be._

_Chouji..._

Then he noticed Megumi Akimichi and the girl who was hugging her, the girl in the red top and dark skirt, her pink hair scraped back, a large scar above her left eye. She looked exhausted, but she was smiling. She came towards Shikamaru, and was saying something to him, something that he could not quite catch.

“Uh? Did you say something, Sakura?”

“He's OK, Shikamaru,” Sakura repeated.

Shikamaru noticed that Chouza and Ino were smiling through her tears.

“Chouji survived the operation,” Sakura continued. “Your son's very tough, Mr. Akimichi. A real fighter. Lesser ninja...well, they wouldn't have fought as hard as Chouji did. I bet you're really proud of him, aren't you?”

“Understatement of the century,” Chouza said. He bowed and kissed Sakura's hand. “I can't thank you enough for saving our son.”

Shikamaru slumped against the wall, gravity dragging his body downwards as Sakura's words sunk in.

 _Chouji is OK_.

Tears welled up in his eyes, as he remembered the last time Chouji had taken the red pill, while fighting a ninja from the Sound Village. He'd survived that time too, thanks to Tsunade's efforts. Now, it seemed that Sakura – who had one arm around Megumi and another around Ino – had surpassed her former sensei.

“Come here, Shikamaru,” Chouji's father said gently, and he drew Shikamaru towards him and hugged him, and Shikamaru broke down and cried, not caring who saw him.

Elsewhere in the hospital, Naruto Uzumaki was sitting up in bed, and receiving the news from Neji Hyuuga that he was to be the Sixth Hokage.

“Really?”

“Yes, really,” said Neji, suppressing a smile. “Shikamaru, Iruka and me are going to be your advisors.”

Naruto let this information sink in. Then he grinned and bounced up and down on the bed. “I'm going to be the Hokage! I'm going to be the Hokage! Wheeeee!”

“Oh, Naruto,” said Neji, shaking his head, “what are we going to do with you?”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

An hour later, Ino was standing in the interrogation room with her father, Ibiki Morino, and two ANBU members, all gathered round a naked girl with long red hair, who was lying on the floor. Her body was covered in cuts and bruises, and she appeared to have a curse seal. Ibiki had just finished applying a heated kunai to the girl's nipples.

“It's no use, Inoichi,” Ibiki said exasperatedly. “I can't get a single bit of information out of this girl.”

Inoichi explained to his daughter, “We found her on the battlefield a day after the war ended. An Akatsuki member, the only one who survived, apart from the traitor. We think she might have been enlisted by him as part of a quest to kill his brother, but it's been a nightmare trying to get anything else out of her. I've used our mind jutsu on her, but her brain seems to have been placed under some kind of shield.”

“If it's Sasuke Uchiha's doing,” Ibiki added, “it might have been something to do with that Mangekyou Sharingan he apparently has. Either that or Orochimaru got her.”

Ino shuddered, remembering what Asuma had told her about Kakashi Hatake's encounter with Itachi Uchiha, Sasuke's brother, and his Mangekyou Sharingan. The illusion under which he had placed Kakashi had resulted in the jounin's hospitalisation.

“The main reason I brought you here,” Inoichi said to Ino, “was because our numbers were depleted during the war, and we need new members. How about it, Ino? You want to join the interrogation squad?”

Ino nodded.

“That's my girl,” said Inoichi. “Your first task is to deal with that prisoner there. And I don't mean mind-raping her.”

“Understood, Daddy.”

“Come on, Ibiki,” Inoichi said. “Let's leave her to it.”

Outside, Ibiki confronted his colleague and asked him savagely why Ino had been asked to carry out the final task, when he should have been the one doing it.

“You've done enough,” was Inoichi's answer. “And besides, I think you need some time off for a bit. I'm not sure I'd be happy leaving her in your hands.”

“Why?”

“I think you know.”

“Anko?”

Inoichi nodded curtly.

Ibiki was silent. Then he said, “I loved her.”

“I know, Ibiki,” said the Yamanaka clan head gently. “I know.”

Ino stared at the girl with disgust and hate in her eyes. The girl stared back at her. She looked like a frightened animal.

Ino walked behind her and took the girl's head between her hands.

“This is for you, Asuma-sensei,” Ino said quietly, and cleanly, quickly, calmly, snapped the girl's neck.

 


	5. Spitz

   “Arf! Rarf! Arf!”

Kiba and Kankuro were both rudely awoken by the sound of Akamaru's barking. The big dog had placed his paws on the foot of Kiba's bed and was currently attempting to pull off the duvet. Kiba squeezed his eyes tightly shut, and opened them wide, while Kankuro yawned and stretched himself arching his back in a cat-like fashion.

“Dogs,” Kiba remarked as he rolled onto his side and swung his legs out of bed and onto the floor, “are the best alarm clocks anyone could have.”

“Except alarm clocks don't drool on your face,” Kankuro said, and sprang out of bed in one leap. “Kiba, what am I going to wear? My mourning gear is back in Suna, and I'm probably too big for most of your stuff.”

“You could wear your ninja gear,” Kiba suggested. Kankuro frowned. “My top isn't plain, though. D'you think people will mind?”

“Doubt it.”

“Where'd you put my stuff?”

“It's in a bag under my bed,” Kiba directed. The hospital had given Kankuro's clothes back to him when he had been discharged. Most of the time, he had been wearing a kimono lent to him by Kiba. Now, he got down on his hands and knees, flattened himself on his belly and rummaged under Kiba's bed with one arm, until he found the bag containing his trousers and hoodie.

“Don't bother with the face paint or the cat hat,” Kiba called, as he went off to the bathroom to have a shower.

“Wasn't going to,” Kankuro muttered. He sat on Kiba's bed, swinging his legs and waiting for the chuunin to get out of the shower, idly looking around him at the room that had been his sleeping quarters for the past few weeks.

Kiba was not a tidy person. His clothes were scattered all over the floor and sprinkled with dog hairs, a couple of books lay splayed out on his desk with the spines cracking, and new lifeforms appeared to be developing in one of the mugs on his bedside table, the blue paint of which was beginning to peel. _If I lived with Kiba_ , Kankuro thought to himself, _I'd make him clean up his act, the messy little sod_. However, Kiba's room was brighter than Kankuro's dark, somewhat creepy room back in Suna; after all, it had no windows, the furniture was pretty basic, and Kankuro could only take puppets staring at him with their lifeless wooden eyes for so long. When he got back to Suna, he was going to buy some candles and light the place up, give it a bit of life.

Mentally, Kankuro kicked himself. _It's a mass funeral today_ , he thought, _and you're thinking about your_ bedroom _? Get a grip, you fuckwit._ Presumably, Gaara and Baki-sensei, along with the Suna elders, had already led the mass funeral for all the Suna troops who had died.

He wondered how Temari was.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Shikamaru scraped his shoulder-length hair upwards into its characteristic high ponytail and secured it with a band, while Temari, her hair already done, washed her face. Like Kankuro, she did not have her mourning garb with her, but Shikamaru had suggested she wear the black dress she had been wearing when she came to Konoha. She turned off the taps and went back into Shikamaru's room and sat on his bed, her hands clasped in her lap.

“Temari,” Shikamaru began. He was looking in a mirror on his desk, his back turned to her.

She raised her head.

“If I cry,” Shikamaru continued, hesitantly, “I...don't get angry with me, will you? I know I'm a shinobi and I had emotional training, but...well...I'm not too...”

Temari reached out and squeezed Shikamaru's hand. He turned to face her.

“I'm not going to get angry with you.”

“You've changed your tune,” Shikamaru remarked, remembering the telling-off Temari had given him all those three years ago, the last time Chouji had been critically injured. “I thought you were going to tell me that it was inevitable that there would be sacrifices.”

“Yeah, well,” Temari countered, “you were a pathetic little boy who needed to grow up. I wasn't pissed off with you because you were worried about Chouji, I was pissed off with you because you were whingeing on about giving up being a shinobi because you hadn't brought the traitor back. You're not a pathetic little boy anymore. I wouldn't be going out with you if you were.”

Shikamaru smiled, in spite of himself, and sat on the bed next to Temari. She allowed him to put his arm round her shoulders, and leaned her head against him. She looked as if she were about to cry, but instead she closed her eyes and said, “Thanks for putting me up.”

“Don't mention it, darling,” Shikamaru said gently. The matter of Temari's rape lay between them like an invisible chasm; when Temari had first stayed with the Naras, she had recoiled every time Shikamaru reached out to touch her, pushing him away violently and covering her face with her hands, while Shikamaru fought back tears and told her again and again that he was not the rapist, that the rapist was dead, that he would never dream of hurting her. And Temari would tell Shikamaru that it was still too soon, and sure enough, when she slept, she would toss and turn in her sleep, sometimes violently lashing out at Shikamaru and crying, “Don't touch me!” Once, she sat bolt upright and screamed until Shikaku came in and gave her a sedative. And still, despite all this, Shikamaru and his parents allowed Temari to stay with them, letting her eat their food and use their hot water and visit Kankuro at the Inuzuka compound from time to time.

However, he was already noticing a change in her. Like the fighter she was, Temari was beginning to adjust; although sex was still off the agenda, not that Shikamaru cared, he made progress when she allowed him to lay his hand on her arm. A few days later, he could put his arm round her and even embrace her without fear of her shoving him into the wall and telling him to fuck off.

Temari and Chouji, to Shikamaru, were the epitome of survivors. Chouji was still weak, but was now in recovery and steadily gaining weight, much to Chouza and Megumi's relief. However, the Akimichi clan had lost many members during the invasion, and Chouji's parents had had to tell him the awful news. Shikamaru didn't know how Chouji was currently feeling.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kankuro and Kiba walked downstairs and out of the Inuzuka compound. Akamaru sat patiently, thumping the ground with his tail.

“Mum and Hana are already down there,” said Kiba. “We're going to stop at the Hyuugas' on the way. I told Hinata she and Hanabi and Neji could all walk down with us. Her dad went down earlier cos he's an elder and stuff.” Kankuro nodded silently, knowing that the Hyuuga clan had suffered several losses in the war. He was secretly glad that they weren't also stopping at the Aburame compound to pick up Shino.

When Kankuro, Kiba and Akamaru arrived at the vast Hyuuga compound a few minutes later, Neji was sitting outside on the steps waiting for them. He was mindlessly toying with a long blade of grass.

“Morning,” said Kiba.

Neji looked up. “Oh, hello,” he said, expressionlessly. “The girls will be down in a minute.”

“What are Lee and Tenten doing?” Kankuro asked. He remembered Neji and his team mates back from when they, along with Kakashi Hatake, Naruto and Sakura, had been sent to Suna during that horrible period when Gaara had been kidnapped by Akatsuki, and Kankuro had nearly died at the hands of one of them when he had given chase. Lee had been almost annoyingly hyperactive, Tenten sarcastic and impatient, and Neji solemn and somewhat exasperated at his team mate's unrelenting bounciness. That sensei of theirs had been not so much human as a force of nature, a human whirlwind in green, full of life and energy. And now both he and Kakashi were dead.

“Tenten's staying with us at the moment, her home's unfit to live in now, but she left earlier 'cos she wanted to check on Lee. She's going with him and meeting us there,” replied Neji, as his two cousins emerged from the Hyuuga compound in their black mourning dresses, Hanabi on crutches with her arms swathed in bandages, Hinata with a large bruise across her face. On seeing each other, Hinata and Kiba rushed towards each other and embraced. Hinata buried her head in Kiba's chest as he stroked her back and murmured something into her ear which Kankuro did not quite catch.

Neji slowly heaved himself up from the steps.

“You're coming as well?” he asked Kankuro, without looking at him. Kankuro nodded.

“Right,” said the Konoha jounin. “We'd better go. Hiashi-sama and Lee and Tenten will be waiting.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Shikamaru, Temari and Ino Yamanaka waited patiently outside the Akimichi compound – one of the homes that had not been destroyed in the war - as Chouji, his wild hair scraped back into a messy ponytail, finished off the last of his vast packet of crisps. He looked tired and withdrawn. Even the red spirals on his cheeks seemed drab and colourless.

“Your dad's already down there?” asked Ino.

“Yeah,” said Chouji, “doing his elder stuff. We're behind the Hyuugas in the procession, I think.”

Temari smiled at her lover's team mate and suddenly, without warning, bowed towards him. “Konoha is lucky to have you, Chouji. It's not just any chuunin who can take on a member of Akatsuki and live.”

Chouji blushed. “Couldn't have done it without your help, Temari-san.”

“Hey, come on now. You don't have to be formal,” said Temari genially, as Ino shifted her weight from one foot to another and wished she could wear her Interrogation Squad trenchcoat. The bloody wind was blowing up her dress. Chouji, knowing what Temari had been through, said nothing.

“Well, then,” said Shikamaru briskly, “let's get going, shall we?”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

As the funeral bell tolled, Iruka Umino stood on a temporary platform at Konoha's cemetery, his gaze wandering across the black-clad crowd of ninja and civilians. So many former students of his, people he'd known since they were children, congregated with their families. Neji Hyuuga, one of his best and brightest students, standing with his white-eyed fellow clan members to one side and his team mates to the other, Lee staring fixedly at a spot on the ground, Tenten looking worried. Shikamaru Nara with that fearsome girl from Suna – who he was going out with, if rumours were to be believed - and her brother, not the crazy one, the dark one who carried puppets on his back. Ino Yamanaka, now on the Interrogation Squad with her father, who was talking with Ibiki Morino. Chouji Akimichi, that slow fat kid who was now a war hero, looking like death warmed up and not shoving food into his face for once. Over half of his clan had been wiped out in the war. The ever-serious Shino Aburame, with his shades and his unchanging face. The Inuzuka boy with his mum and sister and their dogs. _Why did he keep glancing at that boy from Suna?_ Sai, the pale-skinned enigmatic artist who had replaced the Uchiha traitor...Iruka remembered the dark, brooding former student with a pang of sadness. Sasuke had always been one of the most promising students, had graduated despite the odds stacked against him and his horrible And there, near the front, were his two team mates; Sakura Haruno, the girl from the civilian family who had blossomed into a medical ninja and taijutsu and illusion practitioner; and Naruto Uzumaki, the former outcast, Iruka's ebullient former protege, the boy who had saved the village...and who would, a week from now, be standing on this platform in the robes of the Hokage. Since the day when he had stolen a scroll and single-handedly taught himself the _Kage Bunshin no Jutsu_ , Naruto had secretly been Iruka's favourite.

Here they were, most of them barely sixteen. And now they had come of age. They were no longer fresh-faced, eager little genin. They were chuunin and jounin, children forced into early adulthood by war. Iruka thought it was a miracle that all of them had survived, unlike the jounin who had taught them. Only Kurenai Yuuhi, who was heavily pregnant and subsequently on maternity leave, remained.

Iruka decided it was time to begin the ceremony. He walked up to the microphone and began to speak.

“Ladies and gentlemen,” he began. “As you are all aware, we are gathered here today to mourn all those who gave their lives during the recent invasion. Although most of Akatsuki have been eliminated through the bravery of our citizens, and our allies in Sunagakure, both they and us have paid a heavy price. Forever will we be in their debt, for it is through their courage, their strength, the Will of Fire that has been passed from generation to generation, that this village remains here today, and that the younger generation will carry on the great work done by the old, and in turn will raise future generations that will continue to cherish and protect this village.

“Our village is, sadly, once again without a Hokage; the Fifth Hokage, just like the Third and Fourth before her, sacrificed her life to protect this village and its people. However, be assured that her sacrifice, and the sacrifices of others, were not in vain. Nevertheless, she will be greatly missed by all of us, and I have faith that our new Hokage, who will be inaugurated next week, will care for the village just as she did.” He noticed Sakura's eyes were filling with tears, and Shizune had buried her head in her hands. He paused, then carried on.

“The bodies of all those who lost their lives have been gathered, and a list of names, which I will now read to you, has been drawn up. These are the people who gave their lives for Konoha, and for us, and we shall remember and honour them.”

He took a list out of his pocket and began to read.

Kankuro, stood near the back with his sister and the Naras, remembered the last funeral he had been to; Chiyo, one of the elders of Sunagakure and the founder of its Puppet Squad, had died as a result of transferring her own life energy into Gaara. Although Kankuro had not known her well, and had not shed any tears at her funeral – in fact, Kankuro couldn't remember the last time he'd cried – he had been touched and saddened by her sacrifice, although he was also cheered by the fact that she'd killed that bastard Sasori. _I'll have to start making my own puppets,_ Kankuro thought, lost in daydreams as most of the names that Iruka was reading at present passed him by. Then, Iruka said, “Kakashi Hatake” and Kankuro's eyes widened in shock.

 _I knew that guy,_ he thought, as Naruto buried his head in his hands and began to cry. Sakura drew him to her and hugged him tightly. Chouji's hands were shaking. Ino, remembering how Kakashi had willingly led her team to avenge Asuma's death, began to cry. Shikamaru stirred uneasily, and Temari, sensing his discomfort, gently stroked his back.

“Maito Gai.”

There was a sharp intake of breath from Rock Lee, as Tenten squeezed his hand. Neji clenched his teeth. He was not going to cry.

“Anko Mitarashi.”

Ibiki closed his eyes and fingered the engagement ring that Anko had bought him. She had proposed. They had had fantastic sex that night; she had been wearing dark red lingerie which Ibiki had ripped off as soon as they had entered his bedroom, and she had dragged her nails down his back, digging in so hard that he had bled. Their wedding would have been in three months' time, during her leave.

“Genma Shiranui.”

Raidou Namiashi bowed his head and struggled to force back tears at the name of his old team mate.

“Tenzo, also known as Yamato.”

Naruto wept even harder, remembering how Yamato had helped him train by controlling the Kyuubi's chakra, and how he had practically dragged Naruto to safety while Kakashi stayed behind to fight the Pein body. Yamato was alive when the medical ninjas found him on the battlefield, but had been injured so severely that none of the medics could heal him, and had died of his wounds only two days later.

Silence hung over the cemetery like a cloud, pressing down on the shoulders of the crowd, weighing them down like stones. Kankuro suddenly felt homesick, and wished Gaara was with him. He also wished he could hold Kiba's hand and comfort him and tell him everything was going to be OK, as the chuunin was looking visibly upset, but they were not yet at the stage where Kiba could tell his family that he was in a relationship with another boy.

Iruka broke the silence.

“Let the procession begin.”

On hearing this, as the bell began to sound again, the crowd parted to allow the procession, made up of those who had lost family, comrades and teachers in the war, to pass through. Shizune, Chouza Akimichi and Hiashi Hyuuga broke off from the crowd, followed by Neji, Chouji, Hanabi, Hinata, and the surviving members of the Akimichi and Hyuuga clans. Ibiki, along with Inoichi Yamanaka and various members of the Interrogation Squad, walked behind them. Scanning the line for familiar faces, Kiba saw Naruto and Sakura with their arms around each other's shoulders, with Sai walking a little distance behind them; Konohamaru, flanked by his team mates; Tenten and a visibly trembling Lee; a pack of dogs in blue coats, who Kiba recognised as Kakashi's Ninken; and several other chuunin and jounin. The dogs' tails were between their legs.

Eventually, the line reached the graves where their dead were buried, and the mourners broke off to lay tribute to the fallen. _Yamanaka's must be empty_ , Kiba thought as he saw bunches of flowers being laid on the graves. Ibiki, his face as unmoving and impassive as the statues of the Hokages, removed his engagement ring and laid it on Anko's gravestone. A couple of feet away, his colleagues, led by Inoichi, were laying flowers on the graves of Interrogation Squad members. Naruto laid a copy of _Come Come Paradise_ by Kakashi's gravestone, while Sakura and the Ninja Dogs covered it with cherry blossoms and lilies. Konohamaru, Moegi and Udon congregated around their sensei Ebisu's grave. _Poor Konohamaru,_ Kiba thought. _As if losing Asuma and his grandad already wasn't enough._

An almost lupine howl ripped through the air, sending unwelcome shivers down Kiba's spine. Rock Lee's nerve had broken, and he had collapsed in a heap on top of Maito Gai's gravestone and was unable to move.

“Lee!” Tenten hissed. “Pull yourself together!”

“NOOOOOOOO!” wailed Lee. “Gai-sensei! Gai-senseiiiii!” He clung onto the gravestone for dear life, his tears leaving tracks on it. Tenten gritted her teeth and began to attempt to prise Lee from the gravestone. Neji was intervening now, trying to reason with Lee. He said something inaudible, but whatever he said only served to make things worse; Lee was clinging to the gravestone so tightly, Kiba wondered if it was about to crumble into dust.

“I can't leave him!”

“Lee, please,” Tenten begged. “Is this what Gai would have wanted? Come on, now.”

Without a word, Neji knelt down and placed an arm gently on Lee's back. “We all miss him, Lee,” he said quietly. “And...he didn't die in vain. He died fighting, he died a hero's death. And I guess he passed the torch on to you, Lee, so you could continue where he left off and become a taijutsu legend just like he was. Keep him alive in your heart, you know?” He cringed inwardly. His words sounded so trite and hackneyed. But they did the trick, as Lee slowly uncurled himself and threw his arms around Neji, nearly knocking him over. Tenten stared into space, feeling useless and left out. Lee, she realised, would never be the same again. Part of him had died with Gai-sensei.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kankuro could not remember the last time he had seen so many grown men and women crying. Not even at the mass funeral held in Sunagakure, after Orochimaru sold the village out, had he seen such waves of grief. Watching the procession, with the heads of the Hyuuga and Akimichi clans leading it – along with a woman who, he'd heard, was the Hokage's assistant – he noticed that while the Hyuuga clan head remained upright and stiff, his solemn features barely changing, the Akimichi clan head was walking with his head buried in his hands. The guy must have been, what, forty or so? Yet he was visibly upset. Kankuro, to his surprise, found himself feeling sorry for the man and his family. Apparently a lot of them had been killed in the war, and only a few remained. It was one of the most bizarre things Kankuro had ever seen; this enormous beast of a man, who'd probably served in various wars, weeping into his hands like a child. He felt a small lump forming in his throat, and swallowed it down, reminding himself that it was not a ninja's way to show emotion.

 _Fuck off, Kankuro,_ a small voice whispered. _You know what it's like to lose family. You forget that these people are not mere machines. They're_ humans _. With emotions. Have a little compassion._

Chouji, walking behind Chouza, laid a sympathetic arm around his father's shaking shoulders. _Keep it together, Chouji_ , he said to himself internally. _You've got to be strong...for Dad's sake. For the clan._ Along with his parents and a couple of surviving clan members, he left the procession and headed to the Akimichis' section of the cemetery.

Kankuro was not sure where to look. He felt awkward and dull, as though he were a cuckoo in a sparrow's nest, sticking out like a sore thumb among the eggs. He shifted his weight from one foot to another, glancing now and then at the black-clad hordes who laid flowers and cards and forehead protectors and all kinds of tribute on the graves of their families, friends, teachers. Naruto and Sakura were weeping desolately into each other's chests, while the weird pale boy on their team stood awkwardly to one side. Chouji's stoic front fell away, and he broke down in tears, collapsing to his knees as Shikamaru ran towards him. His father was similarly being consoled by Shikamaru's father. Kankuro wished he could sink into the earth and wait till the funeral was over; he didn't know if he could bear this sadness, this heaviness, any longer. He wished it wasn't so sunny. The bloody light was hurting his eyes.

“Hey.”

He turned, and saw Temari standing behind him. “Hey, Temari,” he said with a wan smile. “Gods, I'll be glad when this is over.”

“Me too,” said his sister. “It's so...it's weird, Kankuro, I don't know any of the people who died, except Kakashi and Gai and the Hokage. And yet...it's hard not to get wrapped up in this. This village...even if you don't live here, they make you feel like you're one of them. Or maybe it's just me. Oh, ignore me, Kanky-chan, I'm talking bollocks. Been a long day. Shikamaru's been great, though.”

Kankuro bit his tongue and was about to say something when a horrible noise drilled into his brain. Kakashi's pack of Ninja Dogs were gathered around his grave: Buru the huge bulldog, floppy-eared Guruko, grey Urushi, lean, fleet-footed Uuhei, Bisuke with the tanuki's eyes, brown Shiba, Akino with the Shino-esque sunglasses, and Pakkun, the tiny little pug and leader of the pack. All eight of them stood in a circle with their heads raised to the sky, howling for the dead. Within seconds, the Inuzukas' dogs had begun to join in – followed by the Inuzukas themselves. Hana, Tsume and Kiba howled along with the dogs; no-one batted an eyelid, but to Kankuro, the sight of his lover and his family looking up at the sky and howling like dogs was horrifying, yet excited him at the same time. The last time Kiba had howled like that was when Kankuro had made him come, a few days ago, when Kankuro had felt well enough to go on top. Although he knew that Kiba was no uke, Kankuro always felt better when he was topping Kiba. After all, he was older, had fucked and been fucked by more men than Kiba had probably had hot dinners, and was of a higher rank. He was Kankuro of the Desert, son of the Fourth Kazekage and brother of the Fifth, and he was damned if he was going to be anyone's bitch, no pun intended.

Kiba, meanwhile, was unaware of how his behaviour might have seemed to Kankuro. All he knew was that Kakashi's dog pack were mourning the loss of their master, and that he was feeling the urge to lift up his head and his voice, and join them in their suffering, to show them that they were not alone. The dogs may not have been aligned with the Inuzuka clan, but they were dogs nonetheless, and Kiba's clan had a natural affinity for all dogkind. Akamaru howled along with him. No-one attempted to stop the unearthly sound of the human and canine choir. The howls of the dogs and the Inuzukas mingled with the sobs and anguished cries and murmured condolences of Konoha.

Shikamaru approached Kankuro and Temari. “Sorry I've not spent much time with you, Temari-chan. Chouji needed me.”

“It's OK,” Temari said gently. “You're just doing your job.” She took his hand in hers. “I'm tired, love. Is it alright if we go home?”

“To be honest,” Shikamaru replied, “I'm feeling pretty drained myself. I don't think Dad'll mind, and Chouji seems a bit more stable.” He turned to Kankuro. “You want to come back with us?”

Kankuro shook his head. “Thanks for the offer, but no. I'll hang around here for a bit till Kiba comes.”

As Temari and Shikamaru went back to the Nara compound, Kankuro sat down on the grass and waited patiently for Kiba.

After checking on Hinata to make sure she was alright, Kiba wandered aimlessly around the cemetery until he found his lover sitting on a patch of grass, absently playing with a twig.

“C'mon, Kankuro,” he said. “Let's go home.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

As the two boys lay together in bed that night, neither of them felt much in the mood for sex. They were too tired, too drained by the funeral proceedings, and in Kankuro's case, he could not stop thinking about Gaara. He knew he would be recalled to Sunagakure soon. It was only a matter of time.

The other thing keeping him awake was a memory of something Kiba had said a couple of weeks ago, when they'd had sex again.

_Kankuro...I think I'm in love with you._

Although it wasn't the first time Kankuro had heard someone say that to him, it was the first time he'd heard someone say it and mean it. While the other boys who'd told Kankuro they loved him were clearly saying it for the sake of it, Kiba was being totally sincere. He didn't know how he could tell exactly, and he was somewhat cynical about whether Kiba had the potential to commit – he was, after all, only sixteen - but his instincts told him that Kiba genuinely was in love with him. Moreover, Kankuro knew for certain that he felt the same way towards Kiba. Never before in his life had he woken up next to someone and thought, _I want to wake up next to you every day for the rest of my life. I don't want this to end. I want to be with you forever. Protect you. Care for you. Share my life with you._

_Love you._

“Kiba?”

Kiba blinked sleepily. “Mmm?”

“You know when you said 'I think I'm in love with you'?”

“Mmm?”

“You meant it, didn't you?”

Kiba laughed. “Course I meant it.”

“It's just,” said Kankuro contemplatively, “of all the men I've slept with, none of them have ever said that and meant it. But I, I got the feeling with you that you did, you know? You're different.”

“All the men?” Kiba asked curiously. “Um...I know this is kind of cheeky, but how many men have you slept with?”

Kankuro thought hard. Then he said, “To be honest, I've lost count. It's probably in double figures, though. If not in triple.”

Kiba's eyes widened. If he had been a dog, his ears would be standing on end. “Fucking hell, Kankuro! You serious?”

“Of course I'm serious, you fool,” Kankuro said with a sigh. “Ever since I was twelve, I've been fucking my way around Suna. Our sexual culture is different...well, there's so little to do there, you see. We...we mature early. We start early. You have a bunch of kids finishing training for the day, there's fuck all else to do...one thing leads to another. We end up screwing each other's horny little brains out. Honestly, Kiba, if I had a ryou for every cock I've sucked, every man who's sucked my cock and fucked me, every arsehole I've stuck my cock in, I'd be able to _buy_ the whole village.” He snorted with laughter. “We all started early in our family. Temari...dunno when she got laid the first time, but she definitely wasn't legal. Gaara...he was ten.”

Kiba gaped. He'd always thought Gaara was a virgin. He could never have pictured the Kazekage having sex with anyone.

Kankuro answered Kiba's unasked question: “He went to prostitutes. We've fucked some of the same girls – yeah, I tried screwing girls too, but it wasn't for me. I like the cock too much. The power struggle with another male. You're practically a dog yourself, Kiba, you probably understand what I'm getting at?” Kiba nodded. “Plus Gaara brought them home,” Kankuro continued, “and before you ask, no, our father didn't care. Not that he was much of a father to us, but anyway. Gaara was always bringing girls home. Probably scared them into having sex with him, knowing what he used to be like. Definitely girls, Gaara's never shown any interest in men.”

“I can't...imagine...um, your brother, having sex with anyone,” Kiba breathed.

“Well, he did,” Kankuro retorted. “Some of the girls I grew up with, the ones who aren't kunoichi, they became whores and a good few of them ended up being fucked by Gaara. It was a bit hard for me to avoid it, really, seeing as how I lived with the kid.”

“Gaara and Temari, do they know you're gay?” Kiba asked.

“No,” Kankuro said, and smiled. “A good shinobi always covers his tracks. Most of it went on at other people's houses or in the desert or, I dunno, alleyways in Suna or whatever. I'm amazed Gaara and Temari haven't found out. I do want to tell them, particularly now I've got you -” Kiba was touched when he heard this - “but I really don't think they're going to take it very well. At least, Temari isn't.” He sighed. “Gods, I don't know why I'm telling you this. I'm not even _drunk_.”

Kiba was surprised that Kankuro was telling him such personal things; the older boy had never opened up to him like this before. “It's OK,” he said. “It's been a long day.”

“I suppose you think I'm a slut,” Kankuro growled.

“Well, yeah,” Kiba laughed, “but you're experienced. More than me. That's good.”

“Ahh. So I _can_ teach this dog new tricks?”

Kiba shoved Kankuro playfully. “Your sense of humour sucks, mate.”

“Oh, go to sleep,” yawned Kankuro, rolling over onto his side.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

It seemed like the mass funeral was only yesterday; _and yet_ , thought Kankuro as he painted a thick purple line across his face, _at the same time, it seems like it was ages ago. Much more than a week._ It was the day that all Konoha had been waiting for since the announcement; today would be the day of the inauguration of the Sixth Hokage.

Kankuro was painting his left eyelid purple as Kiba emerged from the bathroom in his boxer shorts and immediately began to rummage in the pile of clothes on his floor for suitable clothes. Akamaru rolled out from under Kiba's bed and helped him, eagerly sniffing at the pile. Kankuro, who was surprisingly tidy for a teenager, rolled his eyes and said, “Do you actually use your wardrobe?”

“Oh, shut up and give me a hand,” growled Kiba. Kankuro ignored him and started on his right eyelid. Annoyed, Kiba began to throw clothes in every conceivable direction. A pair of trousers hit Kankuro in the face, smudging his face paint.

“Oi!” bellowed Kankuro, irritated in the extreme. “D'you mind? I'm trying to do my make-up, you idiot! You've gone and smudged it!”

“Go and do it in the bathroom, then, you girl,” retorted Kiba. Too annoyed to think of a witty retort, Kankuro gave Kiba the finger and went into the Inuzukas' bathroom.

Leaning over the sink, he ran the taps, washed his face with a piece of wettened toilet roll, towelled it dry with a reasonably clean, dark green towel that was hanging on a hook on the back of the door, and began to reapply his face paint. A purple line from ear to ear, crossing over his nose. Two further lines, one on each side, from the line across Kankuro's face to his jaw line. A purple triangle on his chin. He tried to keep his hand as steady as possible. Finally, he applied the paint to his lips, blotting it with another piece of toilet paper. He admired himself in the mirror, turning his head this way and that to make sure the paint was applied correctly. _Yes. Perfect._ No way was Kankuro going to shame himself by looking like shit in front of the new Hokage.

When he emerged from the bathroom, Kiba was sitting on his bed, swinging his legs. He had finally found his hoodie, a pair of dark trousers and the items that formed a part of every Konoha nin's outfit; his forehead protector, and his kunai pouch, attached to his leg.

“Fucking hell, Kankuro,” he laughed. “My sister takes less time in the bathroom than you.”

“Well, if a job's worth doing, it's worth doing properly,” Kankuro retorted, putting his cat hat on. “Now shift your arse, we've got an inauguration to get to.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Wearing the red and white Hokage's robes over his trademark orange and black tracksuit, Naruto sat on the desk in his new office, swinging his legs. He still could not quite believe what was happening. Somehow, it didn't seem real.

A voice behind him called, “Naruto-sama?”

Naruto nearly fell off the desk in shock, on being addressed with such formality. He glanced towards the door. Shikamaru was standing there; Chouza Akimichi, dressed in the robes of his clan, was behind him.

“C'mon, Naruto-sama,” said the new advisor to the Hokage (one of three advisors, in fact), “they're all waiting for you.”

Placing the Hokage's wide-brimmed hat awkwardly on his head, Naruto swung himself off the desk and followed Shikamaru out of the office and onto the roof. With Iruka, Neji, Shikamaru and the three new elders all standing behind him, he looked down at the crowds gathered in the streets below.

Konoha, the village he had been born and raised in, was a mess. Streets which had once teemed with life had become ghostlike. Where houses, shops, public buildings, bars, the library, the Academy had been, now lay only rubble and dust and broken glass, with sad little remnants of their contents poking out of the ruins here and there. Families who had lost their homes were being sheltered by those whose homes were still intact; he knew, for instance, that Konohamaru had lost his home and was currently living with Kurenai, his pregnant aunt, while Tenten, whose home had also been destroyed, was living in the Hyuuga compound. Although Tsunade and the jounin had done their best to evacuate all civilians, not all had survived. The rebuilding and repair of the village would take months, if not well over a year; the minds of the survivors would take far, far longer. In Hinata's case, it was becoming less and less likely that she would remain a kunoichi. In Lee's case, the damage was irreversible.

But Naruto did not want to dwell on the tragedies of the war; not at that moment, anyway. These people, these multitudes gathered in the street looking up at him, were his people now. The very people who had ignored him, regarded him as a monster and generally treated him like shit were now looking up at him with admiration and respect in their eyes, and in Naruto's opinion, he damn well deserved it. Ever since he'd graduated from the Ninja Academy, all he had wanted to do was win the village over, show them that he wasn't a monster and that he was just as good a ninja as anyone else...and become Hokage, just like his father. Sakura, Kiba, Chouji, Shikamaru, Temari, Ino, Gaara, Sai, Shino, Neji, Kankuro...none of these people had really liked him or been on his side originally (although he had always liked Sakura). Even though he'd bunked off with Shikamaru, Kiba and Chouji, he had never really considered them friends. Now, however, it was a different story. They were all, Kankuro and Temari included, smiling up at him, giving him the thumbs up, waving.

They were all his friends now.

 _I did it,_ thought Naruto, _I finally did it. I am the Sixth Hokage._

_I am the Sixth Hokage._

He knew he was going to have to grow up now, that he was going to have to keep his temper and not butt in when people were talking and wolf down ramen and swear in front of important people and...basically, to not behave in an un-Hokage-like manner, although being Hokage hadn't stopped Tsunade from getting drunk and losing her temper at times. He fingered the necklace she had given him.

There was one last thing Naruto Uzumaki had to do before he left his childhood behind.

Naruto leaned over the edge of the roof and waved down at the hordes of people on the ground below. Whipping his hat off, just like Tsunade had on her inauguration day, he held it high above his head and screamed, “ _Kooooooonoooooooohaaaaaa!_ ”

Silence.

“I am your new Hokage, your Sixth Hokage,” Naruto continued, yelling at the top of his voice, “and I am going to be the best fucking Hokage EVER! I'm going to make Konoha great again, you better believe it, and we will never go to war again because EVERYONE IS GOING TO FEAR US! Konoha will be the great ninja village ever! With Suna and Kumo on our side, and with me leading you, you've got nothing to fear – because I will protect this village, my home, with my life!”

He paused for breath, and the people took this opportunity to cheer so loudly that they could be heard for miles. The Inuzuka dogs barked, Sakura screamed, “ _Shannaro_!”, small children bounced up and down, Shikaku Nara waved his cane in the air, Chouji and Hinata wiped tears from their eyes, Temari wished that Gaara could be here to hear this, and even the stern Hiashi was smiling. Kankuro, meanwhile, took advantage of the jubilant crowds and gave Kiba's hand a quick squeeze. He hoped they would be able to have some alone time together later.

Kankuro knew it was a bittersweet day for Kiba, not because Naruto had beaten him in the Chuunin Exams three years ago – Kiba and Naruto had put the whole thing behind them ages ago – but because he and Shino and Hinata were the only members of the Konoha Eleven (besides, obviously, Neji Hyuuga, since he'd been promoted to jounin a while back) who were apparently still chuunin. All three of them had spent most of the war in hospital, and even though they all had kills to their name – even shy little Hinata, it turned out, had managed to kill an attacking Amegakure ninja with her clan techniques – they were not yet considered ready to become jounin. Still, Kankuro believed Kiba had the potential. It was definitely there.

Meanwhile, Sakura, Ino, Chouji, Tenten and Lee had been summoned by Shikamaru, and they were all congregating in the Hokage's office to be told personally that, due to their role in the defeat of Akatsuki, all six of them were now jounin. Lee broke down in tears at the news, while Shikamaru told his team mates that their parents had planned to take them – and Temari, too - out to dinner at one of the remaining restaurants. Although their old haunt, Happy Happy Meat House, had been destroyed in the war, Chouza had informed Inoichi and Shikaku that he knew another place they could patronise, a place in one of the less damaged areas. If Shikamaru was honest, he was glad, in a way, that the old restaurant was gone. It reminded him far too much of Asuma, and he was willing to bet that his team mates felt exactly the same way. _Considering what poor old Chouji's going through at the moment,_ he thought, _the last thing the guy needs is more sad memories._

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Maybe it was Naruto's speech, maybe it was something in the air; but all over Konoha, couples were having sex.

While their son slept with Temari in his arms – sex was still off the agenda, but at least Shikamaru could hold her now without her recoiling – Yoshino Nara's fingernails carved lines into her husband's back as he bore down on top of her.

Naruto and Sakura were frantically making love on the desk of the Hokage's office, Sakura with her skirt pulled up around her knees and her knickers pulled to one side as Naruto penetrated her. She linked her fingers behind his neck and pulled him towards her, further into her.

Kankuro and Kiba, finding a quiet grassy spot near the border of the village, were tangled together like snakes under the stars. Akamaru stood guard patiently as his master and his master's lover rolled around in the grass, Kiba nuzzling at Kankuro's neck as Kankuro thrust into him.

Megumi and Chouza Akimichi made love up against the door of their bedroom, Megumi's legs wrapped around Chouza's waist and her hands tangled in his red hair as he came inside her. Chouji himself had gone back to the house of a girl he'd met at a party he'd been to with Ino, Shikamaru and Temari, and who at present was straddling him on her parents' bed.

Tenten, who had been at the same party, lay moaning and writhing on the grass as an older woman from the ANBU, who she'd pulled earlier, ran her tongue up Tenten's thigh and onto her clit, while she slid her fingers into the younger girl.

Further away, Kiba lay with his head on Kankuro's chest, their naked bodies exposed to the moonlight. Both boys were exhausted, and Kankuro stared dreamily up at the sky in a post-coital haze.

He wished he didn't have to go back to Suna.

 


	6. Malamute

  “Mum, Kiba, there's some post for you,” Hana Inuzuka called, as she prepared to leave for work with the Haimaru Sankyodai– her trio of grey dogs – in tow. “It's on the kitchen table.”

“OK,” Tsume Inuzuka shouted back. “See you later.” She went into the kitchen and sorted through the various scrolls, until she found the one with Kiba's name on it. She picked it up and sniffed it, and recognised the smell; it was a combination of sand, dry rocks, leather, and something else.

Tsume summoned Kuromaru, her huge wolf-dog. “Yes?” he barked. “What's up? You need me for the salvage work?”

“Yeah,” replied Tsume, “but could you give this to Kiba? He's not on duty for a couple of hours.” She held out the scroll, and the big dog took it in his mouth and bounded upstairs.

Kiba was awoken by Kuromaru sitting on his chest. He made a noise that sounded vaguely like “MmmrrrggghhhstopthatAkamru”, expecting to find Akamaru being his usual enthusiastic self, but when he opened one eye, he was surprised to find his mother's dog on top of him instead.

“Kuromaru?”

The dog opened his mouth and dropped a scroll on Kiba's chest. “For you,” he said, “from Suna. Your mum asked me to give it to you since we're going out to help with the salvage operations. Don't forget you're on duty in a couple of hours.” He stalked out of the room, leaving a dazed Kiba holding the scroll.

Kiba also recognised the scent. He unsealed the scroll. The kanji on it were small and fine, and written in a very neat hand. Then he saw the name at the bottom, and nearly dropped the scroll in shock.

_Dear Kiba,_

_How's it going? I thought I'd write to you as I wanted to keep in touch. Since my brother / the Fifth Kazekage and your Hokage are very close, I get the feeling our respective villages will be doing a lot of work together. Gaara is definitely keen to work with Naruto as he feels our alliance needs to be kept as strong as possible. Temari is still village liaison, although it's pretty obvious she mainly does the job these days so she can shag Pineapple Head._

_I'm definitely on the mend – when Temari and me went back to Suna it took longer than three days because I could only walk a certain distance at a time. It's so embarrassing – you know what my sister is like. I'm almost fit for duty now, but my legs are still giving me shit. I'm currently working part-time, I'm doing a bit of teaching and hopefully might have my own squad soon. Gaara and Baki-sensei have both been great, very supportive. I'm trying to look on the bright side; at least I still have the use of my hands! I'm currently working on a new puppet as I need to expand my arsenal. The fight with Sasori made me realise that I need to build up the number of puppets I can work with. I will not bore you with the details as it's out of your depth, but I'm aiming to get up to one puppet per finger eventually. After that, who knows?_

_By the way, does your mum know about us? If this is going to be a long-term thing, it would be an idea for you to tell her. I know you're worried she'll take it badly, and believe me, I know how you feel. It's not_ illegal _to be gay in Suna, but it's certainly not something we really talk about here. But I don't want to hide it from my family. They will probably figure it out sooner or later anyway, so they may as well hear it from me. At least your mum knows me – it could be worse._

_It's so weird being back home again after staying at yours for so long. Thanks once again for putting me up, I really appreciate it. Although it's great to not end up tripping over clothes all over the floor or be woken up by a dog licking my face._

_I miss you. Please write back._

_Love,_

_Kankuro_

 

Kiba sat with the scroll in his hands, staring into space. He resolved to write to Kankuro once he got back home.

He dressed, washed his face, called for Akamaru, and together they went into Konoha to meet up with the rest of their clan, who were participating in the efforts to repair the damage done by Akatsuki and the Rain troops. Kuromaru, Akamaru, Kakashi's Ninken, and the Haimaru Sankyodai had been instructed to sniff out the ruins for bodies which had still not been recovered, while their owners began the arduous, back-breaking task of tearing down and clearing away the remains of bricks and mortar and timbers, which would then be broken down into smaller pieces and used for rebuilding, and salvaging any items which could be put to future use. As well as hammers and pick-axes, kunais, swords and all kinds of ninja weapons were being used to hack away at the rubble, which would then be passed down a chain of people to a series of waiting carts and wheelbarrows to be broken down.

When Kiba and Akamaru arrived at the designated site, Tsume was engaged in digging through the remains of what used to be one of the terraced houses on the outskirts of the city centre. It was the street on which Sakura Haruno lived, and she was currently being aided by Zakuro Akimichi, Chouji's aunt, and a couple of women from the Aburame clan, whose bugs were aiding the Inuzuka dogs in the search for survivors. Kuromaru was harnessed up to a wheelbarrow filled with rubble, while the Ashen Triplets were sniffing around in the ruins.

“Hi, Mum,” Kiba shouted over the noise. “What's Akamaru supposed to be doing?”

“Sniffing!” Tsume bellowed back. “Kuromaru's taking care of the heavy stuff, don't worry about it!”

The big white dog happily bounded into the ruins and set his nose to the ground. Kiba adjusted his forehead protector, and got to work, talking little to his mother. Armful after armful of rubble was passed down the chain, as Kiba hacked away and gathered what was left of the house into his arms. His clothes were covered in dust and his back and shoulders ached, while the roughness and sharp edges of the bricks made his hands raw and bloody, but Kiba persevered; he was, after all, fit enough and well enough to be able to cope with the work. Chouji, on the other hand, was working further down the road with his father and one of his female cousins, and having to take frequent breaks as he was still recovering from the effects of the red pill. Nevertheless, despite Naruto, Shikamaru and Chouza all questioning whether Chouji was fit to participate in the salvage work, Chouji had insisted on helping. “I know it's going to take ages for me to get better,” he had said, “but I can't just sit on my arse and do nothing. Everyone else in the clan's helping out. I've got two arms and two legs and I'm strong, that's enough, isn't it?”

“Yeah, definitely,” Naruto had replied, “but you're not going to be much use if you injure yourself and have to be taken back to hospital, either. Your safety is important.” He turned to the Akimichi clan head. “You're Chouji's dad, what do you think?”

Knowing only too well that it was impossible to stop Chouji once he had got an idea into his head, Chouza had given his consent, but had also agreed with Shikamaru's suggestion that Chouji take breaks whenever the work got too much for him.

Meanwhile, Kuromaru was returning from the sorting site to collect more rubble, while Zakuro had found bits of piping buried within the remains, and was passing them down the chain to be sent to the sorting site, where they would be stored and kept for future usage. Naruto had ordered that any piece of rubbish which could be deemed potentially useful in future was to be kept; toilets, plumbing, leftover clothes, broken furniture for firewood, and other such objects were heaped on the piles at the sorting site, to be reserved for the rebuilding of the houses.

After several hours, the day's work came to an end, and the next shift relieved Kiba's shift. He decided to go and see Hinata, who was working at a soup kitchen set up to feed the homeless families. He found her sitting on a rock near the kitchen, wrapped in a cloak and eating a bowl of rice.

“How's it going?” Kiba asked his former team mate.

Hinata nodded. “Not bad, not bad,” she replied. “I've been on with Megumi-sama.”

“Very hard-working, those Akimichis,” Kiba smiled. “Chouji's aunt was on my shift. Of course,” he added hastily, “your clan's been great.”

“Yes,” Hinata said neutrally. “So they have. I'm really happy for Neji.” Kiba noticed there was something different about the girl, and as his gaze moved further up her body towards her neck, he realised what it was.

“Where's your forehead protector?”

Hinata stared dully at the bowl in her hands.

“I gave it back to Iruka-sensei.”

Kiba couldn't believe his ears. “Why would you do that?”

“Because,” answered Hinata, “I've had enough. I don't want to be a shinobi anymore.”

Kiba was so shocked at the news, he nearly fell over. He steadied himself with his hand, and looked puzzlingly at Hinata. “But I thought you wanted to get stronger. I mean, you trained so hard, and you kept going on about how you were inspired by Naruto-sama, and you passed the Chuunin exams. I don't get it.”

“That was before the war,” said Hinata sadly. Her words began to rush out of her like water. “After everything that's happened to me, to the clan and the village...I don't want to be a part of it. I should never have been a part of it. I should never have become a shinobi. I thought it was the life for me...but I was wrong...when we were in hospital, and I saw all those bodies, all those people covered in blood and the missing limbs and the kids crying, all those people staring into space, and then there was the funeral, and I had to be in that procession. So many of us died.” She dropped the bowl on the ground, buried her head in her hands, and began to cry. Kiba tentatively put an arm around her shoulder, and Akamaru whined sympathetically and curled up against her legs.

Hinata swallowed. “What did we go to war for? All because someone wanted Naruto's power for themselves? And for that, so many of us had to die. That's all we're here for, isn't it? To die in some war over some stupid cause. If it hadn't been for Naruto-sama, we'd all be dead. And I hope he protects us, because I couldn't bear it...having to go through all that again. No kid should have to go through what we did. Poor little Hanabi, she's only ten, and they still sent her out onto the battlefield.” She laughed bitterly. “Of course, Father is angry with me. I'm bringing shame on the Hyuuga, he says. Because I don't want to be a part of...this _society of war_. And he's surprised? What does he expect? He never had any fucking faith in me.”

Kiba was shocked. He had never, ever, ever heard Hinata swear before.

“Hinata,” Kiba asked, “is it true...what happened to you? That those Amegakure guys...they...” He couldn't bring himself to say 'rape'. Hinata, however, had picked up on this, and nodded grimly.

“That bastard,” Kiba breathed. “Gods, I remember what Kankuro was telling me about Temari. They got her, too. If they weren't dead, I'd hunt them down and rip out their throats!” He took a deep breath, and swallowed. “Since it's true confessions time, Hinata, I might as well tell you something.”

Hinata looked at him with expectation. “What? You've quit too?”

Kiba shook his head, and said simply, “I'm in love.”

Hinata's eyes widened. “With who?”

“Kankuro.”

Hinata was silent for a while. Kiba began to wonder if telling her had been a good idea; after all, the Hyuuga clan had a reputation for being very traditional and on the more conservative end of the political spectrum, and he guessed that Hiashi would be furious if either of his daughters found themselves in love with a woman.

“Hinata,” he began nervously, “you're not...”

“If you mean, I'm not angry with you or anything, no, I'm not,” replied Hinata. “I'm just kind of surprised, that's all. I never would have thought you were attracted to men.”

Relief swept over Kiba. “I was surprised as well, to be honest with you. I mean, I've not really thought about the possibility of being gay. But then Kankuro saved my life that time, and then he came back to Konoha, and, well...as soon as I saw him I knew I felt something for him. Dunno if it was love, maybe it was just me being a horny dog, but it was definitely something. And now...I'm in love with him and I wish he didn't live in fucking Suna.” He stopped, and bit his lip, feeling like an inarticulate, naïve idiot.

Hinata leaned over, and spoke quietly so that only Kiba could hear. “You're not the only one in the village.”

“I'm not?”

“No,” his team mate answered. “You know Izumo and Kotetsu?” Kiba nodded. They were a pair of chuunin who he'd encountered at the Chuunin Exams a while back. They had also accompanied Shikamaru and Asuma on an ill-fated mission to capture two Akatsuki members.

“Well,” Hinata continued, “they're gay. They're going out. Have been for a while. I found out from one of my cousins who's a chuunin and does patrols with them sometimes. And I've heard rumours that Tenten's into women. So don't worry, Kiba. You're not alone. This goes no further, by the way.”

Kiba pretended to zip his mouth up, and squeezed Hinata's hand. “Thanks, Hinata,” he said gratefully. “You're a good friend. Don't tell Shino though, he hates Kankuro.”

“I won't,” Hinata said with a gentle smile. “You can trust me.”

Later, sitting cross-legged on his bed, Kiba began to write.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Four days later, it was Kankuro's turn to collect any post which may have arrived for him or his siblings. Shikamaru and Temari wrote each other regularly, and Gaara received correspondence from the Daimyo of the Wind Country, the other Kages (particularly the Sixth Hokage). Very rarely did Kankuro get letters; however, today was an exception. As the clerk on duty passed him a set of scrolls, mainly for Gaara, Kankuro noticed with some surprise that one of the scrolls had his name on it. He signed for the scrolls, thanked the clerk and returned home.

Dumping the rest of the scrolls on the kitchen table, Kankuro went up to his room and unrolled the scroll addressed to him. It had a Konoha postmark. He performed the unsealing jutsu, and read:

_Hi Kankuro,_

_Thanks for your leter it was grate to here from you. I hope you're legs heel up. Gud luck on the pupet thing i no its a big deal for you and your defnitly capable of fiting with lots of pupets. Im traning agen all the time with akamaru cos im sick of bein a chunin._

_I dont no wat to do about teling mum as she will kill me. Hana shud be OK but youve met my mum shes luvley but you wud not like her when shes angry. She mite kick me out the clan. Ive told hinata and she has bin grate. Shes givin up bein a shinobi and her dad is reely angry at her over it but she doesnt want to do it annymore. I think its cos of the war and wat hapend to her i think i told you she got rapped by some of the rane ninja and it messed her up. Lee has gone a bit mad too cos his squad leader died in the war he crys a lot. I havent told shino about us btw as he reely doesnt like you. He bares grudges._

_Naruto-sama wants to rebild the vilage and he has put us all on shifts. Me hana and mum are helpin with are dogs._

_Luv_

_Kiba_

Kankuro sighed, rolled up the scroll and hid it in his desk. It wasn't just Kiba's atrocious spelling that bothered him; it was the fact that Kiba was so clearly terrified of telling his mother that he was gay, and that, furthermore, he and Kankuro were not just old friends. He knew better than to assume Kiba was ashamed of him. Kiba was genuinely scared of his mother. As much as Kankuro liked Tsume, he could see why; she was a proud and fierce woman, the only female clan head in Konoha. _A woman in a man's world_ , Kankuro thought. He wasn't intimidated by her, having grown up with Temari; but he knew Kiba definitely was.

As he supervised a group of children who were sparring in pairs, Kankuro found that his mind kept wandering to Kiba, and decided he would write to him once class was over. Despite his hatred of children, Kankuro genuinely enjoyed teaching. He was surprised Gaara let him when he had put in the request, but Gaara had merely said, “You have some experience from when you were working in Konoha, and your work in organising and supervising border patrols here has shown your leadership abilities. As long as you keep your temper, I see no harm in you teaching the kids. Just don't lash out at them unless you really have to, Kankuro. I know you've calmed down since the first time we were in Konoha, but you still have a short fuse.”

Kankuro had not been happy on hearing this, but he knew his brother was right. The first time the three of them had been in Konoha, a small child – the Hokage's grandson, as it turned out – had bumped into him, and only the interference of the Uchiha traitor had stopped Kankuro from beating the kid up there and then. Having a psychotic Jinchuriki for a younger brother, who threatened to kill him if Kankuro so much as looked at him the wrong way, had made the Suna jounin swear off fatherhood; yet he could cope with teaching, because as far as he was concerned, he was training a new generation of young ninja to help defend the village and ensure that Sunagakure would continue to be a force to be reckoned with. Although Sunagakure was not on the same level as Konoha, it came very close in the power stakes.

Kankuro put a halt to his reverie when he noticed the sun was beginning to go down, and he called a halt to the sparring. He summoned the children over to him. He did not need to call for silence; this particular group knew that Kankuro was not a teacher to be messed with, and although they admired and respected him, they were only too careful to stay on his good side. On his first occasion teaching, Kankuro had had problems getting his class to be quiet, and had singled out one of the main troublemakers, attached chakra strings to his body and slammed him into the wall. Gaara had been furious with his older brother, and it had taken a lot of arguing on Kankuro's part to retain his job.

“I think that'll be enough for today,” Kankuro said to his charges. “You've all worked very hard. Don't forget to practice your hand seals for next session, OK? Class dismissed.”

The kids ran off, some of them calling, “Bye, Kankuro-sensei!” A couple stayed behind to ask him a few questions about the upcoming Chuunin Exams in Konoha, and if any of the current class were going to be entered. After they had gone, Kankuro gathered up his scrolls and went home, lost in thought.

At dinner, he was unusually quiet. Gaara asked him if he was feeling alright, were the kids playing up, and Kankuro replied that no, they had been pretty good, actually, and he was just tired and that Gaara was not to worry. Secretly, Kankuro was touched by his little brother's concern for his wellbeing, a tremendous leap given that, up until nearly four years ago, Gaara had been constantly threatening to kill him.

All that night, he had trouble sleeping. What would the kids' parents do if they found out that their offspring were being taught by a gay man? Kankuro knew he wasn't the only gay person in the village, far from it, but Sunagakure operated on a policy of 'don't ask, don't tell', and Kankuro knew that if the truth came out about his sexuality, there would be trouble for both him and Gaara, and he would probably lose his job and never be allowed to teach again. Kankuro didn't understand the logic. Presumably they believed that he would molest their sons or some such equally preposterous crap. Kankuro laughed quietly and bitterly at the thought; the idea of sex with children repulsed him, and besides, with the exception of the three genin under his care, he tried to spend as little time around the little bastards as possible. Of course, Temari wouldn't have to deal with any repercussions, given that she was spending more and more time in Konoha these days.

In fact, she was there right now, and would be returning in two weeks' time with Shikamaru in tow.

With a shock, Kankuro sat bolt upright, his eyes and mouth wide open, and he eased himself out of bed and switched on his bedside lamp. Sitting naked at his desk, feeling the cold wood of his chair pressing against his bare arse, he wrote another letter to Kiba.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

“Scroll for you,” barked Kuromaru, as he dumped a scroll with a Sunagakure postmark on the barely-awake Kiba's head.

After the big dog had stalked out of the room, Kiba eagerly unsealed the scroll. He hadn't heard from Kankuro for a while.

_Dear Kiba,_

_Just a short one as I've got a long day ahead of me._

_As you probably know, my sister's in Konoha at the moment on business (and to see Shikamaru, of course), and she's going to be coming back to Suna next week. I've decided I'm going to tell her and Gaara about me, about us. The sooner I get this out of the way, the better._

_I'm a bit nervous, but hey, I've faced worse. Here's hoping it goes well! I can always set Karasu on Temari if she gets arsey with me!!_

_Love from your_

_Kankuro_

Kiba sat in silence for what seemed to be hours, as the notion that Kankuro was preparing to come out to his family sunk in. Absently, he stroked Akamaru's head, and the dog barked.

“Akamaru,” said Kiba cautiously, “Kankuro says he's going to tell Gaara and Temari everything.”

“Arf,” replied Akamaru, and Kiba looked at him curiously. “You think I should do the same?”

“Urrrr,” said the dog. “Arf aow aow. Rarf.” Even though he and Kiba spoke different languages, the two understood each other nevertheless, and Kiba answered, “Yeah, you're right, Akamaru. I'll tell them.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Under the stars, sheltered by a canopy of tree branches, two lovers lay entwined under a pile of blankets, their hair loose and strewn on the forest floor, warming each other in the cold. In a few hours' time, they would be entering the desert that separated the Land of Fire from the Land of Wind.

“Hey.”

“Mmm?”

“How do you think they'll take it?”

“I don't want to think about it.” A slight shudder at the thought of those two familiar figures, one small, red-haired and dark-eyed, the other dark, stocky and temperamental. One with a huge gourd on his back, the other carrying a bundle of scrolls.

“He's not going to kill you, love. He's not like that anymore.”

“Ah, I know that. I wasn't thinking about him. It's your other brother I'm worried about.”

“Don't be. If he's a knobhead about it, it's his problem. Anyway, it's not like he can hurt you.”

“Heh. Don't be so sure.”

“If he tries anything, I'll kick his arse. That's a promise. Anyway. We've got two days' journey left. Better get some sleep. 'Night, Shikamaru.”

“'Night, Temari.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Hana Inuzuka stood at the sink in the Inuzukas' kitchen, washing dishes as the Ashen Triplets congregated at her feet, and Kiba sat nervously at the kitchen table, listening to his mother and Zakuro Akimichi talking on the doorstep. His mother was laughing her strange barking laugh at something Zakuro was saying. Aimlessly twisting his fingers, Kiba wondered how long the conversation was going to last.

After what seemed like hours, Tsume came in, pushing the front door to behind her. “Gods!” she exclaimed. “I thought I was never going to get away from her!”

“I thought you liked Zakuro-san,” said Hana from the sink.

“Oh, I like her enough,” replied Tsume, “she just talks too much and doesn't take a hint. She's always been like that. Me and Chouza had to leave the house if we wanted any bloody privacy from her. She walked in on us enough times.”

“TMI, Mum,” called Hana, while Kiba nearly fell off his chair. “Whaaaat? You and _Chouji's dad_? When was this?”

Tsume sighed. “Kiba, I thought you knew that me and Chouza used to go out? Of course it was way before you were born. A couple of years after I fought him in the Chuunin Exams. I'm sure I told you about it before. Or you'd heard about it, since the guy's shagged half the women in Konoha.”

“It runs in the family,” grinned Kiba. “Chouji seems to be with a different girl every week. I heard he got caught by his parents, shagging some girl on the kitchen table. Surprised it didn't break with that fat bastard bouncing up and down on top of it.”

Tsume roared with laughter, and barked, “The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.” Kuromaru snorted. “ _Mum_ ,” groaned Hana. “Kiba. Pack it in. You're disgusting, the pair of you.”

With a start, Kiba remembered what he had decided. He took a deep breath, dug his nails into the palms of his hands and said, “Mum. Hana. I've got something to tell you.”

Tsume spun round, her ears pricking up.

“You're not going to like it.”

His mother and sister waited.

“I'm...I'm...in love.”

“That's not so bad,” said Hana with a shrug. “So who's the lucky girl?”

“That's the thing,” blurted Kiba, “it's not a girl. It's a boy. A man. Actually, it's Kankuro. We're in love and we've been seeing each other ever since the war, and we've been writing to each other and...”

“You _what?_ ”

Kiba swallowed. It wasn't going as well as he'd hoped.

“Did...you...just...say,” growled Tsume, “what I thought you said?”

“Yes, Mum,” said Kiba. “I'm in love with Kankuro. I'm gay. I'm gay and I'm in love with a man, I'm in love with Kankuro.”

Kiba's mother looked straight at him, her gaze hitting him like a kunai between the eyes. He found his body beginning to contract and lower itself; if he had had a tail, it would have been firmly between his legs. He could have sworn she'd gained a couple of inches in height.

“How long has this been going on for?”

Kiba thought for a while about whether he should tell his mother the truth and hesitated. Realising that he had been in far worse situations, and that he had told Hinata to stand up to her father more times than he could remember, he decided to bite the bullet, and said, “After the war.”

Tsume ground her teeth. “You mean to say that all this time, when that boy from Suna was staying with us, under my roof, you were screwing him?”

Kiba buried his head in his hands, while Hana said, “Mum, don't.”

“Stay out of this, Hana!” Tsume barked at her daughter. She turned to Kiba. “Is that why you invited Kankuro to stay with us? So you could get your leg over? Gods, I can't believe I didn't even realise what was going on with you two. I raised you to be a dog, Kiba, not a little bitch.”

Kiba tried to intervene, but Tsume continued to rage, while Hana stood motionless at the sink. Kiba waited until his mother had momentarily stopped yelling at him, and said quietly, “Mum, please. I'm not a little bitch. And I'm not Kankuro's bitch. I love him. He saved my life, remember? We're all in his debt.” His eyes filled with tears. “Why can't you be happy for me?”

“What about the clan, Kiba?” Tsume asked. “Have you even thought about that?”

“What _about_ the clan?”

“What do you think? You need a dog and a bitch to make puppies, not a dog and a dog.”

Hana interjected at this point, saying, “Oh, for Inari's sake, Mum. Kiba's not your only child. The clan's not going to die out just because one member is gay. We're not like the Akimichis, there's plenty of us left. Kankuro and Kiba can always adopt.”

“No, we can't,” said Kiba miserably. “Even if Kankuro was a woman, we wouldn't be starting a family. He hates kids. He says he never wants to be a father.”

“I don't believe this,” Tsume said, shaking her head. “My own children are against me.” She stalked out of the room, Kuromaru padding along at her heels.

Kiba collapsed in on himself, and Akamaru whined and nuzzled at him. Hana came away from the sink and stroked her brother's back. “Don't worry about Mum,” she said gently. “She's just shocked, that's all. She'll come round to it eventually.”

“You think so?”

“Trust me.”

Kiba looked at his sister. “You're not angry too?”

“Of course not,” said Hana. “At least it's Kankuro. It could be worse. I admit I'm surprised, I always thought you were into girls, but I'm not _pissed off_ with you _.”_

Kiba jumped up and threw his arms around his sister. “Thanks, Hana.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kankuro was not pleased. Karasu was in need of repair, he had just come back from a particularly intense training session, and on top of that he was currently in talks with Nohiko Zahara, an older jounin who used to be friends with the traitor Sasori and who had been on the Puppet Squad under Elder Chiyo, about resurrecting the Puppet Squad. Although there were still members dotted around Konoha, the Puppet Squad had been out of action for a while now, and with Sasori's death, Suna had lost one of its main puppet manufacturers. Nohiko, fortunately, knew how to make puppets, and after Sasori's death, blueprints for puppets had been found in his abandoned workshop while it was being searched for clues regarding Akatsuki. It was going to take a considerable amount of time and effort to get the Puppet Squad back up and running, and this, coupled with Kankuro's teaching and sitting on the Suna council, was wearing him out. He wanted to go and lie down and read for a bit and then get on with working on Karasu, and a family conference at the table with Temari, Gaara and Shikamaru was the last bloody thing he needed.

“Is there any particular reason,” he said grumpily, “why you've summoned Gaara and me? Because we've both got stuff to do.”

“It can wait,” retorted Temari. “Shikamaru and I have something important to tell you.”

“What is it?” asked Gaara.

Temari laid her hand upon the table, and smiled coyly. Her brothers simultaneously noticed the ring on her hand.

“You're getting _married_?” Kankuro gasped. His sister merely nodded.

“Well,” said Gaara, extending his hand across the table, “congratulations.” He stood up, motioning for Shikamaru to do the same, and shook his hand. “Welcome to the family. I'm very happy for both of you.” He looked meaningfully at Kankuro.

“I suppose you're going to come and live with us?” Kankuro asked Shikamaru.

“That's the other thing,” Shikamaru said, with a small hint of hesitation in his voice. “Temari is moving to Konoha to live with me.”

It took a while for such a revelation to sink in, but when Kankuro realised what his future brother-in-law had said, he threw himself at Shikamaru. Shikamaru, however, was quicker, and, making lightning-quick hand seals, cried, “ _Kage Mane no Jutsu!_ ” Furious, Kankuro found himself frozen in place and shouted, “Shikamaru, you _cunt_!”

“Kankuro!” said Gaara severely. “Is this any way to treat your future brother-in-law?”

“How dare you take our sister away from us!” Kankuro roared at Shikamaru, who merely sighed and closed his eyes. He had known from the start that Temari's brother was going to be a pain in the arse to handle.

“Oh, grow up, Kankuro,” said Temari scornfully. “Gods, I thought you'd be happy. And I'm tired of living in a desert. You're nineteen bloody years old, try acting your age for once.”

“So I presume you're still going to be our liason to Konoha,” Gaara said.

“Of course,” his sister replied. “For the foreseeable future, anyway. If and when we have any children, things might change, and presumably Kankuro will take over the job. Plus I'm probably going to be assisting at the Chuunin Exams. But this is all some way off yet." She paused, then said, "It's going to be strange not wearing my Suna forehead protector anymore."

Calmly, Gaara questioned the couple further, his face betraying little. Shikamaru sat silent and let Temari answer. They had been seeing each other for a while now, at least two years, ever since she had become Suna's liaison to Konoha and had helped Shikamaru with the Chuunin Exams. They had gone out for drinks one night and one thing had led to another. Yes, Temari liked Shikaku and Yoshino (particularly Yoshino, much to the Nara men's dismay), as well as Shikaku's two ageing team mates, the elder and the interrogator, and their children. No, there was nothing going on between Shikamaru and Chouji. Never had been. Temari had proposed to Shikamaru after they had visited Asuma Sarutobi's grave. The first people they had told were Shikamaru's parents, followed by Chouji and Ino, both of whom were incredibly happy for both of them (Temari could have sworn she had seen a fleeting expression of wistfulness and longing on Chouji's face, but she might have been wrong.) Yes, they were planning on having children. Yes, they had had sex, not that it's any of your business, Kankuro. Yes, she would stay in touch, of course, it goes without saying, and yes, Shikamaru would give the Hokage Gaara's regards when he saw him.

Paralysed with rage as well as Shikamaru's technique, Kankuro decided to drop his own bombshell. “You're not the only one in this family who's in love, Temari,” he said, with a twisted smile.

Temari glared at her brother. “And what is that supposed to mean?”

“I've met someone.”

“Really?” asked Shikamaru. “Well, that's good to hear. Who's she?”

“ _He_ ,” corrected Kankuro, and it almost immediately seemed to him that, in that very room, time had come to a standstill.

“Anyone we know?” asked Gaara, deadpan.

“Kiba Inuzuka.”

Shikamaru's dark eyes opened wide with amazement. Gaara looked confused. Temari said, “You what?”

“He fought Naruto in the Chuunin Exams,” Gaara reminded her. “He's the boy with the white dog and the marks upon his face.”

“And I'm in love with him,” Kankuro said with an air of pride, like a small child showing off a painting to its parents.

Sensing that the Sand Siblings would need some privacy, Shikamaru relaxed the technique, freeing Kankuro, and said, “I'm staying out of this. I'll leave you three to it. Darling, if you want me, I'll be on the roof.” He left the room, the sound of his footsteps gradually fading away as he climbed through the small door on the ceiling onto the roof of the Sand Siblings' home. He wished he was back in Konoha; all this shouting was giving him a headache. Easing himself onto his back, he lay down on the ground and waited.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kankuro waited for the inevitable attack, the name-calling, the accusations, the threats of throwing him out of the family that he was sure would come. Instead, Temari merely said, “Oh, OK. There's no accounting for taste.”

Kankuro glared at her. “What's that supposed to mean?”

“Only that Kiba, if I recall correctly, is a bit of an idiot,” his sister replied. “But then, you did save his life, so I'm not surprised you ended up together.” She smiled. “Just like Shikamaru and me.”

“You're not angry?” asked Kankuro incredulously. Temari shook her head. “Of course I'm not angry, you fool. To be honest, I've always suspected you were gay anyway.”

Kankuro turned to Gaara and asked him, “What about you?”

Gaara merely answered, “I am responsible for the welfare of an entire village. I have the threats of war, poverty, rebellion, invasions and other such things to deal with. I have missions to co-ordinate and meetings to attend. Your sexuality is the least of my concerns.”

“So you're OK with it?”

Gaara simply nodded.

Kankuro breathed a sigh of relief and said, “I'm glad neither of you are angry with me. I was kind of worried you would be.”

“Why would we?” asked Temari, puzzled. “After all we've been through? Come on, Kankuro. You're still my little brother, regardless of whether you like men, women or both. And before you go,” she added, “I'd appreciate if you apologised to Shikamaru. You were pretty rude to him.”

“Will do,” said Kankuro with some reluctance, and he padded out of the room and onto the rooftop, where Shikamaru was lying peacefully, gazing up at the evening sky.

“Are you still angry with me?” Shikamaru asked, not looking at Kankuro.

Kankuro took a deep breath. This was not going to be easy; he hated admitting he was in the wrong, but he feared the wrath of Temari even more, so he squatted down beside Shikamaru and said, “I'm sorry for what I said earlier. It was out of order. I'm really happy for the pair of you.”

“Ah, forget it,” said Shikamaru easily. “And thanks.” He smiled slightly. “I kind of thought you'd take it badly.”

Kankuro laughed in spite of himself. “We're very close-knit, as I'm sure you've gathered. Temari and I have lived and worked together all our lives. We've been through a lot, you know? It's just a shock that she's not going to be around any more, I guess. It'll feel like...gods, this sounds so corny, but almost like a part of me is missing.”

“Oh, you'll see her,” replied Shikamaru, “since she'll be coming back to Suna now and then. Besides, the wedding's not for another year. Too much stuff going on, plus you and Gaara are invited, so we wanted to give you enough time to sort things out here. See if Gaara can come to some sort of arrangement, although Temari and I will understand if he can't make it. But we definitely want you to come.” He sat up and propped himself up on one arm. “So you can meet my family. I'm definitely planning on having a stag party, so I hope you'll be coming to that as well. And no, before you ask, I don't have a problem with you being gay. Come on, I was on a team with a boy who had very obvious feelings for me, and it didn't bother me in the slightest, although I'm not that way inclined myself. You are who you are and you love who you love. We're ninjas. We could be dead tomorrow. Our lives are too short, too _unpredictable_ to care about such...trivia.”

Kankuro felt his face beginning to burn, and cringed inwardly at his crude behaviour towards Shikamaru. This calm, sensible young man seemed an almost completely different person to the sulky, misogynistic slacker that he had been when he and Temari had first met. Moreover, he was no longer a coward. Kankuro had heard about how Shikamaru had singlehandedly fought and killed an Akatsuki member, and killed another in the Battle of Konoha with the help of his team mates. He thought of Temari's expressionless and pale face, the blood on her dress, her broken fan, the dim light of the makeshift hospital, how Shikamaru had held Temari's hand at the mass funeral and watched over her as she recovered from the war, and felt a pang of jealousy as he remembered how afraid he had been to console Kiba when he and his family were howling for the dead. _You arrogant fool,_ he scolded himself.

“How long have you been in love with my sister?” Kankuro asked.

Shikamaru's brow furrowed as he tried to recall when he had fallen in love with Temari. Eventually he answered, “Probably when she saved my life. When we were searching for...” He couldn't say the name. Kankuro knew what he was alluding to, and could not help but smile at the parallel between his and Temari's relationships.

He extended his hand. “Shikamaru,” he said, “I will be very happy to have you as a brother-in-law.”

“Thank Gama you're not playing the protective brother anymore,” said Shikamaru with a wry grin, and Kankuro laughed. “Come on, Shikamaru, Temari doesn't need protecting. She can kick enemy arse perfectly well on her own.”

“And that, Kankuro,” replied Shikamaru, “is why I love her.”

They parted on good terms. Kankuro decided to call it a night, and work on Karasu when he was feeling more energetic. The events of the past hour had tired him somewhat, and all he wanted to do was sleep.

 _One year to go until my sister is married,_ he thought as he drifted off. _The first wedding in our family._


	7. Deerhound and Canaan Dog: An Interlude

**Wednesday, under the trees on the outskirts of the Nara deer park, Konoha.**

Shikamaru pulled Temari's forehead protector over her eyes, knowing that they were finally at the stage where she was able to feel completely secure around him. It had been hard going, but Shikamaru's perseverance had paid off.

“What are you up to?” asked Temari.

“You'll see,” replied Shikamaru slyly. “ _Kage Mane no Jutsu._ ”

“This,” said Temari tersely, “had better be good. Or I'll beat the living daylights out of you.”

“Trust me,” was all Shikamaru would say, and Temari found herself walking in sync with Shikamaru as he led her by her shadow past the Nara compound into the land that lay behind it. She found her body following him of its own accord, not resisting herself as she knew Shikamaru's intentions were good. He took her along bumpy, barely-visited paths, around trees, through a tiny stream, taking great care all the while not to cause her to trip and fall over a stick here, a tree root there, the foliage gradually growing denser, squirrels and birds watching from the shadows, Shikamaru painstakingly making his way through the trees, sometimes turning sideways to allow Temari to pass through narrow gaps, until they came to the Nara clan's deer park.

He removed her blindfold, and released the jutsu. Temari squinted at the sudden onset of light and noticed

“We're in your clan's deer park,” she said.

Shikamaru nodded. “Indeed we are,” he replied, “and moreover, it's a part of the park that no-one visits. Look down. What do you see?”

Temari did as he asked her, and noticed something unusual; the earth was slightly darker than that surrounding it, and there appeared to be a series of cracks that had been filled in over time. She felt something vague in the back of her mind, like a distant but familiar memory, a name she couldn't recall.

It looks like some kind of tremor must have happened,” Temari said, partly to herself. “Maybe it was during the war, some kind of battle must have happened here...no, it goes further back. Something's disturbed the ground. An explosion? Something falling onto the ground, something heavy...Chouji? No...”

Then she noticed Shikamaru was smiling at her, and she felt a jolt in the back of her mind.

“You were right when you said an explosion.”

Temari's eyes widened. Shikamaru's smile grew even wider. “Yeah. I think you've twigged. It's the site of my vengeance for Asuma-sensei's death. The place where I buried Hidan...”

Shikamaru was prevented from completing his sentence when Temari lunged at him, knocking him breathless to the ground, and in a matter of seconds, her knickers were pulled to one side, his trousers were round his ankles, and he found himself on top of Temari as she spread her legs and wrapped them round his back, pulling him deeper and deeper into her.

“Shikamaru Nara,” Temari whispered fiercely in his ear, “I am going to screw your fucking brains out.”

She was tearing at his clothes, tearing at her own dress, ripping off his flak jacket and his shirt, digging her nails into his back as she arched her own back, Shikamaru realising in amazement that she was dripping wet as her cunt grew tight round his cock and she rolled over so that he was on his back and she was on top of him and she was kissing him fiercely as she slid up and down on his cock, angling her body so that her clit was rubbing against him, because there was no way Temari was going to give up until she was satisfied herself, and she fucked Shikamaru harder and harder, for he felt, even though he was the one doing the penetrating, that he was the one being fucked. He was being pulled along by Temari's rhythm, locked onto her and into her like a jigsaw piece, a kunai in its holder, as she leaned further forward so that her breasts were in his face and commanded him to suck her nipples, which he did. Temari's hips rocked. Shikamaru rather enjoyed being manhandled this way, and squeezed his eyes tightly shut as Temari ordered him to fill her as his cock moved back and forth inside her, and Shikamaru used what remaining chakra he had to send tiny tendrils of shadow to stroke Temari's clit and nipples and anus, ensuring no nerve remained untouched, and Temari's heavy breathing turned into tiny cries, and the cries turned into moans, and the deer gathered round to watch the two humans fuck.

Her fingernails dug further into his back.

Shikamaru felt as though his entire body was going to turn inside out, he could feel the orgasm building up and building up inside him; and soon he came inside Temari and his body went limp, but she wasn't finished, and even though Shikamaru's erection was beginning to die, he summoned all his remaining chakra into the tendrils stroking Temari's clit, until he felt her becoming tight around him like a fist, and she came, a shockwave running down her body from her head to her spine.

“Ahhhhhhh!” Temari wailed. The deer had come out in force. Large-eyed fawns hung close to their mothers. A stag scratched at the ground with his hoof, while another appeared to be nuzzling at a doe's neck. It was spring time in Konoha, the time when species of all kinds would be mating, and members of one species were the appreciative audience for the mating ritual of another species.

Shikamaru and Temari clung to each other, naked in the grass. Neither of them could speak. Semen trickled slowly down Temari's inner thighs. Shikamaru wondered if giving up smoking really had been a good idea; he was dying for a fag right now.

Temari rolled off Shikamaru, shivering a little. She eased herself onto her side and his arm slid under her neck.

“Well?”

“Mmm?”

“Aren't you going to say anything, Shikamaru? You're normally not short of words.”

“I'm spent,” was all Shikamaru could say, and it was like he was 15 and awkward again. Mentally, he kicked himself.

“I needed that,” said Temari. “I...really needed that.”

Shikamaru wasn't sure if he wanted to know why Hidan's burial site had aroused his fiancee so much. Temari guessed what he was thinking. She answered him.

“It just kind of sparked something in me, I guess. You...when we first met, you were, I'm sorry, but you were an idiot. A lazy, whining little misogynist with mummy issues, who wouldn't fight a girl, forfeited the Chuunin Exams because you didn't want to fight a girl, and then you fought that freak from Oto with the flute and I bailed your useless arse out, and in a way I admit I kind of liked you then because at first you came out with all that crap about girls, and it was so utterly obvious you were just putting on a front...but then...the way you looked at me after I killed her. You smiled at me. It was kind of a reluctant smile, if I recall correctly...but you were grateful, and that was good. For your sake, as you would have been next otherwise. And oh gods when we were in the hospital and Chouji was in theatre, and you were moaning on about giving up, you were doing my head in – I mean, look, I know you were upset. I know Chouji means the world to you. But after all I'd been through with my brothers...good thing your dad's a sensible bloke. And that was when you changed. You grew up. I meant it when I told you to hurry up and become a jounin, because I knew back then you were jounin material. And to hear that you'd fought an Akatsuki member alone, you'd kept your head and led your team into battle and made all those strategies...that made me love you even more, because you were catching up with me. No. You were my _equal_. You were someone I could be proud to walk with. It was like you'd proved yourself, you'd stopped being a whiny little boy and become an adult, a true ninja, someone who deserved to wear that flak jacket and that headband. A man, in fact!”

“Say what you're thinking, why don't you?” was Shikamaru's response. But he was smiling, and he took Temari's hand in his and squeezed it tight.

“Somehow,” he said slowly, “I always knew I'd end up with a woman like you. I always used to take the piss out of my dad. But now, well, you know I'm not like that. My dad said to me once, even the roughest woman is tender to the man she loves. And he was right. And you make me feel...safe. Protected. I know you are a stronger person than me, not just in terms of jutsu either, and that strength, that incredible _power_ you have, it's one of the many reasons why I love you so much. I guess it's in our genes, we Nara men like our women feisty and strong and, well, bossy and...”

“Troublesome?” suggested Temari. Shikamaru laughed. “Yes, troublesome. So very troublesome, indeed!”

“Gender roles,” said Temari dismissively. “Fuck 'em.”

 

**Friday, Happy Happy Meat Paradise, Konoha.**

Shikamaru looked at the clock on the wall of the rebuilt steak house and drummed his fingers on the table. Ino and Chouji were both late. He knew Ino's father had been training her in the Yamanaka clan's telepathic jutsu, but he had no idea where Chouji was, and frankly he was starting to get irritated. To pass the time, he ordered a glass of tea and sat and drank it slowly and contemplatively, wondering when he was going to start teaching little Koutei Sarutobi as he'd promised Kurenai, back when she was pregnant. Would he be specialising in illusions like his mum, or wind techniques like his dad? Should Shikamaru give Konohamaru the trench knives that Asuma had passed on to him, or wait until Koutei was old enough to use them? Konohamaru had done the chakra paper test along with several other ninja at Naruto's request – the Hokage had determined his chakra was of the wind kind by this test and found it fascinating, and Shikamaru and Neji had suggested it as a way of determining who would be suited to which missions – and it was clear his chakra was wind-inclined like his uncle's. But with Koutei, it could go either way. Given that he had Kurenai's dark wavy hair and red eyes, he could well end up being a genjutsu specialist, and the gods knew Konoha could do with more of them. _Whoa,_ Shikamaru thought wryly, _the kid's only two years old. Bit premature, isn't it?_

Half an hour later, Chouji came in and apologised. “Mission stuff,” he explained. “Dad and Naruto-sama and Neji were all talking about one in Kumogakure that they might be sending me on. It's B-rank, but they need a couple of jounin.”

“What is it?” asked Shikamaru, his curiosity piqued. “Surveillance?”

“Like they're going to send me on one of _those_ missons,” said Chouji scornfully. “That's more Hanabi or Ino's sort of thing. Speaking of which, where _is_ Ino? 'Cos I'm hungry and I can smell yakiniku.”

 _Just like old times,_ Shikamaru thought.

The door swung open and Ino entered, bunches of flowers in her arms, her vast trenchcoat billowing out behind her. “Sorry I'm late, guys,” she apologised. “Interrogation. Telepathy training. Yes, Chouji, I know, our dads are a pain in the arse. You're still not used to being the son of an Elder, are you? Are we going to have food now, Shikamaru, 'cos if we don't Chouji will probably eat the table, by the way here are the flowers, that's the other reason I was late. Had to pick your bouquets up.” She plonked herself down next to Chouji and handed him and Shikamaru the flowers.

Chouji was about to speak, but Ino cut him dead. “Look, I know you're hungry, but we can eat later. We need to get the serious stuff out of the way first. Then we can catch up, OK?”

“Did you read my mind?” Chouji asked. “You still in work mode?”

“No, you plank,” said Ino rudely, “it's pretty obvious, having known you for about eleven years now, that you constantly think about food. Moreover, this restaurant was where we used to go back when we were genin, when we were celebrating Shikamaru's promotion and other things like that, we've been loads of times, and you're familiar enough with the menu to know immediately what you're having as soon as you set foot in here, and it's always sodding yakiniku because you are just that predictable. _And_ you never let either of us have any, not that I eat meat anymore, but still...”

“What's wrong with me having the same food?” Chouji demanded. “I like what I like, Ino, and anyway you're a sodding veggie and you're always worrying about your weight, it's not like you'd eat any of...”

Shikamaru held up a hand for silence. “Alright. Quiet, you two. Let's not get the night off to a bad start, eh?” Immediately, Ino and Chouji quietened down, and Shikamaru summoned a waitress and ordered three small glasses of sake.

When the sake arrived, Shikamaru picked up his glass and raised it. Chouji and Ino followed suit, looking at Shikamaru expectantly. He sighed. “I said something the last two times. Couldn't one of you do it for a change?”

Chouji nodded. “Alright, then.” He cleared his throat. “As you know, we came here tonight because it's the...” He frowned in concentration and tried to count the years. “...third anniversary of Asuma-sensei's death. Since we came here all the time with him back when we were his students, you suggested, Shikamaru” - Shikamaru nodded solemnly - “that the three of us would come here every year, on the day of his death or as close to it as was possible for all three of us, to honour his memory. And I hope that we can carry on doing this, even when we're all married and have our own families, our own lives. 'Course, we have our own lives now. Shikamaru, you're teaching, and you're going to be married – once again, you're the first. Ino, you've joined the Interrogation Squad and you're going to be holding classes for potentially strong kunoichi – training them in the arts of seduction and stuff, if I'm not mistaken. And me...well, I've been supervising a couple of A and B-rank missions lately. And I'm due to qualify as an examiner for the Chuunin Exams next year, since they need new people and Anko and Genma are dead.

“And look at us now. The first time we came in here with Asuma-sensei, I remember he was talking about our dads, how he knew them when he was a kid, he asked us what we were planning to do with our lives. I dunno if any of us really knew what we wanted, except Ino, you wanted to surpass Sakura. I think I was probably thinking about seconds or thirds. Then that time when he told me I needed to eat less, train more. It hit home. Not 'cos of my weight, I don't care about that – it's 'cos I wanted him to be proud of me, I didn't want to fail him. I had a lot to live up to, particularly as Dad's an Elder now, but also 'cos he's Head of the Akimichi, and he was on a team with your dads, and I didn't want to be a failure.” Ino and Shikamaru stared. They'd never realised Chouji had felt that way.

“And now we're all jounin. We're all teaching. Shikamaru's promised to mentor Koutei, I might be getting a team in a couple of years. Shikamaru's engaged and he's Naruto-sama's advisor along with Neji. I can now hold my head high and know that I'm not a failure anymore, people take me seriously now. Ino's a medic and an interrogator. And I reckon you could give Sakura a run for her money. But we'll always be Team 10, no matter what we do, we'll always be Team 10. Maybe one day our kids will all be on the same team and carry on the tradition. But our dads are still active and hopefully we'll be too 'cos we've got more reason to be...” Chouji's eyes filled with tears. “After all we've gone through. You two are my nakama and you always will be. I don't want to sound up my own arse, but I know Asuma-sensei is watching us and he's proud of me and he's proud of you too and...and...” He could not continue.

“To Asuma-sensei,” said Shikamaru. Ino and Chouji echoed, “To Asuma-sensei,” and the three jounin knocked back their drinks, gathered their bouquets and prepared to make the trip to their sensei's grave, where they would lay their flowers. The sons of the Akimichi and Nara clans, and the daughter of the Yamanaka clan, the Ino-Shika-Chou trio. Shikamaru knew that Chouji was right. They would always be Team 10.


	8. Samoyed

**Sunday, outskirts of Sunagakure.**

Kankuro waited impatiently as Gaara and Baki continued their discussion of the Sunagakure security situation during Gaara's absence. He absent-mindedly scuffed his shoes on the dry ground, kicking up clouds of dust, and remembered what Gaara had said to him.

“Kankuro, the plan is as follows: you and I will travel accompanied by two teams of jounin, plus your own charges, until we reach the halfway point between here and Konoha. There, we will be met by a group from Konoha who will escort us for the remainder of the way. The reverse will happen upon my return. I will stay with Naruto, and he and I have arranged for you to stay at the Inuzuka place. And no, Kiba's mother did not object, as it was made clear to her that your temporary residence there was on Hokage's orders. I did consider asking the Naras if we could stay with them, but they are somewhat preoccupied this week with preparations for the wedding. On that subject, you and I are among the attendants for the bridal couple, and you will need to bring formal wear as well as your civilian clothes. As Temari and I would prefer you not to appear in your puppeteers' outfit, I have bought you some clothes for the wedding.”

“But who's going to look after the village?” Kankuro asked. “I mean, I know Akatsuki are finished, but we can't be too careful. There are still enemies and a village without its Kage is a vulnerable one.”

“Baki will act as Hokage in my absence,” replied Gaara. “Kentaro Takano and Matsuri will work alongside him in their capacity as my assistants, and they will be keeping close watch on the Elders. You needn't worry, Kankuro. You know Baki well enough and you can trust him. I certainly do. Besides, I will only be gone for just over a week. You can stay in Konoha for a little longer, but try not to go over your time limit. Your leave only lasts so long, and I know Nohiko will be needing you to train some of the new puppeteers.”

Kankuro could not help but worry about the fate of Suna with its Kage out of the village, but he knew Gaara knew what he was doing, and Baki was one of the few people he completely trusted. Besides, Sagi Akahara, one of Baki's children, was among Kankuro's genin, and the kid was definitely the strongest on the team. Moreover, he was gentler and kinder than his belligerent father, and was due to enter the Chuunin Exams next year. Kankuro fervently hoped Kiba wouldn't be leading his own team.

A month or so ago, before Temari had met with Shikamaru, Ino and Chouji and gone to Konoha with them, she had called her brothers together and announced that they were going to visit their mother's grave. She was a little apprehensive about asking Gaara, as she knew that, despite only being a baby at the time of their mother's death, he was the one who felt the pain of it the most, particularly as his conversion into a Jinchuriki was what had killed her, and Uncle Yasha, unable to forgive Gaara for his sister's death, had blown himself up in a failed assassination attempt when Gaara was only seven. Fortunately, Gaara agreed, and the three siblings found themselves in a semicircle around their mother's grave, not quite knowing what to say, each hoping the others would break the silence.

“When I was little,” Temari eventually said, ending the awkwardness of the moment, “I always imagined what my wedding would be like. I'd marry a jounin and we'd have a big wedding with lots of sake and lights and dancing, and I'd wear this pretty white kimono and flowers in my hair, and we'd exchange blood or something, and Mum and Dad would be there and so would you two and Dad would probably start crying and say something inane like, 'Oh, my little girl's growing up', just like he would when he went to my Academy graduation ceremony, not that he did, of course. But I dreamed he would and he'd be so proud of me and Mum would too, and everyone would say, 'There's the Kage's daughter, doesn't she look great?' Gods, what a little attention seeker I was.”

“I don't know why that bastard was in your fantasy,” said Kankuro with a bitter laugh. “He was never fucking there. Uncle Yasha was more of a dad than he was.”

“Enough, Kankuro,” said Gaara sternly. “Let us not speak of...that...person.” He spoke the words as if he were a child spitting out some foul-tasting medicine.

“Come on, Kanky,” Temari added, using her brother's childhood nickname. “I was only, what, six? You always think stupid things when you're a kid. Even if your mum and dad are ninjas, you don't really think that things would turn out like...well, how they did. You...you live in the present or in your own little dream world, you know? And Mum...I still remember her. It's hard not to. I mean, all I have to do is look in the mirror.” Her eyes filled with tears. “Yosh and Shikaku are wonderful, Shikamaru's lucky to have them even if he does whinge and moan about his mum, but they're not the same. I mean...I remember that day when I graduated from the Academy and all the other genins' mums and dads were there...and who was there to cheer for me? Not Mum, not Dad, not even Uncle Yasha.”

Temari felt the gentle touch of sand on her shoulder, while Kankuro squeezed her hand and said, “She'd be very proud of you, Temari. And Gaara. Maybe even me, I guess, although I was always the retard of the family.”

“Oh, shut up,” Temari said, and she smiled despite her blurring eyes. “You're not a retard.”

“I do believe she's watching us,” said Gaara gently. “I remember when I used to think she lived on through my sand. I don't think that anymore, but I still feel her presence, somehow, even though I never knew her.”

“Oh, come here, you two,” said Temari, and she pulled both her brothers to her and the three of them formed a circle with their arms round each other, and Temari felt the warmth of her brothers' bodies, Gaara's red hair tickling her face, Kankuro's gut, Gaara's sand, and realised how much she was going to miss them both.

“It'll be odd not having you around,” Kankuro said, trying to force a smile. “You'll still visit, yes?”

“'Course I will, you spaz,” laughed Temari. Then a silence simultaneously fell upon the three siblings, and each one of them said a silent prayer.

 _Please be happy for me, Mum,_ thought Temari.

She heard Chouji's voice calling for her, gave her brothers one final hug, and ran towards the trio of Konoha jounin.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kankuro was abruptly summoned back to the present day when Gaara and Baki appeared beside him, followed by his genin squad. As well as Baki's son, there was another boy, a taijutsu practitioner named Shigeru Asahita, and a girl, Kotono Harumichi, from a clan of poisoners who was considering joining the Puppet Squad.

“Everything's sorted now,” said Baki. “We've got the emergency messenger bird service set up, so if anything – Gods forbid – does happen, we'll let you know ASAP. All missions for the forthcoming fortnight have been allocated, and Matsuri's already started on the paperwork that needs doing. And border security's been stepped up, she's made sure we've got double the number of jounin on patrol.”

Gaara nodded, and Kankuro said, “Thanks, sensei. May Sunagakure be safe over the next coming week.”

“Well, if anyone does try anything funny,” Baki replied, “we'll be ready for 'em.” He smiled. “Give my regards to Temari. And have a safe journey.” He shook hands with Gaara and walked back to the Kazekage's building, where he would assume the position of acting Kazekage for the coming week.

Kankuro shuddered as he remembered the Akatsuki invasion, and then scolded himself. Despite its heavy losses in the war, Sunagakure was a tough village, and now more people were behind Gaara than ever. Baki knew what he was doing, and certainly, although some of the Elders distrusted Gaara and were afraid of him, others were on their side. _Stop being paranoid,_ he told himself. _Akatsuki are long gone. Besides, the Hokage has Gaara's back._

“See you around, Dad,” called Sagi with a wave to his retreating father, while Shigeru retied his shoelaces and Kotono checked her bag to make sure she was carrying a wide array of poisons to deploy, should she and her comrades run into trouble along the way. Kankuro heaved his pack up onto his back and said briskly, “Right, then. Let's get going, eh?” His students answered as one, “Yes sir!” and the little group walked through the tall village gates and out into the desert, as Kentaro and Matsuri watched from the Kazekage's building.

He couldn't wait to see his beloved Kiba again.

 

**Tuesday, Kiba's house, Konoha.**

As he faced the angry clan head, Kankuro tried to recall everything Kiba had told him about dog psychology in his letters. _Remain calm; dogs can sense fear. Maintain eye contact. Show them you are not afraid. And above all, stand your ground, do not back down, let the dog know who the master is._

OK, so Kankuro was dealing with a fearsome fortysomething woman rather than a dog, but given that the Inuzuka clan were so accustomed to working alongside dogs that they had subsequently adopted canine behavioural traits – why, this woman could scratch her ear with her leg, not to mention that Kiba seemed unfamiliar with the concept of chopsticks and preferred to eat his food straight from the bowl – it was hardly surprising that Kankuro was having to use the same tactics he would when handling a fierce dog.

He wondered if there had been something in the water when the older generation of Konoha were born. Upon his arrival in Konoha, he had been brought before the Hokage, his assistants and the Elders. Neji Hyuuga and Naruto had greeted him pleasantly, and he had exchanged words with Shikamaru. But the Elders...the shortest of the three, the man in the big coat with the moustache, had been friendly enough, albeit reserved. Kankuro knew that he was the father of that creepy kid on Kiba's team who had bugs in his body. The other two Elders, however – the tall, stern one with the long dark hair and pupilless eyes, and the enormous one with the red hair and the purple markings on his face – were another matter altogether. The long-haired man, who Kankuro knew to be the head of the Hyuuga clan, Neji's uncle and one of the richest men in the village, had been polite enough, but unfriendly and cold, and the red-haired one – whose son was on the same team as Kankuro's soon-to-be brother-in-law – was downright rude, and had actually said to Kankuro, “I'm warning you. I haven't forgotten. You dare stab us in the back again, and I swear to Uke-mochi-sama that I will rip your fucking head off.”

“Chouza-sama,” Kankuro had replied gravely, “Konoha are our allies, and Naruto is a personal friend of my brother. I assure you that Gaara would never permit a betrayal.”

“He'd better not,” Chouza Akimichi had replied coldly, and Kankuro knew that the Elder did not want to continue the conversation. He silently wished that the older generation would get over the Sunagakure and Otogakure alliance. Orochimaru had betrayed Sunagakure too, not to mention that thanks to him, the Sand Siblings were now orphans. Of course, it wasn't a huge loss, but Kankuro loathed the fact that he, Temari, Baki and the others had been played for fools.

Shikamaru had approached him afterwards. “Don't let Chouza and Hiashi get to you. They're still angry about the last war, they both lost a lot of family. And they have long memories. They both bear grudges. Good thing Hinata and Chouji don't take after their fathers in that respect, eh? They'll come round to you in time. My dad, incidentally, wants you to come over while you're here, since your sister's going to be part of the Nara clan now. I think,” he added with a mischievous grin, “Dad wants the claim to fame. Hey, I had the Kazekage and his brother over, aren't I awesome, that kind of thing. Him and his team mates are always trying to get one over.”

 _Thank the gods for Shikamaru and his clan,_ Kankuro thought. _At least they're willing to forgive and forget._

“So,” Tsume Inuzuka interrupted Kankuro's reverie, “how long have you been seeing my son, then?” It was then that Kankuro decided to use a coping mechanism he'd used in the past when he'd been in similar situations, and been forced to keep his temper.

He pretended he was an actor in a play.

In this play that was taking place in his head, Kankuro was a lone ninja who had fled into a forest where it was snowing heavily; he was hungry, he was tired, and he was on his way to rescue a young boy, played by Kiba, from a pack of ferocious wolves, the leader of which was played by Kiba's mother, with Kuromaru as her right-hand wolf. The only way to prevent these savage creatures, who had proclaimed themselves the young boy's protectors, from ripping him to pieces was to negotiate with them.

“About two years, ma'am,” he replied. “Although we were friends before, but I believe we officially became a couple after the war.”

Tsume's eyes narrowed. “Are you making fun of me?”

“No,” Kankuro answered, trying to keep his voice calm, looking Kiba's mother directly in the eye to show that he was not afraid of her. He knew he could not stare her down and had no intention of doing so. “I would not make fun of a clan head. I am a Kage's son; I have been taught respect and good manners.”

“Is that so?” growled Tsume, eyeing Kankuro up and down. “And yet you went and lost your temper on your first day of teaching. Not much of an example to kids, are you?”

“I learn from my mistakes.” Kankuro kept his head erect, his back straight, his hands behind his back, just as they had been when Chouza had confronted him earlier. Remember, this is the act where the biggest wolf in the pack challenges the hero. You must make your character convincing for your audience. Remember your lines.

“And what makes you think you're good enough for my son, then? Think you're better than us because you're the Kazekage's brother?”

 _It's as if she's looking right into me,_ Kankuro thought. So many responses he could have made in answer to her question! Oh, he was used to playing second fiddle to Gaara alright, and he had been made to feel by him like a worthless piece of trash, a poor ninja, a weakling, another potential target for Gaara's anger. And how the other kids in Sunagakure had looked down on him and Temari for having a monster for a brother, and how their uncle Yasha had killed himself out of hatred for the little boy in one last, desperate assassination attempt.

“No,” he merely answered, “I don't think I'm better than you...well, I rank higher than Kiba, but it's a matter of circumstance, and I am older than him. But that's the way it goes. He will catch up.” He smiled at Kiba, who was watching intently as he stroked Akamaru's head. He knew Kankuro could handle his mother.

Tsume and Kuromaru began to circle Kankuro. The big dog's ears were pricked up and he and his mistress were both growling audibly, their fangs bared.

“And what makes you think you're good enough for my son, Kankuro of the Desert?” asked Tsume menacingly, taking Kankuro's chin in her hand. “Yes, you saved his life. And I am eternally grateful. But this is one of the seven great clans of Konoha you're dealing with” - Kankuro could have pointed out that there were six, actually, given that all but one of the Uchiha clan were dead - “and not only are you a foreigner, but you're a homosexual. Such a union can't result in puppies, now, can it? Who's going to continue the clan when I'm dead, eh? And you use puppets, you go into a battle dressed like a drag queen. What kind of a jutsu is that? You trying to make your opponent laugh before he kills you, then?”

 _Ungrateful bitch!_ Kankuro wanted to scream. _I saved your son! He loves me! And don't you fucking_ dare _insult the puppeteers of Sunagakure! And so fucking_ what _if I'm gay? Why does it matter? Why?_ Why?

But he knew that if he made one wrong answer, the wolves would tear him apart.

“ _Answer me!_ ”

Kankuro's chin hurt. He was well aware that Tsume could probably do his face some considerable damage if she tried hard enough, not to mention that her dog came up to Kankuro's waist – and Kankuro was tall.

But what good is a shinobi, he thought, if he can't think on his feet?

“You might want to let go of my chin, ma'am,” he said gingerly, “for I'm not going to give you much of an answer if you're holding onto my face.”

Tsume let go, but she was now an inch away from Kankuro's face.

_My calm face is my mask. Inside, I am boiling, I am seething with anger, but outside, I am serene. I am not me. I am playing a character. And here is my soliloquy._

_I'm gonna knock 'em dead. Watch me, Kiba._

“Battle puppets,” Kankuro explained, “are a long and proud tradition where I come from. Your clan uses dogs, the Takano clan of Sunagakure use hawks, other ninja use swords or kunai. I and a few others fight with puppets. They're not your average puppets, either. We fill them with gadgets and traps, poison gas, tiny little needles, smoke bombs, razor blades. As Kiba might remember” - he winked at his lover - “my favourite jutsu is one where I trap my enemy in Kuroari, one of my puppets, and then impale them from all sides with blades hidden in the limbs of Karasu, another of my puppets, suspended in the air purely by chakra strings. You've got to have excellent chakra control to be a puppeteer, y'see. Forming strings out of chakra is hard, believe me. It took me many hours, days of practice before I was able to use them proficiently. I could barely control one puppet, let alone five! Plus you've got to be quick on your feet, and to use the transformation very quickly. I can't tell you how many times I've saved myself by swapping places with Karasu. As for my make-up...well, it's just something I've always done. It's my equivalent of your red fang markings. The patterns I use are based on kabuki patterns – I guess putting on my make-up helps to prepare me mentally for battle, just as an actor prepares himself for a play by putting his make-up and costume on. No, it's not because I'm gay. It's more because for me, battle is a performance, the battleground a stage, but don't let it fool you into thinking I don't take fighting seriously. I take it _very_ seriously!” Kankuro decided not to elaborate on the other reason why he wore make-up. He didn't think Tsume would approve of a transvestite.

Kankuro's gaze did not falter. He looked straight into Tsume's eyes, returning her stare. “As for Kiba...I'd like to think I'm good enough for him. He's funny. He''s full of life, full of optimism, which is pretty wonderful for a young ninja, don't you think? Even war hasn't got the better of him. He's not just a good lover, he's a good friend, a kind person; I'm sure you've seen how he is with Hinata. He makes me feel alive, Tsume-sama. See, I know I'm jaded and cynical and whatever, but with Kiba, I can forget myself. He's a lot of fun to be with, not that I see him often, but now I'm liaison to Konoha, hopefully that'll change. Erm...I love reading his letters, even if his spelling is appalling” - Kiba, unbeknown to his mother, gave Kankuro the finger - “and I don't mean to sound up myself, but I don't have to tell you why I'm good enough for him. It shouldn't have to be like that. That he is alive because of me is reason enough, don't you think? And sorry about the kids, but I don't like children, and anyway you've got Hana. And - ” he couldn't resist this one last dig - “I bet you're glad I'm not an Akimichi. Could be worse, then you'd be seeing the ex every day.” Kiba had told him about Chouji's father being one of his mother's exes.

He paused for breath, and started when Tsume lunged at him, knocked him breathless to the ground...and smiled and shook his hand. Kuromaru squatted on his haunches and wagged his tail. Kiba silently thanked Inari that Kankuro had succeeded.

“You've proved yourself, Kankuro,” said the Inuzuka clan head. “I was kind of worried you'd be some pathetic little bitch who'd retreat with his tail between his legs when the pack leader confronts him. But you didn't back down. You stood your ground. I can't say I'm happy about the gay thing, but then, you're right. There's always Hana.” She helped Kankuro up. “You're definitely good enough for my son.”

“Thank you, ma'am,” Kankuro said, and bowed deeply. Tsume waved him off. “Enough with the 'sama'. Just 'Tsume' will do. I'm not an Elder – and I have to say, I admire your nerve, bringing Chouza up like that. Gods, if Kiba started shagging Chouji...don't get any ideas, by the way, kid.”

“ _Muuuum_ ,” groaned Kiba. “ _Don't._ ”

In his mind, Kankuro was bowing to an approving audience, Kiba in his stage outfit next to him, Kankuro's hand in his own, while the wolves gathered around them.

 

**Thursday, Kiba's house, Konoha.**

“ _Itadakimasu!_ ”

Tentatively, Kiba picked up his chopsticks, slowly raised a scrap of pork to his mouth, and bit into it. The meat juices and a strange, sweetish marinade squirted out of the meat and trickled down Kiba's throat. He tasted honey, some kind of fruit, soy sauce. The meat was tough, just on the right side of undercooked. Kiba liked food with a tough edge to it. Slowly, he chewed the meat, allowing the flavours to linger in his mouth.

“Where did you learn to cook like this?” he asked Kankuro.

“I've always cooked,” Kankuro replied. “And no, before you ask, it has nothing to do with me being gay. I've cooked ever since I was little. I had no choice. Mum died, remember, and Dad was always busy and never had time for us, so Temari and I did everything round the house, most of the time. And besides, it's a skill every ninja should have, otherwise how are you going to survive when you're on a mission? You've got to eat at some point.” He looked at Kiba curiously. “Can you cook?”

“Not really,” said Kiba sheepishly. “I just eat raw meat a lot of the time, or whatever Akamaru's having. And when we were on missions, Hinata did most of it. Other times, we just ate packet food, ramen, instant stuff. You know.”

Kankuro sighed and shook his head. “Gods, Kiba. That's pathetic. Didn't Kurenai teach you _anything?_ ”

“She did!” Kiba flared. “Why the fuck would she teach us cooking? Did Baki used to sit you down every Tuesday and teach you to make the perfect ramen or something?”

“No, you pillock, it's survival skills,” Kankuro explained wearily. “I presume they teach you those things at the Ninja Academy here, right? How to make a fire, pitch a tent, be able to tell what is and isn't edible, make water drinkable, basic first aid, traps, that sort of thing. The very basics.” Kiba nodded.

“Now,” Kankuro gestured to the bowl in front of Kiba, “Eat. And don't wolf it down. Enjoy your food. You're not about to pack up and leave, you're not running from anything, OK?”

Kiba couldn't believe how bossy Kankuro was. Being a teacher and having his own squad had really gone to his head, it seemed. Still, the guy had a point, and he had gone to all this trouble, so Kiba bowed his head and concentrated entirely on his food, almost forcing himself not to wolf it all down in one go.

“ _Gochisousama_ ,” he heard himself say, and couldn't believe his ears. He, Kiba Inuzuka, the feral young ninja who could hunt like a dog and smell like a dog, who ate meat raw with his bare hands and could scratch his ear with his leg, was acting in a manner more suited to that of the noble clans? He wondered what Hinata would say if she saw him.

“Thank you.”

And Kiba realised how much Kankuro's appreciation meant to him, and how if, for just one second, he could make Kankuro happy and bring even the slightest hint of a smile to that hardened, scarred and cynical face, then he didn't care what happened next. He wondered if spending all that time around dogs had made him submissive. No. He was not submissive.

Kankuro glanced at Kiba. “You really are like a dog,” he teased. “I'm surprised you're not licking me face and all.”

Kiba leaned across the table and licked Kankuro's cheek.

“Stop it!” the jounin protested. “I didn't mean it literally.”

Kiba jumped up eagerly. “Can we spar?”

“Oh, do we _have_ to?” Kankuro moaned. “Can't I at least let me food go down?”

“Noor, yer caan't let yer fewd goor deawn,” said Kiba, mimicking Kankuro's accent. “C'mon, we can work the food off, and anyway you said you needed to practise your hand-to-hand combat. You said you're sick of only fighting at long range, remember? C'mon, c'mon, shift your arse!” Akamaru barked excitedly.

“Yeah, yeah,” Kankuro brushed him off irritably. He heaved himself up. “Alright then, I'll get Karasu.”

“No!” Kiba barked. “No puppets! And don't make that face at me!”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Akamaru sat patiently on the grass and watched his master spar with his lover. The two young men approached the fight in their own ways; Kankuro moved as gracefully as a dancer, while Kiba could have been a dog at play. The big dog wished he could join in the fun – how he loved to train with his master, to piledrive into Kankuro in a perfect _Gatsuuga_ – but Kiba had ordered him to sit and watch.

Fighting without puppets was an alien feeling for Kankuro; he felt like a shamisen player being told to stand up and sing. His hands seemed naked without the chakra strings flowing from his fingers. Nevertheless, he needed the training, and he had to admit that Kiba was tough, snapping at Kankuro's face, clawing at his body, flinging kunai everywhere. Kankuro had never fought anyone so feral; it was almost as if Kiba had taken leave of his senses. However, as a puppeteer, Kankuro had a keen eye for weak spots. Whenever Karasu had a joint coming loose, a wonky trap, a blade that did not come out immediately, Kankuro would spy it and fix it, and it was this eye for the tiniest of flaws that could help him, he realised. When Kiba rushed him, Kankuro twisted his body to the side, using Kiba's weight against him and knocking him off-balance before striking him with a closed fist. Finally, he was getting somewhere!

He and Kiba found themselves in stalemate, sometimes connecting, sometimes dodging or missing. Kankuro was getting good at dodging, at using his own body to block Kiba instead of summoning a puppet arm or leg. Not to mention that he also had the weight advantage, although luckily it didn't slow him down too much.

Kiba's sharp nails dug into Kankuro's arm. Kankuro bore the pain, but as he moved to hit Kiba he felt a horrible searing pain through his leg, as though a snake of fire was twisting inside it and trying to tear through the flesh, and realised that his war injuries were playing up.

“Stop!” Kankuro cried, holding up his hand. “My leg...I can't spar like this!”

And Kiba, instead of teasing Kankuro or giving him the puppy eyes, retreated and said, “C'mon, Kankuro, let's go inside,” as he offered the older man his shoulder to lean on. Gratefully, Kankuro accepted, and Kiba led him into the house and up the stairs to the bathroom.

Kiba ran a bath for Kankuro, making sure the water was hot, but not scalding. Kankuro kicked off his shoes and eased himself out of his clothes, wincing as the pain in his legs began to kick in, and Kiba, sensing Kankuro's pain, offered him his shoulder and helped him into the tub.

As he sank gratefully into the hot water, Kankuro felt as though his bones and muscles were turning to water. Back in Sunagakure, where water was more scarce, baths and showers were a luxury, and he had felt almost guilty for constantly taking baths at the Inuzuka house. He let his body relax into the water, let it envelop him, its heat soothing his aching legs and making him feel as though he was wrapped in a soft blanket. His eyelids began to grow heavy.

Kiba began to wash Kankuro. He knew that a man would put up less resistance than Akamaru would, and indeed, Kankuro was passive, letting Kiba scrub away with his washcloth. Kiba soaked the cloth in the hot water and washed the dirt and sweat from Kankuro's body. He lifted up Kankuro's arms, took care not to leave out any of the spaces between his toes, and even ran the cloth over his balls, cleaning every little crevice and hidden place between Kankuro's legs. Finally, he stripped off and climbed into the tub with Kankuro, and the two of them sat there in silence, both too exhausted to say anything.

Later, they had sex, and rather than the frantic, animalistic sex they normally enjoyed, it was slow, almost ethereal, as though the pair of them were floating through space, every moment like a drawn-out note. Kiba straddled Kankuro, taking great care to avoid hurting his legs by accident, bending his head to kiss Kankuro's neck. He knew the jounin loved to be kissed there. Kankuro was struck by Kiba's tenderness. _It must have been all those years being around dogs,_ he thought.

Kiba withdrew from Kankuro and rested his head on Kankuro's chest. Kankuro dreamily stroked his hair.

“Why do you love me, Kiba?”

“Mmmmwhassatkankuro?”

Kankuro repeated the question. “Why do you love me, Kiba?”

“'Cos you smell nice.”

“Ha bloody ha,” deadpanned Kankuro.

“No,” said Kiba, “I'm serious. I love your smell. I love your cooking. I love your sense of humour, the way you stood your ground when Mum had a go at you, I love watching you make your puppets dance, I love waking up next to you in the morning. I love you because you don't talk down to me, you're brave...and you're fun...I can...I can have a laugh with you. And I can talk to you. And I love this” - he reached up to touch Kankuro's prominent nose - “and this” - he touched Kankuro's mouth and ran his finger down his chin and then down Kankuro's body, pausing as it landed on the scar on his stomach - “and this” - he stroked Kankuro's fingers with his other hand - “and this” - moving down Kankuro's body and settling between his thighs. “Especially this. Oh gods, Kankuro, I don't _know_. I just _do_.”

And oddly, Kankuro was satisfied.

 

**Saturday, Shikamaru's stag night, Konoha.**

“My round,” announced Kiba. “What're you having, Shikamaru?”

“I think I'll just have tea,” Shikamaru replied. “I know, I know, it's my last night as a single man, but I don't want to turn up to the ceremony tomorrow with a hangover. If Temari doesn't kill me, Mum will.”

“Where is your mum, anyway?” asked Shino, as Kiba went off to the bar with Akamaru trotting at his heels. The bar normally did not allow dogs, but as the Hokage had requested to borrow it for the night, entry had been granted to Kiba's canine comrade.

“Down at the hot springs with Dad, Chouza-sama and Megumi, and Inoichi and Ayame,” replied Shikamaru, “which means, if I know Dad, he's definitely going to be hungover.” He sighed. “Bloody parents, eh. What are they like?”

“At least your dad doesn't vet people,” sighed Chouji. “Mine does. Every potential girlfriend I have has to eat dinner with us. If they don't like their food, it's curtains for them. I brought one girl home and she refused everything Mum offered her except salad. I thought Dad was going to twat her.”

“Could be worse,” said Shikamaru. “Ino told me she brought some guy home, and he got into an argument with Inoichi and Inoichi mindraped him.”

“How awkward it must be,” mused Neji Hyuuga, “having a father who can read one's mind.”

Kankuro was tempted to say, “At least you all have fathers”, but did not want to spoil the mood, and besides, could his father _really_ have been called a father, except in the most literal sense of the word? Moreover, he knew that he was generalising; both the Hokage, who was presently chatting to Rock Lee and Konohamaru Sarutobi, and Neji were fatherless. Besides, Chouji had, according to Kiba, lost a large amount of relatives in the war. Kankuro decided to talk to him. From the few times they had met, he liked Chouji; despite being the son of that rude Elder with the red hair, a member of Konoha's nobility and a war hero to boot, he was surprisingly level-headed and down to earth.

“So,” he offered, “how do you feel about Shikamaru getting married?”

Chouji thought long and hard. Then he offered, “Ami...ama...what's that word that means when you feel two things at once?”

“Ambivalent?”

“Yeah. That. I'm happy for him, 'course I am. He's my best mate. And I like your sister, she's cool. She's just his type. But...at the same time...I feel kind of sad 'cos I never got to tell him...you know...Gods, so hard to...say this. Hmm. Ah, you'll probably forget it tomorrow. I loved him, Kankuro. I loved Shikamaru.”

Before he even realised what he was saying, Kankuro asked, “So you like men?”

“Yes, but I don't see men or women,” said Chouji. “I see people.” Kankuro couldn't help but smile.

“I'm sorry about Dad,” the younger man continued. “Shikamaru told me he was pretty arsey with you. Don't take it personally. He's angry about the war, about everything that happened with Orochimaru back when we were all genin.” He smiled sadly. “I kind of miss those days. I didn't know war back then, I didn't have to watch my teacher die in front of me. The only funeral I remember was the Third's. But that's being a ninja for you, I guess. We have to be adults before we _are_ adults.”

Kankuro nodded grimly. Watching Chouji absent-mindedly play with a strand of hair, he remembered all those years in Suna of relentless training, the sun beating down on him, the burning sand getting in his eyes, his father yelling, Gaara's cold stare following him. All those times he'd spent sitting in his bedroom, nurturing the chakra strings that grew out of his fingers. The exams, the sparring with Temari, how he'd kicked and punched and manipulated his way into the graduating group, how Baki had become a surrogate father due to the Kazekage's neglect. Kankuro remembered the first time he'd seen Chouji, and was unable to reconcile that tubby little kid with the weird forehead protector and the long scarf and the bag of crisps that permanently seemed to be in his hand with the young man in the red armoured tunic sitting next to him, his almost-waist length hair in a ponytail, his baby fat converted to solid muscle.

“Oh really?” he heard Chouji say, and realised he had just thought out loud. Shit, Kankuro wailed silently, remembering how badly Chouji had reacted in the past when people had mentioned his weight. He's going to blow his top.

But to his surprise, Chouji remained calm, popped a piece of gum in his mouth, and offered the pack to Kankuro. “No, ta,” Kankuro replied. He took a long drink from his pint and added, “Y'know, I thought you were going to beat the shit out of me. I thought I was going to have to get my puppets out.”

Chouji raised an eyebrow. “You did, did you?”

“Weeell,” Kankuro admitted, “I thought your weight was a taboo.”

In response, Chouji blew a bubble the size of a grapefruit. Kankuro had the urge to poke his finger into it, but decided not to. Chouji peeled the gum off his lips, popped it back into his mouth and said, “I've grown out of all that now. To be honest, Kankuro, I can't be arsed losing my temper over people calling me fat. Yes, it pisses me off. But I've got to control my temper. If I lose it over something stupid like that, what kind of a shinobi am I?” He smiled. “Actually, you know what I thought when I first saw you?”

“What?”

“I thought you were a girl.”

At this, Kankuro snorted with laughter and sprayed a large jet of beer out of his nose.

Elsewhere, the Hokage was remembering the day he and Jiraiya had returned from three years of training, and how two of the first people he'd met upon reporting back to his predecessor were Shikamaru and Temari. “I always knew there was something going on between you two,” Naruto said as Neji played with an olive stone and Shikamaru nursed his fifth cup of tea. “You said she was there on business from Suna for the Chuunin Exams, didn't you? It was so obvious that wasn't why she was there.”

Shikamaru sighed. “Naruto-sama, Temari was in the village purely for the Chuunin Exams and nothing else. We weren't a couple back then.”

“Will you drop the 'sir'?” Naruto growled. “We've been mates for years, you don't have to start acting all formal with me.”

“But you're the Hokage!” protested Neji. “We don't want to insult you.”

“I'm not insulted,” retorted the Hokage. “Just call me Naruto, alright? And call my fi-I mean, Sakura just 'Sakura'. You're not just my advisors, you're my mates. And I'll still treat you as such. Neji, you want another drink?”

 _Can it be true?_ Shikamaru wondered. _Naruto and Sakura are engaged?_

“Flirting with Chouji, are you?” Kiba growled, mock-punching Kankuro's head. “You big slut.”

“Oh, pack it in, Kiba,” replied Chouji. “Gods, listen to yourself, you sound like a fucking girl. You going to ring Ino up and ask her for advice on shoes?”

“Why, do you do that?” Kiba teased Chouji. He put on a posh accent. “Ew, Ino dahling, whawt shoes shall Ay bay? Ew farking hell, thewse shoes ah sew nawt may culahh.”

“I don't talk like that!” Chouji protested, laughing in spite of myself. He began to impersonate Kiba. “Ow fackin 'ell, Akamahru, you've fackin' crapped on der carpit, you fackin' cahnt.”

“Or advice on dating,” Kankuro chimed in. “Since you might end up getting your knob bitten off by Kiba's mum...”

Chouji and Kiba both turned on him, and Akamaru barked and thumped the table with his tail as the three men dogpiled on each other. Naruto shouted, “Get a room!” Shikamaru snorted, Neji smiled in spite of himself, and Shino wished his team mate wasn't so damned immature. Shikamaru, Chouji, Neji, even Naruto himself had grown up. Well, Naruto was in charge of a village, he had to. But Kiba...he shook his head. Kiba had known war, and he was still a child at heart. He was never going to be promoted to jounin at this rate. Shino was still bitter about the fact that of the Konoha 11, Team 8 were the only team who remained at chuunin rank. While Team 10 and Team Gai had been out on the battlefield, Team 8 had spent most of the war in hospital. OK, so Lee had Ninja Syndrome as a result of Gai's death, Neji's hand was deformed, Shikamaru's fiancee had been raped and his father crippled, several Akimichis and Hyuugas had lost their lives and Chouji had nearly been killed, but at least they had fought to defend their village. They'd taken on Akatsuki members and won. In fact, Chouji, the boy who'd once been the butt of everyone's jokes, had single-handedly killed an Akatsuki member. And what had Team 8 done? Nothing. Hinata raped and unconscious, Kiba fallen prey to an illusion, Shino ambushed and stabbed repeatedly by a group of Rain ninja. All of them lying in hospital while the action went on outside. Even the prestige of being an Elder's son couldn't compensate for the fact that he was falling behind, despite being one of the strongest members of that group. So many times he had hoped to make something of himself, but the opportunity had always been snatched from him at the last minute. Kankuro's poison gas. Being called away for training with his father. Tobi, the Akatsuki leader, teleporting to safety from Shino's bugs. Rain ninja digging their swords into his body, and even the bugs couldn't stop them.

And now, apparently, there was something going on between Kiba and that loudmouthed idiot from Sunagakure who Shino had fought all those years ago in the forest, making up for his opponent forfeiting the Chuunin Exams. Kankuro had struck him as arrogant, all big words and theatrical gestures, but had been taken in in the end by Shino's bugs eating away at his chakra strings, getting into every joint of his puppet – although not without poisoning Shino in the process. And here he was, still as cocky as ever. Some people never changed, it seemed.

Shino would never have guessed Kiba was gay; it came as a surprise to him that Kiba was this way inclined. He didn't particularly care one way or the other whether Kiba was gay or straight, it was the fact that he was going out with Kankuro of all people. Shino was not in the slightest bit jealous – he had his eye on a girl in the ANBU – but no matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't feel happy for Kiba.

Particularly as seeing them together reminded him of that mission to find Sasuke Uchiha, the one where Naruto, Neji and Chouji had suffered horrific injuries and been on the brink of death, and where the Kazekage and his siblings had had to save the retrieval team. Shino wondered if things would have been different if he'd gone on the mission as well. Maybe there would have been no need for Kankuro to come and bail Kiba out.

It was all in the past now. He knew he shouldn't bear grudges, that Kankuro was an ally, but it was easier said than done. Every time Shino saw him, he was reminded of his failure to live up to his reputation as the strongest on Team 8, his failure to prove himself, and his failure to get on with Kiba. It wasn't that the two hated each other; they were two caterpillars crawling in different directions, one green, one red. Their friendship with Hinata and being on Team 8 was the only thing they had in common. The other three teams were still close; Naruto and Sakura might have found Sai a bit weird and rude at first, but they had bonded with him eventually, Neji and Tenten had rallied round to support Lee when he had a major depressive episode after Gai's death, and Team 10 had always been close. But Team 8...

“Shino?” Kiba was waving his hand in front of his team mate's eyes. “You there?”

Shino returned to Earth and said, “Oh, sorry, Kiba. I've just got a lot on my mind. I'd better call it an early night. I'm on duty tomorrow.”

Kiba wondered what was going on in Shino's head.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Meanwhile, just as Shikamaru had predicted, Shikaku Nara was getting very, very drunk.

“I can't believe my son's getting married,” he proclaimed, sending drops of sake flying.

“I can,” said Inoichi Yamanaka testily, “because one, the wedding's tomorrow, and two, because you've said that, what, _five_ times already this evening?”

“Pisshead,” Chouza Akimichi joined in.

“The least you can do is let an old man enjoy himself,” grumbled Shikaku. He drained his glass in one go. “Neither of your kids are married yet.”

Chouza snorted. “And?”

“So mine's the first, Chouza- _sama_ ,” said Shikaku, knowing how much his team mate disliked being addressed formally. “While yours is still shagging his way round the village. Apples, trees, etc.”

“Fuck off, Pineapple.”

“Hurrah for pineapples,” said Inochi cheerfully, pouring himself some more sake and handing the bottle to Shikaku, who filled his glass yet again. “Anyway, Ino's only eighteen. I'm not expecting her to settle down just yet.”

Shikaku undid his ponytail and sank down into the hot water, exhaling loudly. Chouza saw this as an opportunity to down Shikaku's sake. Shikaku surfaced, and noticed his glass was suspiciously empty. “Did you steal my sake, you fat bastard?” he asked Chouza, who responded by pushing him back under the water.

“Gods,” sighed Inoichi, “I swear it's like being back in the Academy. Get a room, the pair of you.”

“Hurrah for pineapples!” shouted Shikaku, apropos of nothing.

“Bumming with Pineapple!” Inoichi shouted back, and Chouza added, “You can stick your fucking pineapple up your arse.” The three men broke out into peals of laughter. It was an in-joke that they had shared since their graduation, and which never failed to confuse and irritate their respective children.

Eventually, they sobered up. “So which of your kids is going first at the ceremony?” Shikaku asked his team mates.

“As far as I know,” Inoichi answered, “Ino's third, Chouji's fourth. And then Temari's brothers are going to be called up and someone else is going last, but we don't know who yet.” He looked hopefully at Shikaku, who merely shook his head.

“You know,” Chouza said gravely, “I always wondered if any of us were going to survive long enough to see our children grow up and get married. It's a miracle all three of us came out of the war alive. And Chouji...” He couldn't say it. Shikaku concurred. “It's a good thing Kankuro and Gaara are here, otherwise Temari's family would be unrepresented. Girl can barely remember her mother. And her father...well, from what she tells us, he wasn't much of a parent.” He smiled. “Yosh and I have been better parents to her than her so-called father ever was, she said.”

“Yosh and her must get on like a house on fire,” said Inoichi, and Shikaku laughed wryly. “Gods, yes. You should hear the two of them when they're together. Poor old Shikamaru doesn't know what he's in for.”

Chouza thought to himself that never in a million years would he have let his Megumi treat him like Yoshino Nara treated Shikaku. He liked her well enough, but wished Shikaku had the nerve to stand up to her sometimes, although he knew only too well that “anything for a quiet life” was one of the signature phrases of the Nara men.

Inoichi, meanwhile, thought of how proud he was of his daughter, how far she had come in the past three years. He had been spending the past few months training her in the Yamanakas' telepathic techniques, and was impressed at how quickly she was learning; she had taken to the interrogation business like a duck to water. After she had killed that girl from Akatsuki, she had been formally enlisted into the Interrogation Squad, and was one of its only female members. Ibiki had said that Ino's beauty would come in handy; all she had to do was cross her legs in that way she had and let her hair down and some of the weaker prisoners were putty in her hands, not to mention that it lulled them into a false sense of security. Inoichi had worried about her when she was a genin, that she spent too much time concentrating on boys and shopping and not enough on her training, but thankfully she was past all that now, in no small part due to her old sensei's death.

“Right,” said Shikaku briskly, “I propose a toast.” Chouza rolled his eyes, but he and Inoichi still poured more sake into their glasses. Shikaku raised his glass and proclaimed, “To Shikamaru and Temari. May everything go well for them tomorrow.”

Chouza and Inoichi echoed, “To Shikamaru and Temari.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Elsewhere, Shikamaru and Temari were having unmarried sex for what would be the final time, while Naruto, Lee, Chouji, Kiba, Kankuro and Neji were sitting on the roof of the Hokage's building, drinking sake and reminiscing under the stars, while Gaara slept in a room that Sakura had prepared for him.

“This brings back memories.”

The other men looked at Neji. “How so?” asked Kankuro.

“The last time when me, Naruto, Lee, Chouji and Kiba were all fighting alongside each other,” said Neji, half to himself. “When we were all on the same team. We were all brothers in arms, however little we had in common. We all went out there, we worked together, we risked our lives. And we're still here. I can't help but wonder what would have happened if Nar...I mean if S...if he'd come back. If we'd have even gone to war.”

Naruto's eyes were downcast. A silence descended over the group. They all knew who Neji meant, and what the Hokage was thinking.

Lee broke the silence. “But we can say that, as well as being a testimony to the spirit of Konoha and the Will of Fire, good things came of that mission nevertheless. We are here to celebrate the forthcoming marriage of Shikamaru and Temari, the rescuer and the rescuee. Perhaps that is one reason why they love each other so much.”

“And it's definitely one of the reasons why I love him so much,” added Kiba, and he leaned his head on Kankuro's shoulder. “Kankuro, Gaara, Temari, we have so much to thank them for.”

“Long may the alliance between Sunagakure and Konoha continue!” proclaimed Lee. “And no, before any of you ask, I'm not in love with Gaara.”

Kankuro was amazed at how accepting the other boys were. Not one of them so much as glanced oddly at him or Kiba, not a single homophobic remark was made. He thought of what Chouji had said earlier, about seeing people, not men or women, and wondered if that was how the little group felt. That it was the very person that mattered, and not the small details.

The rest of the night was a blur to Kankuro. He passed through it in a haze of booze, sex, conversation, reminiscing, Naruto telling rude jokes that made even Neji laugh, the wind on their faces, Chouji telling an amusing story about how he had been having sex on the Akimichis' kitchen table when Chouza had entered, banged his staff on the floor and bellowed, “ _Will the sex on the kitchen table please end forthwith!_ ” and Chouji and the girl had fallen off in surprise and he'd twisted his ankle. Lee and Neji recounting the time when they had gone to a karaoke bar and Gai had insisted on singing this incredibly tacky song with the line “I like all the girls and all the girls like me.” Lee beginning to well up, Chouji giving him a hug and telling him that they should all go out for karaoke some time. Naruto doing _Oiroke no Jutsu_ and performing a sexy dance. Laughter. Akamaru barking, and then Kiba and him half-dragging, half-carrying each other back to Kiba's house, somehow making it up the stairs, wriggling out of their clothes, and Kiba saying, “ _Juujin Bunshin_!” and Akamaru turning into Kiba, and then Kankuro lying spreadeagled on Kiba's bed as one Kiba fucked him in the arse and the other Kiba offered his cock to Kankuro and begged him to suck him dry, and it seemed to Kankuro as though there were a crowd of Kibas queueing up to take their turn on him.

His sister was getting married tomorrow. He knew he would be hungover. But right now, all he wanted was for Kiba to make him come, and when he did, Kankuro felt as though his entire body had melted into the sheets.

“I can't believe you're going to have Shikamaru fucking Nara for a brother-in-law,” was the last thing he heard Kiba say before he passed out.

 

 


	9. Pit Bull

   “C'mon. Please, I swear, I am hard as fuck right now, and if you don't come in here soon I'm going to finish myself off, and I really don't want to do that.”

“Alright, alright, I'm coming.”

Footsteps from the bathroom, on the hard and dusty floor.

“You're so bossy. You're worse than bloody Shino and his 'I am the team leader and you will obey me' bollocks.”

“You love it.”

Pause. He's right, sadly.

“So, since it's your birthday, what do you want? Just tell me, I'll give it to you. Do you want me to do _Juujin Bunshin_ again?”

“Mmm. Nah. Once was enough. Besides, the whole bestiality angle put me off a bit.”

“But you said you didn't think of it as bestiality! You said it was like meeting my twin brother! You said it was one of the best fucks you've ever had!”

“Yeah, but when he turned back into a dog, it kind of killed my erection.”

“Oh, you're so romantic.”

“Look, when you grow up with a crazy brother who wants to kill you all the time and you're being sent on A-ranks when you're a fucking genin, and then you get stabbed in the gut by an Akatsuki and you nearly die and then you spend most of the war in a hospital and feel guilty because your sister got raped and you couldn't help her, it's hard not to be just a bit fucking cynical, you know?”

“Oh, for fuck's sake, Kankuro, don't start.”

“Sorry.”

“You have such a fucking chip on your shoulder. Yes, I get it. I was lucky to grow up with a mum who loved me and a sister who didn't want me dead and not having to worry about where my next meal was coming from. I know that. You don't have to remind me _all the time_. Do you want me to apologise for your bad childhood?”

“OK, OK. I'm sorry. C'mon. Please. Here, I'll make it up to you...”

Scritch, scritch. Kankuro scratches Kiba's back, in that special area that Kiba can never quite reach, and tickles him behind the ear.

“Ahh, you're forgiven. Ahhh. I love it when you do that. Mmmm. Yeah. That's nice.”

Kiba looks expectantly up at Kankuro. Kankuro places his hands on Kiba's head and draws him closer.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Two months after his twenty-third birthday, Kankuro sat in the staff room, a pile of exam scrolls on his lap.

Five years they'd been together now. Five years, and still Kiba was in Konoha and Kankuro was in Sunagakure. A year ago, at the age of twenty, Kiba had finally made jounin rank, two years after the six chuunin who had been promoted after the war. Kankuro was immensely proud of him; he'd always known Kiba would catch up with Chouji and Lee and all the rest of the old crowd. Moreover, Kiba had been made Konoha's liaison to Sunagakure – kind of like Kankuro in reverse, now that Shikamaru and Temari had a one-year-old daughter to keep them occupied – and he had scheduled his last trip around the time of Kankuro's birthday. It had actually been the Hokage's idea, funnily enough, just as, upon learning Temari's due date, he'd suggested to Shikamaru that Kankuro make his trip to the village around that time. “I know he hates kids,” Naruto had said, balancing Jiraiya, his own small son, on his lap, “but Temari'll want her family around her, won't she? And Gaara's got a village to run.”

“Thanks a lot, Naruto-sa– sorry!” Shikamaru had corrected himself as Naruto rolled his eyes. “Force of habit.”

Sure enough, Kankuro had been in the Hokage's office, talking to Naruto, Neji and the Elders, when Shikaku Nara had entered to announce that his daughter-in-law had given birth to a baby girl, and would Kankuro please come to the hospital as Temari was asking for him? Pointing at Chouza Akimichi with his cane, he had added, “Another first for the Nara clan.”

“Don't I know it,” Chouza had retorted. “First to get married. First one whose kid gets made chuunin. First one whose kid gets married. And now, the first grandfather.” He shook Shikaku's hand. “Congratulations, Pineapple. I'll tell Chouji when he reports in.”

“Permission to leave, Naruto-sama?” asked Kankuro, aware of the Elders' watchful eyes on him.

Naruto had waved him away. “You don't need my permission, Kankuro. And for the last time, will you stop calling me 'sama'! You don't need to be so formal. What are you waiting for? I told you you could leave! C'mon, move it.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

His scrolls strapped to his back, Kankuro had recited the Puppeteers' Creed in front of Nohiko Zahara.

“I am Kankuro,” he began, “and these are Karasu, Kuroari, Sanshuo and Sasori, my puppets. They are mine, and there are no puppets in their likeness. My puppets are my best friends; they are my life. I must master them as I master my life. My puppets are as nothing without my hands to guide them, and I am as nothing without my puppets. Controlling my puppets is second nature to me; it is like breathing. They will shoot straighter than any enemy who is trying to kill me. I must kill or I will be killed. I will.”

Swallowing, he continued: “We, my puppets and I, know that what counts in war is not our traps, the noise of our puppets' dances, the patterns painted on our faces. We know that it is the hits that count. We will.

“My puppets are human, as am I, because they are my life. Thus, I will learn them as brothers, and fight alongside them as a brother. I will learn their weaknesses, their strengths, their parts, their accessories, their traps and their specialities. I will keep my puppets clean, well-oiled and ready, even as I am ready. We will become a part of each other. We will.

“In the presence of Lord Hachiman and Lady Benten, I swear this creed. My puppets and I are the defenders of Sunagakure. We are the masters of our enemy. We are the saviours of my life. So be it, until victory is ours and there is no enemy but peace.” He bowed.

Zahara stood up. She was a slight woman in her forties, with long blonde hair hidden underneath her puppeteer's hood, and two red horizontal lines painted on her face, the first across her eyes, the second across her mouth and cheeks, with a vertical line down the centre of her chin. She'd been one of the legendary Chiyo Akasunano's students, and was fast making a name for herself as a maker of battle puppets.

“Welcome to the Puppet Squad, Kankuro,” she said with a smile, extending her hand, and Kankuro took it. “We'll be glad to have you. Hopefully there'll be more of us by the end of the year.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kankuro's thoughts returned to his tiny niece. Both he and Kiba were uncles now; Kiba's sister, Hana, had two sons with her husband Shikoku, Kishu and Shouza (Tsume had nearly had a heart attack when Hana and Shikoku had announced their second son's name, thinking he'd been named after Chouji's father).

It had been Kankuro who'd chosen the little girl's name. He and Kiba, last time Kiba had come to visit him, had gone to see a Takarazuka troupe perform; they were entirely female, but some of the women were dressed as men, and very convincing men they were too, Kankuro thought. He couldn't entirely remember the content of the play; something about a samurai and his lover. But when Temari had asked Kankuro, “Why don't you pick her name?”, the first thing that had popped into his head was 'Takarazuka'.

“Ta-ka-ra-zu-ka,” repeated Temari.

“That's a bit of a mouthful,” said Shikamaru. “But then we can always shorten it, I guess.”

“Should I have called her _shika_ -something?” Kankuro had asked, worried he'd offended his sister and brother-in-law.

“Nah,” Shikamaru had replied easily. “The only time we'd give a kid a name with _shika_ in is if Ino, Temari and whoever Chouji's girlfriend is all got pregnant at the same time and we have our own little InoShikaChou trio. Takarazuka's fine.”

“Chouji'll have to _get_ a girlfriend first,” Temari had laughed. “He's such a manwhore. For all we know, there are probably lots of women with their own little Choujis all over Konoha, wondering why he hasn't called yet. Go on, Kanky, hold your niece. She won't bite.”

Kankuro raised his eyebrows as Shikamaru lifted the baby from Temari's arms and handed her over to Kankuro. He didn't originally have Chouji down as the manwhore type, but then he _had_ had a threesome with him and Kiba a while back, and Kiba had made some crack about Chouji working his way through the Rookie Nine, and Chouji had laughed and said, “Just you and Ino!”, referring to the time when Ino, wanting to lose her virginity, had boldly gone over to the Akimichi compound and asked Chouji to sleep with her, since she'd heard that he was experienced, and although he'd been surprised (“I thought guys like me weren't your type?”) at first, Chouji had consented and the two of them had had sex on the mountain behind the Akimichi compound. Kiba had guffawed and said if he'd tried anything like that with Hinata, Hiashi would have _Jyuuken-_ ed him across Konoha.

Cautiously, gingerly, Kankuro held Takarazuka in his arms and looked down at her. She was a dark-haired little thing like her father, and so quiet. Although Kankuro didn't like children, he had to admit that he couldn't help but feel a rush of love for his baby niece. It felt so strange, and yet so reassuring, that Temari had managed to try on a normal life and find that it fitted her; that his big sister was now a mother, and he and Gaara were uncles. He wished Gaara was here. Gaara was far better with children.

Ino and Chouji had turned up later to see the baby, and while the exhausted Temari rested with Takarazuka in a cot next to her hospital bed, the two of them had gone out for barbecue with Kankuro, Kiba and Shikamaru to celebrate – their own parents were having a celebration of their own – and Kankuro felt as if they'd known each other since childhood. Ino and Chouji were full of questions about Gaara and the new Puppet Squad and everything that was happening back in Sunagakure, while Kankuro asked Ino about her latest mission and Chouji about his teaching. Then he and Kiba had gone back to the Inuzuka place and fallen asleep in each other's arms. Hana and Shikoku had moved out and were living in another part of the Inuzuka compound.

Kankuro was rudely awakened from his reminiscing when he noticed that on one of the scrolls he was marking, the student had written in crude _kana_ :

_KANKURO-SENSEI IS A DIRTY FAGGOT AND LIKES MEN_

Kankuro dropped the scroll, as though it were on fire and had scalded his hand. He blinked, rubbed his eyes, blinked again and looked at the scroll again, just to make sure he wasn't seeing things. Sure enough, the legend was still there.

_KANKURO-SENSEI IS A DIRTY FAGGOT AND LIKES MEN_

_Do they know?_ Kankuro thought. He'd tried to be subtle whenever Kiba was over, not hugging or kissing him – hell, not even holding his hand - in public or frequenting the few gay haunts in Suna. When other jounin had asked Kankuro about his personal life and whether he had someone, Kankuro had just laughed and shaken his head. Of the people in Suna, he'd only told Baki, Zahara and Gaara, and none of them were likely to betray him. Baki might have told his wife and kids, sure, but all of them liked Kankuro; Sagi was one of Kankuro's team, in fact. The three kids were going to be entering the Chuunin Exams soon and once they had all been promoted, Kankuro would no longer be their squad leader. They were a nice group of kids who made an excellent team,

 _It's probably some kid who's bitter because I gave them a bad mark. Nothing to worry about,_ Kankuro told himself firmly as he discarded the scroll.Yet all that evening, the thought of it haunted him.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kankuro entered the classroom as per usual – he taught when he wasn't called out on missions with either his own squad or the Puppet Squad - and was surprised to see only a few students sitting there.

“Why weren't you in class today?”

The kids took a sudden interest in their shoes. Kankuro glared at them. “Well?”

One of them mumbled something under his breath.

“What was that? I can't hear you.”

“Mum and Dad don't want you teaching us,” said the kid, speaking more clearly this time. “They say you're not fit to be around kids.”

To Kankuro, it was as though someone had taken a hammer and smashed his body into tiny pieces, that he was collapsing into a pile of dust. His vision began to blur. He steadied himself and forced himself to say, “Why?”

“They think you're a pervert,” said one of the other kids. “My dad saw you with a man and he said it looked like you two were a couple. He said he'd always had you down as a poof anyway.”

“A man?” Kankuro repeated dumbly, letting the slur pass him by.

“He had red triangles on his cheeks and a big white dog,” piped up a third child, and Kankuro felt sick. _What kind of a shinobi am I?_ he thought. _I can't even conceal the fact that I am in a relationship with a man? Damn it, I tried so hard. What did I do wrong? And why? How does being with Kiba make me unfit to teach? How? How?_ How?

“Is it true, Kankuro-sensei?” another student asked. “Are you gay? Do you have a boyfriend?”

“I have to go and see the Kazekage,” Kankuro said briskly, and walked away, his hands in his pockets, the children staring dumbfounded after him.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

“ _Suspended?_ ”

“That's what it says,” said Baki grimly.

Kankuro collapsed into the nearest chair and buried his head in his hands. It had all gone so horribly, horribly wrong. Those carefree days he'd spent with Kiba, where they'd sparred and talked and laughed and argued and made love and travelled around Sunagakure, may as well have never happened. He knew that he should always expect the unexpected, that his life always seemed to swing wildly between the two poles of fortune and misfortune, but that knowledge couldn't take away the incredible frustration and rage he had felt when the scroll had arrived, announcing that Kankuro Sabakuno had been suspended indefinitely from teaching due to complaints from parents about his alleged homosexuality, and the fact that they didn't want a gay man teaching their kids. Kankuro could not understand the logic. _Why does it_ matter _?_ he screamed internally. _It's not as if I have a virus. They can't catch it from me. Do they think I'm a paedophile?_ Why? _That makes no_ sense! _I don't like kids as it is, let alone_ fancy _them!_

He was surrounded by a small group consisting of Gaara, Baki and Sagi, Matsuri, Zahara. Sagi was furious, Zahara and Baki incredulous, Gaara taciturn.

“How can they?” Sagi asked furiously. “It's not like he's having sex with the kids.”

“Excuse me,” Kankuro said coldly. “I am here, y'know.” The boy went red and said, “Sorry, sir. But it's true, isn't it? Why does it matter?”

“I wish I knew,” sighed Kankuro. “Gaara, aren't you going to do anything about this?”

“I can appeal it,” Gaara said. “I've half a mind to overturn it, but...” He fell silent.

“Why the fuck can't you just overturn it and make them give me back my job?” demanded Kankuro. “You're the Kazekage! You can do anything you want!”

“It's not that simple,” replied Gaara wearily. Kankuro stared at him in disbelief.

“You'll need other people to testify on your behalf,” Zahara explained. “Hopefully, there will be enough people to speak in favour of you and pressurise the Academy into giving you back your job.”

“The students won't,” Kankuro said with a bitter laugh. “They all hate me.” Sagi flared up. “That's not true! Loads of them are upset that you've gone. There's a picket line at the Academy. And a group of us, we're planning a...”

“Should you really be telling Sir Gaara this?” Baki interrupted his son.

“It will go no further,” said Gaara calmly. “But Sagi, you must be careful. After all, if any protests were to get out of hand and there happened to be any casualties, it is entirely possible that people will speculate that Kankuro was somehow behind it, and they will want retribution. His life could be in danger.”

“I can handle myself,” Kankuro snapped. Baki and Gaara gave him a meaningful look, and he realised what they were thinking, and slumped miserably backwards in his chair.

“I need to think this whole situation over before I can come to a decision,” Gaara said firmly. “But I can assure you, Kankuro, whatever decision comes of this, I will stick to it. In all honesty, the whole thing is a complete and utter waste of my time...”

“So that's what you think of me, is it?” said Kankuro, stung. “I'm just a waste of time?”

“He didn't say _you_ were,” Matsuri reassured him, and Gaara concurred. “Merely that the Academy should fire a member of staff over something so utterly trivial. They're responsible for shaping boys and girls into capable shinobi, and frankly, given what happened a few years ago, the sexuality of a teacher should be the least of our concerns. I cannot understand for the life of me why people get so worked up over such insignificant things. Me being regarded as a monster was one thing. I was a monster, in a sense. I can understand why people were, and still are, uncomfortable around me. But you, Kankuro...the fact that you are in a relationship with a man does not and should not have an effect on your personality or your teaching, and certainly is no cause for people to fear you.” He gave a wry laugh. “Gods, I'm terrible about talking about these things.” It was all Kankuro could do not to throw himself upon his brother and hug him.

“Some people will always have their little prejudices, I guess,” said Zahara with a sigh. “The Puppet Squad welcomes anyone regardless of sexuality. I personally couldn't care less if you're into men, women or cacti as long as you're great at ninjutsu and can handle a puppet or two. And I know Chiyo-sensei would have said exactly the same, militant though she was, although I'm not sure if she'd be OK with your boyfriend being from Konoha. But then things _have_ changed between Konoha and Suna.” The others nodded. Temari's marriage to Shikamaru and the birth of little Takarazuka Nara had certainly done its bit in strengthening the alliance between the two villages.

Kankuro slowly picked himself up. “I need to go outside for a bit,” he said. “Need to clear me head.” Slinging his scrolls on his back, he left the room, his head bowed, and padded out into the cold desert night.

Training with his puppets was, for Kankuro, somewhat therapeutic when he was frustrated or angry. In his teens, he would have perhaps thrown things around the room or punched walls, but now, he was going to channel his anger into something more constructive.

He unrolled his scrolls and placed his hands together.

“ _Karakuri Engeki_.”

Karasu, Kuroari, Sanshuo, Sasori. Kankuro's little team of puppets sprang from the scrolls which housed them. Kankuro attached chakra strings to their wooden limbs and began to manipulate them. He tested the new traps he'd placed in Sasori's body and the hidden blades in Karasu's limbs; he spun out the strings attacked to Karasu to see how far he could make it go, pulled out its limbs and slammed them into Kuroari, pulled them out, slammed them in again, one by one. He made Sanshuo open itself up and release poison gas from one orifice – good old Harumichis, they'd been great at supplying him with new poisons – and flammable gas from another. He attached explosive tags to his strings and fired a flare at them out of Sasori's mouth, blowing them up, and instinctively threw himself behind Sanshuo, activating the great puppet's iron wall. He slammed Karasu, Kuroari and Sasori into the ground to test their durability, and listened with bated breath for the inevitable cracking sound that would warn him to reinforce their bodies and make them harder next time. None came. He made them dance. He made them come alive.

Thank the Gods for puppets, he thought. _You know where they are with them. At least they're loyal. At least they won't let you down or stab you in the back or give you shit for being in love with a man!_

He knew he sounded like a sad bastard, but he didn't care. The Takano clan felt the same way about the swords they'd been trained with as soon as they learned to walk, and the hawks who acted as their eyes and accomplices. Kiba's clan were the same with their dogs, Kiba's team mate's clan with the insects in their bodies. Puppets were not sentient beings, they were creatures of wood and metal, not flesh and blood, and yet, Kankuro felt drawn to them. He remembered the pang of rage and sorrow he'd felt when Sasori – before he'd joined Kankuro's arsenal – had smashed them to bits. He had lovingly rebuilt them with his own hands, and he would ensure that no shinobi would ever smash them again.

Sand blew in his eyes and stung them. He thought of Kiba and wondered what he was doing. Was he training? Walking the dog? On a mission? Being chewed out by his mum? Babysitting his little nephews? Down the pub with Chouji or Hinata or Lee or any of the other Konoha lot?

From the roof of the Sand Siblings' home, Gaara watched the distant figure of his brother in silence.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

In the morning, Gaara knocked on Kankuro's door. Kankuro heaved himself up out of his bed and let Gaara in.

“I've decided,” said the Kazekage. “I'm going to overturn the decision. But I'm going to call a meeting with the people in charge of the Academy and get Baki, Zahara and others to testify on your behalf, for fairness' sake.”

Kankuro smiled lopsidedly. “Thanks. So when do you want me to come?”

“You are not permitted to attend,” said Gaara, and Kankuro immediately stopped smiling. “And why's that?”

Gaara sighed. “You _know_ why. Because I can't trust you not to lose your temper. I know what you're like, Kankuro, and I can't risk you opening your mouth and prejudicing people against you even further. Please do not argue with me” - as Kankuro did, just as Gaara had guessed, open his mouth to protest - “the decision is final. You know as well as I do that as Kazekage, I am ultimately the one who makes the decisions around here, and I can say without any doubt that the decision to suspend you will be overturned regardless. However, it would be a lot more beneficial to your case if you were not there.”

Kankuro massaged his temples, running his fingers through his hair. “Why can't you have more faith in me?”

“I'm only trying to help you, Kankuro,” Gaara said, a note of pleading creeping into his voice. “Please trust me.”

Kankuro nodded reluctantly, but inside he was seething. _Why doesn't Gaara trust me?_ He thought. _Does he really think I'm not capable of keeping my temper? Damn it, I'm not a teenager any more._ However, he had no choice to admit to himself that Gaara was right. He remembered Shikamaru's stag night, when he'd been sitting with Chouji Akimichi, another shinobi who was as hotheaded as him – emphasis on 'was', as Kankuro had recalled how sensitive Chouji had been about his weight, and how he'd lost his temper whenever anyone, team mates included, had commented on or mocked it.

It was as clear as day to Kankuro; he could almost see himself sitting in the bar, surrounded by the former rookies of Konoha, watching Chouji peel bubble gum off his nose and listening to Naruto's raucous voice in the background. “I've grown out of all that now,” he could hear Chouji say, and “I've got to control my temper. If I lose it over something stupid like that, what kind of a shinobi am I?” _No wonder my brother-in-law likes that guy so much_ , Kankuro thought. _They're two of a kind when it comes to level-headedness.If only I were more like those two._

He was stung by the realisation that Shikamaru and Chouji were both younger than him, that they had attained the rank of Jounin only recently, and yet Chouji had managed to gain better control of his temper than Kankuro had, and moreover, that flying into a rage at the slightest provocation had, of course, never been an issue for Shikamaru. Kankuro knew that the two of them were generally more placid than he was, but even so, it irritated him that the younger shinobi had seemingly outgrown him. They all had, even Naruto, even that lovable, scruffy dimwit with the dog, whose life Kankuro had once saved as he'd lain exhausted against a tree and waited for the end to come. That dimwit who Kankuro loved and missed, and over whom he'd lost his job.

 _There you go again,_ he chided himself. _You're blaming Kiba. It's not his fault. Grow the fuck up._ He remembered snapping at Kiba about how he was lucky to have a mother, and felt guilty at the memory.

As he washed, brushed his teeth, dressed and strapped his scrolls on his back for another day's training, Kankuro could not help but think about the conference. Gaara would be sitting there in his Kazekage's robes, one of the youngest people there and yet old and wise beyond his years. His little brother, the former psychopath and most hated and feared person in the village, the one person – Kankuro realised with a shock - whose respect he desired more than most.

_I know what I have to do now. Sorry, Gaara._

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Gaara sat at the head of the table, between the carvings of the former Kazekages inlaid in the adobe wall of the Kazekage's building. He was flanked by Baki and Kagura Harumichi, the head of the Harumichi clan. Seated around the table were Nohiko Zahara; Tenji Takano, head of the Takano clan; a couple of other Akahara clan members, including Baki's wife and children; the jounin in charge of the Sunagakure Ninja Academy; a group of parents; and a group of village elders. Matsuri was circulating the table, pouring tea. Gaara stood up, and immediately the room became silent.

“I'm sure you all know why we're here,” he said. “This meeting is to discuss the suspension of the jounin Kankuro Sabakuno. I am aware that some of you are unhappy about recent revelations regarding his personal life. Perhaps one of the parents would like to speak?”

One of the parents, a heavyset, nervy-looking woman in a jounin's uniform, coughed. “The fact of the matter is, Gaara-sama,” she said hesitantly, “is that we're...not happy about Kankuro teaching our kids. We've heard things about him, and I for one am not comfortable with a man of...the homosexual persuasion...teaching my children. I'm not sure I like the idea of them being in the same room as him.” Other parents nodded. Gaara's face remained expressionless, though inside he was raging.

“It's just wrong, that's what it is,” added a wiry man with a long dark braid. “It's unnatural.”

“Now hang on a minute!” yelped Sagi Akahara, but Baki hissed at him to be quiet, and he fell silent and slumped moodily back in his seat.

“Let us hear what others have to say in Kankuro's defence,” deadpanned Gaara. “I understand there are some who wish to speak in favour of him being reinstated.”

Zahara was first to speak. She told the room at large about Kankuro's recruitment to the Puppet Squad, and how active he had been in getting it restarted. She spoke in glowing terms of how he trained every day, how he had customised the body of the traitor Sasori and turned him into another battle puppet, how his ambition was to be able to control at least ten puppets. “I believe, my lord,” she declared, “that Kankuro has the potential to be as powerful as Chiyo-sensei was in her prime. He's catching up fast.”

Sagi, Kotono and Shigeru stood up and, in turn, told their audience about the time they'd spent training under Kankuro. Shigeru called Kankuro a 'great motivator'. Kotono spoke at length about how Kankuro had helped her clan in testing poisons they'd been working on, and Kagura, her mother, conferred: “The Puppet Squad and the Harumichi have always had a good working relationship.” Sagi went into a tirade about Kankuro's relationship with his family.

After his son had finished, Baki picked up. He told the room at large about how he had been forced to act as a surrogate father to Kankuro, Temari and Gaara; how he had trained Kankuro ever since his graduation, and how hard Kankuro had worked to achieve the position of chuunin and then jounin after a humiliating defeat at the hands of a member of Konoha's Aburame clan; Kankuro's bravery and quick thinking when fighting the traitor Sasori; the way he had led other, younger shinobi into battle during the war with Akatsuki. “As Kankuro's squad leader,” he said, “I can honestly say that these accusations against him are utterly baseless. He may be the brother of the Kazekage, but Gaara-sama would not have entrusted him with such a responsibility, had he suspected Kankuro of potentially harming those in his care.”

“But are you sure?” asked one of the parents. “I mean, he is violent.”

“Kankuro is working on controlling his temper,” Baki replied firmly. “I know there was an incident, but he's come on in leaps and bounds since then.” Another puppeteer, a dark-skinned young man in his mid-twenties by the name of Koshiro Ichikawa, concurred. “I was a couple of years above Kankuro in the Academy,” he said, “and no offence, Gaara-sama, but he was...well...a bit, shall we say, difficult. He's almost an entirely different person now. He's grown up a lot since then. He's had to.”

“That's all very well,” said the female jounin who had spoken before, “but the problem is...”

The door swung open, and Kankuro walked into the room.

Gaara buried his head in his hands. But then he looked at Kankuro, and realised, with a start, that his older brother was surprisingly calm. He was unsmiling, his hands clenched into fists, but he did not look as though he was going to break out into one of his shouting fits. A murmur went around the room.

Kankuro held up a hand for silence.

Silence fell, and the whole room waited. Kankuro closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and surveyed the room before him.

“Right,” Kankuro said. “First off, Gaara, I owe you an apology. I know you said I wasn't supposed to be here, and I appreciate you have your reasons. So I'm sorry for disobeying you.” He paused, and looked around the room. “I need you all to shut up and listen to me for a bit. I will not keep you for very long, but there's a couple of things I need to say. If you have any objections, any nasty little digs, please keep them to yourselves.

“I am a shinobi of Sunagakure. I was born here. I grew up here. I trained here. I will probably die here. I am the son of the Fourth Kazekage and the brother of the current Kazekage. I was a member of the previous Puppet Squad. I served, and was injured, in the previous war with Akatsuki. I, along with many of my fellow shinobi, risked my life to protect both this village and Konoha from the threat of Akatsuki. I suffered at their hands. I knew only too well what they were capable of. I was crippled and feared I would never walk again, but thanks to Konoha's excellent medics, I survived.

“Sunagakure is my home, and I would risk, and have risked life and limb to defend it. Konoha talk of the Will of Fire and the importance of passing on skills and knowledge to future generations, so that they may continue to defend the village. And so, that is what I decided I would do – I would help train our future shinobi. I would contribute to making Sunagakure strong and proud again, to making this village a worthy ally of Konoha. Naruto-sama and his colleagues have given me advice and support in achieving this goal. As I'm sure most of you are aware by now, one of said shinobi is the man I fell in love with. The man who I was spotted with, and apparently this is cause enough to take my job away from me.

“I know I have a temper. I know I am strict. But I would never harm any of the children in my care, and neither would I molest them, as apparently some people think I would. I am utterly disgusted, to tell you the truth, that people actually think that. I find such a thing repellent and not once has it crossed my mind. The fact that people equate my being gay with being attracted to kids and wanting to harm them, the fact that I'm being compared to someone like...like... _Orochimaru_...” There was a start at the mention of the name. “...it makes me sick and it says more about them than it does me.

“I have survived a war and taken on the responsibility of training young shinobi, I have rejoined the Puppet Squad, I train every day, and this is all the thanks I get. I am not a traitor. I did not attempt to kill Gaara or anyone else, I did not sell Sunagakure out, I did not use my techniques for evil purposes. No, all I did was fall in love with a man. And because some people are too small-minded to see past this, because apparently being in love with a person of the same gender makes you unfit to work with children – regardless of your credentials as a shinobi and teacher - I have lost my job. My brother-in-law, Shikamaru Nara, an advisor to the Hokage, believes that such a thing is mere trivia compared to some of the evil things that have been done to this village. And he's right. In the grand scheme of things, it is nothing. We are still recovering from war, we need all the teachers and shinobi we can get, and this is how you repay me, and no doubt will repay other shinobi like me. I hope you are all proud of yourselves.

“And to those of you who have come here to support me, thank you. You know who you are. That is all.” His back still erect, Kankuro turned and left the room. Behind him, Baki, Kagura, Zahara, Matsuri and even most of the parents began to applaud, while Gaara felt a sudden warmth in his chest, and wondered what this unfamiliar feeling was.

The next day, Kankuro came downstairs to find Gaara waiting for him, a scroll in hand.

“Congratulations, Kankuro,” he said, and Kankuro could have sworn that he was smiling. “The Academy have decided to reinstate you.”

Kankuro's mouth hung open. For once in his life, he was speechless.

“After hearing your speech, they felt they had no choice but to reinstate you,” said Gaara. “Even though I would have used my power as Kazekage to reinstate you anyway, it's good to know that I didn't have to go that far.”

Kankuro's expression did not change.

“Stop staring at me like an idiot,” said Gaara sternly, “and get back to the Academy.”

When he arrived at the Academy, puppet scrolls strapped to his back, Kankuro found himself suddenly buried under a mob of genin and future genin. The breath was squeezed out of his lungs as child after child threw themselves on him, grabbed his hands and shook them, patted him on the back, squealing, “Kankuro-sensei! You're back! Thank the gods! Hey, Kankuro-sensei, when do we start training again? Kankuro-sensei! We've missed you! Kankuro-sensei! _Kankuro-sensei!_ ”

“Thank you,” Kankuro managed to gasp out. “It's good to be back.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Yet a month later, as the two brothers were eating dinner, Kankuro announced to Gaara that he would be leaving Sunagakure and moving to Konoha until 'things calm down here'.

“But why?” asked Gaara, confused and hurt. “You've got your job back. Is that not enough?”

Kankuro lowered his eyes. “I appreciate everything you and Baki-sensei and everyone else did for me,” he said, “I really do. But I think it would be best for everyone if I got out of here for a bit. I will come back. And besides...it would be nice to see Temari again.” He paused, and added, “And I want to be with Kiba.”

“Fair enough,” sighed Gaara. “I cannot force you to stay. I swear, you are the most obstinate person I have ever met.” He suddenly smiled, and laid a hand on Kankuro's arm. “ As long as you do come back. Don't worry, _nii-san_. Everything will work itself out eventually. Suna's not the hate-filled place it used to be. I wonder if it's because of our alliance with-” He broke off as he heard a sharp intake of breath from the other man, and felt a small tremor running down his arm.

He turned to face Kankuro, and saw, to his shock, that tears were streaming down Kankuro's face. His shoulders were shaking, his face contorted in pain.

In all the twenty-one years that Gaara had known him, he had never seen Kankuro cry before.

“What have I done?” asked Gaara, confused. “I don't understand...”

Kankuro tried to speak, but the words would not form themselves. “That...that...”

“Go on,” said Gaara gently.

Kankuro swallowed, and choked out, “Gaara...that's...that's...th-the first time...you...you've ever acknowledged me as your brother.”

A howl of pain tore its way through Kankuro's body and out of his throat, and he rested his head on his arms and cried, the pain of the last decade that had accumulated since his father's death, Orochimaru's betrayal, Sasori's destruction of Kankuro's puppets and filling his body with poison, Gaara's murder, the war between Sunagakure, Konoha and Akatsuki, Konoha and Sunagakure's death toll, the grieving faces of Naruto, Sakura, Lee, the Hyuugas and Akimichis and civilians, Kankuro's scarred and mutilated body, Temari's rape, his own sense of hopelessness, his longing for Kiba and rage towards the Sunagakure Ninja Academy finally wrenching itself free, like a splinter lodged deep within the skin. And Gaara, lost for words, could do nothing but awkwardly place his arm around Kankuro's shoulders.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Two days before his one-way journey to Konoha, Kankuro went down to the post office to fetch the post for him and Gaara, and found a scroll with his name on it in a familiar scrawl, accompanied by an inky paw print. All but racing back to his house, he wondered what was going on. He hadn't heard from Kiba for some time; well, that wasn't surprising, really. Kiba was a jounin after all. He didn't know about the suspension. Kankuro wondered how he was going to tell him.

When he had returned home, he plonked himself down on his bed, unsealed the scroll and began to read.

 _Dere kankuro_ (Kiba had written, and his spelling was as atrocious as ever),

_Sory i havent been in tuch lately, im crap i no. Ive been traning sum genin from my clan plus ive been doin survalance with shino and sum others. Im not going to be a teem kaptane like chouji or tenten cos i sed to naruto, id ratha do dog traning and handling for the time bein and mum sed stuf to him to cos shes clan hed so he said ok you can do that. So thats wot im doing. Mum and hana say hi. By the way theres a reson wy im riting this, i thot you ort to no wots been going on lately._

_So much stuf has hapend since i last rote. Chouji is getin maried to yumi his gurlfrend and so are ino and sai. Choujis had a lot to deel with lately cos theres the weding cuming up and hes tryin to get leaf and chouza had a bit of a brakedown. Mums been over ther a lot. Also hinata is activ agen. She was a bit ify about it cos of her kids but hiashi is ok with it in fact hes ded hapy. Shes stil a chunin tho._

Kankuro's brow furrowed. Shikamaru's team mates getting married? Chouji had finally settled down? What had happened to his father? And what was going on with Hinata? He remembered that she had given up being a shinobi after the war, and wondered what had happened. He read on, and his question was answered. What he found in the scroll not only unsettled him, but left him speechless with horror, then with amazement.

 _Poor Naruto,_ he thought. _Poor Sakura. Naruto always was too liberal...but I can see why he did what he did. Don't worry, Kiba. I promise I won't tell anyone, not even Gaara._


	10. Doberman Pinscher: The Return of Sasuke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The events of this chapter concern the goings-on in Konoha while Kankuro was suspended from his job, and which Kiba mentioned in his letter in the last chapter. Because of the length of the chapter, it has been divided into parts.

**Part 1: The Return of Sasuke**

 

It had all began with the Aburame and Akimichi clans.

Chouji had returned home from a gruelling mission to find his father comforting his aunt Zakuro, while his mother looked after Ringo and Momo, her children. Zakuro sat, Chouza's arm round her shoulder, with her head buried in her hands, her fingers twisting her long red hair, her back visibly shaking. Sounds of anguish were coming from her.

“Dad?” Chouji asked. “Auntie Zakuro? What's happened?”

Zakuro tried to speak, but all that came out were isolated syllables. Shiitake, one of the other clan members and Sanae's former boyfriend, took Chouji aside and told him what had happened.

Sanae Akimichi was one of the many women who had been raped during the war by Amegakure troops. Although, like Temari, Hinata and many other victims, she had suffered from psychological trauma as a result, she and Shiitake had managed to rebuild their life together, and were trying for a baby. However, when no baby came, Sanae went to a medic for an examination, where it was revealed that the rape had left her infertile.

While Shiitake slept, Sanae had written a note for her mother and siblings to find, saying:

 

_Dear Mum, Ringo and Momo_

_I am writing this to say goodbye. I know I will bring shame on the Akimichi, but I cannot go on any more. Because of what happened during the war I can't have kids. I always wanted to be a mum but I will never have the chance._

_I hate myself for what happened to me. I'm not worthy to be a shinobi. I hope Shiitake finds someone better than me._

_I'm so so sorry for doing this to you. Please forgive me, and please ask Uncle Chouza, Aunt Megumi and Chouji to forgive me too._

_I love you,_

_Sanae xxx_

 

She had then climbed to the top of the mountain behind the Akimichi compound and jumped over the edge. Her broken, twisted body was found in a pool of blood at the bottom of the mountain by a group of shinobi on patrol, who had alerted Chouza. Around this time, Momo had found the note and run off by herself to look for her sister, only to be caught by her brother, who told her to come home immediately. She came home to find Chouza, her mother, and the shinobi who had found Sanae's body all gathered together.

Chouji immediately drew the sobbing Shiitake close to him and held him while he cried. He said nothing. There was nothing to be said.

Two weeks earlier, a similar thing had occurred in the Aburame clan, when one of its kunoichi had been found dead, her flesh and organs almost entirely devoured by the bugs that had lived in her body. Chihiro, Shibi's wife, had found the corpse and been violently sick. On behalf of the woman's family and the Aburame clan, Shibi had taken it upon himself to observe the month-long mourning rituals for the family of a suicide: every day he would be obliged to smear ash on his face, to wear a black kimono, and to visit the former Uchiha shrine to pray. In his usual stoic fashion, he had simply gone about his business without a word. Now it was Chouza's turn; both he and his sister volunteered to carry out the rituals.

Shibi and Chouza, tainted by death, attracted stares wherever they went. Since little Kakashi Hatake had come home to find his father's body hanging from the ceiling, there had not been a peacetime suicide in Konoha. Suicide was a great taboo in the shinobi world; while suicide in a situation of war, such as blowing oneself up with explosive tags, was considered acceptable as it was an act of war – the ends justifying the means – suicide in ordinary circumstances was not. Chouza remained calm and positive for his sister's sake, but inside he was eaten up with guilt and sorrow.

_I am the head of the clan,_ he thought,  _and I could not save my poor little niece. If only I'd known what was wrong. What kind of shinobi am I if I can't protect my own family?_

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Amid this cold, dark atmosphere, Naruto had called a meeting, chaired by Shikamaru. With Sakura and Iruka flanking him, and Shikamaru, Shikaku, Hiashi, Shibi and Chouza gathered round the table, he began to discuss the recent elections for the second Jounin Commander. Due to injuries he had sustained after the war, Shikaku had announced that he could not do the job alone. He was getting more tired, having to walk with a cane and needing more rest, and he required a partner. Moreover, he added, as the Kage of the strongest military power among the five Hidden Villages, Naruto would need all the support he could get. Although Konoha had never had more than one Jounin Commander before, Naruto had declared, “Sod it,” and announced that nominations would be open. Only one person had been nominated, but Naruto had decided to let voting go ahead anyway.

“The results are in,” announced Shikamaru. “Neji, Hiashi-sama and I did the count last night. Admittedly, as you all know, we only had one nomination, but there was always the chance people would want to re-open nominations. However...” he looked at Naruto.

Naruto continued. “There was, as Neji here said, an 'overwhelming majority'. Not just people from the clan, either – loads of villagers. From what I've heard, a big part of it is how you led your team in the war, you used your jutsu to defend others, the refuse work you did, you carried me to the hospital when I was unconscious, you were running around like a mad thing looking after people who'd lost family...you get the picture. I can't say I'm surprised, I mean, you're definitely a good person for the job. Especially as you and Shikaku have worked together so long.” He stood up. “Chouza Akimichi, I hereby appoint you the second Jounin Commander of Konoha. That is, if you accept.”

Everyone applauded. Shikamaru and Shikaku smiled broadly. Even though Chouza was wearing his normal shinobi uniform instead of his black mourning kimono – at Naruto's request – he still had ash smeared on his face and didn't feel like a Jounin Commander at that moment. What he really wanted to do was to go home and comfort eat. But, forcing himself to smile, he stood up, bowed to Naruto and said, “I accept. Thank you, Naruto-sama. It is an honour.”

“Alright then,” said Shikamaru briskly. “Next, the Chuunin Exams...”

A small dark blur shot through the door like a kunai and collapsed at the Hokage's feet. Hiashi gave a start as he recognised his younger daughter.

“Hanabi! What is the meaning of this?” He noticed she had activated her Byakugan. “What's wrong?”

Hanabi babbled, “Itsthetraitorisawhimcomingnarutopleasegetdowntothe...” Chouza held up his hand to stop the kunoichi. “Hanabi! Slow down, will you, girl?”

Naruto, suddenly alert, asked, “What is it, Hanabi?”

“It's the traitor, Sasuke Uchiha!” Hanabi cried. “He's returning to the village! I saw him in the distance when I was on patrol duty, and he's headed for us!”

Shikamaru later said that at that exact moment, it was as though the entire room had been preserved in amber. Even the dust itself seemed to stand still. “It was so silent,” he added, “that you could have heard an ant's footsteps.”

Then there was an outburst of noise.

“ _Byakugan!”_

“Sasuke...Uchiha?”

“I don't believe this. I don't believe this.”

“Taki! Oh my gods, who's with Taki?”

“Ahh! Fuck! Where's my staff?”

“Sound the alarm!”

“Go, my insects, alert the rest of the clan. At once.”

“My lord! Wait!”

But Naruto and Sakura were gone.

“We'd better go after them,” said Shikamaru briskly, as a horde of Shibi's bugs buzzed rapidly out of the window. “Sir Hiashi, Sir Chouza, you two had better go and warn your clans. Get as many of them to come as you can. And if you find Inoichi, Kurenai, Konohamaru, Tsume or Dad, get them to come as well. We need as many jounin out there as possible. Neji, set the alarm off. We've got to warn the villagers.” Hiashi winced slightly at being ordered around by a younger man, but Chouza simply saluted and barked, “ _Yes sir!_ ” and ran, the corridor shaking under his feet. Hiashi followed, while Neji sped off to sound the alarm.

Chouji, his fiancee and Megumi were on their way home when they saw Chouza running towards them. Chouji noticed that his father's long red hair was tied back, and that he was wearing his forehead protector instead of his usual headband, and realised with unease that something was very, very wrong. He knew that his father rarely wore a forehead protector, claiming he 'didn't really need it that much', and it took an extreme situation indeed to get him to put it on.

“Chouji!” Chouza bellowed. “Shift your arse! We've got an emergency at the gate! The Uchiha traitor's back!”

Chouji's expression did not change. He turned to Yumi and said quietly, “Go back to the house and take Mum with you. And lock all the doors.” Yumi nodded grimly, and she and Megumi hurried back to the Akimichi compound as Chouji went to catch up with his father. Elsewhere, members of the Aburame clan were receiving messages from Shibi's insects telling them that the traitor had returned and that they were needed.

Hiashi, meanwhile, headed straight to the Hyuuga compound, gathering up every shinobi he could find and ordering them to the gates. Although she had small children to look after, Hinata entrusted them to the care of one of the younger girls from the branch family, and sped off to join her father. Even though she was no longer a shinobi, she still wanted to do what she could. Kou was probably already down there. She hoped her children would be alright and that the shinobi of Konoha would be able to thwart whatever awaited them.

Kiba was walking Akamaru when the siren began to wail, and Akamaru along with it. Everywhere, civilians were fleeing to their homes or to the shelters, while jounin, chuunin and even a few genin were racing in the direction of the village gates. Rock Lee and Tenten came storming up to him, Lee crying, “Kiba! Come down to the gate! He has come back!”

“What the fuck are you babbling on about, Lee?” growled Kiba. “Who's come back?”

“Sasuke Uchiha, of course,” replied Tenten. “C'mon, Kiba, move it. We need all the shinobi we can get.” Shouldering a huge scroll which Kiba presumed contained weapons, she ran off, Lee almost instantly overtaking her.

Akamaru began to whine, and Kiba ran down to the gates, beckoning his dog to follow him. A huge blonde teenage girl from the Akimichi clan with Chouza's facial markings, who he knew to be Chouji's cousin Momo, nearly knocked him over as she came roaring past, screaming, “ _Alriiiiight!_ Woo! Let's kill the cunt!”, a skinny, grinning Branch Hyuuga girl and an Aburame boy following her.

He wondered what Naruto must be thinking right now

 


	11. Doberman Pinscher: The Death of Sasuke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The events of this chapter concern the goings-on in Konoha while Kankuro was suspended from his job, and which Kiba mentioned in his letter in the last chapter. Because of the length of the chapter, it has been divided into parts.

**Part 2: The Death of Sasuke**

Sasuke Uchiha stood at the gates, one hand on his sword, and gazed back at the sea of faces before him. He recognised so many people; his former classmates were there, as were their parents, several jounin he vaguely remembered, Iruka, that woman who worked for the Fifth Hokage, some of the genin from the year below. And right in the middle of them all, Naruto and Sakura, his two former team mates. Naruto in Hokage's robes, Sakura carrying a small boy with pinkish-gold hair. Chouji Akimichi, now with waist-length hair, on one side of them and his huge father on the other. Hinata Hyuuga behind her father, wringing her hands. Where was her forehead protector? Was that Shino Aburame in the fox mask? Rock Lee, Tenten, Neji. Kiba Inuzuka and his now enormous white dog. The creature had been a tiny puppy when Sasuke had run away. Shikamaru Nara, and that girl from Sunagakure with the fan. She looked different, somehow. His father behind him, leaning on a cane. Ino Yamanaka with her father – what was with the grey uniform, was she in the Interrogation Squad? Ibiki, the examiner. Konohamaru Sarutobi, now taller with the beginnings of a beard, and with him, Kurenai Yuuhi with her arm round a small boy with dark wavy hair and red eyes.

He hated the lot of them.

And they hated him. Fear, rage, hatred. Sasuke could feel it: all those angry, narrowed, glittering eyes staring at him, the clenched fists and weapons about to be brandished, the hands ready to form seals, the protruding veins on the faces of the Hyuuga shinobi. His former classmates were going to become his executioners.

 _As fucking_ if _,_ he thought. _I am the last Uchiha, and I am not letting_ any _of these bastards kill me._

Nobody spoke. Only the wind rustling through the leaves was audible. Kiba recalled the last time he'd seen Sasuke. His forehead protector was gone, and instead of his old outfit of blue polo shirt and white shorts, he'd been wearing the outfit he was wearing now; an unbuttoned white shirt, dark trousers and a purple rope belt of a kind, fastened at the front. He didn't want to think of the implications it had. It had been six years ago, and Sasuke had barely aged or changed. He wondered if Orochimaru had cast some kind of weird de-aging technique on him...

Shikamaru broke the silence.

“What do you want, Sasuke?” he asked, trying to keep the anger in his voice to a minimum. But it was no use, and his voice shook.

“I want,” replied Sasuke, “an audience with Naruto and Sakura.”

Chouza was about to protest when Sakura laid a hand on his shoulder and said, gently but firmly, “Stay out of this. You too, Shikamaru.”

Shikamaru's body sagged visibly. Kiba almost felt sorry for him. What with his little daughter at home, he must have been sick with worry.

Sasuke cast the seal of the Tiger, and shouted, _“Katon! Goryuka no Jutsu!_ ”, sending a great wave of flame into the sky. Kiba noticed that it took the form of a dragon, and wondered where he'd learned such a bizarre and unearthly technique. It must have been Orochimaru's doing, somehow, as he'd never seen Sasuke do anything so spectacular. It was almost beautiful to watch, somehow.

The sky began to darken, grey and black clouds gathering around the spot in the sky where the great fire dragon had disappeared. Akamaru began to howl, and Kiba felt sick. He wondered what he should do, and tentatively began to form a seal, but realised that a _Gatsuuga_ would be no use against Sasuke; if he was capable of shooting a dirty great fire dragon into the sky, what else was he going to do? Either way, it didn't look good for Konoha.

First Pein, and now this, he thought sadly. _Just when we thought we'd got our lives back on track. It never fucking stops. Oh, Kankuro...I wish you were here...I can't bear the thought of dying without you..._

Was Madara Uchiha hiding somewhere? No, he couldn't be. Madara was dead. Orochimaru was dead. All of those Akatsuki scum were dead. But for all they knew, Sasuke could have a whole crowd of troops hidden somewhere, ready to invade.

Naruto stepped forward tentatively.

“Sasuke?” was all he managed to say.

“How observant of you,” said Sasuke dryly. “Yes, it's me. And before you ask, I'm alone. I came here all by myself. So this welcoming committee you laid on is unnecessary.”

Chouji glanced uneasily at his father and muttered, “Dad, please.” He knew Chouza was just itching to race forward and crush Sasuke. The sheer hatred in his father's eyes chilled him to the core. In all of his twenty-two years, he'd never seen Chouza look so disturbing, so terrifying. It was as though this kind, brave, honourable man who'd raised him had been replaced by some frightening, psychotic stranger.

“Sasuke,” said Sakura, clutching Jiraiya close to her, “what is it you want? Naruto? Me? Our son? Why have you come back, Sasuke?”

“Very affectionate for someone who's been screwed over, isn't she?” said Tenten under her breath.

“Shh,” whispered Lee. “I want to hear what he has to say, traitor or not. And he is her old team mate.”

Tenten stared. For someone who was still in mourning for his beloved sensei, killed in a battle with an Akatsuki member, Lee was being surprisingly rational and calm. Maybe he was actually about to burst into tears any second.

“Is he your son?” Sasuke asked, pointing at Jiraiya. Sakura nodded tersely. “Don't worry,” said Sasuke, “I'm not going to hurt him.”

“Then why are you here?” Naruto blurted out.

“To see you, Naruto,” replied Sasuke. He paused. Then he spoke again.

“Naruto...Sakura...for what I am about to do, please forgive me.”

Chouji and Chouza's hands were clasped, ready to form the seals they needed for clan technique.

The sky was black. Sasuke raised his arm. Kiba could have sworn he was smiling. He shivered.

Sakura crouched down, sheltering Jiraiya with her body.

“ _SASUKE!_ ” Naruto screamed. “ _NO!_ ”

A bolt of lightning streaked down from the sky, so fast the villagers' eyes could barely behold it, and directly struck Sasuke in the chest. His body seemed to collapse in on itself as it fell to the ground.

Ino charged through the crowd, not caring who she shoved aside. She felt a strange sensation in the back of her throat and behind her eyes, but forced it back. Shikamaru followed her, and without a word, Chouji stood aside to let his team mates pass. Ino and Shikamaru knelt down besides Sasuke's body, and Ino felt for a pulse. She felt nothing. Sasuke's skin was ice cold.

The Uchiha clan were no more.

Naruto's legs gave way and he collapsed to his knees, unable to take his eyes off the dead body of his former team mate. His lips were moving, but no sound came out. His skin was a deathly pallor, his fingers digging into the soil.

No one cheered, not even Chouza or Shikamaru. The crowd were uneasy. Something had gone horribly, horribly wrong with the Hokage. It was like watching a dog standing on the very edge of some dark abyss, the slightest gust of wind capable of pushing it into the gaping maw of darkness below. Something was going to give.

Then all hell broke loose. Naruto threw back his head and let loose a horrible, unearthly howl of pain and sorrow. The various Inuzuka dogs gathered, Akamaru included, joined in, but their human partners, for once, did not.

“ _SAAAAAAAASUKEEEEEEEEE!_ ”

Naruto's body began to glow red; the whisker marks on his cheeks became blacker, thicker, more prominent, his canine teeth stretched and grew into fangs, and his eyes became wild and feral. Gasps and shouts went up from the crowd. The Inuzuka dogs began to whine.

Someone screamed, “The fox! The fox!”

 _The Kyuubi!_ Sakura thought. _If I don't act now, he's going to lose control, and who knows what will happen?_

Something had to be done. But there was the question of Jiraiya. The little boy was beginning to fret and wanted to know what was wrong with his daddy.

“Jiraiya,” said Sakura, trying to keep her voice as stable as she could, “I've got to go and look after Daddy. He's not feeling very well.”

Jiraiya began to cry. “I want my daddy.”

“Please, Jiraiya,” Sakura begged, “please be a big brave boy for Mummy and Daddy, OK? Daddy's going to be alright, I promise. I'm going to make him better. Iruka will look after you. Please, baby.” She hugged him. “Iruka will look after you.”

Jiraiya brightened. He loved his godfather, who often helped look after him when Mummy and Daddy were busy. Iruka picked the child up and said, “C'mon, Jiraiya. Let's get you home.”

A tail began to appear.

“Chouza-sama!” Sakura screamed. “Help me! We can't let people see Naruto like this! Elders! Shikamaru! Get everyone away from here! Now!”

Chouza did not need telling twice. He cast the seals of the Ram and the Bird and roared, “ _Baika no Jutsu!_ ” In seconds, his immense body formed a barrier between the villagers and the screaming Naruto. Ino crouched down behind him, while Chouji, Inoichi, Shikamaru, Temari, Hinata and Neji began to disperse the crowd, shepherding them back into the village. “Everything's under control!” Chouji shouted at the top of his voice. “Fall back, everyone! Sakura will finish up here!”

Momo Akimichi and Miho Hyuuga began to protest. “But I want to stay,” Miho whined, and Momo added, “It's not fair! Why's Uncle Chouza in the way? I want to see what's going to happen to the Hokage.”

“Be quiet, both of you,” growled Neji. “Get back to the village at once, do you hear me? Or I'll cut off your chakra.”

“And I'll beat the shit out of you, Momo,” added Chouji. “Now fuck off.”

Momo glared at Chouji defiantly, but Miho, realising both jounin were serious, dragged her away. A group of ANBU, Shino and Sai included, quickly carried Sasuke's corpse away.

 _Two tails._ As the assembled crowds began to disperse, Sakura felt in her kit bag for something to subdue Naruto. A smoke bomb? No, too risky. She could end up gassing Chouza by mistake, or indeed, anyone within a few metres' radius. A syringe? _Madness!_ She would surely be burned if she came anywhere near Naruto, and he had nearly killed her that last time.

She heard Chouza suppress a cry of pain. The Kyuubi's chakra was beginning to burn him. He raised his arms to shield his face.

 _Three tails._ If Naruto grew one more, his life would be shortened even further. Only the gods knew how much time her husband had already lost because of that fucking bastard fox. _I have to stop him from growing any more tails._

She felt her hand touch a long thin item made of wood, and plled it out of her bag. A blowpipe. Now all she needed was a tranquilliser and... _yes!_ There was a small bag of tranquilliser darts. Thanking the gods and praying that Naruto would not suffer any unwanted side effects, she loaded the dart into the pipe and aimed it at Naruto's neck. She took an immense breath, channelling chakra into her lungs, and blew into the pipe. The dart hit home, and Naruto keeled over. The vile power of the Kyuubi began to wear off and the chakra shield melted away, leaving behind a broken and burned Jinchuriki.

Chouza returned to his normal size, while Ino and Sakura laid their hands on Naruto and began the arduous process of healing the burns. Shikamaru took charge of the group of Elders and advisors. Hinata was also there.

“Dad, Chouza, Chouji, everyone,” he said tersely, “let's go. Let's leave them to it.”

Hiashi hesitated and asked, “Shouldn't we stay here? Surely Naruto-sama will need more help?”

Shikaku disagreed. “The boy's right,” he said, shaking his head. “Naruto's in good hands. We'll only get in the girls' way if we stay there. Let's go back.”

“And I've got to get Dad to the hospital,” added Chouji.

“Don't baby me, Chouji,” Chouza growled. “I'm fine.”

“Bollocks,” was Chouji's reply, and Chouza glared at him. “Excuse me. Who's head of this clan?”

“Chouji's right,” Shikaku argued. “Stop being so stubborn. You've got burns all over your face.”

“So maybe it's an improvement,” Chouza retorted. “I'm not going to the hospital.”

Inoichi stepped in. “For Izanagi's sake, Chouza,” he said angrily, “you're not impressing anyone. You're injured. Now, are Shikaku and me going to have to restrain you? Because we can, and we will if we have to, whether you're Jounin Commander or not. Or are you going to back down for once?”

“Are you...” Chouza began, but Shikaku cut him off. “Enough. Both of you.”

Ino, Chouji and Shikamaru all relaxed. Shikamaru silently applauded his father, and Chouji's shoulders slumped. He hated seeing his father like this.

The little group began to walk back to the village.

“Poor little Jiraiya,” said Hinata sadly, thinking of how her children had avoided seeing the horror of the Kyuubi. “It must be so awful for him, seeing his father like this.” Shikamaru, a fellow parent, agreed. Temari had raced on ahead in order to get home and attend to Taki. Fortunately, while other Nara shinobi had been at the gates, Yoshino had stayed at home to look after the little girl.

“At least he's not seen the worst of it,” said Chouza. “Iruka got him well out of the way before it got really bad. Gods, what a lucky kid he is to have Sakura for a mother. That girl is a fucking heroine. The way she handled the beast taking over...she's got more balls than most of the male shinobi in this village, indeed.”

And in a quieter voice, which only Chouji could hear, he added, “May your memory be wiped out, and may you rot in Hell for all eternity, Uchiha cunt.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Sasuke regained consciousness, only to find himself lying on what appeared to be some kind of grassy plain.

 _Where am I? Is this Konoha? Where is everyone? Naruto...Sakura...all those bastard villagers...the sky is clear again. My_ Kirin _must have hit, surely..._

“Sasuke?”

He'd heard that voice before, he was sure of it.

“Sasuke?”

 _Damn it!_ Who was that voice? So familiar, it was. Someone he hadn't heard in years.

Someone was bending over him. Another familiar voice. “Hey, kid, wake up.”

He gingerly opened one eye and saw a blurry figure. He couldn't be sure, but it seemed to have silver hair.

_Kakashi._

“Sensei?”

“It looks like he's awake,” said Kakashi to the tall figure behind him, and as Sasuke opened his other eye and his vision cleared, he saw his older brother smiling down at him.

“Itachi! My gods! It's you!”

“I'm not going to harm you, little brother,” said Itachi. “It's OK. You're safe now. It's all over. Now we can move on.”

“So much for reviving the clan,” Sasuke said. He rubbed his eyes and sat up. “What's going on? Am I...” Itachi nodded, and Kakashi added, “You died by your own hand, Sasuke. I saw it all.”

Itachi extended his hand and helped Sasuke up. “C'mon, kid. Mum and Dad want to see you.”

Sasuke shuddered. “I'm glad it's over now. Itachi...do you forgive me for what I did?”

“Please,” said Itachi, holding up his hand. “It's all in the past now.”

“And if I know Sakura and Naruto,” said Kakashi, “they'll acknowledge what you did. And I don't just mean bringing them closer. At least you atoned for your treachery, Sasuke. Now let's go.” And the three men walked through the grass, to where Mikoto and Fugaku Uchiha stood waiting.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Normally, when Naruto woke up, he would open his eyes wide, close them, open them again, and spring out of bed. He had never been the type to enjoy a lie-in, even when he'd been on a particularly difficult mission. However, when he woke up this time, the effects of Sakura's dart were still wearing off.

His eyelids felt leaden. He propped himself up on one elbow and rubbed his eyes. He felt woozy and sick and his body was aching all over. He could make out red patches on his skin, and gradually, as his eyes began to open of their own accord, he realised he was in his and Sakura's bedroom.

How did I get here? Where's Sakura? Jiraiya? What happened to me?

He could vaguely recall being at the village gates surrounded by ninja. Sakura with him, holding Jiriaya, and an Akimichi on each side. Everyone angry and tense. Because someone...

_...someone had come back..._

_...and it was...and he'd..._

When Sakura came back from the hospital, where she'd been attending Chouza and healing his burns, she found Naruto lying on the bed, staring dully at the ceiling.

“Are you OK?” she ventured, after a pause that seemed hours long, but was only a matter of seconds in reality.

Naruto did not speak. He continued to stare at the ceiling.

“I had to give you the tranquilliser,” Sakura said. She cringed inwardly at how stupid she sounded. “I was scared, Naruto, I was scared you'd hurt someone...or you'd go four tails again. You were at three, and Ino was there, and Chouza, and...I...I didn't want you to lose any more off your life. I was frightened for you. I didn't mean to hurt you.”

Naruto said nothing.

“Don't you remember?” Sakura said, more sharply this time. “Ino and me brought you back. You went out of control because Sasuke...” She couldn't say it.

Naruto was still silent. His eyes were blank and his hands were folded in his lap.

Sakura panicked, grabbed hold of Naruto's shoulders and shook him. “Naruto! Say something, will you? You're fucking scaring me! Snap out of it! What do you...”

Naruto raised his arm and shoved Sakura away, sending her flying across the room, and yelled, “ _Shut up! Shut up shut up shut up!_ ”

Stunned, Sakura picked herself up and crouched down, ready to defend herself. It was a long time since she had seen Naruto like this.

“What do you want me to say?” asked Naruto in a monotone. “What do you want me to say, Sakura? I just...I need time to think, and you yelling at me isn't going to help.” He realised with a pang that that was exactly what Sakura had said to him when he'd been yelling at her and Tsunade to let him hurry Shizune with an autopsy she had been doing on one of Pein's bodies.

“Naruto...” Sakura began.

Naruto cut her off. “I want to be alone.”

Sakura stood up, her arms folded in defiance, and shook her head.

“Damn it, Sakura!”

 _I was going to wait, but fuck it,_ Sakura thought. Wordlessly, she reached into the pocket of her flak jacket and pulled out a familiar item, passing it to Naruto.

It was a long blue strip of cloth with a metal plate in the centre, bearing the symbol of Konoha. Sasuke's old forehead protector.

Naruto held the forehead protector in his lap, turning it over and over. Then he asked, “Where did you get this?”

“Sai,” said Sakura. She sat down on the bed next to Naruto. “He found it in Sasuke's pocket when ANBU were retrieving the body. He gave it to me when he came to report to us, and told me to give it to you.”

Naruto was silent for a few minutes as he continued to handle the forehead protector. Then his eyes filled with tears and he blurted out, “I couldn't ...even...fucking save him. What kind of a Hokage am I?”

“Please don't say that, Naruto-kun,” said Sakura gently. “I'm as much to blame as you are.” Her voice broke. “If only I'd stopped him leaving the village...”

“Sasuke!” Naruto wailed. And both he and Sakura burst into tears, and clung tightly to each other, holding on for dear life. Neither could bear to tear themselves away from the other, for fear they would fall into some bottomless abyss of pain.

And then, before they knew it, Sakura's tongue entered Naruto's mouth, and their lips locked and they fell off the bed and onto the floor. Kissing each other fiercely, pawing and scratching at each other, tearing each other's clothes off, Naruto's nails digging into Sakura's shoulders, her breasts bared and her fingers laced behind his neck, and he yanked down her knickers and she arched her back and pulled him closer still, drawing him into her. Naruto bit Sakura's nipple. Sakura clawed Naruto's back and drew blood. Naruto kissed her so hard she tasted blood. Sakura channelled chakra into her thighs and her labia and squeezed hard. Naruto cried out in ecstasy, Sakura's hot breath on his face. Tangled up in each other's bodies, the Sixth Hokage and his wife were writhing around on the floor like snakes, crashing into furniture, Sakura's head banging against the floorboards, Naruto's back dripping blood.

Then Naruto came, and his body went limp on top of Sakura's, and he lay on top of her in the dark. And Sakura began to cry again, and Naruto held her, kissed her neck, stroked her hair. Bruised, battered and bleeding, they clung to each other once more.

It was the roughest sex they'd ever had.

And all the while, Jiraiya was sleeping peacefully next door.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

In bed that night, Naruto tossed and turned, caught in a nightmare. He was having another flashback.

_He was running through the village with the toads. He had been reverse summoned._

“ _But I thought Granny Tsunade didn't want me here?” he asked. “On account of it being too dangerous?”_

“ _She changed 'er mind,” said Fukusaku. “The messenger frog said you was needed back in Konoha.”_

_A building collapsed nearby, and screams rang out..._

... _Pein had extinguished the shadow clones, and Naruto's chakra was beginning to run out. At this rate, he wouldn't be able to maintain Sage Mode for much longer._

“ _Chidori_! _”_

_Kakashi was standing in front of Naruto, Yamato behind him. Pein looked up with interest. “Aha,” he intoned, “if it isn't Kakashi Hatake, the famous Copy Ninja.”_

“ _Naruto!” cried Kakashi. “Run!”_

_The Human Path of Pein stepped out from the shadows. Naruto hesitated. “But, Sensei...”_

“ _Yamato!” barked Kakashi. “Take him! I'll handle these two myself!”_

“ _But sir...” Yamato argued. Kakashi pointed a kunai at him. “No buts! Get Naruto away from here! We've got to keep him alive at all costs!”..._

 _...Naruto was running alongside Yamato when they were ambushed by a bunch of Amegakure shinobi, and immediately he cast_ Kage Bunshin no Jutsu _, and the clones attacked the enemies with Rasengans, but in the midst of the confusion, someone had got to Yamato and he was down...he was bleeding heavily and telling Naruto to run..._

_...now he was going back the way he came, and he came to a clearing where there seemed to have been an explosion of some sort, for the grass was blackened and scorched and stumps of trees remained, and he could see a hand sticking out of a huge heap of rubble, and he began to dig frantically until he was able to uncover the owner of the hand's torso..._

_...and it was a silver-haired man with a scar over his left eye, and he was smiling, and it was only then that Naruto noticed the bodies of the two Paths of Pein who Kakashi had been fighting, and realised that he was looking at the dead body of his former sensei, and this was the first time he had ever seen his face..._

_...and he screamed, “_ Kakashi-sensei! _”..._

And then the scene changed and Naruto was standing on top of the Hokage mountain, looking down at the stone rendition of his face.

A hand tapped him on the shoulder, and he turned round to face Kakashi Hatake.

“Bloody hell, Kakashi-sensei!” he found himself saying. “You're late again!”

Kakashi shrugged. “Well, you know,” he said nonchalantly. “I got lost on...

“...the Path of Life?” Naruto finished for him. Kakashi nodded.

“Sasuke's...” Naruto began, but Kakashi cut him off and said, “I know, I saw him.”

“Am I dead?” asked Naruto. After all, he reasoned, I'm talking to a dead man.

“Hell, no,” said a familiar voice, and Naruto blinked. When he opened his eyes, he saw Jiraiya standing beside Kakashi.

“Ero-Sennin!”

“There he goes again with the 'Ero-Sennin',” said Jiraiya to Kakashi. He turned to Naruto. “Nice wedding ceremony you had there. I liked the bit where everyone was reading from The Tale Of The Gutsy Ninja.”

Naruto gaped. “You were at my wedding? But you're...you're dead.”

“Thanks for that, you tactless bastard,” said Jiraiya sarcastically. “Of course I was at your wedding. So was Kakashi. You just didn't see us. We're spirits, you know. We're everywhere. Gods, I can't believe who the new Elders are. I remember them when they were kids. Hiashi was a timid little thing and he and Shibi always kept themselves to themselves. Chouza was a nice kid, though. He always liked my books.”

“Figures,” said Kakashi to himself.

 _If this is the afterlife,_ Naruto thought, _where's Sasuke?_

As if reading his thoughts, Kakashi said, “We've come here because of Sasuke.”

“Because of Sasuke?”

Jiraiya grew serious. “Naruto,” he said. “You and Sakura named your kid after me, right? And if she was a girl, she would have been called Tsunade...no, Naruto, don't ask me how I know this, I've told you. We dead, we watch over the living. We saw you become Hokage. Your dad was with us. We always knew you'd do it some day. And you've got the potential to be as fine a Hokage as your dad was, even though you still have growing up to do...but anyway, never mind that now. You said you failed to save Sasuke, didn't you?”

Naruto nodded miserably.

“The reason why I mentioned little Jiraiya,” the older Jiraiya explained, “is because you've taken over from us as the generation who pass their knowledge, their power, their legacy onto the next. You and Sakura and Shikamaru and all the rest of you. You brought peace to Konoha, you saved the village, and you wanted to change the system. The shinobi world is a fucked-up one, it's churned out people like Gaara, Orochimaru, Sasuke. And you have the power to change all that and ensure Konoha never gets another Sasuke. You've got some good people on your side, Naruto. Chouza, Hiashi, Shikaku and Shibi might all be old men, there are and will be generational clashes, but they all have faith in you and they're all in your corner.” Kakashi, remembering how Chouza had once been among a lynch mob who had been after Naruto, that time when he stole the scroll from the Third Hokage, nodded sagely. “Little Jiraiya and all the other kids his age have the opportunity to grow up in a lifetime of peace,” the old mentor continued, “and you're the one who can make it happen. You're the one who can ensure that they don't become consumed by hatred like Sasuke was.”

“Don't beat yourself up, Naruto,” Kakashi said gently. “Sasuke had nothing to live for anymore. He wanted to die. And speaking of which, there's another thing we've come to tell you. Sasuke is one of the reasons why Konoha won the war.”

Naruto was shocked. After he gained his composure, he asked, “How?”

“When Sakura found Madara, he was injured, right?” said Jiraiya. “And she finished him off. She destroyed his real body. Well, it was Sasuke who tipped her off, who told her where it was, and it was Sasuke who used his Mangekyo Sharingan to weaken Madara.”

“Why did she never tell me this?” asked Naruto angrily.

“She was afraid no-one would believe her. I mean, as far as Konoha at large are concerned, Sasuke is the traitor who abandoned the village, and everyone remembers Sakura's crush on him and how badly she took him leaving. They'd think she was making it up, trying to make him look good.”

“And why should I believe you?” Naruto retorted. “This isn't real, is it? It's a dream. I'm not dead, I'm alive, and maybe someone's fucking with my head and...oh, I don't know.”

Jiraiya shrugged. “Up to you, kid,” he said. “But this is what happened.”

“You must honour and forgive Sasuke, Naruto,” said Kakashi. “That's it.”

“Forgiving is easy,” said Naruto sadly, “but honour him? How?”

“You'll find a way, Naruto,” said Kakashi. He removed his mask and smiled at Naruto, and Naruto, remembering the time he found Kakashi's body, wanted to cry. “You'lll find a way.”

“See you around one day, kid,” said Jiraiya, patting Naruto on the shoulder. “And good luck.”

Naruto sat bolt upright. He was back in the real world again, in the bedroom of the Hokage building, Sakura sleeping quietly next to him. He knew what he must do.

“I may not have been able to save you, Sasuke,” he said aloud, “but it's not over yet.”


	12. Doberman Pinscher: The Funeral of Sasuke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The events of this chapter concern the goings-on in Konoha while Kankuro was suspended from his job, and which Kiba mentioned in his letter in the last chapter. Because of the length of the chapter, it has been divided into parts.

**Part 3: The Funeral of Sasuke**

A day after the chaos caused by Sasuke, Kiba, Shikamaru, Temari, Chouji and Yumi were sitting on the grass outside the Akimichi compound. The clan were celebrating Chouza's promotion to Jounin Commander; word had got out that he had been elected by both shinobi and civilians for his incredible courage and strength of character during the war. Naruto and Sakura had sent their apologies, stating he had work to catch up with, and Jiraiya to attend to. Shikamaru reckoned – rightly – that they also needed time to recover from Sasuke's death and just wanted to be left alone.

Shikamaru noticed that Chouji seemed more subdued and contemplative than usual, and asked him, “You OK?”

Chouji nodded, but he was still frowning.

“Sanae?” Shikamaru wondered aloud.

“Kind of,” said Chouji. “It's just...” He paused, bit his lip, and continued. “I'm not sure if I should tell you all this, but...well...Dad's being weird at the moment. It's...oh, everything. He's still feeling guilty about Sanae. Not being able to help her. And I think he's still down about the war and so many of us dying. I mean, I know we're supposed to use our jutsu for defensive reasons, but, well...” Shikamaru felt slightly sick at the implications of what his friend was saying.

“Chouza seems to be coping pretty well,” commented Kiba. “Mum and me were talking to him earlier. He seems happy enough.”

Chouji frowned. “Dad's _too_ happy, if you ask me. It's almost like he's overcompensating.”

Yumi nodded. She twisted one of her skinny blonde braids round her fingers and said, “He's puttin' on a front. It wouldnae be bad if it wisnae sae obvious. I dinna want tae say onnything as Chouji an' I aren't married yet” - Chouji placed his hand on hers - “and I'm no' officially in the clan. But it's botherin' us both.”

“I'm walking on eggshells with him,” said Chouji. His eyes were downcast, and he looked tired and sad. “I just know if I say or do the wrong thing, I'll push him over the edge.”

Yumi shifted her weight towards her fiance and squeezed his hand. “Dinna think aboot it too much, Chouji-kun. Yer da's a wonderful man.” Kiba felt a pang of sadness. Temari was indoors, Chouji and Yumi were holding hands and snuggled up together, and meanwhile, Kankuro was far away, in another country.

 _I miss him so much,_ thought Kiba. _I wish he was here._

He was shaken out of his thoughts when a toad hopped into his lap and said, “Ah, there you are, Inuzuka-san. Naruto-sama wants you.”

“Why?” asked Kiba. He placed a hand on Akamaru's back.

“He'll tell you when you get there,” croaked the toad. “C'mon, dogboy.”

“Aha,” said Shikamaru, smiling lopsidedly. “The plot thickens. Pissed off the Hokage recently, have you?”

“Fuck off,” said Kiba, but he was smiling too. “I'd better see what Naruto-sama wants. Probably wants me to sniff out something for him. C'mon, Akamaru. Let's go.” The toad hopped out of Kiba's lap, and man and dog followed him.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

“You want me to do _what_?”

“You 'eard,” said Fukasaku, who was sitting on Naruto's shoulder. Kiba wasn't entirely sure how to take being bossed around by toads, but he knew they were the Hokage's summons, and his greatest and most powerful allies. “Find Sasuke's body. Dig 'im up.”

Kiba's eyes grew wide. “But Naruto...forgive me, but are you crazy? I mean, how am I going to get away with it? And what are we going to do with the body?”

Sakura looked at him as if he had just urinated on her shoes. “Bring him back to the village, of course.”

“And how,” demanded Kiba, “are we going to do that?”

Naruto pointed to another toad that was crouching on his desk, and replied, “This little guy.”

“Bollocks,” Kiba blurted out. He yelped as Fukasaku whacked his hand with a stick, crying, “Mind yer manners, young gent! Yer in the presence of the 'Okage!”

“Don't you 'bollocks' me,” growled Naruto. “This toad can change his size. He carries things in his belly, so we won't have to worry about Sasuke's corpse rotting, as the toad's stomach can preserve dead bodies...”

“ _Naruto!_ ” yelped Sakura.

Naruto ignored his wife and went on. “So the plan is, we find where Sasuke was buried, and this little fella takes him into the village and keeps him inside his belly. No-one'll suspect a thing. So. Kiba? You going to do this or what?”

“I don't have much of a choice, do I?” Kiba said.

“No,” said Sakura, “you don't.” Kiba shivered. He knew she was capable of smashing the ground open with a single punch, and that she had fought the Akatsuki leader in the Battle of Konoha. She was not someone he particularly wanted to fuck with. He took Sasuke's forehead protector from Sasuke, pressed it to his nose, inhaled Sasuke's scent – still there after all these years – and held it under Akamaru's nose for him to sniff.

“Don't worry,” Naruto reassured Kiba. “Your mum won't find out.”

“So, then,” said Kiba, “where do you think he's been buried? Will they have buried him in the cemetery?” A horrid thought struck him. “And what if they burned him? How will I be able to find his ashes?”

“They wun't 'ave given 'im a proper funeral,” argued Fukasaku, “not wiv 'im bein' a traitor.” Sakura concurred. “They didn't burn him.”

“How do you know?” asked Kiba, surprised.

“Overheard the ANBU guys talking about it while I was off to heal Chouza,” said Sakura. “They said something about him being in a shallow grave. I didn't see where they went with his body, but I honestly think they buried him outside the village.”

“What about one of the green spaces? Like, the training grounds?” suggested Kiba.

“Oh, please, Kiba,” said Sakura irritably. “Like they'd bury him there.”

“What abaht the mahntain behind the Akimichi compound?” Fukasaku suggested, and immediately Kiba thought, _Please, Inari, please don't make me go down to the Akimichi compound_. He remembered the conversation he'd had with Chouji at the party. Luckily, Sakura disagreed. “Oh, come on,” she argued. “Like they'd trouble themselves carrying a body all the way up the mountain. Anyway, Chouza's one of the more religious clan heads, isn't he? He'd veto it on account of Sasuke's spirit bringing misfortune or something. And I remember Iruka saying once that the other noble clans hated the Uchiha.”

“Rules out the other compounds,” said Naruto, contemplatively. He'd spent most of the conversation deep in thought. “'Cos I doubt _any_ of the clans would want him being buried near them, not just the Akimichi or the Hyuuga. Hey, how religious are the Inuzuka, Kiba?”

 _Of all the bloody things_ , thought Kiba. “Weeellll,” he said aloud, “we worship Inari in our clan. I mean, we're not like the Akimichi or the Uchi-I mean, like some of the other clans, but we go to the Inari and Uke-mochi shrine on New Year's and stuff. But, I dunno, one of us probably would have sniffed him out somehow. Why do you ask?”

“Just curious,” said Naruto. “Hey, that's cool. We have the same god in common. I worship Inari too.”

Kiba stared. “I didn't know you were religious.” _He's probably trying not to think about Sasuke,_ he rightly thought.

Naruto shrugged. “Sort of. Anyway. So the clans are out. Sakura's right, we're going to have to go out of the village and search outside the gate. Possibly further.”

“You mean we're going to search the whole bloody forest?” said Kiba, aghast. “Naruto-sama, forgive me, but are you crazy? It'll take forever.”

Naruto, sensing his wife was gearing up to punch Kiba in the face, stepped in front of her, and it seemed as though he had suddenly become alert. Had he been a dog, his ears would have pricked up.

“No, we won't. I have a feeling.”

Sakura raised an eyebrow and waited for Naruto to continue.

“They buried him near the village. Somewhere outside the gate.”

“You sure abaht that?” Fukasaku asked, and Naruto nodded firmly.

Sakura, meanwhile, was wondering how to get out of the village without being seen. “Will all of us fit inside him?” she asked Fukasaku, pointing at the other toad.

“Nah,” said Fukasaku. “At the very least we could get Kiba an' 'is dog in there, but I fink that's it.”

“We'll just have to risk it,” said Sakura sternly. “Anyway, it's not exactly unusual for shinobi to go training at night. Fukasaku can reverse summon Naruto, and I'll make my own way down there.” She pointed at the toad. “Get in, you two.”

Akamaru whined, and Kiba was not pleased. “How am I supposed to do tha-” He broke off as the toad opened its mouth inconceivably wide and swallowed him and Akamaru.

“Plonker,” muttered Sakura, as the toad hopped onto her shoulder. To Fukasaku and Naruto, she said, “See you outside the village.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

When they had left the village, the toad opened its huge mouth, and regurgitated a white-faced Kiba and a trembling dog. Kiba shook his head rapidly.

“Urrrgh,” he moaned. “I never want to do _that_ again.”

Sakura tapped him on the nose and ordered, “Stop whining and start sniffing, you.” She held out Sasuke's forehead protector. Dog and man inhaled the scent, and began to sniff, moving away from the village in different directions. Hours seemed to pass. Kiba felt his eyelids grow heavy, and prayed to Inari that his mission would be successful. His back ached, his eyes were dry and full of dust, his feet were beginning to ache, his neck was growing stiff and he longed to lay his head down and sleep, _but_ , he reminded himself, _I am a shinobi of Konoha, Naruto is an old friend of mine, and if I say no, I'll be disobeying an order of the Hokage and Sakura will beat the living shit out of me._ He liked Sakura, but she didn't half remind him of his mum on a bad day at times.

The duo walked around in circles, each circle wider than the last, noses to the ground and in the air respectively. Sakura was getting increasingly frustrated, as was Fukusaku, but Naruto remained resolute. “He's around here somewhere,” he kept saying, “I know he is!”

“'E'd better be,” muttered Fukasaku. “The missus's gonna start wonderin' where I am an' send aht a search party at this rate.”

Kiba was not as religious as Hinata or Chouji, but deep down, he had always believed in the gods and the spirits. On the feast day of Inari, he and his clan, along with the Akimichis, had always visited the Shrine of Inari and Uke-mochi, the shrine of their respective gods, and obviously he did New Year and the other main festivals, but he didn't visit the shrine otherwise unless he absolutely had to. He rarely prayed, not even after missions when he'd had to kill someone, and felt embarrassed and awkward when he saw Shibi and Chouza wandering around in their black kimono with ashes on their faces, or artefacts being paraded through the streets, or the prayers and offerings at funerals. He'd always thought that his faith had purely been out of duty; and yet, he could feel every fibre of his being crying out to Inari-sama to help him and his fellow believer – he wasn't entirely sure who Sakura's principal god was, and guessed it might be either Inari, Gama, or Oukuninushi – to find Sasuke's body. _Maybe I should pray to Benten_ , he thought, and again, he felt that familiar pang that came whenever he thought of Kankuro. _Benten and Hachiman were the Puppet Squad's gods, weren't they?_

And then it happened.

Inari-sama had been listening, for Akamaru began to bark, and Kiba realised why as he ran towards his dog and, without warning, a familiar smell hit him. He turned his head from side to side, trying to work out the direction the scent was coming from, and deduced that it was at ten o'clock, northwest. Naruto, Fukasaku and Sakura followed him, and the scent grew stronger. Sasuke's body had not, thankfully, begun to rot, so the scent had not been corrupted, although there was a slight tinge caused by the beginning stages of death. When the smell was at its strongest, without a word from Sakura or Naruto, Kiba cast _Juujin Bunshin_ , and he and Akamaru began to dig. The two figures squatted on all fours and tore chunks out of the earth, flinging it in all directions. Before long, Naruto and Sakura had joined them. Sakura, channelling chakra into her hands, was ripping great pieces of earth out, and the smell became overpowering.

Naruto stifled a gasp as Sasuke's foot appeared. Then another foot. Meanwhile, Kiba discovered a pair of Sasuke's fingers, then a whole hand. He crawled over the body and dug away until Sasuke's right arm was unearthed.

The digging grew more frantic. Sakura's arms and face were covered with dirt, and she was ripping away at the ground like a madwoman. Kiba released his technique and Akamaru turned back into a dog, and as he kicked away more earth, more of Sasuke's body began to appear, until the mud and soil had been cleared away and Sasuke Uchiha lay in the ground, his eyes shut and his mouth hanging open. Almost tenderly, Sakura closed it.

Naruto was on all fours like a dog. Kiba could have sworn he was going to howl, and Akamaru bounded over and nuzzled his face, licking up the tears that were streaming from Naruto's eyes. Fukasaku and Sakura began to lift the body out of the shallow grave, and laid Sasuke on the grass.

Naruto dragged himself over to Sasuke and cradled his team mate's body in his arms. Instinctively, as Kiba and Akamaru quickly filled in the hole, Sakura pushed back Sasuke's black hair and tied the old forehead protector across his head.

“He looks like he's sleeping,” Naruto said through his tears. “So calm. So cold. So cold.”

“Naruto, darling, please,” begged Sakura, wrapping her arms around her husband's shoulders, “please be strong. We've got to get him back into Konoha.” Fukasaku agreed. “Save the cryin' for later, will yer? We've gotta bring 'im 'ome. People'll talk.”

Naruto swallowed hard and wiped his eyes. “I wish Jiraiya was here.”

“'E'd unnerstand, Naruto,” croaked Fukasaku. “An' yer own li'l Jiraiya's gonna wonder where 'is mum an' dad are if yer don't get 'ome soon.” He gestured to the other toad. “Load 'im up.”

Reluctantly, Naruto carried Sasuke over to the toad, and the toad swallowed him and hopped away. Kiba and Akamaru finished filling in the hole, and layered grass over it. Fukasaku summoned another toad, and ordered it to take Kiba and Akamaru back into the village. Kiba groaned inwardly at the thought of spending more time in the belly of a toad, but was too tired to say no, and let it swallow him and Akamaru and take them back to the Hokage's building.

Sakura placed an arm around Naruto's waist, and he in turn placed his arm round her shoulders.

“We'd better get some shuteye once we get back,” he said. “Shikamaru and Neji can handle things. And besides...we've got a lot of planning to do.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

“Tenten,” Lee said. “I want you.”

Tenten looked up from the papers she was marking. “Oh, hi, Lee. What's up? You interested in any of my students?”

“Not quite, no,” said Lee, frowning. “I met Neji earlier and he gave me these.” He took two scrolls out from under his flak jacket. “One is for me. The other is for you. He said it is something very important and that we are not to let anyone see it.”

“Maybe it's from Naruto-sama,” speculated Tenten. “Some S-rank mission or something. As you can see, I've got a free period, so we may as well look at the scrolls now, and then we can destroy them before any of the other jounin turn up.”

“Well, then,” said Lee, “let us get this over with.” The two jounin unsealed their scrolls. Tenten's dark eyes widened. Lee found himself leaning on her desk for support.

“Is Naruto-sama quite mad?” he finally managed to say after the two of them had recovered from the shock.

“Well, you and I know the answer to that, but I'm sure he knows what he's doing,” said Tenten severely. “And Neji, Sakura and Shikamaru aren't stupid. Here, give me your scroll. I'll seal them in one of my weapons scrolls and destroy the evidence later.” She smiled at Lee. “I've got some explosives I need to test anyway.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Shikamaru wandered around the Academy, peeking through the windows of the classrooms, until he found the one where Chouji was sitting and marking homework. He banged on the window.

“Who is it?” came Chouji's voice.

“Me,” said Shikamaru. “Can I come in?”

“OK,” called Chouji, and Shikamaru entered. He found Chouji leaning over a pile of books and chewing his pen. _Typical Chouji_ , Shikamaru thought. _Always with something in his mouth._

“I swear,” sighed Chouji, “some of these kids are clueless. I'm surprised they can form sentences, let alone hand seals.”

“The Hokage was one of those clueless kids once,” Shikamaru pointed out. “It's alright, Chouji, I appreciate you're busy. I came to give you this.” He dropped a pack of bubble gum on Chouji's desk. “I thought you might need this to help you concentrate. Be careful with the packaging. Anyway, I'm off. See you later.” He left, and went back to the Hokage's building.

Chouji tore open the pack, confused, and found a tiny piece of rice paper rolled up and stuffed inside, between the pieces of gum and the packaging. He opened it, and saw that it was in Shikamaru's familiar precise handwriting.

Chouji carefully copied the note and tried to think of a pretext that would enable him to give it to Ino. Once he had finished, he put the original note in his mouth and ate it. _Shikamaru_ , he thought as he popped the entire pack of gum in his mouth, _knows me only too well_. He shut his eyes, leaned back in his chair, inhaled deeply, and began to blow bubbles. For some reason, it helped him relax and focus. _Like Asuma-sensei's smoking, except it'll fuck up my teeth, not my lungs,_ he thought.

He wondered what in the world was going through the Hokage's head, and an idea hit him.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Ino was arranging a window display when Chouji entered Yamanaka Florists, carrying what appeared to be a slightly battered-looking silvery vase. “Alright,” he said. “I thought you'd want this. We've been clearing some stuff out at our place.”

Ino studied the vase. It was simple in design, not too flashy or ostentatious. The rim was a crooked circle, rather than a perfect one, and the body of the vase looked as if it had been beaten with a hammer to achieve the texture, which was reminiscent of the skin of an orange, but with larger pits. It reminded her of that _wabi-sabi_ thing her dad was always banging on about. _We've already got a load of vases,_ she thought, _but oh, sod it. One more won't hurt._ Out loud, she said, “Cheers. How much do you want for it?”

“Nothing,” said Chouji, handing it over, “it's on the house.” As Chouji passed Ino the vase, she heard a rustling noise coming from it. Chouji heard it too, and said, “You might want to have a look inside.”

On her break, Ino went into the back of the shop, put her hand in the vase, and drew out a letter. A Post-It note, also in Chouji's handwriting, was attached to it.

_Ino,_

_Pass this on to Sai when youve read it. He needs to see it. Dont let Inoichi or Ayame find it whatever you do._

_Chouji_

Intrigued, Ino opened the note and began to read.

“Naruto, you nutter,” she said to herself, “you'd better have a damn good reason for this.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

As they left their ANBU briefing, Sai slipped a page torn from his sketchbook into Shino's back pocket. When he was alone, Shino removed the paper from his pocket and read the message on it. Underneath, Sai had written:

_NB: make sure you copy this down as the ink will disappear in three hours._

_\- S_

Shino was aware that Sai used ink for various jutsu, but he'd never seen him write with it. However, given the content of the message, he was not at all surprised that Sai had taken precautions. He read the message several times over, until he had memorised its entire content.

Outside the ANBU base, Shino concealed himself in the bushes, and began to communicate with his bugs.

“Find Hinata,” he told them silently, “and when you find her, this is what you must tell her.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

As Hinata fed her small son, she noticed what appeared to be a fine black mist seeping in through the window. With Hiroshi still latched on to her breast, she activated her Byakugan, and recognised straight away that it was Shino's bugs.

 _How odd_ , she thought. _Isn't he supposed to be training right now? What's going on?_

The bugs settled on the wall opposite Hinata and began to rearrange themselves into words, then into a sentence:

THIS IS A MESSAGE FROM THE HOKAGE

Then they dissolved and formed themselves into another sentence, and another, and another, and then Hinata saw her name and the names of her friends and former classmates on the wall, and realised this was something very serious indeed; something so serious that if her father found out...she tried not to think about the consequences. She thought of Chouji, and wondered if he had felt the same way.

“No wonder Shino chose this way to tell me,” she said to herself. She pressed Hiroshi's warm little body closer to her own, and stroked the top of his fuzzy head.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kiba was taking Akamaru for a walk when he met Sakura and Jiraiya.

“Hi, Kiba,” said Sakura, “hi, Akamaru.” She bent down and petted the dog, tickling his ears and stroking his neck. “Can Jiraiya pet him?” she asked.

“Sure,” replied Kiba. “Don't worry, he won't bite. He'll recognise your scent and Naruto's scent on Jiraiya.”

Cautiously, Jiraiya patted Akamaru's head. Akamaru licked his hand, and Jiraiya made a face and said, “Urrrgh. Yuk.”

“Ah, he's just being friendly,” laughed Sakura. “Anyway. We'd better get a move on. See you, Kiba.” And she walked off, Jiraiya holding her hand. Kiba noticed that Akamaru seemed agitated. He was fidgeting and making irritated noises, and seemed to be straining his neck. Kiba wondered if he had some kind of infection, and hoped it wasn't anything to do with Sasuke.

“What's itching you, Akamaru?” he asked, puzzled. The dog whined and pawed at his neck, indicating that the irritation was there, and Kiba carefully felt under the collar to see if there was indeed any kind of skin infection or bite that Hana might need to look at. It was there that he found the source of Akamaru's annoyance: a small piece of paper.

He opened it, read the message, and realised Sakura must have placed it there when she was petting the dog. Akamaru looked up at Kiba and barked.

“Well,” said Kiba, ripping the message into shreds. “That explains _everything_.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

The message that Naruto and his advisors had written was:

_To whom it may concern,_

_The funeral of Sasuke Uchiha will take place this Friday, and will be led by the Sixth Hokage Naruto Uzumaki, and the First Lady Sakura Haruno. Meet at the gates at midnight. All will be explained._

_The presence of the following people is requested:_

_Shino Aburame Chouji Akimichi_

_Hinata Hyuuga Kiba Inuzuka_

_Rock Lee Tenten_

_Ino Yamanaka Sai Yamanaka_

_Please keep the contents of this message to yourself, and destroy it once you have read it. You may pass it on to anybody whose name is on the list. If you have already received the message and another person on the list gives it to you, please inform them of the same._

_Important: do not disclose the contents to your families or partners (with the exceptions of Shikamaru Nara, Ino and Sai Yamanaka, and Kiba Inuzuka, as the Fifth Kazekage and his family are allies of Konoha, and will understand the situation)._

_Signed_

_Sakura Haruno_

_Neji Hyuuga_

_Shikamaru Nara_

_Advisors to the Sixth Hokage_

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Using shadow tendrils as ropes, Shikamaru eased himself down the wall of his house, and made his way to the meeting point he and his team mates had agreed on, a secluded spot near the village gates. Ino was already waiting for him, wrapped up in her trench coat.

“So you got out alright then?” she asked.

“No probs,” said Shikamaru. “I just hope Chouji's OK.”

Ten minutes later, Chouji arrived. “Sorry I'm late,” he apologised. “I nearly got spotted by one of my relatives. But at least Mum, Dad and Yumi won't get me, I've made sure of that.”

“What did you do?” asked Ino, intrigued. Fortunately for her, Inoichi had had a long day and had decided to give himself an early night, and Ayame, hoping she might be able to get a couple of minutes' sex out of him, had followed him upstairs. “I thought I was going to have to burn a scented candle with gas in it or something. Daddy was knackered though, so it was a piece of piss.”

Chouji smiled. “I spiked their food with powdered sleeping drugs. They're all out like a light.”

The InoShikaChou trio walked to the gates. Shikamaru noticed that Chouji appeared to be more on edge than usual, and that his eyes were darting around nervously, but he made no comment. A few shinobi wandered here and there, but none of them took much notice of the trio. After all, groups of shinobi wandering around Konoha at midnight was not an unusual sight. Ino went up to the two chuunin on patrol and had a couple of words with them. Shikamaru could have sworn she was making a couple of hand seals under her trench coat, and he was right. They let the little group pass without comment.

“Genjutsu?” asked Shikamaru, and Ino nodded. “Yeah. It was easier than I thought. We're invisible to them. Hopefully they won't notice the others.”

“I wish I wasn't so shit at genjutsu,” said Chouji. “I could have put the 'rents in one. I think the spiking will work, though.”

“Oh, Chouji,” sighed Shikamaru. “I'm not convinced that was a good idea. You did use the right amount of whatever it was, didn't you? What if you gave them too much?”

“I didn't,” said Chouji indignantly. “C'mon, Shikamaru, credit me with some intelligence, please. I gave them enough to knock them out. I got it off Sakura and she gave me the exact dosage I'd need for three large adults. They might be a bit drowsy tomorrow, but that's it. I'm not exactly happy about giving it to Yumi, but I can't let her in on it because Naruto-sama wouldn't want me to, and also in case she lets it slip and Dad finds out.”

“That would be pretty serious,” said Ino. “I can't imagine Chouza being too happy.”

Chouji shivered. “Hell, no. If this whole Sasuke thing gets back to Dad, I'm in serious. Fucking. Trouble.”

“Oh, you do exaggerate,” Ino began, but Chouji glared at her. “I'm not just saying that, Ino. Don't you understand? If Dad finds out about this, he'll do more than throw me out of the clan. _I'm risking a death sentence just by being here._ He finds out that I've been to the traitor's funeral, I'm a dead man. I may as well kill myself, save him the trouble. You saw his face when Sasuke showed up. He'd think this was fraternising with a traitor. And anyone who betrays not only the Akimichi, but the village itself...” He drew his finger across his throat.

Shikamaru stared. He'd never known about this side of his dad's team mate before.

A smll black cloud floated through the air towards them and stopped a couple of metres in front of Shikamaru's face.

 _Shino's here,_ thought Shikamaru, and he approached the black cloud, motioning for Ino and Chouji to follow him. The black cloud took off at a walking pace, leading the group towards where the others would be waiting.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Naruto stood at the head of the funeral pyre that he, Sakura, Shikamaru, Neji, Kiba and Akamaru had built, flanked by Sakura and Sai. Beside Sakura were Chouji, Shikamaru, Lee and Tenten; beside Sai were Ino, Kiba, Neji and Hinata. A few yards away, Shino and his bugs were keeping watch.

“All present and correct?” he asked, and Shikamaru nodded. “All present and correct.”

“Hinata's children are accounted for,” said Neji. “I told one of the branch women to look after them, so I could take her on patrol with me to keep me company.”

“Shino and I made sure we were on duty tonight,” added Sai, and Chouji explained simply that his father was in bed, not mentioning that his food had been spiked. Lee and Tenten had signed up for patrols as well, and Kiba had told the chuunin on the gate that he was training Akamaru. Fortunately, they had believed him.

“Right, then,” Naruto said. “So.”

The little group waited for Naruto to continue.

“You might be thinking why you've all been brought here tonight,” he began. “And why you've been asked to attend the funeral of someone who betrayed the village. Well, Sakura has something to tell you.”

Sakura took up the reins. “You might remember,” she said, “that I was fighting Madara Uchiha. He no longer had the power to phase his body through solid objects, and I was able to kill him with the medical skills I'd learned from Tsunade-sama, by destroying his real body. That he'd hidden away. However, I'm not going to take all the credit, because Madara was heavily wounded, and I didn't find the body on my own. I was finishing what someone else had started.”

The other shinobi looked at her, puzzled. Then it dawned on them.

“Are you saying...” Neji began.

“Yes,” Sakura finished. “He had severe burns all over his body, and there were all these black flames. And Sasuke was there, and I think the flames were something to do with him. And then he summoned this huge death god thing, kind of like a shield, and I couldn't make out entirely what was happening, but it was attacking Madara. When Sasuke saw me...the death god disappeared and he...he told me where to find Madara's real body, and to destroy it, and then ran off. And...well, you know what happened.”

There were gasps among the little group. Kiba muttered, “I don't fucking believe this,” and Tenten asked, “Is this really true, Sakura? You're...forgive me, but you're not just saying this to excuse Sasuke's crimes?”

“Tenten,” said Sakura, “I swear on my son's life that what I'm telling you is true. Naruto and I wouldn't have brought you all here just to lie to you. Ino, read my thoughts and see for yourself.”

Ino placed her hand on Sakura's head and closed her eyes in concentration.

“I had a confrontation with Madara,” said Naruto, “and he told me why Sasuke became how he did. His entire clan were murdered by his older brother, on the orders of the village.”

“What?” exclaimed various people, and Shikamaru said, “Naruto, how the hell can you believe him? How do you know he was telling the truth?”

Naruto merely said, “Ino, I need your help here. You can read corpses' memories, right?”

Ino nodded.

“Can you do it without machines?”

Ino hesitated, but then said, “I'll give it a go. Daddy's trained me a lot in mindreading.” She placed her hands on Sasuke's head, and her spirit made the journey into his memory. She began to unroll the scrolls that contained Sasuke's memories, until she reached his sixth year.

_A small boy with big black eyes and dark hair coming home from target practice. He is smiling. He can't wait to tell his mum and dad how well he did. He is walking to the Uchiha compound. Something is wrong...he trips over the bodies of his aunt and uncle. They are not breathing. They are cold. Then he sees the horrifying sight: bodies litter the streets, all wearing clothes with the familiar fan on his back. He is terrified. Who could have done this? What's wrong? Where's Itachi? He runs home, only to find his mum and dad lying dead on top of each other...and standing over them is his older brother..._

She was rapidly going through the scrolls of Sasuke's memories. Past the Chuunin Exams, past the invasion of Sunagakure and Otogakure, the battle with Gaara, Sasuke recovering in hospital, fighting Naruto on the roof of the building, then a group of teenage shinobi from Otogakure coming to get him...she fast forwarded again.

_Now he was fully grown. He was confronting a masked man – Madara Uchiha. Now he was restrained, and Madara was telling him the story of how Itachi had been forced to kill the clan against his wishes, on the orders of the village leaders, and how he spared his little brother not because he was not worth killing, but because he couldn't bear killing him, because he loved him...and Sasuke was crying..._

Ino's eyes began to fill with tears. Chouji and Shikamaru knew that what they were seeing was genuine. As Ino relayed what she was seeing to the other shinobi, there were gasps and cries of horror. “All this happened,” she heard Chouji say, “and we didn't even know, any of us.”

“And Sarutobi was complicit in this?” exclaimed Lee.

_Now it is the Battle of Konoha. Sasuke is confronting Madara. Blood streams from his eyes. A six-pointed star in each one. “You bastard. I will make you pay for Itachi's death. You didn't count on my Mangekyo Sharingan being able to destroy you even in your current state, did you? Thought you were invincible, did you?”_

“ _But you killed him!”_

“ _He would have died anyway, wouldn't he? And he wanted to die. I did him a favour. You have the blood of the Uchiha on your hands..._ Amaterasu _!”..._

_...fast forward four, five, six years, and now Sasuke is standing outside Konoha..._

Ino stopped. She was unable to continue. She buried her head in her hands and wept.

“Shikamaru,” said Naruto, turning to his advisor. “Didn't you say, when we were all going after Sasuke that even though you didn't like him, he was still a comrade of ours?” Shikamaru nodded.

“Neji, Chouji, Shikamaru, Kiba, Lee. All of you risked your lives to help me bring Sasuke home. You didn't know what he'd been through, you were only trying to save a comrade. As Shikamaru said, he was one of us. Even though I know now he wanted to go to Orochimaru, he was still one of us and I...I didn't want him to seek revenge on his own. I wanted to help him. I failed.” He swallowed. “Every time I found Sasuke, I could never bring him home. He didn't want to know. He even claimed he'd kill me on a whim...but he spared me, and Sakura. Even after all he went through, and even when he came to Konoha with Akatsuki, he couldn't kill us.”

Now Lee and Chouji were wiping tears from their eyes, and Shikamaru took off his glasses, as his eyes too began to hurt. Sai was awkwardly stroking Ino's back.

“I couldn't save Sasuke,” said Naruto, and his voice shook, and Hinata bit her lip. “But what I can do is ensure he gets a proper funeral. And moreover, what I can do is ensure that while I am Hokage, there will never be another Sasuke. The ninja world has been filled with hatred for too long. Yes, we're shinobi, we kill, it's what we do, but at the end of the day, we are human beings. Sakura, remember when we met Zabuza and Haku, and Zabuza might have thought he was a demon and that Haku was only his tool, and yet, when Haku died, Zabuza still mourned him?”

“Yes,” Sakura whispered. “And Sasori, too. He tried to become a puppet, but he remained a human even when he died.” Kiba, remembering what Kankuro had told him, inhaled sharply.

“Those two shinobi,” Naruto continued, “were products of a fucked-up village. And so was Sasuke. Konoha did all this to him. Konoha killed his family, and Konoha killed Sasuke in the end. Sasuke might have defected, but in the end, he was still one of us. Maybe he only killed himself because he needed to be at peace or because he didn't want to die at Konoha's hands. But I know this much; I'm not going to be like him. He was consumed by revenge. I killed Pein as an act of revenge for Jiraiya-sensei and Kakashi-sensei and Captain Yamato, but as far as I'm concerned now, that was my last act of revenge. Never again will I raise a hand in revenge, because that will only make the cycle of hatred continue, and what do we get? More wars. More Sasukes.

“Now that I am Hokage, I'm going to change Konoha. There will be no massacres of clans, because no clan will end up being pushed out of normal society. Same with any family. There will be no more hatred between the people of Konoha. There will be no more people like Sasuke, like Pein, like Zabuza and Sasori and Gaara and everyone else who's been fucked over by the ninja system. Not in this village, as long as I'm in charge. I can't force everyone to love each other – I might be an idiot, but I'm not that much of an idiot – but I can try to make Konoha a better place. So that my son, and Shikamaru's daughter, and Hinata's son and daughter, and Asuma and Kurenai's son” - here, Shikamaru broke down - “and Kiba's nephews, and all the rest of us can grow up in a future where we are all united by the Will of Fire, by the need to defend the village we love and make it stronger than any other hidden village. Yes, I'm naive, I'm a fool, but I don't fucking care. This is my ninja way. And you know me, I'm not going back on it.” And he finally let himself cry, and Sakura hugged him.

Before Kiba even knew what was going on, his forehead protector was yanked from his head, and Hinata had tied it across her own forehead.

“Naruto-sama,” she choked out, “after everything you've said...I can't go on the way I have been. I'm going to go back into service. I want to be a shinobi again, so that I too can protect this village – not only for my husband and children's sakes, not only for the sake of my clan, but because you've inspired me too, Naruto-sama! Thank you!” And she burst into tears, and Kiba threw his arms around his team mate and held her tight, and whispered, “Fucking hell, Hinata, that was amazing. I'm so proud of you.” He could have sworn Shino was smiling under his mask.

On Sakura's orders, the group bowed their heads in silent prayer for Sasuke. Then Shikamaru and Chouji stepped forward, and Sakura nodded. Shikamaru cried, “ _Katon, Goukakyuu no Jutsu!_ ” and Chouji shouted, “ _Fuuton, Daitoppa!_ ”, and they both took immense breaths, puffed out their cheeks, and Shikamaru blew out a great fireball, lighting the funeral pyre, while Chouji blew out a great gust of wind, fanning the flames. Naruto prayed silently to the gods, and to Sasuke's kami, and again, Akamaru howled as Sasuke's ghost appeared.

Then Naruto spoke again. He had managed to regain some of his composure.

“Sai, Shikamaru, Ino, Chouji, Kiba, Hinata, Shino, Lee, Neji, Tenten. Thank you for coming. And remember, don't tell anyone what you saw here. You may all go now. Sakura and me will make our own way back.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

It was two days after the funeral of Sasuke Uchiha, and everything had finally returned to normal.

Kiba sat at his desk and began to write to Kankuro, updating him on everything that had happened. He had leave coming up soon and was hoping to spend it in Suna.

Chouza Akimichi's atonement period was up at last. He was relieved, to say the least. No longer would he have to smear ash on his face and pray to the gods for forgiveness and wear that fucking black kimono every day. Zakuro seemed to be coping a lot better, but a part of her had died with Sanae; she had become less nervy and talkative, and more contemplative. She had been ordered to take a course of anti-depressants, and had returned to service. _Maybe_ , Chouza thought, _now she's calmed down,_ _this means that she'll be able to keep an eye on Momo now._ He'd always worried about the girl. She and Chouji couldn't have been more different. OK, so she wasn't going to pull an Itachi Uchiha – she was far too loyal to her clan and village for that – but she seemed to derive a little too much pleasure from torturing her enemies to death and had a cruel streak that he recognised in himself, but which, unlike her, he tried to suppress. He hoped she wouldn't apply to work for Ibiki, but took some consolation in the fact that, as head of the Akimichi clan, he had every right to veto it if she did.

Chouji, returning from the Academy, found his father sitting on the porch of the Akimichi compound. “Evening, Dad,” he said.

“Evening,” said Chouza, forcing himself to smile. Seeing his son standing there looking down at him, in his red armoured coat with his clan breastplate and his reddish-brown ponytail – almost a foot long now – made him feel as if the roles were reversed, as if Chouji was the parent and he was the child. Chouji was still in his early twenties, but by Tsukiyomi, he'd changed so much. All because of the war.

And then a noise began in Chouza's head. It was the noise he had been trying to shut out. He began to toy with his headband, praying the noise would stop. _I must be strong for Chouji. I must be strong for Chouji...for the clan..._

Chouji frowned. “Dad?”

 _I must be strong for the clan,_ Chouza told himself. _I must...I must..._ his smile became lopsided. His throat hurt.

“Dad? Are you alright?”

_I can't cry in front of Chouji. I can't...I can't...please...please make the noise stop..._

“It's OK, Dad,” Chouji said gently, and he sat down next to the older man and laid a hand on his shoulder. “I'm your son. You don't have to put on a brave face for me.”

Chouza stared at him wordlessly. Tears formed in the corners of his small dark eyes.

“It's OK,” Chouji repeated, and Chouza collapsed into his son's arms, buried his head in the crook of Chouji's neck, and began to cry.


	13. Shiba Inu

 Kankuro was going to be an uncle, again.

Ino, Temari, and Yumi Ito – or Yumi Akimichi, as she was now known since her marriage to Chouji and initiation into his clan – had, by some miracle of the gods, all fallen pregnant. Yumi and Temari had been first, with babies both due at the tail end of November, and then it was Ino's turn. The three members of Team 10 agreed that it must be some kind of sign, and that a third InoShikaChou trio was on the way. The original InoShikaChou trio were going to be grandfathers – for the second time, in Shikaku's case – and the three of them had gone out to celebrate. It had been a good year for them so far; Chouza had turned fifty in April, as had Shikaku in July – Inoichi, the baby of the team, had to wait until January - so Akimichi and Nara clans had been celebrating their heads' respective birthdays as well as the pregnancies. Although Kankuro had not been able to attend the Yamanakas' celebration of Ino's pregnancy, due to being called out to aid Hinata, Kiba and a couple of others on a mission, Chouji had invited him to Chouza's celebration, and he'd made sure he'd booked time off for Shikaku's birthday, on Temari's request. Of the original InoShikaChou trio, Shikaku was the one with whom Kankuro got on the best. Although Chouza had stopped regarding him as an enemy, and he and Inoichi were friendly enough – although Inoichi was the quieter of the two, and Kankuro sometimes wondered if he was all there – Kankuro found Shikaku much easier to talk to. There was something calming, almost Zen about him. Although he was the original Jounin Commander, and Kankuro knew of his reputation for being a brilliant shadow manipulator with a mind like a machine, away from war he was a gentle, even-tempered man with a love of nature and animals, who clearly adored his little granddaughter. Kankuro also had to admit that the blunt, informal Chouza and the wry, contemplative Shikaku made a fantastic double act. _Always taking the piss out of each other_ , he thought, _and yet they're as close as hell and they'd do anything for each other. Just like their sons. And Kiba and me_.

On a cold day at the tail end of November, when the leaves in Konoha were turning a rich shade of brown and dropping from the trees in great showers, when the air was as clean and sharp as a chakra-infused knife and you could see your own breath, Temari was returning with Kankuro from a meeting with the Hokage when she suddenly doubled over and clutched her stomach. Kankuro was concerned, and immediately placed an arm round his sister's shoulders, as she leaned on the doorframe of the Nara compound for support.

“It's coming,” Temari gasped. “I can feel it.”

“Are you sure?” Kankuro asked.

“Of course I'm sure, you tit,” growled Temari. With one hand still on the doorframe, she dragged herself into the Nara house and collapsed on all fours, and it was then that her waters broke and gushed all over the floor of the hallway, a thin smear of blood slowly creeping through the mess like a red worm. Kankuro called for help, and Yoshino and Shikaku came running out of the kitchen.

“Temari!” cried Yoshino. “Are you OK?” She looked at the puddle of amniotic fluid on the floor. “My gods! It's happening already?”

“The baby,” moaned Temari. She heaved herself up. “Got to...get to the...hospital...aargh! Shit! I can't move!” She collapsed on her backside, propping herself up on her hands.

Yoshino sprang into action. She squatted down on all fours, made the seal of the Rat and said, “ _Kage Mane no Jutsu_.” In an instant, her shadow had attached itself to Temari's, and she got up slowly and carefully, taking Temari with her. When Temari was on her feet, Yoshino placed Temari's arm over her shoulders, placed her own arm around Temari's waist, and said, “I'll take you to the hospital. Do you think you can manage?”

Temari nodded, and doubled over in pain again. Yoshino wasted no time. She turned to her husband and Kankuro, and ordered, “You two, stay here and look after Taki,” and escorted Temari to Konoha Hospital.

“I want Shikamaru,” Kankuro heard Temari say. Yoshino's answer was inaudible, but Kankuro knew Temari would be looked after; her mother-in-law meant business.

“Should one of us get Shikamaru?” he asked Shikaku. The older man shook his head and said, “Yosh will do it. Don't worry about him for now.” He went into the living room, and Kankuro followed him.

There came the patter of small feet down the stairs, and Takarazuka Nara entered the room, rubbing her eyes. “Where's Mummy?” she asked Shikaku.

“She's gone to the hospital with your granny,” said Shikaku, “and when she comes back, she's going to bring you a new baby brother or sister.”

Taki muttered something that sounded like 'troublesome', and Kankuro snorted. Shikaku began to set up a shougi board. “Taki?” he asked his granddaughter. “You want to play?”

“She's three years old!” Kankuro said, exasperated.

“Your point?” said Shikaku. “Just because she's three doesn't mean she's an idiot, Kankuro.” He held up one of the pieces. “What's this, Taki?”

“Knight,” said the little girl without hesitation. “Like my daddy.”

“And this?” Shikaku asked, holding up another piece.

“King, like Sir Naruto.”

“And this?”

“Silver.”

“So she knows the pieces,” Kankuro said, “but can she play?”

“No need to talk 'bout me, Uncle Kankuro,” said the little girl calmly. “I'm right here.”

“That's you told,” laughed Shikaku, and he and Taki began to play a game. Kankuro was admittedly clueless about shougi, but he was curious to see whether his little niece could actually play. To his surprise, she actually seemed to understand the rules, and a couple of times Shikaku scratched his head and said, “Well. That was unexpected.” Looking at the dark-haired little creature moving the pieces around, frowning in contemplation just like her father, Kankuro found himself thinking that a kid who could play shougi with her grandad at three could make a pretty damn good puppeteer. After all, it was a job that required you to use your brain as well as your fingers, if not more. _Maybe in a couple of years_ , he thought, _I could train her._

Realising he should make himself useful, Kankuro padded into the Naras' kitchen. He filled a metal bucket with water and cleaning solution, and carrying it in one hand and brandishing a mop over his shoulder like a katana with the other, went out into the hallway and began to wipe up the mess. He could not help but laugh at the situation; here he was, a jounin of Suna and now Konoha, cleaning up the fluid that had leaked from his sister's womb. _Even shinobi_ , he thought, _have to do the housework._

When he finished, he went back into the living room to see how Shikaku and Taki's game was going, and found Shikaku sitting in a chair, one arm slung over the side, with his granddaughter curled up in his lap. Both of them were fast asleep.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

“...so, Matsuzaka's team have sent us a report saying they arrived safely in Kumogakure and will be heading back in a couple of days,” Neji was saying to Naruto, as Shikamaru, Hiashi, Shibi, Chouza and Sakura were gathered around the Hokage's desk and looking at a map with a couple of ninja escort routes drawn on it, when Yoshino Nara came thundering in, almost breaking the door off its hinges.

“Do you mind?” said Hiashi, annoyed. “We're in the middle of a meeting here.”

“Shikamaru,” said Yoshino, ignoring the Hyuuga clan head, “Temari's in labour. She needs you. Now.”

Naruto pointed to the door and said, “Go.” As Shikamaru and Yoshino were about to leave, he added, “Good luck.”

“Thank you,” said Shikamaru, bowing, and he and his mother dashed off to the hospital.

“Ah, well,” said Hiashi, sighing. “I suppose it can't be helped. It seems to be quite the season for births in Konoha. One of the kunoichi in the branch family has just given birth to twins, and Shibi, I believe your daughter is expecting?”

“Yes,” said the Aburame clan head. “Suzumebachi is due to give birth in March, I think.”

“It's so weird to think you're all going to be grandfathers,” laughed Naruto. “And you already are, Hiashi and Chouza.” Hiashi smiled faintly at this, forgiving Naruto for dropping the 'sama', and Neji was lost in thought. The births of Hiyori and Hiroshi, his niece and nephew, seemed to have had some kind of softening effect on his stern uncle. At a recent festival, Hiashi had carried little Hiyori on his back without a word of complaint, and had played with her and her brother while Hinata and Kou went off to spend some time alone together. Neji hoped fervently that he would be kinder to the grandchildren than he had been to either of his daughters. Chouji, meanwhile, had become a father three days ago, when his wife had given birth to a little girl, as yet unnamed. Shikamaru had told Neji that when Chouza had held his baby granddaughter for the first time, he had burst into tears of happiness. Shikaku had teased him until Inoichi had reminded him, “You cried when Taki was born, Pineapple. So shut it.”

 _Of all these men_ , Neji thought. _I am the only one who will never be a father_. It didn't bother him as much as he thought it would. He knew his asexuality had cost him any chance of settling down with a woman and fathering a child, and he was happy enough to be an uncle to Hinata's children. Certainly, he was not the only one on his team who was not interested in starting a family. Although Lee had recently talked of adopting a child, Tenten, at least, was adamant that she never wanted children. “Even if I wasn't a dyke,” she had recently said, “I wouldn't be having kids. I don't mind teaching them, that's cool, but being a mum? No way. There are dead animals with more maternal instincts than me. And I really don't want to have to take time out of my job. I can't afford to.”

“OK,” he said, rousing himself out of his reverie. “So where were we?”

“Once we're done here, by the way,” Chouza said, “if it's alright with you, Naruto-sama, I'd like to go to the shrine to pray for Shikamaru. I'll try not to be too long.”

“Take as long as you want, Chouza,” said Naruto kindly, remembering the birth of his own son. “Take as long as you want.” And he returned to poring over the map, his pencil between his teeth.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Sitting in the Nara kitchen, his chin resting on his hands, Kankuro remembered the day he had returned to Konoha. He had brought a letter of reference from Gaara, stating that Kankuro wished to help out at the Academy, in order to study the teaching methods of Konoha and report back to Suna. What he did not say in the letter, but what Kiba and Naruto knew only too well, was that Kankuro had had problems with his job back in Suna, and although the Academy had retracted his suspension, he had decided to leave Suna until things had calmed down.

To say that Kiba had been happy to see his lover return to Konoha would be an understatement. No sooner had Kankuro passed through the gates when two familiar figures knocked him to the ground, winding him, and licked his face. “Get a room,” one of the patrol chuunin had jokingly shouted at the two men. Kiba had just laughed and ignored them, and Kankuro had picked himself up and told Kiba that he had to report to Naruto first, and then he would go back to the Inuzuka compound. Kiba's eyes had lit up. Had he had a tail, he would have wagged it.

He had reported to Naruto and Shikaku, the only Jounin Commander on duty – Chouza had gone home as he had clan matters to deal with - exchanged pleasantries about his journey and his sister's pregnancy, and discussed what his duties would be while in Konoha. Shikaku had told him to go and pick up a Konoha jounin's uniform and a forehead protector, as, he reasoned, it would probably be more appropriate for Kankuro to blend in rather than wearing his usual Puppet Squad gear. Kankuro had been fitted out for his uniform and purchased it, and when he returned to the Inuzuka compound, Kiba had burst out laughing, and Shikoku, his brother-in-law, had made some joke about Kankuro customising it and it had all been in good faith. Kankuro himself couldn't believe he was wearing the dark blue and olive green of Konoha, rather than his usual black or the brown and khaki of Suna, not to mention his forehead protector had that weird leaf symbol rather than the hourglass to which he was accustomed.

The sex had been amazing, albeit not as frantic as Kiba would have liked, because Kankuro was knackered and not feeling up to being penetrated or penetrating, so they settled for frot instead. Kankuro didn't care; he was merely glad to be holding that strong, lithe body in his arms again, to be breathing in Kiba's scent and running his hands through his hair and feeling the warmth of another body against his, another cock pressing against his. It had been so long, and he'd been getting sick of relying on his hand or his puppets for pleasure. They slept in Kiba's bed; it was a bit of a squeeze, _but,_ Kankuro thought, _we're ninja. We've both slept in worse conditions, and at least it's warm in here._

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kankuro stood in the Hokage's room, shifting from one foot to the other. Naruto played with a paperclip, whle Iruka and Chouza briefed Kankuro on his upcoming work at the Academy.

“You're going to be shadowing a couple of jounin,” explained Iruka. “One teaches the younger kids, and also the ones with behavioural problems, and another one specialises in weapons usage. In fact, I think you've probably met them.”

Chouza, who was standing by the door, noticed footsteps, and recognised the sound almost instantly. “As a matter of fact, Kankuro,” he said, “they're here now.” He grinned. “I don't think you're going to need to get acquainted with them.”

There came a knock on the door, and a woman's voice calling, “Sir Naruto? We're here about the Academy.” Kankuro noticed that she had a faint accent that he recognised, back from the time he and his siblings had entered the Konoha Chuunin Exams, to be from Tanokuni, or Otonokuni as it had become. That girl with the bells who had fought his brother-in-law had had the same accent. _Good gods,_ he thought, _please don't let it be some former agent of Orochimaru...oh, what am I thinking? Naruto isn't that thick._

“Come in,” shouted Naruto, and Kankuro had to force himself not to let his jaw drop, as he recognised the two jounin he would be working with.

“Chouji?” he exclaimed. “Tenten?”

“That's right,” confirmed Iruka. “You'll be shadowing these two. They'll show you the ropes and you'll be sitting in on their classes.”

“You'll be with me tomorrow,” said Chouji. He smiled lopsidedly. “Don't worry, I'll make sure the little...erm... _darlings_ don't give you a hard time.”

“He will, you know,” laughed Tenten.

 _Bollocks_ , thought Kankuro. _They'll walk all over him._ He didn't dare say so in the presence of Chouji, his father and the Hokage. Instead he said, “Great. I'm looking forward to it.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kankuro sat opposite the door in the classroom where Chouji was due to be teaching. Although he did not have his facepaint on and was wearing a Konoha uniform and headband, some of the kids stared at him. They were talking amongst themselves, but he decided not to tell them to be quiet. After all, he was only an observer.

Then the door opened and Chouji walked in, his hair in a braid, and immediately the class stood up and were silent. Kankuro's jaw almost dropped.

“Good morning,” said Chouji pleasantly. “Please be seated.” Without a word, the kids sat down. “This here is Kankuro Sabakuno from Sunagakure,” Chouji said, indicating towards Kankuro. “He's one of the leading Puppet Squad members, and he's going to be sitting in on classes. As you're all aware, Sunagakure are our allies, and the Kazekage is interested in our teaching methods. Hopefully, Kankuro will have plenty of knowledge to share with the Kazekage when he gets back. Feel free to ask him anything, as long as it's not too personal, and remember. You're all to treat him with the same respect you treat your own Konoha teacher. Understood?”

“Yes, sensei,” the class said as one.

Kankuro stood up, bowed, and said, “Pleased to meet you all.” He sat down and waited for the inevitable whispered comment, but no, the students remained on their best behaviour.

Kankuro wondered how the hell the little bastards were so quiet. Surely Chouji was a pushover? But no, there he was, drawing a basic diagram of a human body on the blackboard and telling his students about human weak points, and he really seemed to know his stuff. He wasn't even chewing gum, for fuck's sake. “So,” he was saying, “an enemy attacks you and you need to get him where it really hurts. Say you're going for the face. Where should you aim?” A small blond boy raised his hand. “Yes, Atsushi?”

“Eyes, Sensei,” said Atsushi.

Chouji nodded. “Yes, the eyes. Very good place to aim for, because obviously if your enemy can't see you, you have an advantage right there. What are some of the ways in which you could blind an enemy? Any ideas?”

Various children put their hands up.

“Stab them with a kunai. Or gouge them out.”

“Stick your fingers in them,” suggested one child, holding up two fingers for emphasis.

“Smash their glasses and rub the glass in?”

“Use poison or a smoke bomb?”

“If the smoke bomb has any kind of poison, so much the better,” Chouji said, as he rapidly wrote down the kids' suggestions on the blackboard, and drew an arrow to the diagram's eyes. “So you can obscure your enemy's vision, and choke him while you're at it. Right. Any more suggestions?” The room went silent. “Don't all rush at once,” he said sarcastically. “Come on, there's a really obvious one. I'll give you a clue. It's a bit lower down.”

Eventually one girl said, “Throat?” Chouji nodded, and drew an arrow to the throat. Kankuro began to daydream about his old days in the Suna academy, and was brought back into the room when he heard Chouji mention his name. The kids bombarded him with questions about Suna and he did his best to answer them until Chouji eventually stepped in and said, “OK, enough. You'll have plenty of time in future to ask Kankuro-sensei about his village. Class dismissed!”

There then followed an outdoor training session with Tenten, where she directed young genin to throw cardboard shuriken at a target, making the odd sarcastic comment about a kid's ability to throw, and helping them to position their small bodies in the correct stance. There then followed lunch, then another session with Chouji and a slightly older class – who seemed as in awe of him as the other lot had been - then his first session of marking. Chouji had given him a copy of the assessment criteria and told him that he and Tenten would be meeting up for drinks after work and Kankuro was more than welcome to come along. He went to one of the free classrooms, and found his brother-in-law sitting there, scratching his head and frowning over a pile of history essays.

“So,” said Shikamaru, looking up, “how was your day?”

“Oh, not bad, not bad,” replied Kankuro nonchalantly, before a sudden realisation struck him. “What _is_ it with your team mate?”

“Which one?” asked Shikamaru. “I have two.”

“Chouji,” replied Kankuro. “I don't get it. I thought he'd be a pushover and the little ba-erm, darlings would be walking all over him 'cos he's so nice. But he walks in, they shut up. I don't know how he...hey, what are you grinning at me like that for?”

Shikamaru burst out laughing and banged his hands on the desk. “Oh, Kankuro. You really believe _Chouji Akimichi_ is a pushover? Good gods, that's absolutely hilarious. I can't wait to see Chouza's face when I tell him you said that.”

“Share the bloody joke,” Kankuro growled. He couldn't remember the last time he'd seen his brother-in-law laughing so much.

“Chouji,” said Shikamaru, only slightly regaining control of himself, “killed an Akatsuki single-handedly and helped take another down. His reputation precedes him. It stands to reason that some of the kids are terrified of him, don't you think?”

“Fuck off.”

Shikamaru shook his head, incredulous. “Come on, Kankuro, if anyone knows Chouji, it's me. So believe me when I tell you that any kid stupid enough to push Chouji too far learns very quickly not to do that. _Very_ quickly. Oh, it's not like he'll punish them for any little thing. The kids do like him. But they know to stay on his good side. For their own sakes.” He smiled conspiratorially at Kankuro. “It's the quiet ones and the nice ones you have to watch out for, you know.”

“You're telling me,” said Kankuro, scratching his head. “You've met my brother.”

“I'm glad things are going well for you, anyway,” said Shikamaru. “I'm sorry I can't come out with you later. Aunt Motoko needs help with the deer and Dad's briefing a squad for a mission, and Aunt Tomo's on duty tonight, so. Chouji and Tenten won't mind.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

“Hi,” Kankuro said to one of the medic-nin on reception at Konoha Hospital, shielding his eyes at the harsh glare of the fluorescent lights, “could you tell me where the maternity ward is, please? I'm Kankuro Sabakuno.” He held up his teacher's ID card. “My sister's in there. Temari Nara.”

“Top floor,” replied the medic-nin. “Turn right and go up the stairs, and once you get to the top of the stairs, follow the signs.”

“Any idea how she is? Is it out yet?”

The medic-nin checked the notes on her desk and said, “Yes. Baby was born about an hour and a half ago. No complications. She's only allowed to see family at the moment, so obviously you're OK to go up there.” She smiled. “I'll let you find out the rest yourself.”

“Thanks,” said Kankuro, bowing, and he walked down the corridor in front of him, took a right turn and followed the medic-nin's directions. It was all he could do not to run up there at full speed. His mind was overflowing with questions. Was it a boy or a girl? Did it look like Shikamaru? Like Temari? Like Gaara or even Kankuro himself? Was Shikamaru there? Would he be allowed to hold it? How was Temari? Would Taki be jealous? Would he warm to the child? Of course you will, Kankuro chided himself. _It's your flesh and blood._

Konoha Hospital was far bigger than Sunagakure's hospital, and Kankuro was grateful for the signage. It had been a long time since he had last been to the hospital, let alone the maternity ward. Why, he thought, must there be so many bloody corridors? Do they do this on purpose?

He was nearing another corner when he heard what seemed to be a male voice singing. Intrigued, Kankuro stopped in his tracks and listened. Whoever the singer was, his voice was, thankfully, pleasing on the ear. It was deepish, in the lower end of the tenor register – Kankuro knew some basics about music, being a keen singer himself – and sounded oddly familiar. As the singer came closer, Kankuro could discern words:

_We're bringing out our chopsticks_

_And we're sharpening our knives_

_We'll feast upon the battle's spoils_

_With our husbands, kids and wives_

_We're the motherfucking Akimichi motherfucking clan_

_Fighting, eating, fucking_

_No-one does it like we can..._

Kankuro snorted with laughter. He'd heard that song before.

Seconds later, Chouji walked round the corner, cradling a fat baby in his arms. He stopped singing and said, “Oh, hello.”

Kankuro looked down at the baby. It was one of the biggest babies he had ever seen, and it appeared to be sucking its thumb.

“My daughter,” said Chouji unnecessarily. He smiled warmly. “Isn't she beautiful?”

Kankuro wasn't sure that 'beautiful' was the right word to describe the baby, but he nodded. The baby woke up and began to cry. He winced at the sound.

“Ah, she wants feeding,” Chouji said calmly. “Come on, let's get you back.” Kankuro followed him into the maternity ward, where Temari, Yumi Akimichi, and a few other women were lying in a row of beds, some with babies, some without. Yumi looked drained, and was surrounded by a group of Akimichi women, one of whom was her mother-in-law, while Temari was holding her own tiny baby in her arms. She looked almost as drained as Yumi, and her face was sweaty and her hair plastered to her forehead, but Kankuro could not remember the last time he had seen her look so happy. Shikamaru was sitting in a chair by her bedside, and Kankuro could see that his face was tearstained.

One of the Akimichi women was undoing her jacket and saying, “It's OK, love, you're tired. I'll do it for you.” She yanked down her bra, revealing an immense breast, and said to Chouji, “Pass her over.” Chouji gently laid the screaming baby in the woman's arms, and immediately she latched onto the woman's nipple and began to feed.

“Ach, cheers,” said Yumi. “Ah've fed her all Ah can, but she's affy hungry.”

“Chouji was like that when he was a baby,” Megumi reminisced. “He just would not stop feeding. I've got some ointment that will help you if your nipples are hurting, I know mine did when...”

“ _Mum_ ,” groaned Chouji. His face was rapidly turning the same colour as his jacket. “ _Stop it_.”

Shikamaru was watching and smiling. Kankuro went over to the couple and said, “Well, congratulations. How did it go?”

“Well,” said Temari with a shrug, “I've been through worse pain. It helped having Shikamaru here, though.”

“How are Dad and Taki?” asked Shikamaru.

“They were playing shougi, and then they both fell asleep,” Kankuro replied, and Shikamaru laughed. “Just like Dad. They should be along later. Mum was here earlier to check on Temari, and she said she's going back to make tea and then bring Dad and Taki here.”

“Can I hold...” Kankuro began to ask, and broke off when he didn't realise the sex of the baby.

“Him,” Temari finished for her brother. “It's a boy.” She turned to her husband. “Just like you always wanted, eh? A girl, and then a boy.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Tenten, Chouji and Kankuro were sitting in one of the bars in Konoha, drinking pints. Chouji was chewing an entire pack's worth of gum, Kankuro was trying to decide whether he preferred the beer in Konoha to the beer in Suna, and Tenten was updating Chouji on Lee's condition.

“I saw him yesterday,” she was saying, “and he's a lot better. 'Course, they're having to keep reminding him that he's not ready to be discharged yet and that he's not to run off and train, or he'll make himself ill again. Shizune says Neji told her Lee's chakra flow was shot to hell. They had to put him in intensive, there was so little of it left.”

Kankuro stared. “What happened to Lee?” he asked. “Did he get ambushed or something?”

“Overtraining,” said Tenten grimly. “Every second he's not on missions, he's training. He's not been right in the head since Gai-sensei died, but then a couple of weeks ago, he decided to work on opening the gates and the stupid git went up to the seventh gate and it used up nearly all his chakra. And then Neji got worried 'cos he was due to meet up with Lee for sparring, so he and Hiashi-sama went out to look for him 'cos Neji thought he'd need an extra Byakugan, and both of them were with Sir Naruto at the time, and they found him and he was lying under a tree...shit, sorry, Chouji.” For Chouji had pressed his hand to his temple and looked as though he were about to cry, but instead, he just shut his eyes and exhaled heavily.

“So that explains what Dad and Hiashi were on about when I went in for debriefing,” he said.

“Kiba says Hiashi's an arsehole,” Kankuro said without thinking. “And that he wishes he was more like your dad.”

Chouji lowered his eyes. “Yeah,” he said, “but Hiashi didn't have a fucking breakdown and end up in hospital for a week because he couldn't drag his arse out of bed and kept crying and having panic attacks.”

Kankuro was aghast. “I'm sorry,” he said after an awkward pause. “I didn't realise.”

“That's OK,” said Chouji. He twisted a stray strand of hair around his finger. “Dad and Hiashi have a lot in common, you know. Not that either of them would admit it, but they do. They're both proud, they're both stubborn, they both hate admitting they're wrong. And they're both fuck-ups.”

 _What happened to make him so talkative?_ Kankuro thought. In the few times he'd met Chouji before and in the few weeks after the war, he'd never really said that much, and not just because he was always shoving food in his mouth. Kankuro wondered if the very real risk of death had somehow caused Chouji to open up. Then again, Shikamaru had always said that the Akimichi were more emotional than the other noble clans. “Probably that's why we get on with them,” he had theorised. “I mean, gods, you saw Dad at our wedding. A seasoned old jounin, but then I get married or Temari has a kid or a fawn gets injured and he has to put it down, and he could flood Suna. And then Chouji gets married and Dad's having to comfort Chouza.” He snorted. “Ah, they're terrible, our parents. Shouldn't be allowed out.”

“Aren't _all_ shinobi fuck-ups?” Tenten said wryly. “Have you ever met one who isn't a fuck-up? And who _isn't_ Shikamaru, Chouji, before you say anything.”

“I've heard a lot about Hiashi from Kiba,” Kankuro said. “I know he doesn't approve of us. And apparently he was cruel to Hinata.”

“That's Hyuuga-sama for you,” said Tenten with a shrug. “They've always been conservative. Although Neji's always been fine with me, but then he's Branch, so I guess he knows what it's like to be an outcast.” Kankuro lowered his eyes. He knew Tenten had recently come out to her parents. They were still recovering from the shock, and the atmosphere in the house had become so bad that she had moved in with Lee.

Kankuro heard a soft popping sound, and saw Chouji peeling gum off his nose.

“When I look at Hiashi,” he eventually said, “I don't see a monster. I see a very sad man. Neji's dad died years ago, didn't he? Hiashi's probably never got over it. You don't get over something like that, losing a sibling. Not that I'd know how it feels, but Shikamaru's the closest thing I have to a brother, and if he died, it would rip me into pieces. And Hiashi does love Hinata, you know. He's just crap at showing it. He's not emotional like Dad and Shikaku-sama are, he bottles everything up. From what I know of him, there's so much he wants to say, but he can't, because he's...well, a _Hyuuga_ , I guess. They're the noblest of the nobility, I guess they have to set the standard for the rest of us, or something.”

“That's pretty much what Neji thinks,” said Tenten. “You Akimichi aren't as messed-up as the Hyuuga are, but then that's eye clans for you.”

Chouji smiled sadly. “The Hyuuga have always looked down on the Akimichi. Them and the Uchiha pretty much accepted the Aburame, even if they weren't an eye clan, but they've always thought of us as common and vulgar and too loud and we eat too much and fuck knows what else. They looked down on us way more than the other clans. Called us the 'cracked pillar'. But, hey, at least we Akimichi look after each other. And we aren't up our own arses.”

“And you give bloody great parties,” said Tenten. “I had to carry Lee home from the last one.”

“Being nobility's not all it's cracked up to be,” Kankuro laughed. “Although I think I can live with being known as 'the Kazekage's brother'. Better that than 'the Jinchuriki freak's brother'.” To his relief, the other two shinobi were smiling.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

“Akamaru!” exclaimed Lee, as Kiba, a satchel slung over his shoulder, and his dog walked into the hospital room. “Good to see you, old boy! I did not think they would be letting dogs in here.”

“I sneaked him in,” Kiba said with a smile. “The old clone trick.” He opened his satchel and brought out a magazine. “It's from Tenten, she knew you'd want to be up to speed with _Aurora_ and _The Magical Adventures Of Benji_ or whatever it's called. The one with all the fighting and stuff.”

“That was awfully good of her,” said Lee. He grinned. “She has been here quite a lot recently. And not just to see me.”

“Did she turn someone into a walking pincushion or something?” Kiba snorted.

“I should jolly well hope not,” said Lee indignantly. “She's a dashed good markswoman.” His gaze darted around the room. “I will be out of here soon, they say. And not before time. I should be back on duty by the end of the month, if things go to plan, but Shikaku-sama and Chouza-sama are awfully concerned about sending me out on missions.”

“Oh, Lee,” groaned Kiba, “you're not going to push yourself too far again, are you?”

They talked for a while until Kiba heard footsteps. Instinctively, he pushed open the window and Akamaru bounded out. Seconds later, Shizune walked in.

“Hi, Kiba,” she said. “How's Kankuro?”

“He's fine,” replied Kiba. “I think he's gone down the pub with Chouji and that lot. He might need some help with poisons, he said.”

“Just tell him to talk to me or Sakura,” said Shizune, “and we can sort something out. Sorry to do this to you, but Lee needs to rest up.”

“No probs,” said Kiba. “See ya.” He climbed out the window.

“I hope he didn't wear you out too much,” said Shizune, but Lee shook his head. “Gods, no. I do not think anything could wear me out right now.”

“Well, make sure you get some sleep,” said the medic-nin, closing the curtains. “You'll be out in about three weeks' time, as long as you don't push yourself. I mean it, Lee. No sneaking off to train for hours on end.”

As Lee settled down, Shizune went back to her office. She was sifting through a pile of paperwork when a knock came on the door and a familiar voice called out, “Shizune? You in there?”

Shizune went to open the door, and let her visitor in, saying, “You're a bit later than usual.”

“Work commitments,” said Tenten. She locked the door, and immediately, Shizune began to undo Tenten's jacket. She slipped it off Tenten's shoulders, and was about to unhook her bra when Tenten brushed her off and said, “Hold on, I need to get these things off.” She sat on the edge of the bed and took off her shoes, and then swung her legs onto the bed and pulled off her vest top, eased her trousers and knickers down, casually flinging them in the direction of one of the black leather chairs, and lay smiling up at Shizune, her legs wide open.

Shizune bent over and unhooked Tenten's bra, and cupped her breasts in her hands.

“The doctor,” she whispered in Tenten's ear, “is _in_.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Back in the present day, the Kazekage's brother looked down at his little nephew and wondered what his name would be.

“So,” said Kankuro, “you thought of a name for him yet?”

“Only insofar as it's got 'Shika' in it,” said Temari. “Shikamaru-kun, you had any ideas yet?”

Shikamaru began to rattle off a list of names. “Shika, Shikasuke, Shikahei, Shikajiro, Shikataro, Shikano, Shikaji, Shikaza, Shikachi, Shikane, Shikato, Shikaro, Shikaki, Shikaya.” He scratched his head. “Those are the main possibilities, I believe.”

“Shikane,” Temari said thoughtfully. “I like that. It has a nice ring to it.” She glanced over at Yumi and Chouji. “You two thought of a name for your little Chou yet?”

“We're kinda stuck between 'Chouhi' an' 'Chouhana',” said Yumi. “We were thinkin' o' callin' her Chouko, but there's anither Akimichi girl wi' the same name, so it could get affy confusin'.”

“Actually,” Chouji broke in, “I've got an idea. How about Chouyomi?”

“What the fuck kind of name is _that_ for a girl?” demanded Kankuro, shocked. “You're naming her after the depths of Hell!”

“Kankuro's right, Chouji,” Shikamaru concurred. “Couldn't you call her something a bit more...pretty?”

Chouji snorted. “Don't be so ridiculous. I think her facial markings are starting to show already – normally they don't appear for a while – and it looks like she's going to have the same ones as Momo and Dad. And in our clan, those facial markings mean you're pretty fierce, plus, I have a feeling she's going to grow up to be a _hell_ of a shinobi. I just do.”

“I see what you did there,” said Shikamaru. He smiled. “Well, Chouji, I guess you have your reasons. And she's got red hair, so she could be the second version of her grandfather. Quite a fierce kunoichi in the making, if that's the case.” Kankuro, however, was more incredulous. “Chouji,” he said, “she's a baby.”

“ _Derrrrrr_ ,” said Chouji sarcastically.

Kankuro slapped his forehead. “I meant, smartarse, that it's a bit of a dark name to give to a baby. Hell, why don't you call her Chou-Oni or something while you're at it?”

Chouji was beginning to get visibly irritated. “She's _my_ daughter, Kankuro, and I trust my instincts,” he snapped. “Yumi, you're her mum, what do you think?”

“Ah like it,” said Yumi. “At least it's original. An' it'll pit off onny bullies.” She laughed, and Temari joined in. “Shikamaru's right, she _is_ gonnae be the second comin' of Chouza.”

“So that's settled then,” said Shikamaru. “Chouyomi Akimichi and Shikane Nara. Now all we need is our little Ino.”

Three months later, Ino Yamanaka's waters broke in the middle of the Interrogation headquarters, and Sai, who was with her at the time, brought her to Konoha Hospital on one of his ink birds. Within a few hours, under Sakura's watchful eye, she had given birth to a tiny, milky-white baby boy with pale blond hair. Inosuke Yamanaka had arrived, and although they would not know it for some years, the new InoShikaChou trio had been formed.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months. The nights grew shorter, bare-branched trees that resembled tangled shadows began to sprout leaves again, and flowers emerged from the earth. The air grew warm, then hazy and close – though nowhere near the relentless heat that Kankuro was used to – then cool again. Leaves turned red and orange and crunched beneath the feet of the citizens. Lee was back on duty now, and was talking about adopting a child. Shinobi came and went, some returning unscathed, some needing a quick trip to or a long stay in Konoha Hospital, some bearing the sad news of their colleagues' deaths. Shikaku and his twin sisters watched their deer nurse their fawns. Jiraiya played with Taki while their parents discussed tactics and missions; Hiroshi Hyuuga was learning to walk, and Hiashi held his tiny hand as he took one faltering little step after another; wavy purple lines became visible on Chouyomi's face, running from under her lower eyelids to her jawbone, and the Akimichi women continued to take turns nursing her. Hana Inuzuka fell pregnant for the third time.

For Kankuro, life in Konoha seemed easier than he had originally thought, but always, at the back of his mind, there was the nagging doubt that this could not last forever. He missed Gaara, his old students, Matsuri, the Puppet Squad, Baki and his family, the Academy genin, the Harumichi clan and their banter when he went to their compound to discuss poisons. It wasn't just the people he missed, either; he missed his bedroom and his old workshop, the adobe buildings of Suna, the long clear nights where you could see miles and miles of stars, the Shrine of the Lucky Gods, the hookah bars where civvies and off-duty shinobi would sit and inhale fruity tobacco, the smell of roasting meat and exotic fruit and spices from the street stalls, the bars where the Puppet Squad would hang out and sometimes raise hell, the sound of vendors calling to each other and people talking and laughing and arguing, the Suna accent itself. Temari had not lost hers, but what if she woke up one day and started saying 'barth' instead of 'bath' like Shikamaru did?

He really did love Konoha. It was cooler than Suna, and the people might have seemed more restrained than the people of Suna (although most of the Akimichi and Inuzuka would have fitted right in), and Ichiraku's did do some killer ramen, and as much as he hated kids, he did enjoy supervising training sessions at the Academy and lecturing on puppet techniques, not to mention hanging out with Chouji and Tenten and Lee and Shikamaru and all the rest of them. He was used to wearing the outfit and forehead protector of a Konoha shinobi. Green did suit him, after all. He got on well enough with the Elders; hell, he'd even had dinner with the Akimichi head family a couple of times, and Chouza and Megumi had made him feel right at home, and Yumi had raved about what a laugh Temari was and plied him with questions about Suna. And the Nara had been great. He'd met more clan members, and although they'd taken the piss out of him a bit, they certainly hadn't told him to fuck off back to his own country like some of the other shinobi had. Not everyone had gotten over the Orochimaru incident, after all. Kankuro didn't care. The opinions of a few random ninja didn't matter to him.

But Kiba's opinion did, and Kankuro was torn. One day, he would have to go back, and then they would be back to writing letters and waiting for leave. _We cannot go on like this,_ Kankuro thought. _Something's got to give._

What he was really scared of admitting, even to Kiba, was that he was afraid something would happen to Gaara. Sasori and the androgynous blond man who'd accompanied him were long dead, but Kankuro knew that there would be others like them, and besides, there were always going to be people in Suna, whether he liked it or not, who saw his little brother as nothing but a monster. Gaara had Baki, the Takano, the Harumichi, most of the village and several elders on his side, but no-one - not even Baki, the closest thing Kankuro had ever had to a father - knew him like Kankuro did, and Kankuro had always regretted not being able to save him from Akatsuki.

He and Shikaku and Chouza had once joked about being older brothers, and how the gods had created younger siblings with the sole intention of pissing the older kids off, but the two older men had grown serious. “Tomoko and Motoko,” Shikaku had said, “are troublesome women, don't get me wrong, and they're a right pair of wind-up merchants, but even though we're all adults with kids of our own, I'm always going to want to protect them. Even though they'd end up protecting _me_ , more likely.”

“Same with Zaku,” Chouza agreed. “She'll always be my little sister. I'm fifty years old, she's forty-four, and she still calls me ' _nii-san_ '. I'm surprised she doesn't ask me to carry her on my back anymore. But if anyone hurt her, just like if anyone hurt Chouji or Megu, I'd tear them to pieces with my bare fucking hands. I'd rip out their throat with my teeth.”

Kankuro wondered if he should mention Gaara. _Fuck it,_ he thought, _they'll know anyway, since Tsunade got the message back then_. “If I'm honest, I'm the same about Gaara,” he offered. “He's well stronger than me, he's the Kazekage, but I'll always look out for him. I'd say that I'll kill anyone who harmed him, but...well...I didn't do a very...”

Shikaku cut him off. “The past is past, Kankuro,” he said sternly. “Gaara is alive and well. Your sister certainly doesn't hate you for it. She's talked about it a few times, what happened, and at the end of the day she was just bloody glad that Sakura-sama managed to save you. And Chouza, don't you start either,” he added, as he heard his team mate inhale. “You don't want to go back into hospital, do you?”

“Gods, Shikaku, you sound like my wife,” Chouza said testily. “Don't worry, I'm not going to start crying on you or anything.” Kankuro thought of Lee, and what Kiba had said about him after he'd seen him in hospital.

“It is true, though,” the Akimichi clan head continued. “No matter how old you are, no matter if they're stronger than you, if you have a younger brother or sister, you're always going to want to protect them.”

“Maybe that's why the gods created older brothers,” pondered Shikaku. “To protect their siblings.”

“Don't forget older sisters,” laughed Kankuro, and Shikaku grinned. “How could I?”

 _Gaara, Kiba, Temari,_ Kankuro thought, now back in the present. _The three people I love most in the world. And one of them might hate me soon._

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Trudging back to the Inuzuka compound in the dark after a long discussion with Naruto, Neji, Shikamaru and Shikaku about the possibility of collaborating with Suna shinobi on an escort assignment, Kankuro was greeted by the familiar sight of Akamaru bounding towards him. He let the dog place his paws on his shoulders and lick his face, and tickled his ears, knowing full well that he was stalling for time. With a heavy heart, he stopped petting the dog and allowed him to lead him into the house. Kiba greeted him as usual. He did not kiss Kankuro, as Tsume was in the room – as were Shikoku, Hana and the boys – and he did not want to make her uncomfortable, but he gave Kankuro a brief hug and ruffled Akamaru's fur.

After the Inuzuka and Kankuro had had dinner, and Shikoku and Hana had put the kids to bed, Kiba took off his shirt and flak jacket and sat on his bed, idly kicking his feet against the various boxes stored under it and waiting for Kankuro to finish in the bathroom. Kankuro came in, brushing stray drops of water off his face, and Kiba asked, “Where were you earlier? I didn't think you'd be back this late.”

“With the Hokage,” Kankuro said. “I had to report to him about a possible joint mission with Suna. He doesn't half go on at times. I swear, him and my brother might be the same age, but sometimes I see Naruto and Jiraiya and I wonder which one of them is the kid.”

“Naruto,” sighed Kiba, “is a decent guy, but he's well naïve at times. And he doesn't always get it right. I think it's 'cos he's not in a clan, so he doesn't know all the clan politics and shit. You know Chouji never forgave him for putting him in a bad position with his clan?”

“Remind me,” said Kankuro, scratching the back of his neck, playing for time. He felt annoyed at Kiba for not questioning him further or being suspicious and rabbiting on about his friends, then felt even more annoyed at himself for expecting such a thing of Kiba, particularly as he probably would have retorted, “What is this, an interrogation?” or something equally inane. Surely the fact that his lover trusted him was a good thing?

“It's a nobility thing,” Kiba explained. “Shino told me about it a while back. The three noble clan heads – so that's his dad, Hinata's dad, and Chouza - have a rule that anyone who betrays the clan will be hunted down and killed. And that includes anyone in the head family. And...well, you read my letter. I think I mentioned Hinata and Chouji worrying about their dads going mental about the...you know. 'Cos their dads would see it as treachery. Hinata's not said anything, she still thinks the sun shines out of Naruto's arse and anyway, she feels she owes him one 'cos he's the reason she's gone back into service, but Chouji...yeah, he's kind of bitter about the fact that Naruto made him choose between him and his family for Sasuke's sake. Him and Shikamaru always hated Sasuke.”

Kankuro grunted. Kiba frowned. “Hey, what's up? You've been in a weird mood all evening. Kids pissing you off or something?”

“It's not the kids, Kiba,” Kankuro said, “although it's...kind of related.”

This was not going to be easy. He noticed that Akamaru's ears had pricked up. Kiba instinctively scratched the big dog's head to calm him.

“What is it, Kankuro?”

“This isn't going to be easy for me,” Kankuro said, “so...just be quiet and let me talk, OK? You can ask me questions when I'm done, but I need to get this over with.”

He began to pace the floor. Kiba looked up at him expectantly. _Just like a dog_ , Kankuro thought.

“It's like this,” he offered. “Don't get me wrong, I like Konoha and I've been having a great time and everyone's been so helpful, and I'm grateful your family put me up, and it's been great seeing Temari and Shikamaru again, and teaching at the Academy was an eye opener, but...it's been a while I've been here now, and I've been wondering how Gaara is...and Baki, and the rest of them. I know there's a lot of, erm, bad blood there and shit but it's been a while now since, since that incident at the Academy, and Gaara did help me get my job back...” _Damn it, Kankuro!_ His mind screamed. _You're always telling people to get to the point, and here you are, rambling on like an idiot! Just tell him!_ But he found himself unable to stop, and continued, “I mean, I'm sure the Academy won't mind, Chouji and Tenten have helped me a lot, they're great, and Chouza and Shikaku would probably get on with our Jounin Commander like a house on fire, I think she knows them, but anyway, look at me going on. The point I'm trying to make is...the point is that...what I'm trying to say is that...”

Tell _him_ , _you stupid fucking twat_. Tell him.

All the while, Kiba was sitting there, looking up at him. Kankuro wished he had a bone to throw him. There was something inquisitive, almost childlike, about his gaze. It was like being stared at by one of the little genin, or Naruto. Kankuro wanted to throw his arms around Kiba's neck and hold him close and tell him everything was going to be alright, somehow, but he held himself back.

He shut his eyes, and stopped pacing. He scratched the back of his neck. He opened his eyes, dug his thumbnails into his palms, looked Kiba in the eye, and blurted out, “It's time for me to go back to Suna. I've been away for so long and I need to go back. I'm sorry, Kiba, but I have to go back. It's my home. Gaara needs me.”

Kiba sat bolt upright, as though a spark had passed into his body and travelled up his spine. His jaw dropped slowly, and his eyes seemed wider than usual. Akamaru was also sitting to attention, his ears erect, his tail thumping the floor.

Kankuro waited for the inevitable outburst, but Kiba merely said something indiscernible.

Kankuro frowned. “Sorry, what?”

“I said,” Kiba repeated, louder this time, “I. Am. Coming. With you.”


	14. Tibetan Mastiff and Shikoku

 Kankuro could not believe what he was hearing, but one look at Kiba's face made him realise that the younger man was deadly serious.

“Kiba,” he said, “do you realise what you're saying? You'll be leaving your family behind, and your team mates, and the rest of your clan, and your mates. You'll be living with me in the desert. You'll have to deal with people giving you shit for being gay. It's a whole new world in Suna, Kiba, it's not like Konoha, and you know it. You're...you're not thinking straight.”

“Of course I'm fucking thinking straight,” Kiba said angrily. “Gods, Kankuro. I thought you'd be happy.”

“It's not that I'm not happy!” Kankuro protested. “It's just...you're too impulsive, Kiba. You say this now, but what if you decide you hate Suna and you want to go back to Konoha? What if it doesn't work out after all?”

“You're saying we don't have a future?”

“No, I am _not_ bloody saying that,” Kankuro said, and realised his voice was getting louder. He tried to speak quietly. “Don't put words in my mouth. I'm saying that you're so impulsive, I'm worried you'll change your mind.”

“I won't, Kankuro,” said Kiba earnestly. “I swear to Inari I won't. I wouldn't be saying this if I didn't believe it.”

“And you know what else?” Kankuro said, a horrible realisation dawning on him.

“What?”

“You're going to have to tell your mum.”

Kiba paled, but then the obstinate look on his face returned. “So?”

Kankuro sighed. “She's not going to like this, and you know it.”

“Kankuro, love,” Kiba said, taking Kankuro's hand in his, “right now, you come first. Mum has Hana and Shikoku and the grandkids. She'll survive.” He looked appealingly at Kankuro. “Please, Kankuro, believe me. I know I want to do this. For you. I love you. I love you more than Konoha.”

Kankuro gave in, and pulled Kiba towards him. The two men clung to each other, trying not to think about the inevitable reactions of certain Konoha shinobi.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

They decided to confront Tsume that evening, and caught her while she was feeding Kuromaru.

“Mum,” Kiba said, “Kankuro and I have something to tell you.”

“This isn't a good time,” Tsume said tersely. “I've got an appointment with Shikaku in half an hour. Recon or something. So make it quick.”

“Maybe we should tell her another time,” Kankuro began, but Kiba interrupted him. “No, we need to get this over with. You said it yourself. Mum, Kankuro's going back to Suna. And I'm going with him.”

“Did you just say what I _think_ you did?” asked Tsume, and Kankuro felt as though his stomach had just circumvented the laws of biology and dropped into his knees.

Kuromaru's ears pricked up. Kiba noticed that he was softly growling. Akamaru's ears, meanwhile, were flat against his head, and he whined. They were very perceptive, the Inuzuka dogs, and knew a bad atmosphere when they felt one.

“What did you think I said, Mum?” asked Kiba, unaware that he had just been given a large amount of rope.

“Something about you going to Suna with Kankuro,” said his mother. “Or did I hear that wrong? I hope I heard that wrong.”

 _Kiba,_ Kankuro thought, _for the love of Benten_ , don't say anything. _Your mum looks like she's about to rip your face off. If the dog doesn't first, that is._

“No, you didn't, Mum,” said Kiba. “I want to move to Suna to live with Kankuro. I've decided. When he goes back, I'm going with him.”

 _Shit,_ thought Kankuro. _Shit. Shit. Shit._ He glanced at Tsume. Right now, her fangs were bared, her nails were digging into her palms, and he could have sworn he heard her growl. She wasn't quite as frightening a prospect as an angry Shikaku – or worse, an angry Chouza – but she came pretty damn close, and she had that big dog with her...

...Before Kiba knew what was happening, Tsume's hand zipped past his face, he felt a searing pain, and something hot and wet slowly trickling down his cheek. Kankuro was next, and Tsume etched an even wider gash upon his face, and for good measure, Kuromaru sank his teeth into Kankuro's calf. Kankuro's face contorted in pain. He forced himself not to scream, for the big wolf-dog had attacked one of his war wounds, and a white hot pain burned through his leg.

“Mum!” Kiba cried. “Why?”

But Tsume said nothing. She turned round abruptly and left, Kuromaru behind her.

Kankuro collapsed to his hands and knees, his leg no longer able to support him, and Kiba buried his head in his hands. The two men were silent, both in shock at Tsume's savagery.

“Bitch,” said Kankuro at last.

“Don't call my mum a bitch,” growled Kiba.

“Why not? She calls herself one,” Kankuro snapped back. “And she didn't have to set her dog on me. Why can't she be happy for us? Fuck sake, we're ninja, we're jounin, we're not kids.”

“I guess it's a shock for her,” said Kiba. “She'll get used to it, right?” He smiled wanly. “Hey, you know any good dog breeders in Suna? Akamaru needs some bitches to mate with. Maybe I can train up some more dogs and have a pack of them like Kakashi did.”

Kankuro did not reply. He sat on the bed, lost in thought. Then he asked, “What about Hana?”

“I'll deal with her,” said Kiba. “You'd better go on and tell your sister, don't you think?”

Kankuro's brow furrowed. Lost in thought, he absent-mindedly scratched his head, and then said, “Yeah, balls to it. I'll tell her and Shikamaru. You talk to Hana.” He kissed Kiba on the forehead. “Good luck, mate. Try not to get mauled.” Kiba could not help but laugh.

While Kankuro limped off to the Nara compound, Kiba went to the part of the Inuzuka compound where Hana, Shikoku, their four children, the Haimaru Sankyodai and Fujiko, Shikoku's dog, lived. He banged on the door, and it opened of its own volition, or so he thought until he noticed a scruffy little blond kid staring up at him. It was Kishu, Hana and Shikoku's oldest son.

“Hello, Kishu,” said Kiba, ruffling his nephew's hair. “Where's your mum?”

“She's feedin' the doggies,” said the child, and pointed towards the kitchen-cum-living room, where Hana was kneeling on the floor, surrounded by the Ashen Triplets. “Sis,” Kiba called, “it's me.”

“Come on in,” Hana called back. Kiba walked out of the dark hallway and into the main room, where the fluorescent light bulb illuminated his bleeding face.

“What in the name of Inari-sama have you done to your face?” exclaimed Hana. “What happened? Is Akamaru acting up?”

“ _Mum_ happened,” said Kiba gloomily, shoving his hands into his pockets. “She's pissed off.”

“Why?”

“I told her we're moving to Suna,” said Kiba. “She didn't like it.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” exclaimed Hana, holding up her hands. “Hold on a minute. You what?” The childrens' ears pricked up, and Kishu and Shouza instinctively flocked to Kiba's side.

“KankuroandmearemovingtoSuna,” mumbled Kiba. “Pleasedon'tscratchme.”

Hana said nothing. She had her hand on the head of one of the grey dogs, and was absent-mindedly scratching him behind the ear. Then she picked herself up, and said, “For how long?”

“Dunno,” said Kiba. He steeled himself. “If you're going to hurt me, go ahead. Just wait 'til the kids are in bed, please?”

Shouza clung to Kiba's leg, and Kishu growled, “Leave Uncle Kiba _alone_.”

“I'm not going to maul you, Kiba,” said Hana. She held out her arms. “Come here.” The Inuzuka siblings hugged each other as the two little boys continued to cling to Kiba's legs. Kiba looked down at Shouza's earnest little face and ruffled his dark brown hair, thinking with a pang about how much he resembled his mother.

“You're not angry?”

“I'll miss you loads, little brother,” Hana said, “but you're not a kid anymore. You've got your own life to lead. And Mum's still got me, and Shikoku, and the babies. Just...remember to stay in touch, yeah?”

Kiba felt a lump rising in his throat. He wanted to cry, but the sight of the kids made him hold his tears back. He bared his fangs, picked Shouza up and tickled him – making the little boy squeal with laughter - and said, “'Course I'll stay in touch. And thanks for not ripping my face off or anything, sis.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Over at the Nara compound, Temari and Shikamaru had taken Kankuro's news surprisingly well. In a way, Kankuro was disappointed; he'd half expected Temari to yell at him and knee him in the balls, and for Shikamaru to give him a stern lecture about letting down one's village, but both of them had seemed happy enough, and congratulated him and Kiba; Shikamaru had commented that Kiba was finally getting out of his 'rookie mindset', Temari had said, “Well, good luck. I'll miss you, but I know you've got the Puppet Squad and everything else to go back to. And Gaara will be happy,” and Shikamaru had then added, “You'll stay in touch, right?”

Kankuro had said that of course he'd stay in touch; child hater though he was, he did make an exception for Shikane and Taki. OK, so Shikane was a pain in the arse when he cried – but weren't all babies? - and Taki was a surprisingly moody child, pushing her greens around her plate until a death glare from Temari had sent her hurriedly scooping mouthfuls of spinach into her mouth, but they were still his blood relatives, the daughter of his sister and Shikamaru, and he could not help but laugh at Taki's similarities to her father and grandfather. An old woman in the body of a small child. She knew how to play shougi, and when he'd come over to see Temari, more than once he had found Shikamaru sitting outside with his daughter in his lap, watching the clouds. Shikane, meanwhile, was Temari's child all over. If his babbling was anything to go by, once he gained the power of proper speech, he was going to be as loud as his mother.

While Shikaku - having come home earlier after being relieved by Hiashi - was bathing his grandchildren and putting them to bed, Temari said to Kankuro, “Come on outside. Shikamaru and me've got something to show you.”

“Oo-er, missus,” said Kankuro mockingly, and Temari rolled her eyes. “So mature, my little brother,” she said to Shikamaru. “Are there any balloons left?”

“I think so,” said Shikamaru. “Let me go check.” He dashed upstairs, and came back a couple of minutes later with a yellow balloon in his hand. Kankuro snorted. “What the bloody hell are you going to do with that? You got some helium knocking around or something?”

“Stop talking bollocks and come outside,” ordered Temari. Kankuro knew it was best to obey his sister when she spoke in that tone of voice, so he followed her, wondering what in the world she and Shikamaru were up to.

In the Nara garden, Temari told the two men to wait until she gave Shikamaru his cue, and stood with her back to them. Kankuro tried to peer over her shoulder, but she brushed him aside with an abrupt “I told you to wait, didn't I?” Sighing, Kankuro stepped back and observed Temari from behind.

She stood, slightly hunched over, her arms bent as though she was clasping something small and precious in her hands. One of her arms appeared to be moving back and forth, as if she were kneading a piece of dough.

It was a spring evening, and the air was warm, and Kankuro tilted his head back and let the breeze blow on his face...hey, wait a minute, he thought. _There's something weird about this wind...where is it coming from? It seems to be coming from all around me..._

The grass around Temari's feet began to rustle in the wind, which was growing stronger and seemed almost visible, as though it were an entity that Kankuro could reach out and grasp in his hand. As if it were a living being with chakra.

Chakra?

Kankuro's glance moved to Shikamaru, who was toying with the balloon in his hand, stretching its neck. He did not seem at all fazed by the fact that his wife seemed to be drawing the winds – for it seemed to Kankuro as though there was more than one wind – towards her and holding them in her hands. Of course, Kankuro knew that his sister had wind chakra, but he'd only ever seen her use it with the aid of her fan.

An inkling of a thought was burrowing into the back of his mind, but he dismissed it.

Temari nodded. Shikamaru nodded back, took a deep breath, and began to blow up the balloon. Kankuro wondered what the hell his brother-in-law was doing, and whether Temari was going to use it for target practice. “Almost there!” Temari, called, and Shikamaru blew until the balloon was at full capacity, tied a knot in its neck, held it out in front of him, and waited – until, without warning, Temari whipped round, her loose hair flying about her face, shouted, “ _Rasengan!_ ” and rammed the small vibrating ball of wind in her hand into the balloon as Shikamaru tossed it at her, ripping it to shreds.

Kankuro slapped himself round the head. He could not believe what he had just seen. “Where,” he managed to say after recovering from his initial surprise, “did you learn to do _that?_ ” He did not need to ask _why_ she had learned a close-range attack. The reason hung in the air, unspoken.

“From the Hokage himself,” said Temari with a triumphant smile. “I want to be able to defend myself in close combat, I have wind chakra, it makes perfect sense. I asked him to train me, and he said he would. He was more than happy to help. It did take a while for me to get to grips with it, but I can do it.”

“I knew you'd be able to pull it off,” said Shikamaru, gazing adoringly at his wife. “Rasengan, Kamatari, the fan...it's a formidable moveset, indeed.”

“But...but...he's the _Hokage_ ,” Kankuro protested. “Why would he help _you_ of all people? And don't look at me like that, you two. You know what I mean. He's a busy man.”

“Oh, like he's going to turn down the sister of his mate the Kazekage,” Temari scoffed. “Anyway, what do you think?”

“You're the same gobby cow you always were,” Kankuro said, but he was smiling now. “Seriously, well done.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kankuro, Tenten and Chouji came as a group from the Academy. Kiba waved to them from the table where he and Hinata were already sitting. Lee was next to arrive, and Ino came shortly after, and Kankuro and Chouji shifted another table to provide extra seating space.

Ino was the first to ask, “What's going on? What have you invited us all here for? And how come you invited Chouji and me, and not Shikamaru?”

 _Someone can't switch off_ , Kankuro thought, unreasonably. Chouji was asking if someone else had died, and he wondered for a second what Chouji was talking about until he remembered the occasion of which they were not allowed to speak, and said, “No, although we came close, ha ha.”

“Do elaborate, old chap,” said Lee, confused. “Has a contract been placed upon your heads?”

“Why would anyone want to kill Kankuro?” Ino asked, and Kankuro replied, “I dunno, 'cos I'm the Kazekage's brother? Anyway, no, it's got nothing to with death.”

Ino folded her arms. “You still haven't answered my question. Why have you invited Chouji and me, and not Shikamaru?”

“And come to think of it,” Tenten chimed in, “where are Shino and Neji?”

“I'm right here,” said a voice. Shino was standing at the edge of the table with a glass in his hand. “I'm sorry I'm late. What's going on?”

“Yes, what is going on?” echoed Lee. The little group began to bombard Kankuro with questions, and Kankuro found himself submerged under a sea of noise, until Chouji decided the atmosphere was too reminiscent of his classroom and roared, “ _Quiet!_ ”

Heads turned, silence fell throughout the bar, and glasses, plates and cutlery were laid down on tables as the other customers stopped whatever they were doing and stared at the group, wondering what was going on. One man muttered, “Bloody ninjas. Think they own the place.” Chouji overheard, and his face turned the same colour as his jacket, but Kankuro smiled gratefully at him.

“It's alright, everyone,” he said loudly, raising his hands in a pacifying gesture. “Don't mind us _bloody ninjas_.” Kiba snorted.

“Right, then,” Chouji said, when it appeared that things had calmed down. “Tell us what this is all about, will you?”

“Kankuro's moving back to Suna,” Kiba explained, “and I'm going with him.”

There was a stunned silence. Then Lee broke it.

“Well,” he said. And again: “Well.”

“Fuck off, Kiba,” said Tenten in disbelief. “That's not funny.”

“Do we look like we're joking?” snapped Kankuro. Kiba, meanwhile, noticed Hinata's eyes were filling with tears, and it was all he could do not to vault over the table and hug her tightly and tell her that everything was going to be alright, that he wouldn't be gone forever.

“But what of Kiba's family?” asked Lee. “Do they object?”

“Mum did,” said Kiba with a shrug. _Understatement of the century,_ Kankuro thought. His face and leg were still smarting. “Hana was cool with it, though.”

“I don't suppose you've told the Sixth yet,” Ino said, and Kankuro shook his head. “We've not really had time.”

“You do realise you're going to have to tell him,” Shino pointed out. “Since you are moving to a foreign country and everything.”

“And possibly changing alliances,” added Lee, to which Kankuro replied irritably, “Are we balls. Konoha and Suna are allies and I don't think my bro-I mean, the _Kazekage_ is going to send Kiba home.”

“I hope not!” enthused Kiba. “I mean, I'm going to be living in a desert, and there'll be wild dogs to hang out with Akamaru...I'm sure Suna could benefit from having another tracker, and maybe I'll get to find a bitch for Akamaru and breed some ninja puppies. An' it'll be sunny all the time, an' I can come home and visit, I mean, it's not like Kankuro doesn't visit his family, and Hana can always come out to Suna if she wants...and I'll be with the man I love.” Ino and Chouji made finger-down-the-throat gestures, but Kankuro knew they were only joking.

“I never realised you were such a fan of hot climes,” said Shino dryly. “You weren't exactly happy that time we went to Yugakure. You kept complaining about how you were, and I quote, ' _sweating your tits off'_.” _I can_ hear _the italics_ , Kankuro thought.

“Oh, come on, mate,” laughed Kiba. “I was a genin then. I've grown up a bit, innit. I'll get used to the heat.”

Kankuro noticed Chouji was looking at him, and when Kankuro returned his gaze, Chouji merely raised an eyebrow and nodded at Kiba, who was – of course, thought Kankuro, rather rudely – totally oblivious. It was at times like these that Kankuro wondered how his lover had become a jounin. As much as he loved Kiba, and admired his incredible nose and tracking skills and innate ability to communicate with dogs, Kankuro had to admit that he was not the brightest candle in the shrine, and sometimes missed things that were going on right under that incredible nose.

He knew, somehow, that Chouji was thinking the exact same thing he was, and as Kiba continued to rabbit on and field questions from Ino and Lee, he knew that both he and Chouji were right. Kiba was overcompensating.

He heard Hinata say, “Well, I can't deny I'll miss you loads, my old team mate. But I want you to be happy. Both of you.” She was smiling, but her smile was strained, and Kankuro wanted to kick himself for feeling so thoroughly ashamed for tearing Kiba and Hinata apart. He knew how close they were, and that Kiba had comforted Hinata after the war and been like a brother to her, cheering her up when she'd been on the receiving end of yet another stern scolding from Hiashi, training alongside her, goofing around at training to make her laugh and Shino roll his eyes behind his ever-present sunglasses. Although Shino was ANBU and Hinata had a family of her own, Kiba still kept in touch with both of them. He and Shino had never been that close, aloof as Shino was, but Hinata...that was another matter. And she was pretty vulnerable still.

 _He's a big boy,_ he told himself. _And she'll get over it, won't she? I mean, it's not like he's_ dying _for fuck's sake._

Now Lee was raising his mug of tea, and proposing a toast. “To Kiba and Kankuro, what!” he cried, holding the mug aloft.

“To Kiba and Kankuro,” echoed the other shinobi.

For the briefest of moments, Kiba's smile faded, and only Kankuro noticed.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Two days later, Kankuro and Kiba were eating dinner with the rest of Kiba's family. Tsume seemed to have forgotten the quarrel of a few nights before, and she was friendly enough, but Kankuro noticed something ever so slightly detached about her manner. Shikoku was away on a mission, so Kiba was helping Hana feed the twins, and he was playing some kind of game with Akita's spoon that involved him pretending it was a hawk. Akita squealed and clapped his tiny hands as Kiba waved the spoon in front of his face. The usually taciturn Kishu was playing with Fujiko, giggling as the big brown dog licked his face, while Hana kept a watchful eye on Shouza, who was trying to work out how he could feed his vegetables to the dogs without anyone noticing.

It was quite unlike any of the restrained, tense mealtimes Kankuro had spent with Gaara and Temari when the three of them were children, and Temari and Kankuro had been on edge, as though they were walking on explosive tags. The slighest glance or noise or throwaway comment could set Gaara off. If Kiba and Akamaru had been eating tea with them, they would have been dead in seconds.

_But Gaara isn't like that now._

“So.” Kankuro broke the silence, when the two of them were upstairs. “You looking forward to leaving?”

Kiba grinned wolfishly, and said, “Hell yeah. I can't wait to go to Suna.”

Kankuro stared at him with an expression of displeasure. “Kiba Inuzuka,” he said, “you are a fucking terrible liar. So don't bother. Any fool can see you're unhappy about leaving Konoha.”

Kiba was shocked. He thought he'd got away with fooling Kankuro.

“I can act with the best of them,” Kankuro said, as if reading his thoughts, “and I can tell an actor when I see one.”

“I want to go to Suna,” was all Kiba would say. “I want to go to Suna.”

“Do you balls.”

“I want to go to Suna.”

“You fucking don't.”

“I do! Honest to Inari-sama, I do! It's just...oh, it's hard to explain, Kankuro. I've lived here all my life. I went to the Academy here, I trained here, I became a genin here, I grew up here. I'll be leaving my mum and my sister and Shikoku and the boys and the dogs and the rest of the clan, and Hinata, and Shino, and Chouji, Lee, Naruto, everyone else. I'll have to adjust to a whole new set of people, a whole new set of customs, 'cause you do stuff a bit differently over there, don't you? Even your food's different. And I'll have to get a totally new uniform and I'll be the only person out there who fights with dogs. And it takes three days to get back to Konoha. And it's so _hot_ in the desert. No trees and all that fucking sand.” He laughed half-heartedly.

Little did Kankuro or Kiba know that Tsume was listening in on their conversation. Hana noticed her mother eavesdropping outside the bedroom door and said quietly, “Mum, leave it.”

All Tsume said in reply was, “Look after the dogs,” and left before Hana could say anything back. Hana was suspicious, and wondered just exactly what her mother was playing at.

Angry though she was, Tsume knew she had to do something to help her son and his lover. She left Kuromaru at home and went to the Hokage's building. She didn't need to ask permission or state her purpose; as head of the Inuzuka clan, she would be allowed in without question. There were a certain two men she needed to speak to before the night was out.

Tsume strode into the Hokage's building, sniffing the air, and wandered the corridors until she picked up a familiar scent. She knocked on the door of one of the admin rooms and called, “Chouza, it's me.”

Shikamaru opened the door. He was in civvies, rather than his normal shinobi uniform, and he was carrying an immense folder. Chouza appeared to be sorting through a stack of papers, and he was chewing on something, as per usual. He looked up and saw his ex-girlfriend standing over him, and said, “Oh, hi, Tsume. How'd you know I was in here?”

“I'd recognise that smell anywhere,” Tsume said. “Don't underestimate my nose. What are you two doing there, anyway?”

Chouza grunted and pointed at the papers on his desk. He hated desk work with a passion, and had never understood why Shikamaru preferred it to missions and combat. Then again, he did have two small children, and the Nara, unlike the Akimichi, had always been good at the administrative side of things.

“Dossier prep,” yawned Shikamaru. “It's another missing-nin from Suna, a renegade Takano woman called Atsutane, and Tenji-sama” - referring to the head of the Takano clan of Sunagakure - “and Gaara had the intel sent to us so we're prepared if they need any backup. Plus Chouza-sama's got some as well from his contacts.” He turned to the older man. “Mind if I knock off now? I'd better go home and check on Shikane.” He took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes, wiped his glasses on his sweater, and put them back on.

“Could you hang on a minute?” Tsume interjected. “I need to talk to you both.”

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow.

“It's about my son.”

“And?” Chouza asked.

“Kankuro.”

“What about them?”

Tsume sat down on the edge of the desk, swinging her legs. This wasn't going to be easy.

“What about them?” Chouza repeated. “I'm a busy man, Tsume, and so is Shikamaru. If you've come in here to waste our time, then leave.”

Tsume was silent.

“I'm waiting.”

“Alright, then,” snapped Tsume, “I'll tell you what I want.” She adjusted her sitting position on Shikamaru's desk, and outlined her proposal. When she had finished speaking, the two men stared at her.

“Well,” said Shikamaru. “Well.”

“Is that all you have to say?” Tsume demanded.

“It's certainly the first time anyone's suggested it,” Shikamaru said, absently stroking his chin. “We'd need to discuss it with the Kazekage, of course. And the Puppet Squad. But it could definitely strengthen ties between us. Temari did a good job when she was Suna's liaison for Konoha, and if we have some kind of dual liaison where Kiba and Kankuro spend half a year here and half a year there, and report back to their respective Kages...what do you think, sir?”

“I think you're bloody mad, Tsume,” came the reply. “And I don't know what Suna are going to think. The Puppet Squad could object, as could the Academy there.” He paused, and inclined his head to one side, toying with his headband. Then he continued, “But Shikamaru has a point. His marriage to Temari's helped to strengthen diplomatic relations, with her as the Kazekage's sister and him as the Hokage's advisor. Kiba has no position here, but Kankuro's pretty highly regarded in Suna, yes? Though I hope to Izanagi-sama that Gaara and Naruto don't fall out and declare war on each other.”

“That will never happen,” said Shikamaru sternly. “Gaara owes Naruto a great debt and speaks very highly of him. And I know Naruto would do anything for Gaara. Temari told me how upset he was when Gaara was murdered by Akatsuki. And he's considered doing some kind of exchange with Suna and Konoha shinobi, so that we can learn from each other and, again, strengthen ties. They scratch our backs and we scratch theirs, so to speak.”

“So is that a yes or no from you two?” Tsume asked. Shikamaru merely nodded, and Chouza said, “A reluctant yes from me, if only because I'm not entirely sure how it's going to work. But, well, good luck to them.”

Shikamaru passed Chouza the folder and said, “Could you put those notes in there, please?”

Chouza took the papers out of the folder, rifled through them and checked Shikamaru's table of contents, until he found the section where the notes were supposed to go, and inserted them.

“Thanks, Chouza-sama” Shikamaru said, his relief audible. “Couldn't have done this without you. Your contacts really came up with the goods this time.”

“You can drop the 'sama', Shikamaru,” Chouza laughed, pushing back his headband. “You've known me long enough.” Shikamaru blushed, and smiled. _He looks so humble and dignified_ , Tsume thought. _The antithesis of my son...but then it takes all sorts to make a world._ She wondered what Kiba and Kankuro were going to think.

As if to make a point as to why Shikamaru should 'drop the sama', Chouza blew a big bubble with the gum in his mouth. He blew until it was as wide as his broad shoulders, and without thinking, Tsume poked her finger into it. “And pop goes your dignity too, Chouza,” said Shikamaru with a wry smile.

“I was practising my _Fuusen Gamu no Jutsu_ earlier,” Chouza explained, very briefly giving Tsume the finger. He peeled the sticky mess off his face, rolled it into a ball, popped it back into his mouth, and continued, “So. What do you want we should do? You want we should go talk to Naruto about this?”

“You've nailed it,” said Tsume. “You're his advisors. Shikamaru, you're his main advisor, as a matter of fact, and his mate, and the son of a Jounin Commander. Chouza, you're the other Jounin Commander. Actually, I think my son once said you reminded Naruto-sama of Jiriaya.”

“What, because I have red hair?”

Tsume laughed through her nose. “Not _that_ Jiraiya, you big galoot. The other Jiraiya. The one who wrote those porno books you read.”

“Little Jiraiya's hair is more pink, anyway,” said Shikamaru pedantically.

Chouza grimaced. “Your point, Tsume?”

“My point is that Naruto will listen to you two. Especially if you play the Gaara angle. I came to you because one, you're more approachable than Shibi or the Hyuuga, and two, you have a connection with Kiba and Kankuro. Shikamaru, they're both friends of yours, and Kankuro is your brother-in-law. Chouza, your son and Kankuro have been working together at the Academy, and as I understand it, they're good friends, am I right?”

“Indeed.” Tsume could barely see the Akimichi clan head's eyes; they were narrowed so much they looked like knife cuts. He was clearly thinking very hard.

“And before either of you ask,” Tsume added, “I know Hinata is Kiba's team mate and they're extremely close, but I didn't want to ask Hiashi because he's not exactly keen on the idea of two men being in love.”

 _You can say that again,_ thought Chouza. Shikamaru said, “Alright, we'll all go and talk to Naruto. You tell him what you've told us, and me and Chouza will back you up. But I really can't stay for long.”

“Don't worry about Shikane,” Chouza reassured him. “If Temari's tired, then your dad'll look after him. I know you're anxious, but he's in good hands.”

Shikamaru opened the door, and Chouza heaved himself up. “Right then,” said Shikamaru briskly. “To the Hokage.”

“This is going to be a piece of piss,” Tsume muttered in Chouza's ear.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Elsewhere in the Hokage's building, Sakura had come back from hospital duty and was looking over some notes she had received from Shizune when she heard a knock on her door, and Neji calling, “Lady Sakura, are you in there? I've got someone here to see you.”

Sakura got up, relieved to have an excuse to get a break from her paperwork, and opened the door to find that the 'someone' Neji was referring to was Hinata. Almost instantly, Sakura realised something was wrong. Hinata was smiling, but her expression seemed forced, and she looked pale and washed out, although Sakura put it down to the kids keeping her busy.

“I'll leave you two to it,” said Neji, and sped off to the roof of the building, where he was due to join his uncle on sentry duty.

“Come on in,” Sakura said. “How's it going? I've not seen much of you lately.”

“Hiyori and Hiroshi,” Hinata offered by way of explanation. She twirled a strand of her long black hair around her finger. “Where's Jiraiya?”

“He's over at the Nara place,” said Sakura. “Shikaku and Yoshino offered to babysit so I could get on with my stuff. ” She smiled. Hinata smiled weakly back.

“Come into the bedroom,” Sakura said, gesturing towards the bedroom door. “Come and sit down. We need to catch up.”

The two women went into the bedroom and sat on the bed, and without warning, Hinata covered her face with her hands and broke down in a frenzy of violent sobbing. Her shoulders shook, she twisted stray strands of hair in her fingers, and tears streamed down her face, plopping onto her knees. Aghast, Sakura drew Hinata towards her and stroked her back, saying, “Hey, what's wrong? What happened?”

Hinata buried her head in Sakura's shoulder and continued to cry, as Sakura sat there, feeling stupid and awkward and not knowing what to do. She hoped it was nothing to do with her and Naruto. After all, Hinata was married, she had her own family. It was a bit too late to be jealous, surely?

Hinata wiped her eyes with the back of her sleeve and said, “Sorry. I don't know what came over me.” She tried to laugh. “All those hormones, I guess. I've been all over the place lately.”

“Anything you want to tell me about?” Sakura asked.

The answer was barely audible.

“Sorry?”

“It's _Kiba_ ,” said Hinata miserably. “He's going back to Suna with Kankuro.”

Sakura stared. “I never realised you two were so close.”

Hinata explained as best she could. Although she liked Shino well enough, it was Kiba who she was really close to. He'd been like an older brother to her, always looking out for her on dangerous missions, letting her cuddle Akamaru when she was upset, consoling her whenever Hiashi had been particularly cruel. He'd been furious at Neji's cruel treatment of her the first time she fought in the Chuunin Exams, declaring that if Naruto didn't get revenge for her, he would, and he had supported her through the Chuunin Exams the second time. OK, so he was a big kid and had a bit of a temper, but he was so kind, he'd always been in her corner, she was the first person he'd told that he was gay, and he'd come to visit her in the hospital when Hiyori and then Hiroshi had been born, and he'd been so kind to her when the post-natal depression set in. Back when they were genin, she'd been embarrassed to talk to him about the situation at home, because it was so painful, it was like reopening a deep wound, but he'd known something was up, he wasn't as stupid as people think he is, and he'd listened, and he'd told her that her dad was an arsehole and she deserved better and why couldn't Mistress Kurenai officially adopt her? And they'd bonded over the birth of little Koutei and they'd all gone out to celebrate with Shikamaru after, and then there was one time when she had come off a shift of the volunteer work she did – along with Zakuro Akimichi, Temari and others – counselling rape survivors, and it had all gotten too much and she'd broken down and wandered around Konoha and bumped into Kiba and he'd been so nice, and oh gods Lady Sakura, why am I telling you this, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you must think I'm a total idiot.

“Don't be silly,” said Sakura gently. “You're not an idiot. Look, I know I'm busy, but if you want to talk about anything in future, you can come here. Bring Hiyori if you want, she and Jiraiya get on well enough. And I think you're very brave, doing the counselling. You're using your own trauma to help others. Be proud of yourself, Hinata. You've come a long way.”

“Do...do you think so?”

“'Course,” affirmed Sakura. “Look at the way you're mentoring those kids, and the counselling, and the fact you're down for promotion – whoops, sorry. Don't tell anyone I told you that, by the way. Anyway, the old Hinata couldn't have done half the stuff you do. And you do such a good job with Hiyori and Hiroshi. Or maybe it's just the inbuilt Hyuuga politeness.”

Hinata reddened, and then tensed. She could hear footsteps.

“Don't worry,” Sakura said. “That sounds like Chouza out there, and I think Shikamaru as well – when you get used to these blokes being around all the time, you get to know whose footstep is whose. They're not coming in here. Chouza might be one of my bodyguards, but he's not going to come barging in uninvited and neither is Shikamaru. They're probably off to see Naruto about something.”

“Let's hope it's not for me,” laughed Hinata. “Gods, this place must be a madhouse. I don't know how you and Jiraiya put up with it. Thanks, Sakura...I mean, Sakura _-sama._ You've been great.”

“Hinata,” said Sakura, “you don't need to be formal with me. I know, I know, you're a Hyuuga. It's in your bones.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Shikamaru, Tsume and Chouza climbed the stairs to the top floor where Naruto's office was based. Shikamaru knew he was in there, as he also had paperwork to catch up on. As Naruto hated paperwork even more than Chouza did, Shikamaru reckoned he would be grateful for the interruption. He knocked on the door and said, “Naruto, it's me, can I come in?”

“Alright,” Naruto bellowed from the other side of the door. “Oh, hi, Tsume,” he said as the three jounin entered the room. “How's the prep going?”

“It's all sorted now,” said Shikamaru. “Chouza and I have compiled the dossier on Atsutane Takano, as requested. Just tell me how many copies you need, and I'll get them done.” He glanced over at Tsume. “By the way, Naruto, if you don't mind, Lady Inuzuka has a request to make of you.”

“Go on,” said Naruto, leaning forward.

“It's like this,” Tsume stated. She paused, then continued, “As you're probably aware, sir, my son is in a relationship with the Kazekage's brother, who's living with us at the moment as he ran into some problems back home.”

“Moreover,” Chouza added, “he's been teaching in the Academy, as – again - I'm sure you're aware, shadowing my s-I mean, Chouji Akimichi and Tenten.”

Shikamaru took up the thread. “He's been imparting some of his own knowledge, as well as taking basic classes – teaching about poisons, traps, and so on and so forth.”

“And received some good reports, so Iruka says,” mused Naruto. “But this isn't about his teaching, is it? There's more to it, right?”

“There is, Naruto-sama,” said Tsume. “Kankuro has decided to return to Suna.”

“Can't say I blame him,” said the Hokage. “He's bound to be keen to see Gaara again, I'm sure.”

“That's not it, though,” Tsume continued doggedly. “My son wishes to go with him.”

Naruto frowned. “He does, does he? For how long?”

“Permanently,” said Shikamaru. “Quite unusual, I know. But Inuzuka-sama has an idea.” He nodded towards Tsume. “I'll let her tell you.”

“Naruto-sama,” Tsume said, “I have a proposal. And the proposal is this: that my son and Kankuro are made shinobi of both villages. Shikamaru, your wife used to be liaison, didn't she?” Shikamaru nodded. “And I was thinking,” Tsume continued breathlessly, “that Kiba and Kankuro could do something like that. Spend, I dunno, half a year in Suna and half a year here, report back and forth, go on any missions that need to be carried out. Kiba could train dogs in Suna, do tracking for them, maybe, Kankuro could maybe teach some of his skills to people here...or he could fight in tandem with taijutsu users. Sakura-sama fought in tandem with a puppeteer once, if I recall, and they had a great arrangement going. Plus, from a political viewpoint, it might help relations between us, having a pair of joint shinobi.”

Naruto's eyes were squeezed shut. To a casual observer, he looked as though he had fallen asleep, but the trio of jounin knew he was thinking hard.

“Of course,” Chouza said, breaking the silence, “you'd have to get the Kazekage's consent. But I can't see it being an issue, given that Suna are our allies. As long as you and Gaara-sama are in charge, I can't see the alliance failing.”

“And while there's an alliance,” Tsume added, “surely the idea of joint nationality or whatever you'd call it for two shinobi is possible? I know I'm asking a lot of you, sir, but I'm not just saying this as a mum, I'm saying this as a clan head and a shinobi of Konoha.”

Naruto's eyes snapped open.

“Alright.”

Tsume stared. “You _wha_...I mean, excuse me?”

“ _Alright_ , I said,” Naruto repeated himself. “That's a good idea what you've got there.” Shikamaru winced at the terrible grammar. “I'll run it by Gaara. I'm sure he won't have no objections. 'Course, we'll have to give it a trial run, and Kiba's gonna be missed round here, but it could work Shikamaru and Temari's marriage apparently went down well over in Suna, love knows no borders and that, so it's definitely worth considering. Yeah. How about they come over in spring and go back in September? I bet Kiba and Kankuro would want to get away from the heat. And Suna's always in need of trackers.”

“I'm ever so grateful, Naruto-sama,” said Tsume, bowing. “Thank you.”

“Hey, no probs,” said Naruto with a grin. “I'm always happy to help Gaara out. By the way, Chouza, old boy,” he added as an afterthought, “you've got something in your hair. Been practising that weird technique again? You Akimichi, eh. You _would_ find a way to work food into your technique.”

Without a word in response, Chouza obediently lowered his head, and allowed Naruto to carefully draw out a strand of bubble gum that had become stuck in his hair.

“Dismissed,” said the Hokage. “And thanks, Tsume. Send Kiba to me tomorrow so I can tell him.”

The three jounin bowed, left Naruto to finish the hated paperwork, and walked back downstairs to the small office. Tsume was jubilant. “See? See?” she crowed. “I told you, Akimichi. Naruto'll do anything for his friend over in Suna.”

“Erm...I don't think you should be saying that, Tsume-sama,” said Shikamaru nervously. Chouza snorted. “Why not? She's only telling the truth, Shikamaru. Not that it's a bad thing, our alliance with Suna. But Naruto-sama does see Gaara as his mate rather than another politician. And if we can exploit that friendship to get our little arrangement going, then great.”

“You old ones,” sighed Shikamaru. “You have no shame.”

“All part of the territory, kid,” said Chouza, patting him on the shoulder. “All part of the territory.”

Tsume sniffed the air. “I recognise that scent,” she said. “There's someone in this building who's going to be very happy to hear the news...and I think she's coming closer right now.” Shikamaru and Chouza did not need to ask Tsume who she was referring to, as Hinata and Sakura came down the staircase. Hinata's eyes were red and swollen, and she looked drained. Tsume poked her head round the door and called, “Hinata? That you?”

Hinata quickened her pace, and stopped when she saw Kiba's mother leaning on the doorframe, her arms folded. “Tsume-sama?” she asked. “Where's Kuromaru?”

“At home,” replied Tsume matter-of-factly. “Also, I've got some news for you. It's not much...just that, oh, you know, your team mate's been granted dual citizenship by the Sixth and will be coming back in the spring to spend half the year in Konoha.”

Hinata's large pale eyes widened, and Sakura patted her on the back and said, “Just what you needed to hear, innit?”

“Thank you, Tsume-sama,” said Hinata breathlessly. “Thank you so much.” The two women hugged each other, while Sakura looked on, relieved that Hinata had been given some consolation, at least.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

“Oi, you three,” bellowed Naruto. “Come in.”

As he followed Kiba and Akamaru into the Hokage's office, Kankuro wondered if there would ever come a day when Gaara would greet fellow shinobi by shouting, “Oi, you” at them. He also wondered why the Hokage had requested an audience with them. Had Gaara been in touch?

He soon got his answer when Naruto told him and Kiba that they had hereby been granted dual nationality, that they were now both shinobi of Sunagakure and Konoha; and that they would be reporting back and forth between villages, spending half a year in each. “Since I thought you'd want to spend your birthday with your family, Kiba,” Naruto explained, “I thought you two could come here in the spring and summer months.”

Kiba sank to his knees and kissed the ground in gratitude, while Akamaru barked joyfully and wagged his huge tail. “I'll be making an offering to Inari-sama tonight,” he said. “If you weren't a married man, Naruto, I'd vault over the table and kiss you.” Sakura gave him a death glare, but he didn't care. It was all Kankuro could do not to pick Kiba up and swing him around, such was his delight in seeing his lover so jubilant, but one of them had to act with dignity, so instead, he bowed deeply.

“Thank you, Naruto-sama,” Kankuro offered. “I...I don't know what to say. Thank you. Thank you so much. I can't tell you how much this means to me.”

“Ah, don't worry about it,” said Naruto dismissively. “And it's Tsume, Old Man Chouza and Shikamaru you should be thanking as well, it was their idea.”

Kankuro, Akamaru and Kiba turned to go, but Naruto held up a hand to stop them. “I'm not finished,” he said. “I've got a request for both of you from Tsume. Kiba, you're to spend the day with Hana and the kids, and Kankuro, you're to speak to the Jounin Commander – the big one - and Shikamaru.”

“I don't think Chouza's going to appreciate you calling him 'the big one',” remarked Sakura. “As for where they are...any minute now...” Kankuro followed her glance to the window, and shortly after, the window glowed orange, and he could just make out what appeared to be a fireball in the sky.

“They're practising their _Katon_ ,” Sakura offered by way of explanation to Kiba, who was gaping and pointing at the window, much to Kankuro's embarassment. She grinned, and turned to Naruto. “I think Shikamaru's winning.”

“Dismissed,” said Naruto. “Have fun.” Kiba and Kankuro bowed, and took their leave.

“When the _fuck_ ,” asked Kiba when he and Kankuro were at the bottom of the stairs, “has _Chouza fucking Akimichi_ of all people been able to do _Katon_?”

“When Naruto-sama started asking everyone to learn elemental techniques, you twonk,” sighed Kankuro. “Which some people haven't started doing yet. Although I admit I haven't done much in the way of earth techniques” - for, having finally taken the chakra element test, Kankuro had discovered that, like his brother, he had an affinity towards the element of Earth - so I can't talk. Now come here.” He held Kiba close, and the younger man buried his face in Kankuro's shoulder, inhaling the familiar scent. Kankuro murmured in his ear, “Wish me luck.”

“Hope you don't get barbecued,” said Kiba, and Kankuro burst out laughing.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

“ _Katon_ _! Goukakyuu no Jutsu!_ ”

“ _Katon! Choukakyuu no Jutsu!_ ”

The sight of two great fireballs, one bigger than the other, greeted Kankuro as he emerged onto the roof of the Hokage building. He heard Shikamaru say, “Phew, that was close. Maybe I should take my glasses off,” and Chouza say, “Yeah, that might be an idea.” Channelling chakra into his feet, he took a giant leap towards where the other two jounin were training.

“Oh, it's you,” said Shikamaru. “Hello.”

“Is that any way to greet your beloved brother-in-law?” Kankuro laughed. He glanced at Chouza, who was leaning against one of the chimneys. _The wandering ronin climbs to the top of the mountain, where lies the king's fortress, to speak with the old master and his companion, the wise young sage,_ Kankuro thought, going into his theatrical mode. _He owes them a great debt, for it is by their machinations that he was able to carry the handsome prince of the tribe of dogs away to his country..._

A huge hand was rapidly moving up and down in front of his face. “Hey. Anyone in there?” Chouza asked.

“Sorry, sir,” said Kankuro. “Miles away.” He cringed inwardly as he felt his face burning up.

“Which one of us have you come to see?”

“Both of you, actually,” said Kankuro. “I guess you know why I've come.” He got down on his knees, assumed the pose of supplication, and continued, “I want to thank you both. You've...you've really helped me and Kiba. I know it was probably hard for you, Chouza, since you probably don't approve, but thank you...”

“Excuse me?” Chouza interrupted. “Are you saying I have some kind of problem with gay people?”

“Yeah,” Kankuro said, undaunted. “Since you're older and...” He broke off when he realised both men were staring at him, and picked himself up, brushing his legs down.

“Kankuro,” Chouza said, with more than a hint of annoyance in his voice, “don't flatter yourself. I don't _care_. I'm an Elder and one of the two Jounin Commanders. I have better things to worry about than what you do in the bedroom.”

“We're not like those idiots in Suna,” added Shikamaru sternly. “We value your skills, Kankuro. If people have a problem with you or Tenten teaching their children, tough. It's intelligence and skill that matters first and foremost in this job. You know that yourself.”

“Anyway,” Chouza said, “I'd love to stay and chat, but I've got some chuunin to brief. Don't forget to thank Tsume, Kankuro. She's the one who started it, Izanagi love her.” He grasped Kankuro's hand in his and shook it, nearly crushing the younger shinobi's fingers, and disappeared back into the building.

“C'mon, you,” Shikamaru said, as Kankuro nursed his throbbing hand. “You'rean earth type, aren't you? Like my dad. Fancy coming to do some elemental training with me? I need an opponent who isn't Dad for a change. If I can get hold of Chouji or Ino, so much the better. Chouji's got his _Fuuton_ nailed, but Ino's still getting to grips with her _Suiton_.”

“Let me pick up my puppets first,” Kankuro said, “and then I'll come down to your place.”

“See you later, mate,” said Shikamaru, waving briefly, before turning back to his fire practice.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

When Kankuro finally got back to the Inuzuka compound after training with Shikamaru, he found Kiba sitting anxiously on the front step. He jumped up and exclaimed, “Where the hell have you been?”

“I went off to see Shikamaru and Chouza, and then I got caught up training with Shikamaru,” Kankuro explained. “And I stopped off to buy a few...things. Apparently your mum's behind all this malarkey.”

“Yeah,” said Kiba. He smiled. “Those kids are mad. They're like a handful of puppies. I'm gonna miss them.”

“She's a strange woman, your mum,” sighed Kankuro, scratching his forehead. “But at least she's not scratching and biting me. Gods, she's worse than my sister.”

“I dunno,” said Kiba, “your sister has to be pretty fierce if she married Shikamaru. He's totally her bitch. I think it runs in the family.”

“In our side, too,” said Kankuro. He attached chakra strings to Kiba's arm. “I think this calls for a celebration.”

Upstairs.

“Close your eyes,” instructed Kankuro, and he fished around in the bag he normally used for ninja supplies, until he found what he was looking for: a small black box. “Alright, you can look now.”

Kiba opened his eyes to find the older jounin kneeling down before him, his face upturned, his expression a mixture of solemnity and hope and love and nervousness, holding out an open box with a plain gold band embedded in it. Kiba's eyes opened wide.

_Is he..._

“Kiba Inuzuka, will you marry me?”

Kiba said something inaudible.

“What?”

“Yes!”

Kankuro placed the box on Kiba's desk, knelt down once again, and took Kiba's hand in his. He brushed it against his face and neck, and then rested his head against Kiba's chest, his chin on his lover's knees. Kiba stroked Kankuro's neck and hair.

 _I don't want this moment to end,_ he thought. _If I could freeze time right now, I would. If only just so I could hold him for longer. His body against mine. Oh, Kankuro, my lovely Kankuro. Thank you...thank you..._

Aloud, he said, “While you're down there...” and Kankuro lowered his head, took Kiba's erect cock in his mouth, and began to suck it gently, flicking his tongue around the tip.

 


	15. Wolf: Preparation

 As Koutei Sarutobi-Yuuhi helped himself to another plateful of seaweed, Kiba looked across the kitchen table at his former sensei, the shadows of candlelight playing on her face, and thought how well she was aging. She had grey strands in her hair, and her face was getting more lined, but she was still as beautiful as ever. Before he'd realised he preferred men, he'd had a bit of a crush on her.

“You nervous about the wedding?” asked Konohamaru, who had also dropped in to have dinner.

“A little,” Kiba admitted, dunking a piece of beef in sweet chili sauce. He chewed on the meat, swallowed, and said, “I'm not good with formal stuff, and I know there are people in Konoha who don't approve.”

“Fu...er, I mean, _ignore_ them,” said Konohamaru, as his aunt kicked him under the table. Kiba looked at him and marvelled at how tall and handsome he had become. He remembered Konohamaru way back when he was a little kid with gaps in his teeth and that stupid cape he always wore. Now he was almost a dead ringer for his late uncle – he even had a beard - and towered over nearly all the other clan heads, Chouza being the exception. Kiba had some trouble reconciling the two, even though he'd seen Konohamaru grow up. He recalled hearing that Kankuro had bullied Konohamaru the first time he had come to Konoha, after he'd bumped into him while being chased by Sakura.

“Can I go over to Auntie Hinata's after tea?” Koutei was asking Kurenai. “She said she wants someone to test her Rotation on.”

“Hinata's going to _fight_ you? What have you done?” Kiba exclaimed, and Kurenai laughed. “No, it's like the training her cousin used to do with Tenten. Koutei throws weapons, Hinata repels them. It'll be a good opportunity for you to practise your _Sogu_ , Koutei. Just don't stay too long.”

Koutei wolfed down the rest of his food, patted Akamaru on the head, and rushed off to train with his mentor. Kiba recalled Shikamaru telling him that both he and Hinata had promised Kurenai to help raise Koutei, and even though they now both had children of their own, they still would stop by at Kurenai's place with gifts or advice, or invite him over for training. Shikamaru had also said that Konohamaru was currently looking after the knives Shikamaru had inherited from Asuma, to be given to Koutei once he graduated from the Academy.

He helped Kurenai with the clearing, washing up and storing the leftovers in the fridge, while Akamaru lay on the floor with his head between his paws. As Kurenai poured herself another glass of wine, Kiba asked tentatively, “It doesn't upset you, does it?”

“What doesn't upset me?” Kurenai asked, puzzled. “Your wedding?”

“Yeah, 'cause you know...Asuma...I just thought it might make you a bit sad.”

Kurenai pushed back her hair and smiled gently. She took Kiba's hand. “Kiba, that's really sweet of you. I do think about him a lot, I always will, but don't worry. The thought of you getting married doesn't make me sad. Asuma wouldn't want that.” She looked at him thoughtfully. “You know, the old genin Kiba would never have asked me that. I remember how you and Hinata and Shino were when I first met you, and now, my little genin are all grown up and getting married – well, not Shino, but he's got a girlfriend, though I've not met her yet.”

“Does Koutei still see Shikamaru and Hinata a lot these days?” Kiba asked.

“Not as much as he used to,” said Kurenai. “But they'll always be there for him, both of them. I know Hinata's doing it for more for my sake.” _She was_ , Kiba thought. Kurenai had always been the closest thing Hinata had had to a parental figure, ever since Hiashi, upon realising that Hanabi was far stronger than Hinata, had all but abandoned his older daughter, saying she was not fit to succeed him. Hinata had vowed to repay Kurenai for her kindness, and had been to visit her in the hospital, along with Shikamaru, after Koutei had been born.

“So how's the planning going?” Kurenai asked. Kiba shrugged. “Kankuro's dealing with all the planning and stuff,” he said, laughing. “I wouldn't have a clue.”

Later, they stood in the doorway of Kurenai's house, and she hugged Kiba and said, “Thanks for coming over. It means a lot, it really does.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

A week later, at another kitchen table – this time, it was Hinata's – three women and a man were discussing wedding protocol. Hinata, Temari and Hana had taken it upon themselves to form a wedding planners' committee, and together with Kankuro, they had sat down and put their heads together.

Kankuro had been to the Hyuuga compound a few times with Kiba, and fortunately for both of them, Hinata, Kou and the children were living in their own section now, so the disapproving glances of her father wouldn't be following them everywhere. He liked her place, that was for certain. He'd expected it to be as spotless and sober as a museum, but was pleasantly surprised to find out it was just as warm and comforting and chaotic as the Inuzuka place, albeit without the dogs padding around underfoot. Hinata's kitchen table had coffee rings ingrained on its surface, Kou's ridiculous record collection kept seeping out into other rooms, and available surfaces were nearly always covered in paperwork, but there was always a vase of sweet-smelling flowers on display, throws and cushions in warm colours scattered over the sofa, and boxes of homegrown herbs on the kitchen windowsill. The kitchen always had a warm, homey smell that was a blend of spices and roasted vegetables and coffee and slightly charred toast. Kiba, who lived life through his nose, had jokingly asked Hinata if she could adopt him, or at least let him sit in her kitchen for a while and inhale the smells. The four shinobi were seated around the kitchen table, drinking tea, while Hiyori amused herself with building blocks.

“So who's going to do the seven circles?” Temari was asking. “You or Kiba?”

“Kiba and Akamaru can walk round me, since that's what wolves do in the wild, isn't it,” Kankuro decided. “And I'll break the wine glass. Yes, I know, bridegroom's job, but there are two of us and I'm the older one. Speaking of which, this isn't going to be the first wedding in Konoha with two bridegrooms, is it?”

“Nah,” replied his sister. “Izumo and Kotetsu have you beaten. They didn't do much, though. Just the ceremony at the shrine and then everyone went down the pub. No flowers or anything.”

“Have you decided on flowers?” Hinata asked. “You'll probably have to get your orders in soon. Are you using Yamanaka Florists?”

“Hell yeah,” said Kankuro. “And I've picked a colour scheme, it's got to be purple and white flowers. I'll leave it to Ino to pick which ones, she's got this thing about personality types and flowers, Shikamaru said.” _Oh gods_ , he thought, _I sound like such a bloody_ diva.

Hana ticked off 'flowers' and 'bride/bridegroom rituals' on her list.

“Yoshino's said she'll help with food,” Temari said, “and I'll do my bit.”

“And the clan members are going to be bringing a fair bit themselves,” added Hana. “Since you've got all those dogs to feed. And Hinata, did you say you were making some bits and pieces?”

“Me and Chouji,” Hinata replied. “He's volunteered to help with the food as well, although one can interpret that statement in a number of ways.” Hana ticked off 'food'.

“And you've found a priest?” asked Temari. Kankuro nodded. “There's a priestess at the Konoha Lucky Gods shrine who said she'd do it. She did those other two guys. And she's bringing a couple of miko. I suppose you're going to ask about the attendants and the blessings? I thought I'd told you.”

“Remind me,” said Temari.

“ _The customary choices for the seven attendants at a shinobi wedding are the bridegroom and/or bride's parents, siblings, team mates and squad leader_ ,” Hinata recited. “So that means me, Hana, Shino, Tsume-sama and Kurenai-sensei for Kiba, and Temari, Gaara and Baki for you then.”

“Temari's the only plausible one for my side,” sighed Kankuro. “So that's six. Temari, could Shikamaru do one as well, do you think?”

“Can't see him objecting,” said Temari. She got up and made herself another cup of tea.

Kankuro skim-read the printed sheet the priestess had given him, which showed the seven blessings recited at Konoha weddings, for the various spirits to grant the bridal couple long life, strength, health, courage, love, peace and happiness. He'd been an attendant at Temari and Shikamaru's wedding, along with Shikaku and Yoshino, Ino, Chouji, and the respective Kages of Konoha and Suna, and recited the fifth blessing. He stared down into his mug of tea and pondered.

“I think,” he said slowly, after having considered the potential order, “that Tsume and Hana should go first. Then all of Team Eight, and I guess Kurenai's first since she's squad leader. So Tsume does long life, Hana does strength, Kurenai does health, Hinata does courage” - _very fitting for Hinata_ , he thought, but did not want to say it out loud - “Shino does love, Temari, you do peace, and Shikamaru does happiness. Is that OK?”

The women said it was. Upstairs, Hiroshi began to wail.

“I'd better go and see how he is,” called Hinata over her shoulder as she rushed up the stairs. “Carry on without me, everyone.”

“Nothing in the shinobi world is ever simple,” was the complaint Kankuro had heard numerous times from other shinobi and, he discovered, it extended to planning weddings.

There were so many bloody things to consider. Flowers, outfits, the religious angle, guests, food, timings, readings...of course, if he'd left it up to Kiba, nothing would have been done. The man couldn't organise a piss-up in the proverbial brewery, and anyway, he was on duty in Kumogakure with a bunch of other tracker-nin and sensor-nin who'd been asked to find the site of a suspected mass grave, containing the bodies of a group of Kumogakure shinobi, amongst others. The Raikage had sensor-nin of his own out there, but had requested that Naruto send over some of the members of the clans who were particularly skilled in tracking: the Inuzuka, the Hyuuga, the Aburame and the Yamanaka. Members of those clans, two Inuzuka among them – one of them Kiba – had gone off to pinpoint the exact location. Shino had also gone. He and Kiba were on speaking terms, but the stubborn bastard still wasn't particularly friendly towards Kankuro. Hinata, meanwhile, had stayed home to look after her children.

When Kiba returned from Kumogakure, he was shaken and subdued. He did not throw himself on Kankuro with his usual abandon, the way he normally did when one of them had come back from a mission.

Kankuro eventually prised it out of him. Although he had been briefed by Shikaku about the horrors he would encounter, nothing in the world could prepare Kiba for what he saw.

When they had arrived at the suspected site, his foot had been sucked down into the marshy ground, and as he pulled it out, a sizeable amount of earth came with it, revealing a decomposing limb jutting out from the ground. The skin was turning black, and crawling with maggots. He had shouted for Darui, Kumogakure's Jounin Commander, to come over and have a look. Meanwhile, Akamaru had instictively begun to dig, and unearthed the top half of a corpse of unknown gender. Half of its face had rotted away, its teeth in a rictus grin, its eyesockets leaking. One shinobi nearby had been violently sick.

“This is it,” Darui had confirmed. “Alright, then. Let the digging begin.”

The stench of rotting bodies was unbearable, so much so that Kiba choked and retched, the horrible smell snaking down his throat and into his stomach. With his mouth and nose covered, he had begun to dig, as other shinobi carried out the gruesome task of packing the bodies to be returned to Kumogakure for identification. It did not take long to unearth the dead. Some of the corpses had rotted away until only bones, the plates of their forehead protectors and scraps of cloth remained, but others had only been buried recently, and already death was starting to eat away at their flesh, turning it grey and black, boring deep holes, turning solid into dust and mush – for some of the bodies were liquefying, and had fallen apart as the shinobi had tried to remove them from the ground. They had found fingers, toes, decapitated heads, their fingers becoming more and more caked in the stinking, fluid-soaked soil. Even Shino had been shaken.

“And then,” he said, “when we was digging, I found this corpse, and it was as big as my arm...and it was a baby. A fucking baby. Its little fists was clenched. Can you imagine that, Kankuro? This poor little thing...only been in this world for a few weeks, days, and it, it had its whole life ahead of it, but now it'll never grow up, it's been shoved in a hole in the ground in some fucking _swamp_ like a piece of rubbish, a living thing, a human, not a piece of shit...how did it end up there? It looked so peaceful, Kankuro, the other corpses, some of them had their mouths open, like they was screaming, but this one...it looked like it was sleeping and...”

He could not finish his sentence. He threw back his head and howled. Then he buried his head in his hands and began to cry.

Kankuro was shaken. He could not remember the last time he had seen Kiba cry. He wrapped his arms around his lover and held him tightly, wishing he could squeeze all the pain out of him, make him forget what he had seen. Kiba's back was shaking violently, his tears soaking Kankuro's sweater, and Kankuro stroked his hair and murmured, “It's alright, Kiba, it's over, you're home now, my love,” as he forced himself to bite back his own tears.

_I'm getting soft in my old age. But then...I can't bear to see him in pain. What hurts him hurts me._

He realised with a shock that the only other people who had ever made him feel that way were Gaara and Temari. _I love him like I love my own family...well, he is my family now._

Eventually, Kiba stopped crying and rubbed his eyes. “I'm sorry, Kankuro. I dunno what came over me. It's not like I've never seen dead people before.”

“Hey,” Kankuro said. He plopped himself down on the bed. Kiba sat down beside him and instictively reached for his hand. “It's a shitty job, being a shinobi. It gets to the best of us.”

“And Shino can't make the wedding either,” Kiba added, apropos of nothing. “ANBU stuff.”

“Oh, great,” Kankuro sighed. “Just fucking great.” Then he looked at Kiba's tearstained face, thought of the mass graves, and squeezed his hand.

“I'll think of something,” he said. “I always do.”

They did not have sex that night. Kiba was worn out, and neither he nor Kankuro were in the mood. Kankuro lay brooding in the dark, his hands linked behind his head, and tried to think of a plan.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

“So we're down to six attendants now,” Kankuro said gloomily, as he sat at Hinata's kitchen table the next day, along with Kurenai, Temari and Hana. Hinata was making more cups of tea. “You four, Tsume and Shikamaru. I can't think of anyone else.”

“How about one of your colleagues?” asked Hinata. “Lee? Tenten? I don't suppose Sir Gaara or your old sensei can come, can they?”

“'Fraid not,” said Temari. “Gaara's too preoccupied and he needs Baki there. I'm surprised he even made it to _our_ wedding, to be honest. And I'm not entirely sure Gaara's happy about your students going, unless he can find some jounin to accompany them.”

Kankuro grimaced and massaged his temples. Sending for anyone from Sunagakure was going to be just too complicated, he didn't need Temari to tell him that. Then inspiration struck him, and he said, “Who says it has to be seven attendants? The Hokage had eleven attendants, didn't he?”

“That's because he's the _Hokage_ ,” said Temari. “He can do what he likes.”

“But our wedding's hardly traditional either,” Kankuro argued, “and anyway, I've got two perfect people in mind.”

“Who?” asked the women, and Kankuro told them. Temari nearly spat out her tea, but Kurenai laughed and said, “Why not?”

“Just wait till I tell Mum,” said Hana with a grin. “She's going to love this. Right, that's that sorted. Assuming you get permission.”

And so it was that Kankuro strolled into the Hokage's office and asked his brother-in-law, who was wandering down the steps carrying Konoha's Bingo Book, if he knew where Chouza and Sakura were. “I think they're on the roof,” said Shikamaru. “Sakura had a load of balloons with her, so I think they're doing some Rasengan training with Jiraiya.”

“What is it with the Rasengan and balloons?” Kankuro asked.

“Oh, the original Jiraiya made Naruto test the sharpness of his Rasengan by popping balloons with it, and that's what gave Sakura and the missus the idea,” said Shikamaru. “Asuma explained it to me, except he did it differently, with leaves. Make your chakra thin and sharp and it can cut like a normal blade, he said. What do you want to see them for, anyway? You've discovered you're a wind user and not an earth user?”

“Have I balls,” laughed Kankuro. “It's about the wedding. I need some attendants and Shino's dropped out.”

“Good luck, mate,” said Shikamaru with a shrug. “Anyway, I've got some reading on S-ranked criminals to do. Fun and games. Catch you later.”

After bumping into Neji and Hanabi - who were talking animatedly about some mission or other that Hanabi had been on - and exchanging greetings and talk about Hinata, Kankuro emerged onto the roof of the Hokage building, where he found Chouza and Sakura sitting on the ground. He almost snorted. The pair of them were blowing up balloons and ramming them into a large net, evidently for the Hokage's son to use for his Rasengan target practice. He watched as Chouza blew up a red one, his hands and lips wrapped around its neck, and remembered how Chouji had looked exactly the same that time they'd had the foursome, on his hands and knees with his hands tied and Kiba's cock in his mouth, while Akamaru, in Kiba's shape, fucked him from behind, and Kankuro had sat and watched and masturbated, and then, desperate to join in, he'd swapped places from Akamaru and fucked Chouji, his hands in the younger shinobi's thick chestnut hair. He realised with some embarrassment that he was hard.

_My gods, am I really that sexually frustrated? OK, so me and Kiba didn't have sex last night, but I've gone without for longer, and yet I'm so horny at the moment, I'm as bad as he is when it's a full moon, seeing sex everywhere. Maybe it's the wedding. Oh gods, I'd better say something._

He bowed and said, “Sorry to interrupt you, Chouza-sama, Sakura-sama, but I wish to speak with you.”

“Morning, Kankuro,” called the two jounin, and Chouza added, “And don't even think about making any smart-arsed comments about me being full of hot air, I've already had it from Shikaku.”

“I wouldn't dream of it,” Kankuro lied. “Can I talk to you for a bit?”

“Depends what about,” said Sakura, tying a knot in the neck of the balloon she had just blown up. “Is it official or unofficial?”

Kankuro told them.

“Eight attendants?” mused Chouza, as Sakura finished with her batch of balloons. “How unorthodox. I can't remember the last time anyone had eight.”

“You could do the seventh blessing jointly,” said Kankuro. “Of course,” he added quickly, “if you have any objections on religious, social or moral grounds to our wedding, let me know and...”

Chouza slapped his forehead with his hand and sighed. “Kankuro. We've been through this. There are many things that make me angry, and your love life is not one of them, alright? I don't _care_.” He picked up another balloon and blew it up. _How weird is this conversation?_ Kankuro thought. _We're all ninjas, we're trained to kill people, and yet here we are in our civvies, we're talking about a wedding, and the Hokage's wife and the head of the Akimichi clan, who is also one of the Jounin Commanders, are sitting on the floor blowing up balloons like they're preparing for a kids' party, except it's actually for her son's training._

“I'll do it,” said Sakura. She smiled. “I'd be honoured to. Gods, it's so weird to think of Kiba Inuzuka of all people tying the knot. It seems like only yesterday we were all in Iruka-sensei's class, and now we've most of us got kids of our own, we're getting older, we're getting teams of our own...oh, gods, there I go again.”

“You make me feel old, Sakura-sama,” Chouza protested amiably. “My son was in your class, remember?” He looked at Kankuro. “Count me in. I assume your brother can't make it?”

Kankuro shook his head.

“There's a problem, though,” said Sakura. “The two of us are due to go out on a mission the day after tomorrow. Documents in the wrong hands, very hush-hush.”

Kankuro's heart sank. “How long for?”

“Shikaku reckons it should take about five or six days or so,” said Chouza. “It's still in Hinokuni, so we've not got far to go, so we should be back for the wedding. Sorry, Kankuro, but I don't need to tell you shinobi business comes first. And Sakura can't go unaccompanied, she always has to have a bodyguard with her. Usually it's Shizune or me. Shizune went last time, so she's stuck with me.” He and Sakura exchanged amused glances.

 _Why is he telling me this?_ Kankuro thought, irritated. _I have to do the same thing for Gaara...ah, sod it. They said yes._

The three jounin looked at each other in silence. Kankuro absent-mindedly toyed with his sweatshirt, Chouza with his headband, and Sakura pulled the net shut.

“I'd better go home,” Chouza said, picking himself up. “My sister's off-duty and I promised her I'd train with her today.”

“And I've got a small boy to train,” added Sakura. “I know he's a bit young to learn the Rasengan, but my husband wants him to start early.”

Kankuro took his cue. “Thank you both,” he said. “It means a lot, it really does.” He bowed so deeply that his nose nearly touched his knees, and the two jounin smiled warmly at him, and he wanted to take their hands and embrace them both, and he knew deep down that somehow, everything was going to work out for him and Kiba, somehow.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

The eve of the joint stag party arrived, but as Kiba was still recovering from his mission, he and Kankuro decided to make it a low-key affair and invite only a small group of people: Lee, Chouji, Konohamaru, Shikamaru – who would be coming later, after he'd put the kids to bed and caught up on some marking – Neji, and Sai. Shino and Shikoku had also been invited but could not attend, as the former was on ANBU duty, and the latter was looking after the kids while Hana worked late.

It didn't take Akamaru to notice that the mood was very subdued. Although Lee and Konohamaru were as cheerful as ever, Sai seemed distracted – Kankuro and Kiba did not know that Ino had been suffering from post-natal depression, and Sai had been helpless and had had to rely on her parents for support – and Chouji was unsmiling and more quiet than usual. He sat hunched over the table, his usual wad of gum in his mouth, staring into his pint.

“What are you sitting there with a face like a slapped arse for?” demanded Kiba, using a sentence construction that would have made Shikamaru wince. “C'mon, cheer up, you miserable git. This is supposed to be a happy occasion.”

“And people say _I'm_ tactless,” commented Sai to nobody in particular. Kiba turned on him. “What the fuck is _that_ supposed to mean?”

“It's Dad,” sighed Chouji. “He's on a mission with Sakura, they were ordered to find some documents containing key defence points which got into the wrong hands or some shit like that. Shikamaru was there and he told me they estimated it would only take them about five to six days. And now it's been...what, nearly two weeks? And they're still not back.”

Kiba slapped his forehead. “Shit. I didn't realise. Sorry, mate.”

“Don't underestimate Sakura-sama, old chap,” said Lee sternly. “Your father will be keeping her safe, will he not?”

“All the same,” said Chouji, twisting a strand of hair round his finger. “It's a fucking A-rank mission. They're pretty dangerous, whoever these guys are. Shikamaru didn't want to say too much. But Dad and Sakura don't fuck around. And Mum's getting worried too.”

 _She's not the only one who's worried_ , _my fucking wedding's in two days' time_ , Kankuro thought, and then mentally castigated himself. _You selfish arsehole. You're worried about your attendants. Chouji's worried about his_ father. _And gods know what Jiraiya and Naruto are going through..._

 _May Benten-sama keep them safe_.

“If you're up for going to shrine later to pray for them,” he said out loud, “let me know. I'd be happy to join you.”

“Chouza and Sakura will be OK,” said Sai firmly, spearing an olive on a cocktail stick. “I'm her team mate, I know how she works. So relax, alright?”

As his mother had done during her meeting with Chouza, Kiba poked his finger into the bubble that Chouji was blowing, deflating it.

“Don't _do_ that,” said Chouji testily.

“Well, don't fucking blow bubbles then,” retorted Kiba. “It makes you look really stupid when you do it, anyway.”

Chouji's face darkened. Neji and Lee looked at one another and raised their eyebrows. Although Chouji was calmer than he used to be, the old temper was still boiling away, deep down, and tiny bubbles were beginning to rise to the surface. Lee laid a calming arm on Chouji's shoulder, and Kankuro decided to take charge.

“Sai's right, Chouji,” he said. “I'm sure your dad and Sakura-sama are going to be walking behind me in the shrine. If, gods forbid, I'm wrong, I'll pay for a round of barbecue just for you. No, no, I'll cook barbecue for you. I'm a fucking god in the kitchen, alright? My food makes him” - and he pointed at Kiba - “jizz in his pants. Just think about it, Chouji. Those chunks of delicious, juicy, succulent beef, sizzling on the hotplate” - he made the relevant sound effects - “dripping tiny little droplets of fat onto the hotplate.” He stood up, leaned over the table, cupped Chouji's round face in his hands, stared into the small brown eyes and continued, “And then you pick one up and put it in your mouth and bite down, _haaaaard_ , and it releases its meaty goodness, and as you chew on that succulent meat, you can feel all those juices trickling down your throat. Oh, I'll cook you barbecue, Chouji, and after that your wife's cooking will never be enough for you again. You'll be over at our place begging for the sweet taste of that beef. And let's invite Yumi too, shall we?” By this time, he was almost nose-to-nose with Chouji. He ran his tongue snakelike over his top lip.

Neji ducked as Konohamaru snorted beer out of his nose. Lee murmured, “I _say_.”

It worked. Chouji smiled, and said, “Y'know, I will take you up on that.” Kankuro sat back down.

“Somehow, I don't think you're talking about cooking,” commented Sai.

“Whatever gave you that impression?” said Kankuro feigning innocence, and Kiba slapped Chouji on the back and said, “C'mon, mate, cheer up. They'll be back in one piece, and not in a body bag either.”

“Who's for doing shots?” announced Konohamaru, standing up. Chouji, Kankuro, Kiba and Sai raised their hands.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

The night before the wedding dawned, and Kankuro and Kiba were still two attendants down. Kankuro prowled the Inuzuka sitting room like a restless wolf. Akamaru lay on the floor and whined.

“Will you sit down?” Kiba complained. “You're making me itch.”

Kankuro knew Kiba was probably as worried as he was, but wasn't showing it. “I need to go and speak to the Hokage,” he said. “You stay here.”

“What d'you need to speak to him for?”

Kankuro wondered whether to invent a pretext, but Kiba looked so earnestly puzzled that he decided to tell the truth. “I want to find out where the hell our attendants are.”

“You can't ask Naruto-sama that!” Kiba protested. “You'll probably get done for wasting the Hokage's time.”

“I can, and I will,” growled Kankuro. “Just watch me.” And he left the Inuzuka compound, letting the door swing shut behind him. No-one stopped him going into the Hokage's building; as brother of the Kazekage and trusted liaison to Suna, he was automatically allowed access.

Naruto was sitting at his desk, a tearstained Jiraiya on his lap, when Kankuro knocked and entered. Hiashi, Shikaku, Shibi, Shikamaru and Neji were all crowded around him.

“Evening,” said Naruto. “I think I know why you're here.” He was smiling, but his smile was strained, and his eyes were anxious. Shikaku's brow was furrowed, and he barely acknowledged Kankuro's presence.

“Would you like me to send a message to my brother?” Kankuro asked. “If Chouza-sama and Sakura-sama are in danger, maybe some reinforcements from Suna would help.”

“ _Really_ , Kankuro,” said Hiashi, irritated. “Konoha are quite capable of managing on our own.”

“I did send out some bugs as an initial measure,” said Shibi. “No sign as yet, I'm afraid.”

Jiraiya was getting agitated again, and Naruto stroked his hair and murmured, “Don't be scared, Jiraiya. You'll get your mummy back, I promise.”

Two sad green eyes looked up at him.

“I swear it on my honour as Hokage,” said Naruto. Kankuro looked at him and remembered, with a pang, of how frightened and angry he had been that terrible day when Gaara had been kidnapped, and his own stupidity had nearly been the end of him. Naruto and Sakura had been among the group who had gone after Gaara, and Naruto had wept over Gaara's body and later, poured some of his own chakra into it.

He walked over to the Hokage, ruffled Jiraiya's hair and said gently, “I know how you feel, kid. It's always scary when our loved ones don't come back.” Shikamaru, seeing his child-hating brother-in-law being so uncharacteristically gentle, bit down hard on his lip.

Everybody jumped as Shikaku slammed his fist down on Naruto's desk.

“ _Enough!_ ” he roared. “Enough! They _will_ be safe! There will be _no question of it!_ ”

Shikamaru stared. It took a lot for his father to raise his voice. He laid a calming hand on Shikaku's shoulder.

“We must be calm and rational about this,” said Neji. “Please, Shikaku-sama. There's no use getting worked up about it.”

“Easy for you to...” Kankuro began, but he was interrupted by a knock on the door.

A familiar voice called, “Naruto, it's us.”

Kankuro breathed a prayer of thanks to Benten. Not only because he now had a full set of attendants, but also because it was such a relief to see Naruto genuinely smiling. He bounded over his desk, Jiraiya still in his arms, and waited by the door.

Sakura had barely walked into the room when Jiraiya sprang out of his father's arms and flung himself at her, knocking the air out of her lungs and squealing, “Mummy! Mummy!” Sakura knelt down and hugged her son, saying, “I'm sorry I was away for so long, Jiraiya. Has Daddy been good?”

“'Course he's been good,” said Jiraiya almost indignantly. “Daddy's the _Hokage_.”

Sakura picked Jiraiya up and hoisted him onto her shoulders. Naruto threw his arms around Sakura and hugged her tightly, as Jiraiya clung on to her.

“Welcome home, Sakura-chan,” he murmured. “I'm so glad you're OK.”

Chouza Akimichi staggered into the room, placing his hand on the doorframe to support himself, took two steps forward, and collapsed onto his hands and knees.

“My lord...we....we made it,” he croaked. “I...beg your...pardon...but please...someone...get me...something to...eat.”

“Chouza,” said Shikaku, hiding a smile, “you are a pain in the arse.” But he rushed downstairs to see if there was any food in the Jounin Commanders' office, and came back with a plate of cold chicken that had been left in the office fridge, and a small bunch of black grapes. Chouza, salivating at the smell of food, bent over the plate like a dog and shoved great handfuls of breast meat into his mouth, savagely tearing meat off the bone of a chicken leg with his teeth, not particularly caring who saw him. He demolished the grapes and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. Kankuro and Shikamaru were not bothered – Kankuro had seen Gaara behave in a similar way in his 'crazy period', and Shikamaru had an Akimichi on his team and was used to watching them eat - but Hiashi could not hide his expression of disgust.

Shikamaru cleared his throat. “Er...the documents, have you got them?”

“We stopped off at Interrogation and left 'em with Ino,” replied Sakura. “I'll debrief in a bit. This little one” - she nodded at Jiraiya - “is up past his bedtime. Say goodnight to Daddy, Jiraiya.”

“G'night, Daddy,” said Jiraiya, as Naruto ruffled his hair. Sakura made her way to the living quarters she shared with her family. Chouza knocked back the cup of tea that Neji had made for him. “Ahh,” he sighed. “I feel better already.”

“I'm surprised my hair isn't completely grey yet, the amount of trouble you and Inoichi put me through,” moaned Shikaku. “Why didn't you send word?”

“We had to lie low for a bit,” replied Chouza. “They were coming after us. Blowing up a building is not exactly inconspicuous” - and here, Neji snorted, as he recalled the countless explosions his team had caused - “and even with Sakura's smoke bombs and transformations and gods know what else, we couldn't take any chances.” He decided not to tell his team mate that he had also had a relapse, suffering flashbacks that he was convinced were an illusion, and biting his fingers until they bled and stabbing himself with a kunai to make them go away. Sakura had had to incapacitate him, and had refused to return to Konoha until she knew he was safe. That could wait. He did not want to show any weakness in front of Hiashi.

Naruto took charge. “Right, then,” he said. “Once the missus gets back, we'll begin the debrief.” He waved a hand at Kankuro. “Stay if you like. Just in case Suna needs to know anything.”

Upstairs, Sakura bathed Jiraiya, put him to bed, and went back down to Naruto's room for the debrief.

“So,” said Shikaku, when they were all sitting comfortably around Naruto's desk or on the floor, “how many hit lists are you two on now?”

“Probably as many as there are people in Konoha,” said Sakura calmly. “I think Chouza's on more than me though.”

“He's got pissing people off down to a fine art,” said Shikaku. Hiashi wisely decided not to say anything.

“If so many people want me dead, then I must be doing something right,” Chouza retorted. “And you and Inoichi are on as many hit lists as I am, Shikaku, if not more in your case.” He grimaced and massaged his wrists. “Gods, my wrists are killing me – don't. Say. _Anything,_ ” he added as Shikaku smiled and raised an eyebrow at him.

“Being tied up for a long period of time does that to you,” said Sakura calmly. “And my back's still killing me from crawling around in that air vent. The movies don't tell you just how bloody small they really are.”

“I think you and I both need a long hot shower,” said Chouza. “Anyway, enough of this. I'm tired. Let's get down to debriefing.” Shikaku leaned forward, pen and paper at the ready.

Between them, the two jounin gave the room a blow-by-blow account of what had happened, as Naruto listened intently and Shikaku jotted down notes. Sakura and Chouza had gone to a small town in Hinokuni, where the targets were said to be operating. After finding the targets' base, a disused office building, they had allowed themselves to be captured.

The targets had overpowered the two shinobi, and Chouza and Sakura, faking unconsciousness, had been bound, gagged and left in one of the rooms in the building. After a period of struggling, and with some cooperation, they had managed to free themselves, and Sakura had crawled into an air vent and negotiated her way around the building until she found where the blueprints had been stored. However, the targets had sensed something was amiss, and had come charging down the corridor, only to find themselves face to face with Chouza. As Sakura had gathered up the evidence she needed and climbed back into the air vent system, he had kept the approaching targets at bay with a combination of explosive tags and _Fuusen Gamu no Jutsu -_ “my lungs are still killing me, and incidentally, kudos to you for coming up with the idea, Shikamaru,” he said as an aside, and Shikamaru smirked self-consciously and looked at his feet.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” exclaimed Kankuro, holding up his hands. “You mean you use _bubble gum_ as a weapon? How the f...I mean, _how in the world_?”

Chouza sighed. He had been asked this question a lot of times. “Yes, Kankuro,” he said wearily, “it does what it says on the tin.”

“Shinobi,” said Hiashi, as if by rote, “are supposed to improvise with whatever objects they can find, or that they may have on their person, if they haven't got any weapons to hand. As a jounin, you, Kankuro, should know this. It is not at all uncommon for members of the Akimichi clan to use food, or implements, as weapons. I recall one clan member beat an enemy to death with a leg of mutton.”

“You should see what I can do with a _spork,_ ” said Chouza with an evil smile.

“It's quite simple, really,” said Shikamaru. “You knead chakra in your mouth and chew it in with the gum and then you...”

“Explain another time, _if_ you don't mind,” interrupted his father. “We need to be getting on with this. Continue, you two.”

His team mate and Sakura continued. The resulting explosion had destroyed most of the corridor, and taken out some of the targets with it. Sakura, the evidence safely stowed down her top, had crawled through the vent, dropped down in another room, and eliminated the targets she found there, gathering more evidence on the way. Once she had found Chouza, there was no time to waste. The two of them had headed straight back for Konoha. A handy smoke bomb (“or two,” said Sakura) had enabled them to get far enough from the building without arousing suspicion for the time being. However, they had had to hide in the next village, and then in the woods, for several days.

“They did quite a number on us,” said Sakura, holding out her arms to show the other jounin the marks left by the ropes. She and Chouza had been tied back to back, their hands and feet bound, and it had taken the pair of them longer than anticipated to free themselves. It was a bloody good thing that she was so flexible, she thought.

“At least they didn't gag me with my headband,” Chouza said with a wry smile. “I hate it when people do that. It's kind of undignified, and Pine - _Shikaku_ , pack it in,” as Shikaku snorted.

“What did they use?” Kankuro heard himself asking.

“Some kind of cloth,” said Chouza. He raised an eyebrow at Kankuro, who was just beginning to notice the tiny red patches in the corners of Chouza and Sakura's mouths, where their gags had irritated the skin as they tried to twist themselves free. “Odd question.”

“I can't say I blame them. They probably wanted a bit of peace,” said Shikaku, ignoring the death glare Chouza gave him. “And you most definitely did not leave any survivors?”

Both jounin shook their heads.

“I must say, that was quite a stupid thing to do, getting yourselves captured,” said Neji severely. “What if they'd checked to make sure you weren't faking unconsciousness?”

“Please, Neji,” said Chouza, annoyed, “I've been doing this shit for years.” Shikaku nodded. Sakura added, “Sometimes you've got to be stupid, Neji. Anyway, we got what we needed. Intel will send someone over with the docs over the next week. Anything else?”

“No, thank you,” said Shikaku, “that will be all.” He smiled at Kankuro. “You'd better get yourself home. You've got a long day tomorrow.”

“See you down the shrine,” Sakura called after him as Kankuro took his leave.

His final two attendants had returned. Tomorrow, he and Kiba would be married.

 _Thank you, Benten-sama. Thank you_.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

While Kiba and Kankuro were having their last night of unmarried sex, elsewhere in the Inuzuka compound, Hana was having difficulty sleeping. As Shikoku snored next to her, she sat on the edge of the bed and absent-mindedly stroked the head of the oldest of the three brothers, and thought how funny it was that it still hadn't quite sunk in that her little brother was going to be married.

In the bedroom down the corridor from the one Kiba and Kankuro shared, Tsume lay curled around Kuromaru.

In the Hokage's household, Sakura stood under the shower head, her face uplifted, and let the water wash away the grime left behind by the mission. She was too tired for sex. All she wanted was to lie down somewhere comfortable, let her body sink into the sheets, and try and forget what she had seen.

Temari held her vibrator against her clit until she came with a jerk. She switched it off, placed it on the bedside table, and buried her face in the sleeping Shikamaru's shoulder.

Hinata untangled herself from Kou. He stroked her hair and kissed the tops of her breasts. She smiled at him, her white eyes half shut.

Chouza showered, scraped off remaining blood, dirt, gum and sweat, towel-dried himself off, and climbed into bed, where Megumi was waiting for him, naked and alluring and as beautiful as ever, Chouza thought, even in her fifties. How lucky he was to have such a wife to come home to. She did not ask about the mission. He would tell her when he was less tired. He lay back and let her climb on top of him, and she straddled him and he cupped her face in his hands and pulled her forward and they kissed, and they lay wrapped in each other's arms, interlocked, her brown hair and his red hair flowing into each other, until she came, jerking her head back and moaning, not caring if Chouji and Yumi heard, and then Chouza came too and Megumi detached herself from him, his sperm trickling warmly down her fleshy legs, and wordlessly, he began to cry and she held him and stroked his hair until the tears subsided.

And Kiba buried his head in the crook of Kankuro's neck.


	16. Wolf: The Wedding

Morning.

Kankuro was standing under the Inuzukas' shower, dousing himself liberally with a lemon-scented shower gel he'd bought a few weeks ago, and which Kiba had teased him about. “You might like smelling of dog, but I don't,” Kankuro had retorted. He washed behind his ears, in the crook of his neck, under his arms, the creases between his thighs and pelvis, and between his legs. He stepped out of the shower, towelled himself off, brushed his teeth.

Kiba sat on the bed, in his black jacket and striped trousers, tying a red ceremonial collar around Akamaru's neck and watching Kankuro dress. First the trousers. Then the kimono. Then the purple sash with the small ceremonial sword tucked into it, then the ceremonial collar for humans that Inuzuka wore at their weddings, then the matching jacket to top it all off. Kankuro had practiced putting his wedding outfit on several times in preparation for the real thing, and yet, as Kiba tied his purple sash for him, it felt as though he were wearing it for the first time.

Downstairs, Shikoku, Hana, Tsume, Kishu, Shouza, the twins and the dogs were all waiting for them. As soon as Kankuro and Kiba stepped into the kitchen, Kishu and Shouza cheered and clapped. Shikoku was bouncing Akita, the dark-haired 'runt' of the family and the spitting image of baby Kiba, up and down on his knee, while Hana was holding a wriggling Shiba, a 'stroppy little pup' with her father's dirty blonde hair. Tsume was already in her kimono, while Kuromaru sported his own ceremonial collar. Shikoku had put his formal outfit on, but Hana was still wearing one of her husband's t-shirts.

“Well, well, look who's here,” Hana greeted them. “The big day has arrived. What would you boys like for breakfast?”

“Fried steak, please,” said Kiba, before Kankuro could offer any opinion. Shikoku dumped Akita on Kiba's lap, saying, “Coming right up.” He drizzled oil into a frying pan and dropped in two hefty beef sirloin steaks. The kitchen filled with the smell of frying meat and the teriyaki marinade in which the steaks had been bathing. Kiba was tickling his nephew, saying, “Who's a little runt, then?” Kankuro decided to make himself useful and fed Akamaru his favourite kibble. “Get this down yer, you big bugger,” he said in low tones, “it's gonna be a long day.”

Two plates of fried steak, one medium (Kankuro) and one rare (Kiba) were plonked down on the table. “There you are, tuck in,” said Shikoku. Kiba wolfed his steak down, while Kankuro had to force himself to eat his; not because his soon-to-be brother-in-law could not cook, but because his stomach was tying itself in knots with nerves.

_So much shit has happened to me. Please, gods, I know you're out there. Don't fuck this one up for me too, please. Not just for my sake, for his as well._

Having got their own breakfast down them, Kiba and Kankuro offered to wash up, but Hana dismissed them, saying, “Shut up, it's your big day. Anyway, you two need some alone time.”

“I'll be down there a bit after you, Hana,” Tsume said. “A couple of last minute things I need to sort out.” She turned to Kankuro and Kiba, licked Kiba's face – Kankuro was still a little squeamish about the Inuzuka clan's greetings - and said, “See you down the shrine.” She and Kuromaru sped off to the Hokage's building.

“Me 'n' the kids'll be along a bit after you,” said Shikoku. “Got to get the little ones fed and stuff. Anyway, you've got to do your bath thing, yeah?”

“What barf fing?” Kishu wanted to know.

“Your uncles have to take a nice long bath to purify themselves in the eyes of the spirits before the wedding, basically,” Hana explained. “No, you can't go with them, it's for people getting married only.”

Kiba licked his sister's nose. “See you all down the shrine,” Kankuro called, shoving his hands into the pockets of his kimono, and realising there weren't any.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

In the tiled bathing room in the small building where married couples-to-be took ritual baths, Kankuro and Kiba showered for the second time that day, and then lowered themselves into the pool, which was filled with the water from a nearby hot spring. They sank under the water, making sure every inch of their bodies was covered. The heat made Kankuro horny, and he noticed Kiba had an erection, but although he wasn't the most religious of men, he did feel uneasy about having sex in a ceremonial place.

Kankuro recited the pre-wedding prayer he'd learned by heart, as Kiba shook his head, spraying droplets everywhere, and towelled himself off. He towel-dried himself, wiped the small mirror in the bathroom clean and applied his make-up. He wasn't going to go overboard; all he needed was a little kohl eyeliner and purple eyeshadow. He decided to give his lips a miss; he and Kiba would look like total arses with purple lippy smeared on their faces after the inevitable kiss. He looked at his newly made-up face in the mirror and gave himself a thumbs-up.

“You're wearing slap?” Kiba's voice bounced off the tiles. “You _girl_.”

“I've got to look my best for our wedding,” said Kankuro.

After the two men had towelled themselves off and dressed, they prepared to go to the shrine. Kiba wasn't moving. Kankuro asked him what the hell he was doing and to get a move on, they hadn't got all day.

“You go first,” Kiba directed him.

“Why?”

“Isn't it obvious?” laughed Kiba. “You've been around Inuzukas and dogs long enough.”

“Stop talking bollocks, Kiba.”

Kiba snorted. “Mate, it ain't bollocks. Have you seen dog packs? Or Akamaru when he's around Kuromaru? The strongest dog goes first, right? Kuromaru could have Akamaru, and Akamaru knows this, don't you, boy?” The dog barked in affirmation. “It's how the weaker one in the relationship shows submission to the stronger. You're older and stronger than me, you were a jounin way before I was, you're cleverer than I am. So if we was dogs, I'd be walking behind you.”

“But we're not dogs.”

“And? My clan are _af-fi-li-ated_ with dogs, Kankuro. You spend enough time around dogs, you act like them. It's why we get on with them so well, we can speak their language. Now lead me in.”

Kankuro sighed, shrugged his shoulders, and began to walk to the shrine. Kiba followed him on Akamaru's back, his head bowed. Kankuro had half a mind to remove his sash and tie it to Kiba's collar.

_You're older and stronger than me._

_You're cleverer than me._

_And yet,_ Kankuro thought, _you're kinder than I am. You're more optimistic than I am. You're happier than I am. Which one of us is really the better man?_

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Down at the shrine, the first five attendants to arrive – Hana, Temari, Shikamaru, Kurenai and Hinata - were waiting in the anteroom. Each woman had her hair piled on top of her head; a small red flower nestled in Kurenai's greying hair, while Hinata's was held up by chopsticks. Although the others did not know it yet, she was pregnant for the third time.

Shikamaru polished his glasses on the edge of his green kimono. He felt somewhat dull compared to the colourful women – Kurenai was in deep purple, Hana in scarlet, Hinata in lilac and Temari in russet. Still, he reminded himself, green was the signature colour of the Nara, and a good solid colour, the colour of camouflage, the colour of trees in spring. _A sensible colour for a boring, sensible advisor,_ Shikamaru thought wryly. He was a skinny, dark-haired crow among parrots.

“How do I look?” Temari asked, absently brushing away a stray strand of hair.

“Lovely, as always,” replied Shikamaru. “And you three aren't so bad yourselves.” He smiled. “I feel a bit emasculated here.”

“We've still got three attendants to go,” Hinata reminded him. “Sakura-sama, Tsume-sama, and Chouza-sama. They did get back in time, didn't they? I heard they were on a mission.”

Her question was answered when Tsume came stomping in, dressed in a black ceremonial kimono, Kuromaru at her side. She was followed by Sakura Haruno in pink, her hair held up with ornamental chopsticks, a basket of flowers in her arms, and another, much bigger attendant in an indigo kimono bearing the symbol of the Akimichi clan, his thick red hair pulled back into a braid which came down past his shoulderblades. Shikamaru had to force himself not to stare. He couldn't remember the last time he'd seen Chouza in formal wear, aside from his elder's robes.

“All present and correct,” announced Tsume, as Kuromaru scratched his ear with his hind leg.

“At least you're not the token boy anymore,” Chouza added. He sniffed the air. “My gods, this place smells beautiful. Like spring.”

The bridegrooms entered, and were instantly greeted by the sound of their attendants cheering and Kuromaru and the Haimaru Sankyodai barking. Five women and two men descended upon them in a haze of rich jewel shades and intermingling smells of fried meat, milk, flowers, herbs, smoke, and an undercurrent of that strangely haunting smell the clan heads had which made Kiba uneasy. Chouza's facial 'tiger stripe' markings, Kuromaru's eye patch, Shikamaru's glasses, Hinata's soft, rounded body, the flowers, the robes of the priestess, Kurenai's red eyes, Temari's raucous laughter, Sakura's scarred face, all became a blur. Neither Kankuro nor Kiba could register what any of their attendants were saying. Kurenai and Sakura were doling out bunches of flowers to the other attendants: pink gysophila for Tsume, poinsettia for Hana, bluebells for Hinata, jasmine for Temari, lilacs for Shikamaru, violets for Chouza. Sakura herself was carrying a cherry blossom bouquet, while Kurenai had purple roses. Tsume produced the ceremonial leash and clipped one end to Kiba's collar, and the other to Kankuro's, and the two men climbed up onto Akamaru's back, Kankuro – the alpha male - in front. He overheard Chouza say, “And people think _my_ clan's rituals are unusual,” followed by his soon-to-be mother-in-law retorting, “Megumi should put a leash on _you_ , Baconhead.” 

“Well, then,” said the priestess, “shall we begin?”

Temari took charge. “Right, you lot,” she called, “you all got your flowers?”

There was a general murmur of assent. The bridal party formed a line, ready to move into the main area of the shrine. The miko, some way in front, was calling, “Please stand for the wedding party.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

In the main hall of the shrine, where weddings take place, Konohamaru Sarutobi, Konoha's youngest clan head, is standing in the seating area on the left side of the shrine – opposite the anteroom - with his hands shoved in his pockets and the other two members of the Ino-Shika-Chou trio nearby with their partners and babies. He has never seen so many dogs in one place. They have evidently been ordered to be on their best behaviour, and are either squatting on their haunches, scratching an ear here and licking a hand there, or curled up at their owners' feet. Big dogs, little dogs, puppies, brown, black, grey, blue, white, gold, spotted and patchy dogs, floppy-eared dogs and pointy-eared dogs, dogs with bits missing, fluffy dogs, stocky dogs, rail-thin dogs. Kakashi's pack, now the summons of the Hokage, wander among them, conspicuous by their coats and forehead protectors. Most of the Inuzuka dogs themselves are not wearing any kind of clothing, though the occasional one sports a forehead protector round its neck. Konohamaru is glad he likes dogs. His own summon is the one he'd inherited from his grandfather, the monkey Enma, but he wouldn't mind his own dog pack. Still, he is a Sarutobi, and it is only fitting; after all, Zakuro Akimichi has a giant butterfly, Shikamaru's clan has members who could summon deer. _Does Ino's dad have a pig? Oh gods, that big fucker over there is licking his balls. Well, I guess they're dogs, they probably can't get their furry little heads round manners._ The smell is beginning to get to him. He hopes the dogs aren't going to shit on the floor, but then ninja dogs are trained, aren't they? 

The canine contingent of the room squat on their haunches, their heads and ears erect, as the eight attendants walk into the room behind the priestess and the miko. Tsume and Hana, as Kiba's closest blood relatives, lead the way with their dogs in tow, followed by Kurenai and Hinata, who are there as Kiba's sensei and former team mate. Shino, however, is conspicuous by his absence. _What an arsehole Shino is_ , thinks Konohamaru. _He could have at least come to his old team mate's wedding. All the rest of that group did._ They are followed by Temari and Shikamaru, and then – to several people's surprise – Chouza, dressed in the traditional robes of his clan, and Sakura, her head held high.

“What are those two doing up there?” whispers Konohamaru to Chouji, whose eyes are filling with proud tears at the sight of his father, whose bunch of violets looks so tiny and fragile in his huge hands, and his best friend. Behind them, Yumi holds a peaceful Chouyomi in her arms. Her grandfather's tiger stripes are now showing on her face. Ino is cuddling Inosuke. Sai looks as passive as usual. Shikane, the third member of the baby Ino-Shika-Chou trio, is being looked after by his grandparents.

“Kiba and Kankuro are repaying Dad 'cause him and Shikamaru helped them with the dual alliance thingy,” Chouji whispers back. Rock Lee, who is standing erect behind Chouji, adds, “And Sakura-sama saved Kankuro's life. He is in her debt.”

A short distance away, the Sixth Hokage, a guest of honour, overhears Lee's words and his face lights up with pride. He points to Sakura and says to Jiraiya, seated on his shoulders, “Look, there's your mum. Isn't she pretty?”

Finally, Kankuro and Kiba come riding in on Akamaru's back. It was a tight squeeze, and Kankuro wasn't getting any thinner, but Kiba had managed to make enough room for both of them to sit on the big dog. Kankuro's imagination went into overdrive, as the scenario of a play unwound in his head.

_He is a black-clad drifter walking through a forest, along a path lit by lanterns, to the sacred place where his lover, the wolf prince, would become human, and they would be wed. He is bringing up the rear of a procession of animals. First come two dark-furred she-wolves: the Queen of the Wolves, the pack leader, and her daughter, the wolf princess. The falcon princess and the snowy owl fly overhead, followed by the stag – the son of the King of the Deer - with the white weasel clinging to his neck, and the pink cat riding serenely on the shaggy head of the King of the Tigers._

_The ronin lays his hand on the wolf's head. They walk into the middle of a circle of animals, who part to let them through. He can see wolves everywhere, the fox - who is also the forest king - the King of the Deer, the King of the Horses, the King of the Falcons, the young King of the Monkeys and the King of the Insects, along with their consorts and children,and his great friends, the black kangaroo, the fossa and the prince of the tigers, with a tiger cub nestling between his paws. A pine marten sits on the horse princess's white head, a white foal between her hooves._

Kiba circles Kankuro seven times. After completing his final circle, he kneels down by Kankuro's side, takes hold of Kankuro's right hand, and licks it. In return, Kankuro scratches his nose.

_...the wolf walks around the drifter, its nose to the ground in a position of submission. Now its hot red tongue licks the drifter's hand, and he playfully scratches its nose, a sign of friendship and trust between them. As the drifter has lived in the forest, he has gotten to know all these creatures and heard their secrets. He has learned the way of the wolves._

Kurenai is making a speech. She is telling the shrine about how she has watched Kiba grow, making them laugh with her memories of what a hot-headed little nutter he was, before he came of age. She talks of her pride in his tracking skills, his nose and his kindness to animals, and watching him become a chuunin, then a jounin, and how he will always be a part of Team Eight. Hinata is welling up.

Tsume is next. She introduces the poem she is about to read, saying, “As head of the Inuzuka clan, I know a thing or two about dogs and loyalty. We always pride ourselves on our loyalty to Konoha and to each other, including the ones we love, and I'd like to dedicate this little reading to my son and my new son-in-law, and hope that the bond between them will be as strong as the one between man and dog...well, _person_ and dog, let's not be sexist.

 

“ _Great is the loyalty of the dog._

_Heaven has seen fit to bless this noble beast_

_With the swiftest of feet and the greatest of hearts._

_When the human returns home, he jumps for joy._

_When the human weeps, the dog lays his head on his lap._

_When the human is joyful, the dog wags his tail._

_When the human is sick, the dog offers succour._

_When the human is in danger, the dog protects him._

_Great is the loyalty of the dog,_

_And of the the human who owns him, nay,_

_Who walks alongside him as friend and brother._

_When the human dies, the dog howls at his grave;_

_He raises not his head, his tail remains still,_

_For great is the loyalty of the dog._

_He repays every kindness, forgives every sin,_

_He will not judge, nor will he scorn, nor mock._

_The bond between dog and human is the testament of centuries._

_Great is the loyalty of the dog.”_

 

The ceremony takes a solemn turn, for it is time for Kankuro and Kiba to make their vows.

... _the drifter has been called to swear an oath of loyalty to the wolf prince..._

Repeating after the priestess, Kankuro and Kiba say in turn: “I marry this man, no matter what his health situation is. I will love him, respect him, console him, and help him until death, protecting fidelity. I swear.”

“Kankuro,” says the priestess, “you have chosen Kiba Inuzuka to marry and become your partner. In peaceful times and in sickness, will you love Kiba, respect him, comfort him, help him, until death? Do you promise to fulfil all of these?”

“Yes,” says Kankuro, his head held high, “I promise.”

“And you, Kiba Inuzuka,” says the priestess. “you have chosen Kankuro Sabukuno to marry and become your partner. In peaceful times and in sickness, will you love Kankuro, respect him, comfort him, help him, until death? Do you promise to fulfil all of these?”

Kiba wants to scream out, _yes, yes, yes, I promise, I love him, I fucking love him, I swear I'll do anything!_ But instead, he says, “Yes, I promise.” Hinata bites her lip.

 _I am so proud of you, my son,_ thinks Tsume.

The priestess begins to call up the attendants for the seven blessings. “First, the mother of the first bridegroom, Tsume Inuzuka.”

_The Queen of the Wolves raises her head to the sky and howls..._

Tsume says, “ _Blessed are ye spirits who have created all life upon this earth, and may ye bless my son, Kiba Inuzuka, and my son-in-law, Kankuro Sabakuno, with long life._ ”

“Second, the sister of the first bridegroom, Hana Inuzuka.”

_...she is accompanied by her daughter, the wolf princess..._

Hana says, “ _Blessed are ye spirits, who have enabled us to survive that we may witness this happy occasion, and may ye bless my brother, Kiba Inuzuka, and my brother-in-law, Kankuro Sabakuno, with strength._ ”

“Third, the sensei of the first bridegroom, Kurenai Sarutobi-Yuuhi.”

_...the snowy owl circles high above their heads, screeching..._

Kurenai says, “ _Blessed are ye spirits who dwell in the forests and the fields, the rivers and the seas and skies, the plants and the trees and the mountains and the animals. May ye bless my student, Kiba Inuzuka, and Kankuro Sabakuno with good health._ ”

“Fourth, the team mate of the first bridegroom, Hinata Hyuuga.”

_...after the snowy owl lands on a tree branch, the falcon circles the bridal couple and cries out her blessing..._

Biting back tears, Hinata says, “ _Blessed are ye spirits who present us throughout our lives with trials and obstacles, yet also with hope and determination, that we may grow stronger, and may ye bless my comrade, Kiba Inuzuka, and Kankuro Sabakuno with courage._ ”

“Fifth, the sister of the second bridegroom, Temari Nara.”

_...the weasel springs from the stag's back and scampers over the drifter's shoulders, nibbles his ear, and leaps onto the wolf prince's back. She runs down the length of his spine and launches herself back onto the stag..._

Temari raises her head proudly and said, “ _Blessed are ye spirits who created love, beauty and harmony, who unite the hearts and minds of men, and may ye bless my brother-in-law, Kiba Inuzuka, and my brother, Kankuro Sabakuno, with love._ ”

“Sixth, the brother-in-law of the second bridegroom, Shikamaru Nara.”

_...as the tiger prince, the King of the Deer and the horse princess watch from the shadows, the stag prince raises his horned head and bellows at the moon..._

Shikamaru says, “ _Blessed are ye spirits, who created peace, friendship and companionship, and may ye bless Kiba Inuzuka and my brother-in-law, Kankuro Sabakuno, with peace._ ” He nodded at Ino and Chouji.

“Seventh, a double blessing: Jounin Commander and Elder of Konoha, Chouza Akimichi, and wife of the Hokage, Sakura Haruno.”

_...the pink cat and the King of the Tigers raise their heads. The cat miaows, and the great tiger roars so loudly as to shake the whole forest...._

Chouza and Sakura say in unison: “ _Blessed are ye spirits, who created joy and happiness, and whose laughter resonates through the forests and the fields, the seas and the skies. May ye bless Kiba Inuzuka and Kankuro Sabakuno with happiness._ ”

After Chouza and Sakura return to their places, the priestess says the concluding words:

“ _ Blessed are ye Kami, who created joy and gladness, love and harmony, peace and companionship. O great and mighty Ones, may there ever be heard in the village of Konoha voices of joy and gladness, voices of the bridegrooms, the jubilant voices of those joined in marriage under the bridal canopy, the voices of young people feasting and singing. Blessed are ye spirits who cause the groom to rejoice with his husband.  _ _ And henceforth, may Kiba of the Inuzuka clan of Konoha, and Kankuro of the Sabakuno family of Sunagakure, be joined in marriage.  _ You may now kiss the bridegroom. ” 

_...The drifter kneels, and kisses the wolf prince. A gash appears along the belly of the animal. He stands upon his hind legs and sheds his skin, like a human shedding clothing, to reveal the shape of a man. A naked, shaggy-haired man with fangs and red triangular markings on his cheeks. And he embraces the drifter, and as the animals and the forest itself sing their songs, they dance in the middle of the circle._

And with that, Kiba makes an offering of meat to Inari, Kankuro and Kiba drink three times from the communal cup of sake and pass it round the attendants, and Temari places a wine glass on the floor at Kankuro's feet, and he grinds it to shards beneath his heel. Then he hears the sound of clapping, and sees that it is coming from Shikaku, who is leaning on Inoichi's shoulder and bellowing, “Congratulations, Kankuro and Kiba!” Lee shouts, “Hurrah!”, and he and Chouji and Naruto, with Jiraiya sitting on his shoulders, join in the clapping; then the attendants; then Koutei and Konohamaru; then the rest of the room was cheering and clapping, and even Hiashi joined in, if only because he does not want to draw attention to himself by refusing to applaud the newlyweds, and because his older daughter does look so very beautiful as she wipes away tears and Kurenai – so long ago a surrogate mother for Hinata, and now a mother to her own child- lays a comforting arm around her shoulders. The horde of Inuzuka dogs bark and howl in chorus. So do their owners. Kankuro's face burns. He lets himself be dragged around to pose for pictures; with Kiba, with all eight attendants, with Shikamaru and Temari, with Chouza and Sakura, with Lee, Chouji and Tenten. _I'm not used to being the centre of attention,_ he thinks as Chouji places a brotherly arm around his shoulders and Lee does a cheesy pose, _but I_ could _get used to it. Yeah. I could get used to it._

Tsume nods at Chouza, who bends down to allow her to climb onto his back. Sitting on Chouza's shoulders, Tsume shouts at the top of her voice, “Everyone! Party round at ours!”

“Gods, you're heavy,” moans the larger Jounin Commander. “I think I'm getting a crick in my neck.”

“That's rich coming from you, Baconhead,” says the Inuzuka clan head, as she jumps down from Chouza's back. “You coming?”

“Hell yeah,” says Chouza, undoing his braid. He shakes his head until his hair comes loose and says, “When have I ever turned down an invitation?”

“Thank the gods,” says Inoichi to Shikaku, as the pair of them leave. “We've got our old team mate back.”

 _Ah_ , thinks Shikaku, _but for how long?_

And here ends the wedding ceremony of Kankuro Sabakuno and Kiba Inuzuka, and here begins a new life.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kiba and Kankuro were first to arrive at the Inuzuka compound, and as Kankuro dashed upstairs to quickly change into his irochiakake, Kiba nearly tripped over a basket that had been left outside the door. He glanced down and saw to his delight that it was filled with his favourite beef jerky, and on top of the pile of meat, there was a note.

_To Kiba and Kankuro,_

_I'm sorry I couldn't make the wedding. Here is a present. Hope you like._

_Shino_

“He remembered after all,” said Kiba, relieved, as Kankuro came downstairs, clad in red and silver. “He remembered after all, Kankuro.”

The sight of Kiba's happy face made Kankuro smile in spite of himself. He drew Kiba to him and murmured, “So. We're finally...official.”

“What do you mean, 'finally official'?” Kiba teased him. “I don't need a piece of paper to show I love you.”

“There is that,” Kankuro conceded.

The two men heard shouts and the patter of paws and feet, and broke away from each other as they turned to see Hinata and Kou coming towards the house, with Hana, Shikoku, and numerous dogs and children behind them. The festivities were about to begin.

“Let's hope we get some privacy,” Kiba muttered out the side of his mouth. “We'll need to have our first shag as a married couple at some point.”

“It's all sex sex sex with you, isn't it,” Kankuro pretended to complain.

“You love it,” replied Kiba, and in a louder voice, he called, “Hinata! Everyone! Come on in!”

What happened next was a blur, just like Shikamaru's stag night. Tsume making a speech about diplomatic relations and how proud she was to have a Kage's brother for a son-in-law, and also something about desert dogs, and insisting that Chouza and Shikamaru be applauded for their help. Kiba and Kankuro being hoisted on their friends' shoulders and touching hands as the men carrying them danced around the room. Bean paste buns and all kinds of sweets being passed around. Hinata saying something to Sakura and Sakura howling with laughter and slapping her thighs. Jiraiya wolfing down food and playing with Taki Nara. Shikaku talking gardening with Hiashi, as always. Kiba opening his beef jerky and tossing some to a happy Akamaru, and then slapping Chouji round the face with another piece. Yoshino complimenting Ayame on the flowers. Dogs barking, the rich baritones of Shikaku and Chouza in a duet, feet stamping, sake glasses clinking, Hinata laughing through her tears, Lee waxing lyrical, Konohamaru reading extracts from _Come Come Paradise_ in a comedy accent, Shikamaru taking his baby son out to look at the stars. Ninja celebrating life instead of death, for a change.

And at some point, Kankuro and Kiba retired for the promised 'first shag as a married couple', wrapped in each other's bodies until it seemed that there was no distinction where Kankuro ended and Kiba began. Smudged eyeliner and red triangles, fangs scraping tongues, Kiba between Kankuro's big powerful thighs, sweat streaming down their backs, heads thrown back in ecstasy, a two-headed, contorted, hot and hungry beast. Two men in love, the grass around them and the desert – and another wedding party, courtesy of Gaara, the Harumichi and the Puppet Squad - lying in wait.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

While the relief patrol squads turned up at their posts to began their night shifts, a four-person cell left the village for a mission, off-duty shinobi mingled with civilians in the bars, and Shibi Aburame and his bugs kept watch at the Hokage's building, the remainder of Konoha slept.

Inside his living quarters, the Hokage lay sprawled on his back, his mouth wide open, while his wife was lost in dreams of cherry blossoms and dancing dogs. A little boy with pinkish-gold hair sucked his thumb and cuddled his toy frog.

At the Nara compound, Shikaku and Yoshino lay spooning. Shikamaru padded into his son's room, then his daughter's room, and kissed them both on their warm little heads. Temari thought of her brothers, and her new brother-in-law, and smiled. They would do each other good, morons though they were.

At the Yamanaka compound, Ino lay moaning with Sai's head between her legs, his tongue flicking onward and upward inside her. Inoichi and Ayame filled each other's heads with erotic dreams.

At the Akimichi compound, while a fat baby slept, two couples were fucking. Chouji and Yumi rolled around on the floor of their bedroom, their hands in each other's hair. Chouza lay with his back arched, his mouth hanging open and his head thrown back, his wife on top of him, nuzzling his neck.

Shino sat at the Aburame table, waiting for his cup of tea to cool, and hoped that Kiba had enjoyed his present. He would not go upstairs yet. He did not want to disturb his girlfriend.

For the first time in weeks, Hinata slept peacefully. She had gone to bed thinking that Kiba was happy, and therefore, so was she. She would see him again.

In a bed at the Inuzuka compound, an old woman lay with her head buried in the fur on the back of her wolf-dog, his familiar coat tickling her face.

In the kitchen, three grey dogs and a brown dog slept in their baskets, while their owners and four little children snored upstairs.

And in another bed, a large white dog lay curled up at the foot, warming the feet of the two young men who slept in it. Both dark-haired, one wiry, with fangs and red markings on his cheeks, the other heavy-set, with scarring on his legs and a double chin. One born in a leafy village, one born in a desert. Their union was another string that would bind Konoha to Suna.

Kankuro's final thought before he fell asleep was: _I am happy now. For the first time in years, I am really happy. My beautiful Kiba. I don't know what I'd have done with my life if I hadn't met you._

 


End file.
